What did you get out of therapy?

[Marcie Jensen]

1 hour ago, SheenaT said:

I threw out all my male undies. That one decision means so much and affirms alot. My wife accepts that part of me so far. There is just something about wearing panties!

😂 🥰 Right there with ya, sis!  And, I'm glad your wife accepts that part of you.

[SheenaT]

1 minute ago, Marcie Jensen said:

😂 🥰 Right there with ya, sis!  And, I'm glad your wife accepts that part of you.

🤗

[Fly2188]

On 6/29/2022 at 9:18 AM, SheenaT said:

I threw out all my male undies. That one decision means so much and affirms alot. My wife accepts that part of me so far. There is just something about wearing panties!

That ship sailed for me years ago. I was so happy when I got rid of my last pair of mens. At first I stuck to boring plain colored panties, but lately I’ve  been switching to cuter colors and prints - reds, pinks, purples, florals. 

 

On 6/29/2022 at 10:34 AM, Jaycie said:

I can't wear male undies anymore and all mine are gone!! I always wanted a bra and panty drawer and now I have one. It makes me feel super femme and puts a smile on my face every time I open it!!! 

I  completely agree. I love opening my top drawer and seeing all my bras and panties. I still get sad seeing my undershirts and socks in there though. I’ve toyed with the idea of replacing my undershirts with camis, but am not sure they’d look right under my male work outerwear. 

[SheenaT]

9 hours ago, Jaycie said:

Camis are very gender affirming if you can make the work I recommend them for sure! The do make many styles too...

Oooh might have to try camis

[SheenaT]

14 hours ago, Fly2188 said:

That ship sailed for me years ago. I was so happy when I got rid of my last pair of mens. At first I stuck to boring plain colored panties, but lately I’ve  been switching to cuter colors and prints - reds, pinks, purples, florals. 

 

I  completely agree. I love opening my top drawer and seeing all my bras and panties. I still get sad seeing my undershirts and socks in there though. I’ve toyed with the idea of replacing my undershirts with camis, but am not sure they’d look right under my male work outerwear. 

No bras yet but my drawer is stuffed with cute and comfy panties.

[Fly2188]

Well, I’m on to my 3rd therapist at the same practice. The other two left abruptly and I don’t know why. I got assigned to someone who has been there for a while now. She seems like a better/more experienced therapist in general, but has less (minimal) experience with gender identity and lgbt. Her focus has been on other issues/treatments. 

Lately I had other no gender issues I wanted to talk with her about so that wasn’t a problem. Today our discussion finally started to touch on gender identity issues. We didn’t dive specifically into gender, but I did briefly mention it being a recurring stressor in my life. 
 

So who knows how this will go, but I’m starting over with someone new again. I hope she stays more long term. If not, I need to find a new practice as it would clearly be something wrong with the practice/management of the practice. 

[Trans22]

I've been lucky in that I've had great experiences with both my therapists.  I often wonder whether I'd still be existing as a man, ignorant of the fact that gender exists in a spectrum, if it weren't for the tangent that a work funded leadership coaching program took for me.   Trauma I suffered from puberty onset had been blinding me - my adult existence up to the age of almost 52 was spent trying to ignore my life as a child and teenager.  My opening up, somewhat, to my first therapist ultimately led her to telling me that I was born with a female mind.  I switched to a gender therapist about 10 months later.  I've now completed 12 sessions and I expect to need a lot more - I still have an many open mental wounds that need healing.  There is a lot that I still haven't been brave enough to talk about with either therapist.  E.g., Despite how beautiful my life is now, I am still dealing with the darkest of thoughts on an almost daily basis, but at least they make me cry now.

[Lydia_R]

I've been seeing my GT for 13 months.  She was the first one I really came out to.  I too say that GT is vital.  The first thing she did was suggest I get on a transgender forum and that took me here.  I was very introverted, even anti-social when I first came here, but I started to enjoy communicating on this site.

 

I'm currently single and fairly well adjusted.  I always say that I've always done my own thing and that is certainly true with my sexuality and gender.  I never resented being male, but I was never interested in behaving in a masculine way.  I just never cared about it.  And because of this, my counselor said that I really didn't have any major hangups about my gender.  I desired gender transition and she encouraged me to explore it and wrote a letter approving me for HRT.

 

If I did not contact her, I don't know what I would have done.  The first therapist I saw seemed like she was trying to scare me out of it.  I felt that she was actually a little rude to me, but I took what I could from her.  So I guess my current GT isn't technically the first one I came out to.  I keep forgetting about that first experience.

 

The transition thing is definitely very scary and my GT has been there helping me though it.  She's someone to talk with about the changes I'm going through.  Once I started HRT and came out to everyone two months later, the fear totally went away and that is a huge relief.  GT and HRT are definitely the foundation of this experience.  I had my doubts about HRT, but boy was I wrong!  HRT is wonderful for me.  I like how my GT said in the beginning that people who transition learn some interesting things.  I like the intellectual side of transitioning and how the hormones change the way I think.  A year ago I was scared of losing my male sexuality and it turns out that for me, that was the best part!  I'm not obsessed with passing as female.  I enjoy people calling me "she" even if they know I'm trans.  I assume that everyone knows that I'm transfeminine.  People are really respectful in Portland.  I just got back from the music store where I wore my heels in the snow to get some work done on my bass.  It really is groovy to feel accepted being any way I want to be.

 

Getting out of your comfort zone isn't easy.  It's good for making an interesting story though.  Enjoy the journey!

 

Hugs!

-Lydia

[Ivy]

10 hours ago, Lydia_R said:

The transition thing is definitely very scary

Yeah, it is.

It is not something we do on a whim.

[Davie]

On 6/4/2022 at 12:31 PM, Mmindy said:

I think what helps me the most when I'm in therapy is: I get to verbalize the things in my head and heart. It seems like saying them, and hearing them to a real person, in person, lifts a huge burden off my being. It also helps me understand and hopefully build the proper context to explain to my family what's really going on with me. I've also received additional information about support groups, and activities where I can be me, in a non judgemental setting.

Yes, this is how it's worked for me, too. A big part of my coming out is joining groups of trans/non-binary people and getting to know them. My therapist this and is open to any progress or topics I need to talk about. She helps me to make progress week-by-week and day-by-day.

[LaurenA]

I've been with the same therapist for several years.  Originally it was about substance abuse and depression.  Then during one session she suggested that the reason I was depressed was that I was afraid to admit to myself that I was trans.  She introduced me to a doctor in the same practice who put me on Estradiol right away.  It's been several years now and the changes I've experienced have been minimal, both physical and emotional.  It also didn't lower my levels of depression.  It's gotten though we've covered all the bases and there isn't much else to talk about.  In the mean time I went through a major depressive cycle including ideations.   I knew things were wrong and checked myself into a psychiatric ward rather than a substance abuse ward.  There I was prompted to talk about feeling and reasons for them, rather than the substance abuse issue.  When I got out I started with day long PHP group sessions where we were taught techniques to handle negative emotions and how to handle them.  Through the techniques I learned how to put those things that depressed me in a frame of mind that made them be less a driver of my emotions.  I like to say that I've acquired tools to help me rewrite my inner narrative.

 

I still think my therapist isn't much help in the place that I am now.  I'm thinking I need one now that can be more of a mentor and a guide as I go down the path of transition.  I do have a NP in an inclusion clinic in the hospital complex.  I think I should talk to her about  finding a therapist in the clinic.  It's going to be hard giving up the familiar and move on to something new but with the insights I've learned about myself I think it's time.

 

Not sure how off topic this was but I guess I just wanted to tell somebody else about my journey.