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Men are idiots.


Red_Lauren.

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Today a male friend of over 15 years sent me a meme why his single, and I responded back well I have breast and im single. He respondeds back well you should have people lined up for you then. I'm like yea im ugly, and said he has the same issue. After that it all went down hill. 

 

Honestly he's a friend. I dont expect him to say im good looking, but i was feeling good about how I looked. I just got a hair cut, and was wearing make-up for the first time in a while, but he didn't have to say that. I'll attach a pic from this morning for reference.

20220627_220155.jpg

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36 minutes ago, WillowA113 said:

You’re not ugly! 

I know I'm not ugly. I get it he was trying to be funny, but when you compare me to two black dudes doing drag for a movie. Then take 10 minute's to respond back to what I said. All while never saying sorry. That is what broke me. 

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@Red_Lauren., you are beautiful. Beauty comes from within, and is a reflection of the soul. For the record, you have beautiful eyes and hair and the purple top works well with your skin tone.

 

And, your "friend" was being cruel. First of all, he should have apologized. Second, if he was indeed your friend, he shouldn't have said it in the first place.

 

Hugs

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  • Forum Moderator

In this case your "friend" a man was certainly an idiot.  

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

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I'm sorry this friend said that to you. Could be he's single not bc he's ugly (note, I have no idea what he looks like), but rather due to his obvious emotional immaturity. It's his problem and loss that he can't get over how you used to look such that instead of seeing the gorgeous woman that you are, he only compares you to a masked man in drag. His arrested development is further demonstrated by his light gas lighting (paraphrasing) "hey, you're the one who said you're ugly, not me." He's clearly someone you're not going to get validation from. But rest assured, it's because of his shortcomings, not yours. 

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23 minutes ago, Jaycie said:

Male friendships pale in comparison to a good girl friend, 

Truer words were never spoken.

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5 hours ago, Marcie Jensen said:

@Red_Lauren., you are beautiful. Beauty comes from within, and is a reflection of the soul. For the record, you have beautiful eyes and hair and the purple top works well with your skin tone.

 

And, your "friend" was being cruel. First of all, he should have apologized. Second, if he was indeed your friend, he shouldn't have said it in the first place.

 

Hugs

Thanks. My hair lady, and a former boss also said the same thing about the top. As for him saying he's sorry. He's a manly man. I know im never going to get a sorry from him. Even I knew as a man. If I said some thing stupid to woman in my past life. Hey everyone dose. I would say im sorry. As for saying I'm ugly. I can take being called ugly. I'm not that sensitive, but when I'm being compared to two men doing drag. That is what pissed me off. 

4 hours ago, Charlize said:

In this case your "friend" a man was certainly an idiot.  

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Yep. I worked with a lot of men in my life. There has been many times. That they have said stupid stuff, and I have said how are you married. 

4 hours ago, Jandi said:

You look fine.

Guys can be idiots.

Can be? 

4 hours ago, Vidanjali said:

I'm sorry this friend said that to you. Could be he's single not bc he's ugly (note, I have no idea what he looks like), but rather due to his obvious emotional immaturity. It's his problem and loss that he can't get over how you used to look such that instead of seeing the gorgeous woman that you are, he only compares you to a masked man in drag. His arrested development is further demonstrated by his light gas lighting (paraphrasing) "hey, you're the one who said you're ugly, not me." He's clearly someone you're not going to get validation from. But rest assured, it's because of his shortcomings, not yours. 

He really not a bad looking man. Again not my type. He dose treat woman with respect for the most part. I'll give him that. Like you said. He just says stupid things a lot. I also know he dosn't care about gay/trans stuff. I've know him well enough to know he could care less about a person's sexual or gender choices. He hasn't even known about my transition for a year yet, and we really don't talk about. As we don't see eachother in person. Because he's a trucker. I think if he saw me in person. It might be a lot different l.

3 hours ago, Jaycie said:

I think you're a beautiful woman and men are idiots 9 times out of 10. Male friendships pale in comparison to a good girl friend, I hope he sees that what he said was wrong and apologizes!!

I still have male friends because I need a bit of testerone in my life. As munch as my female friends have tried to be into my interests. They just aren't into cars, or other male interest. Plus if a male friend want to hang out. It means a i can wear sweats, a over sized t shirt, and no make-up. Hanging out with the girls means going out in public. A hour of prep time, etc.

 

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15 hours ago, Red_Lauren. said:

Today a male friend of over 15 years sent me a meme why his single, and I responded back well I have breast and im single. He respondeds back well you should have people lined up for you then. I'm like yea im ugly, and said he has the same issue. After that it all went down hill. 

 

Honestly he's a friend. I dont expect him to say im good looking, but i was feeling good about how I looked. I just got a hair cut, and was wearing make-up for the first time in a while, but he didn't have to say that. I'll attach a pic from this morning for reference.

