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Finances


Lydia_R

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I chose to delay HRT a month ago because of finances.  I felt it would be an opening of Pandora's Box.  Then a few weeks later I found myself spending $1,800 on a new water heater.

 

I want to go the whole 9 yards with transitioning.  I want to pay for it completely out of pocket.  I have a career that will support this, but that doesn't mean it's going to be easy.  I've recently started aggressively paying off my debt and mortgage.  I can't allow transitioning to cut into my debt payments.  It's simply non-negotiable.  I would have missed my target last month had I started HRT because of the whole water heater business.  I just don't feel I'm financially ready to start.  But I am thinking about the best way to make the finances work.

 

The problem with HRT is that once I start, there is no stopping.  It'll be a constant drag on my finances.  So the plan I came up with is to wait another 6 months here to build up an emergency fund.  Then I like the idea of doing electrolysis 2x a month.  It'll be slow, but it will be a manageable monthly payment.  Then I'll start HRT somewhere in the middle of my electrolysis process.  While all this is going on, I should be able to save $500/month for surgeries.  I should be able to get bottom surgery around the time that my house is paid off in 5 years.

 

When I first got the idea to transition, I thought that I would wait until retirement (about 8 years).  Then I got excited about it and moved up the timeline.  Now I'm settling into the idea of this 5 year timeline.  I've honestly never saved up for anything in my life.  I am persistent and stubborn though!  I think I can do this.  It may be hard to spend the saved money on surgery though.  At that point, my house will be paid off, but it will likely deplete all my money.  But my finances should snap back quickly with all the money I was spending on the mortgage going into savings.

 

In the meantime, I'm enjoying spending a little more money on clothing.  Again, if I had started HRT, my clothing budget would have been strained.  I'm still building up a women's wardrobe here.  I am having a lot of fun with it!

 

If anyone is wondering how I'll be broke in 5 years and then retire in 8 years...  Well, it's really a semi-retirement at that point.  I have a lucrative 5 hour/week gig that will pay for all my expenses if my house is paid off.  With 3 years of saving, the side gig, social security and the possibility of a medium-small windfall, I should be able to make it to a frugal semi-retirement or better in 8 years.  I am admittedly a little sick of working.  I'm hoping that I'll feel better about things once the house is close to being paid off.  It's not really working, but the long hours that's such a drag.  I had to increase how much I'm working to make all this happen.  If I hadn't done that, I wouldn't have my house paid off until I'm 75!  I'm paying off the 30 year mortgage 18 years early.  5 years of work here to pay off the house is mandatory.  After that, I could survive on the high paying gig and do contracting work off and on.  That way I could work hard for 6 months and then take 6 months of just doing the 5 hour/week gig.  Or I could just continue with the full time job if I'm not too burned out.

 

We'll see.  Right now it's Sunday night at 11:47pm and my alarm rings at 4am.  But I did get good rest over the weekend.  And I worked for 4 hours today.  I am in the thick of it.  I'm holding up though.

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Running some numbers:

 

HRT $230 x 12 months x 30 years = $82,800

 

Blood Tests $1,000/year x 30 years = $30,000

 

Bottom Surgery = $30,000

 

Electrolysis $150 x 100 sessions = $15,000

 

Total: $157,800

 

Probably add another $10,000 or $20,000 for other surgeries.

 

I've been casually thinking of this type of transition being $100,000.  I guess it is more than that.  And this is not accounting for inflation.  I think that if I could pay for the bulk of this on my own, then having health insurance doing the long term HRT would probably be something I could accept.  I have been paying into Medicare my whole life.

 

The electrolysis sessions I've been researching are $100 for a normal session and $175 for a genital session.  Some stories I've read mention about 2 years of weekly appointments, so this is how I came up with that ballpark figure.  I have a hard time believing that bottom surgery would only be $25,000.

