The Point of No Return

[Rosie.]

Hey everyone! 
 

it’s been a minute since I last posted, so I thought I’d check in!

 

I’m six months into facial hair removal (doing laser first, then will follow up with electrolysis). This has been largely great, the upper lip region has definitely been challenging though. Im

looking into doing work on my chest as well.
 

I’m two months into HRT (spiro/estradiol). It’s early days for my body, but I’m extremely excited to be on a path the path I am. It’s awesome to feel the changes in my breasts happen so quickly, lots of sensitivity thus far. 
 

I had a pretty large set back with my gender therapist; which necessitated a change in provider. Unfortunately the specialist I was seeing couldn’t remember a thing about me, even after ten sessions …. let alone my name or pronouns. This was further exacerbated by them ghosting me several times. This provider also had some rather antiquated views on femininity and was rigidly binary in their approach to gender. Anyway, paying out of pocket doesn’t always land you a great provider. Im hesitant to name the specific provider here as I’ve seen largely positive reviews from them on this site. 

I’ve returned to my previous therapist (not specialized), who is wonderful. Although she isn’t focused primarily on trans care, she’s actively seeking out professional resources and helping me in a supportive and introspective way. I’m not currently looking for any surgery letters, so I’m getting what I need.

 

On the coming out front, I’m on the precipice of living out full time. I’ve come out to most of my family and close friends. With the exception of my father, it’s gone surprisingly well. Unfortunately, I’m in a position where I may have to seek the assistance of law enforcement for safety reasons regarding him. I’m trying to avoid judicial proceedings, but I care more about avoiding being assaulted.  I’ve been pleasantly surprised by the rest of my family. Although there are a lot of questions, they are mostly kind and supportive in nature. 

 

I came out to my Human Resources Department; they appeared confused and thought I was soliciting gay sex. The upper management team has been significantly more supportive.  I’ve had half a dozen meetings with then to plan my professional roll out. I’m going to come out via letter to several hundred colleagues in the near future. Im also orchestrating coming out to a lateral organization that I work with on a daily basis.  I have no meaningful control over that organization, so it’s complicated for different reasons. There are a lot of other internal administrative policy changes that I’m also trying to effectuate. Anyway, my manager is going to the mat for me. So I’m hopefully it will not be a complete dumpster fire.
 

My name change petition should be in shortly! I’m working on the rest of the identity document trail too. 

 

I’ll be out full time in April. I think this is going to be one hell of a year. Im definitely looking forward to experiencing a different kind of stress.  I don’t want to hide anymore.
 

Best, 

 

Rosie. 

[stveee]

12 hours ago, Rosie. said:

 

 

 

I came out to my Human Resources Department; they appeared confused and thought I was soliciting gay sex.

 whoa. That's a little glitch there!

thanks for the update, I am pretty much at the same stages too and it's interesting to hear other's experiences..

[Susan R]

21 hours ago, Rosie. said:

I’ll be out full time in April. I think this is going to be one hell of a year. Im definitely looking forward to experiencing a different kind of stress.  I don’t want to hide anymore.

Hi Rosie, What an exciting time for you these upcoming several months. That ‘point of no return’ comes to us because there is no better choice once we know who we are inside. I on occasion look back on my own journey and despite several serious setbacks, I have some wonderful memories of “finally becoming myself”. If I had to do it all again with the knowledge I have now, I’d likely change a few things to avoid a few potholes but my journey wouldn’t change too much.

 

I believe you’ll truly enjoy your new life without all that old baggage you know now was not meant to be. So far it sounds like everything is coming together for you. I do hope the difficulties with your father work out without having to involve law enforcement. That’s a tough road. Even the stuff at work will get ironed out before you know it. You’re your own best advocate and getting those new policies changed at work will definitely help someone else going through this down the line. 

 

I look forward to reading more about your changes and new opportunities as they come along if you feel comfortable sharing here. I wish you the best on your upcoming challenges.

 

Warmest Regards,

Susan R🌷

[Katie M]

Hi, Rosie! I'm so excited for you! My own coming out has been deliberately more slowly, but am finding it rewarding at all points along the way (maybe because I'm already over 60, my "I don't really give a damn what most people think" attitude is helping me...lol!)

 

Wishing you all the best! 💜

[Guest]

I’m sorry that you are having issues with your father and your HR. While my managers were supportive, I did have some coworkers that had issues with me. I’m suspicious of those who immediately equate being trans with perversion and sex work.

[Rosie.]

**UPDATE March 24, 2022** 

 

At approximately 3:00PM today I sent out my coming out letter to over one hundred co-workers.  At approximately 3:10PM I received my name change order signed by the judge. 
 

Tomorrow will be my first day out at work! 
 

I’m wickedly excited and have a grey striped dress ready to go!  

[Vidanjali]

Right on @Rosie. ! That's wonderful! Enjoy the freedom - enjoy being you! 

[Kelly2509]

awesome @Rosie.!!!  I'm so excited for you!

 

I'm sending that letter out on Thursday the 31st to coincide with Day of Visibility, so I'm right behind you! ❤️  My hearing is May 18, so I have some time to wait before all the legal nuts and bolts get figured out though ;)

[Katie M]

I am so happy for you, @Rosie.!💜

[Charlize]

Congratulations Roșie and the best of luck with your co-workers!  I remember that time as being stressful but so liberating.  It felt like i had dropped the weight of shame and fear i had carried for iso long. 

Enjoy!!!

 

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[Maddee]

Congratulations Rosie!

 

taking big steps at work and your life😊

🌈🌈