20220627_220155.jpg

20220627_220423.jpg

20220627_100812.jpg

😍

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11 hours ago, SheenaT said:

You are beautiful and I agree men can be really insensitive pigs!

Thanks..

 

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Of course they are idiots.  Keep in mind they can only see in about eight or nine colors: black, white, red, yellow, orange, blue, green, purple, camouflage and plaid. That speaks volumes. LOL.

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2 minutes ago, Marcie Jensen said:

Of course they are idiots.  Keep in mind they can only see in about eight or nine colors: black, white, red, yellow, orange, blue, green, purple, camouflage and plaid. That speaks volumes. LOL.

👍

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3 hours ago, Marcie Jensen said:

Of course they are idiots.  Keep in mind they can only see in about eight or nine colors: black, white, red, yellow, orange, blue, green, purple, camouflage and plaid. That speaks volumes. LOL.

Used to be, I only saw shades of black, gray, tan, some red. Since realizing who I really am, I've discovered so many new colors, I need my daughter's help figuring out what goes with what. Never paid purple any mind, except when my older daughter wanted that for her bedroom walls. Now I'm sitting here wearing a lavender skirt. Heavenly.

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3 hours ago, Hannah Renee said:

Never paid purple any mind, except when my older daughter wanted that for her bedroom walls. 

When they were young, ages 12 and 8, respectively, and I was deployed, my girls did virtually the same. One wanted purple walls and the other wanted orange. The ex let them get away with it, and allowed them to paint the rooms themselves. The got paint everywhere, including the original hardwood floors. It was a mess to paint over and refinish the floors when we sold teh place.

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22 minutes ago, Marcie Jensen said:

When they were young, ages 12 and 8, respectively, and I was deployed, my girls did virtually the same. One wanted purple walls and the other wanted orange. The ex let them get away with it, and allowed them to paint the rooms themselves. The got paint everywhere, including the original hardwood floors. It was a mess to paint over and refinish the floors when we sold teh place.

Ouch

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You are beautiful! Don't let some idiot make you feel bad. ❤️

 

I think it boils down to the way men are brought up. Sensitivity isn't really taught...though I've met quite a few sensitive men. My husband has his sensitive moments, but can still be an insensitive jerk about things that require sensitivity. And he told me the main character of my story (a cisgender man) wasn't realistic because he was too emotional. Like...excuse me? I've seen you cry over the smallest things, my dear. Don't tell me men aren't emotional.

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1 hour ago, NashySlashy said:

I think it boils down to the way men are brought up. Sensitivity isn't really taught...though I've met quite a few sensitive men. My husband has his sensitive moments, but can still be an insensitive jerk about things that require sensitivity. And he told me the main character of my story (a cisgender man) wasn't realistic because he was too emotional. Like...excuse me? I've seen you cry over the smallest things, my dear. Don't tell me men aren't emotional.

That's a Great Truth. As a piece of historical trivia, the Normans who conquered England, Sicily, about a third of France (aka: Normandy), and led the First Crusade to seize a kingdom in the Levant as well as Jerusalem, would not trust a man who refused to cry. They claimed that it was only a coward who refused to show his emotions. Just sayin'...

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1 hour ago, Marcie Jensen said:

That's a Great Truth. As a piece of historical trivia, the Normans who conquered England, Sicily, about a third of France (aka: Normandy), and led the First Crusade to seize a kingdom in the Levant as well as Jerusalem, would not trust a man who refused to cry. They claimed that it was only a coward who refused to show his emotions. Just sayin'...

I have always been extremely sensitive and emotional. 😉

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45 minutes ago, SheenaT said:

I have always been extremely sensitive and emotional. 😉

Me as well.

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On 6/29/2022 at 10:23 AM, Marcie Jensen said:

Of course they are idiots.  Keep in mind they can only see in about eight or nine colors: black, white, red, yellow, orange, blue, green, purple, camouflage and plaid. That speaks volumes. LOL.

That's one thing I have noticed with my transition. I see more vibrant colors. Not in every shade, but I understand what woman sorta see now. 

4 hours ago, NashySlashy said:

You are beautiful! Don't let some idiot make you feel bad. ❤️

 

I think it boils down to the way men are brought up. Sensitivity isn't really taught...though I've met quite a few sensitive men. My husband has his sensitive moments, but can still be an insensitive jerk about things that require sensitivity. And he told me the main character of my story (a cisgender man) wasn't realistic because he was too emotional. Like...excuse me? I've seen you cry over the smallest things, my dear. Don't tell me men aren't emotional.

Yea I spent a life time around manly men. I spent a life time in the metal fab world. I noticed around 10 years ago. As the first gen of baby boomers retired. That it was getting better. Then as the second generation of them are coming into retirement now. Its far less manly, but my god are the new kids overly sensitive. You have to remember my generation was the last to grow up with out a filter, a pc world, and not getting trophies for ever thing. They don't have thick skin, and make one joke, and you are in the office.

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