 

The initial blood test I got for HRT was about $700.  That was a pretty comprehensive test, so maybe my $1,000 yearly figure is high.  The HRT and blood test numbers illustrate the effect of reoccurring charges.  It's easy to think that HRT is the least expensive part of this equation when it is actually the most expensive part of it.  And this is estimating that I only live to 81.

 

This is way beyond buying a fancy car, or two!  But I am pretty thrifty in other aspects of my life.  A couple years ago I was able to rebuild the frame that holds the glass in one of the windows in my house by spending a few hours making fancy cuts with my table saw on two 2x4's.  Total cost was $6.  That could have easily cost $1,000 to replace that window.  It turned out excellent and I'm really proud of the work I did.  I don't think I'll go DIY with bottom surgery though 😀

 

And last year I replaced a good chunk of my hardwood floor and subfloor around the toilet in my bathroom.  I certainly saved a ton of money on that job and it turned out great as well.

 

Oh, and this is not accounting for GT.  I spent a couple thousand on GT this year.  My counselor seems to think I have my head on straight about this and feels that I don't need excessive counseling.  She may be right.  My personal situation does make doing a transition easy.  It certainly is a wild decision to decide to spend this amount of money.  But I would rather spend the money on transitioning than buying a fancy car or upgrading my house.  I will certainly have to work a few more years to do this and that could be a drag.  I'll retire soon enough though.  Even with this, my career is 80% complete.

 

If I go on and on here, on this site, it's because this is a crazy decision.  That's what is so hard about this.  And that craziness actually appeals to me.  I've always been on the fringe.

 

I'm taking it one day at a time though.  I've spent enough money on this effort this year.  I can't take on the financial burden of this for a while.  It's more about security than the numbers themselves.  As hard of a time I have with this concept, this is a retirement thing for me.  It's hard to be patient about this.  But at the same time, I don't know if it would be as sweet if it were easy.

 

And so the rat race continues...

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27 minutes ago, Lydia_R said:

Running some numbers:

 

HRT $230 x 12 months x 30 years = $82,800

 

Blood Tests $1,000/year x 30 years = $30,000

 

Bottom Surgery = $30,000

 

Electrolysis $150 x 100 sessions = $15,000

 

Total: $157,800

 

Probably add another $10,000 or $20,000 for other surgeries.

 

I've been casually thinking of this type of transition being $100,000.  I guess it is more than that.  And this is not accounting for inflation.  I think that if I could pay for the bulk of this on my own, then having health insurance doing the long term HRT would probably be something I could accept.  I have been paying into Medicare my whole life.

 

The electrolysis sessions I've been researching are $100 for a normal session and $175 for a genital session.  Some stories I've read mention about 2 years of weekly appointments, so this is how I came up with that ballpark figure.  I have a hard time believing that bottom surgery would only be $25,000.

 

The initial blood test I got for HRT was about $700.  That was a pretty comprehensive test, so maybe my $1,000 yearly figure is high.  The HRT and blood test numbers illustrate the effect of reoccurring charges.  It's easy to think that HRT is the least expensive part of this equation when it is actually the most expensive part of it.  And this is estimating that I only live to 81.

 

This is way beyond buying a fancy car, or two!  But I am pretty thrifty in other aspects of my life.  A couple years ago I was able to rebuild the frame that holds the glass in one of the windows in my house by spending a few hours making fancy cuts with my table saw on two 2x4's.  Total cost was $6.  That could have easily cost $1,000 to replace that window.  It turned out excellent and I'm really proud of the work I did.  I don't think I'll go DIY with bottom surgery though 😀

 

And last year I replaced a good chunk of my hardwood floor and subfloor around the toilet in my bathroom.  I certainly saved a ton of money on that job and it turned out great as well.

