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I need some advice.


Parker_23

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So, I have a bit of an issue. I currently identify as unlabelled (all pronouns), but the thing is I'm pretty uncomfortable with not having something to call myself. 

However, I can't seem to find a label that fits me. I'm uncomfortable with feminine pronouns and would like to use masculine pronouns, but I prefer to present more feminine (skirts, makeup, etc.). I experience a lot of gender dysphoria, but I'm content with my current presentation. Is there any label out there for my situation?

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  • Forum Moderator

I think non-binary about covers it. I have non-binary friends that took T to look masculine. I have non-binary friends that dress in a masculine way. I have non-binary friends that wear skirts and appear feminine. All of them are cool with whatever pronouns you care to give them, though I try to use they/them because I don't want to be an ass. They're friends.

The only one where pronouns are an issue is a bi-gendered friend who prefers that I use whatever pronouns match their presentation in that particular moment. I use they when I'm not conversing face-to-face because I have no way of knowing how they're presenting when they're absent.

 

At the end of the day though, the only person who can answer that question is you. May I recommend: Minority Monsters?

 

Hugs!

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Hi Parker! Reading your post, the emoji in the movie Emoji who at the end cycled through a lot of different expressions. Maybe you could try different labels until one feels comfortable to you.

 

Hugs!

Delcina

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Hi Parker !
 

I just saw your post and it hit right home with my experience so I'm giving you my two cents. I identify now as non-binary (I label as agender but I don't really care for labels). Anyway, I'm afab like you and do experience dysphoria (to the point I thought I was a trans man at some point). Every now and then I like to present more feminine, more masculine or a bit of both. But I do prefer neutral pronouns or masculine pronouns, (especially that in my language there is no complete neutral in the grammar). The thing is to try what makes you feel the most comfortable, (personnally I tried first with my closest relatives) and really how you present doesn't invalidate the need to have masculine pronouns or anything. I still use the same pronouns on days when I wear a skirt or makeup or whatever. Anything you'll do is completely valid as long as you feel like it !

I hope this helps a bit, and know you have my support !

 

Milo

 

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