 

Oh, and this is not accounting for GT.  I spent a couple thousand on GT this year.  My counselor seems to think I have my head on straight about this and feels that I don't need excessive counseling.  She may be right.  My personal situation does make doing a transition easy.  It certainly is a wild decision to decide to spend this amount of money.  But I would rather spend the money on transitioning than buying a fancy car or upgrading my house.  I will certainly have to work a few more years to do this and that could be a drag.  I'll retire soon enough though.  Even with this, my career is 80% complete.

 

If I go on and on here, on this site, it's because this is a crazy decision.  That's what is so hard about this.  And that craziness actually appeals to me.  I've always been on the fringe.

 

I'm taking it one day at a time though.  I've spent enough money on this effort this year.  I can't take on the financial burden of this for a while.  It's more about security than the numbers themselves.  As hard of a time I have with this concept, this is a retirement thing for me.  It's hard to be patient about this.  But at the same time, I don't know if it would be as sweet if it were easy.

 

And so the rat race continues...

Seems like you’ve been thinking about this a lot. The numbers are high but I know about something that could bring it down a little. 
Leaving the house for electrolysis is completely unnecessary. You can do it at home for so much cheaper.
https://ketchbeauty.com/

Just buy one of these. Its super cheap in the long run and its made specifically for trans women! Hope this can help! 

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  • Admin

Lydia, I am not understanding why you want to pay for everything out of pocket.  Don't Oregon insurance companies cover HRT and bottom surgery?  I also think your HRT expenses are not realistic.  Even before I got insurance to cover it, I got my monthly T-blockers and Estradiol for about $30/month.  Patches or shots are probably more, but not that much more.  With insurance its probably $10-20/month total.  With insurance, blood tests should be free or very low cost.  On the other hand, your figures for bottom surgery are probably accurate, unless insurance covers it.  BA surgery and FFS, if needed, would also be expensive, but not everyone needs or wants it.

 

Carolyn Marie

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Thanks for your input Carolyn Marie.  I really do want to start a discussion here about costs.

 

I honestly have virtually never paid a health insurance premium in my life.  I was in the military for most of the 90's and have been using my VA benefit ever since.  I've spent most of the last 15 years contracting.  The VA health benefit has been great at allowing me to survive as a contractor without paying health insurance premiums.

 

I'm not retired from the military though.  I'm officially declared a low priority veteran.  They have taken great care of me and I don't want to abuse that relationship.

 

I have certainly paid out of pocket for medical things over the years.  I paid about $10,000 to have all my dental fillings replaced with ceramic onlays.  I've had some mental health things come up that had some costs to them as well.

 

I kind of enjoy being a freelancer (I am salaried and freelancing now) and paying out of pocket for things.  After all, if I'm not paying for it, then someone else is.  And if insurance is paying for it, then they have to get paid on top of that as well.  I simply don't like the idea of anyone else paying for my transition costs.  For me, this is a choice, not a necessity.

 

I did get a prescription for estradiol patches and T-blockers.  I called the pharmacy to inquire about price and it was $230.  I believe that I did confirm with them that it was for a one month supply.  It is true that I might be able to get the VA to pay for this.  I did serve my country for two tours of duty.  I'd be pretty reluctant to go that route though.  I can get behind the VA doing my blood tests though.

 

As I eluded to before, I have of course been paying into medicare my whole life.  I certainly don't have a problem with using that benefit for HRT when I turn 65.  That's a ways off though.  And that will have a copay as well.  The whole part D thing.

 

I seem to focus more on bottom surgery than anything else.  I found a nice bikini with a padded bra that I wear for underwear every day now  My breasts are large for a male.  With the padded bra and dresses that are cut to highlight the breasts, I'm pretty satisfied with the look of my chest.  I'm always surprised when I see the hint of cleavage!  It's really a trick of the clothing, isn't it?  I may not like it if my breasts got much bigger.

 

I'd love to get rid of some of my midsection.  I weigh 135 though.  I'm working on losing a little more weight and I'm getting serious about doing sit-ups every day.  HRT probably won't do much for that though, right?

 

Larger hips/thinghs is the same thing with breasts.  A little would be nice, but if they got a lot bigger, it would be worse.

 

The emotional effects might be nice.  I'd probably enjoy that.

 

I kind of like being feminine around the house and being a little ambiguous when I leave the house.  I'm probably pretty low on the gender dysphoric scale.  In general, I'd rather look sexy feminine than masculine.  I see all men as looking like ugly bull dogs now.  I probably look ridiculous to a lot of men, but that's their problem!

 

The sensible way for me to save costs seems to be to ditch HRT.  I think that's the most bang for my buck and what would make me the happiest.  I have a slender figure and it's easy to find sexy women's clothing that fits.  I love dressing up like that at home, but it just isn't appropriate to wear that outside of the house.  No women are wearing things like that to the grocery store!  About 50% of the time, I wear my women's athletic clothing when I'm out and about.  Sometimes I'll wear my sexy black dresses to go to fast food.  I think I look good in them.  The drive thru espresso stand has a rainbow everyone welcome sign out front.

 

If HRT had mild effects, I think I would like it.  If it doesn't, I think I would hate it.  The feminine traits in my family are not desirable.  Above all, I want to be thin and sexy.  And healthy.  Gender is secondary to that.  I'd look a lot better doing the bikini barista thing if I had bottom surgery.  I think I'd like the kinky sexual side of that as well.

 

I know I'm pretty stubborn about the theoretical side of medical costs.  I'm not necessarily looking for a way around the costs.  I'm sharing my journey.  I'm certainly interested in other people's journey as well.  This financial thing is a part of this experience and I'm just starting on that path.  I'm being cautious.  I absolutely do not want to be putting this on a credit card.  I've done too much of that in my life.  I won't jeopardize my retirement either.  I absolutely have to slow this process down and save for it.  I want to be a part of this community and continue to grow in this direction.  It's going to be a little frustrating waiting.

 

I've got GT this week.  We've been on a 2 month break, so it will be good to bring this stuff up in our session.

 

DIY Electrolysis 😀

 

with love,

-Lydia

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9 hours ago, Lydia_R said:

I'm not retired from the military though.  I'm officially declared a low priority veteran.  They have taken great care of me and I don't want to abuse that relationship.

I'm in this position also.  And the VA has been good to me.  I do get my HRT from them with a co-pay, it's not too much.  

 

VA does not currently cover botton surgery.  But I'm not sure I would pursue it if they did.  My junk doesn't bother me terribly - or it hadn't.  Lately I'm feeling it more.  But I'm also older (early 70's), have no partner, and considering all the prep & recovery time it doesn't seem practical for me.  And I don't have the funds either.  

 

I live fem full time now.  It's been several years since I intentionally presented as male.  As I have said elsewhere, I think my age helps.  Old hags don't have to look sexy LOL.

 

I have some breasts from the hormones, and I like how they feel and reenforce my identity.  I would be extremely upset to loose my HRT.  I would even consider black market if it came to that.  But that's just me.

 

You seem to have though things out pretty well.  Good luck.

 

 

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😀 Nice post Jandi!  That's cool we have this VA connection.

 

* I wrote like 3 different posts here and then deleted them.

 

I think I would enjoy HRT.  And I may use the VA benefit for it.  We'll see.  I'm going to try electrolysis next.  I'm super curious about it!  I've been in a good routine lately with shaving my body once a week.  That works well for me.

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On 7/17/2022 at 5:45 PM, Carolyn Marie said:

 I also think your HRT expenses are not realistic.  Even before I got insurance to cover it, I got my monthly T-blockers and Estradiol for about $30/month.  Patches or shots are probably more, but not that much more.  With insurance its probably $10-20/month total.  With insurance, blood tests should be free or very low cost.  On the other hand, your figures for bottom surgery are probably accurate, unless insurance covers it.  BA surgery and FFS, if needed, would also be expensive, but not everyone needs or wants it.

 

Carolyn Marie

I agree, Carolyn. You are spot on. Even if insurance doesn't cover prescriptions for things like estradiol, entities such as GoodRx can keep the prices down. This includes things like T-blockers and Progesterone--both in the price range of about $30/month with GoodRx. Additionally, there are entitles such as Plume that take care of blood tests as part of their monthly fee.

 

And, most insurance covers GCS nowadays--this includes the VA and Federal employee insurance plans.

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1 hour ago, Marcie Jensen said:

And, most insurance covers GCS nowadays--this includes the VA…

I think the VA is only considering it at this point.   And expect that could change under another administration.  They do do HRT though.

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1 hour ago, Marcie Jensen said:

Patches or shots are probably more, but not that much more.  With insurance its probably $10-20/month total

 

Learning the ins and outs of patch pricing took awhile for me to sort out.  My insurance does not cover it.  I started at my local CVS, who charged $78 per month for patches.  What did I know?  I assumed it would be pretty much the same elsewhere.  Wrong!  I soon discovered that my gender clinic in Boston, Fenway -- which also includes a pharmacy -- charged $50 per month, mailed to my home.  Then, the shocker -- my doctor had the prescription changed so that 3 months were filled at a time -- and Fenway's pharmacy charged the same amount, $50, for **three months** of patches. mailed to me  No one told me about this being a great way to save money; I simply had to learn through experience.

 

So, call around various pharmacies, especially those associated with a university or gender clinic in your state.  They're less likely to overcharge.

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1 hour ago, Astrid said:

my doctor had the prescription changed so that 3 months were filled at a time -- and Fenway's pharmacy charged the same amount, $50, for **three months** of patches.

 

Yes, dispensing fees are a big part of every prescription, so getting several months' supply at once will save money.  (They must have some other discount working as well for the price to be the same.) 

 

When covid started, they were worried about supplies of medication being interrupted, so the pharmacy imposed a one-month limit on prescriptions.  Paying three dispensing fees in three months instead of one just about doubled my cost.  I got them to switch it back to three months at a time as soon as they allowed it.

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Thanks for all the good information everyone!  The price I got from my local pharmacy is obviously pretty high and there are options to bring it down.  As it turns out, I'm glad I'm slowing down this process a little bit.  I do feel like I have to build up some savings before this is something I can afford to do.

 

I was wearing my women's active wear to the fast food drive thru the other day and I did not get a "sir" or a "ma'am".  I got a "are you a senior?"  And I felt pretty good with that.  That is reality.

 

After my GT appointment yesterday, I got to thinking that my transition situation is pretty easy.  I don't have family complications.  I have a good career that can pay for just about anything I want to do (not without sacrifice of course).  My GT honestly questions what I need counseling for?  Of course I need it as part of medically transitioning and I do like checking in with my counselors.

 

$50 x 12 months x 30 years = $18,000

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    • Abigail Genevieve
      Thanks.  What I do as a man is what a woman would do if she were a man.  There is just something feminine about the way I act as a man.  It's not that being a woman is actually better, or something to aspire to, but it is just that I am one, while not being one.   If beating my head bloody to get rid off this stupid dysphoria would fix it I would find the nearest wall, but I know that if I did that, when I woke up, it would still be there.   If I did not have this struggle I would be someone else and I would be less of a person than I am.  They say an oak tree growing in an open field is far stronger than one in a forest.  The storms come and go and I stand.   This forum is the first time I have interacted with other people struggling with the same struggle and parallel struggles. It helps.
    • Ashley0616
      I'm sorry! :( Hopefully something better will come up
    • Ashley0616
      Thank you! Did great with the kids
    • Sally Stone
      That's me too, Mae.  I don't think it's me as much as it is the camera (that's my story anyway).  Cameras hate me.  I never met one that liked me.  I often wish I was photogenic; sadly, not so much.   However, you look terrific in that selfie! 
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