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Are you living your authentic life?


Heather Shay

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@ZelaireYour friend gives such good advice. As long as you have other people who are okay with you, or even a safe space-with just you, if that's the case- then you can live your life as authentically as possible. And this thing about "demanding" everyone to live their authentic lives, I can understand your friend's frustration. I've heard someone say the same thing once about living your life no matter what other people think. That's the thing: you may feel good about it, but there's always someone else who won't honor it. Really, in order to be authentic in the real world is to do so safely and ambiguously so as not to draw the ire of others. Perhaps this is due to my outlook on the world, but as of right now, it can be tough to be who you want to be. Unconsciously, there are still things done that make it hard to move forward.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I'm getting there.  I am a woman at work.  My wife's family all know who I am and I'm going to a wedding in a dress next month.  I'm also coming out to my doctor next month and I'm planning to talk to him about HRT.

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I am living more as my authentic self now than any other time in my life. I do what makes me happy, and stopped doing what others wanted. It has taken many years, but I am very comfortable now in who I am, I am open to my few friends about who I am, and I am just true to that and try not to worry any more about what others think about it. For years I had to hide how I felt in myself gender-wise, my sexuality and romantic orientation, and now I embrace it all.

 

As I continue on my journey through life, I fully intend to continue to embrace who I am and continue to do what makes me happiest.

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I am not living my authentic life. I am living my only life.

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From my experience when on HRT it has changed your interests and likes beyond how I thought it would.  It’s incredible to think how strong and powerful the change of hormones in your body align to your mind. 
 

like others have said your goals and wishes do change throughout the journey.

 

anyway I’m new here so hello to everyone 😊👋🏻

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8 hours ago, Bridget said:

From my experience when on HRT it has changed your interests and likes beyond how I thought it would.  It’s incredible to think how strong and powerful the change of hormones in your body align to your mind. 
 

like others have said your goals and wishes do change throughout the journey.

 

anyway I’m new here so hello to everyone 😊👋🏻

Hrt has been amazing for me, far far better than I ever thought before. 

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Since I came out fully to everyone the day that I started HRT in October of last year, I have only found that by living my true life that I have been happier and more pleased with myself and things around me. I give in to no one as I am now me.

My birth certificate, name change and appearance now says what and who I am.

My only curse is facial hair still. :(

I shall overcome that too.

 

Have a nice day all.

 

Big Canadian Hug

JoniSteph

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1 hour ago, JoniSteph said:

Since I came out fully to everyone the day that I started HRT in October of last year, I have only found that by living my true life that I have been happier and more pleased with myself and things around me. I give in to no one as I am now me.

My birth certificate, name change and appearance now says what and who I am.

My only curse is facial hair still. :(

I shall overcome that too.

 

Have a nice day all.

 

Big Canadian Hug

JoniSteph

Yes we can overcome. We can find it difficult, even hurtful, but every problem has a solution unless it theoretically or physically impossible. There are even organization who gives grants for electrolysis. I am not sure how much they give, but it's a start. And some things just take time 

 (https://www.pointofpride.org/electrolysis-support-fund

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I'm getting closer to it every day. Even me a year ago was not living nearly as authentically as I am now, it's crazy to look back on. Finally using my name and pronouns in all aspects, which is even crazier. Still working on starting my medical transition, started talking with my therapist about starting HRT eventually & also got a dysphoria diagnosis (required for my insurance to cover anything). Hoping to maybe start t sometime in the summer, but we'll see

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On 9/4/2022 at 10:12 AM, Davie said:

Yesterday I told two of my male cis friends I was going on an Audubon hike with my trans group. They asked to come along. I said: "Sure, but you'll have to look trans." One second they looked appalled, the next they were competing with each other to outline which dress they'd wear with what hat and shoes—and wigs! So funny!

Totally good natured, if a little stereotypical, but liberated, open.

— Davie

Your friends are very silly, it's adorable. Honestly, they can just dress normal for comfort. Just let them get their nails done and try some modest make-up w. sparkles. Hope you all have fun.

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  • 2 weeks later...

It's something that is still falling into place bit by bit. I've grown in so many ways since I decided to transition, I'm still being surprised by what my authentic life looks like.

 

The old me struggled and was constantly weighed down by poor mental health. Now I've got a career and stuff I never thought I was good enough for. It's overwhelming at times. I'm not used to being 'normal'!

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1 hour ago, Girl From Mars said:

It's something that is still falling into place bit by bit. I've grown in so many ways since I decided to transition, I'm still being surprised by what my authentic life looks like.

 

The old me struggled and was constantly weighed down by poor mental health. Now I've got a career and stuff I never thought I was good enough for. It's overwhelming at times. I'm not used to being 'normal'!

Yes, there are surprises.

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  • 1 month later...

I think I probably am without any real restrictions. It would have be nice to have been able to have the freedom I have now 30 years ago though, but you can't have everything. 

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    • Mmindy
      Good afternoon and Welcome Ay-la. As you've seen by the responses above, you're in a safe place to be who you really are.   Best wishes, stay positive, and motivated.   Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • Marcie Jensen
      You have all prompted me to do some research. Being of Scottish descent, I went in that direction and learned a bunch of things, some of the most unusual were:   On Christmas eve, the children leave a slice of mince pie and a shot of whisky for Father Christmas.   A rowan twig is often burnt on Christmas to restore good relationships between neighbors, family members and friends.   And, most unusual of all, Christmas wasn't celebrated openly by Scots from 1647 until the 1950s. Originally, this was because of edicts under Cromwell's rule and later the Presbyterian Church of Scotland discouraged the practice of celebrating Christmas. 
    • Hannah Renee
      With respect to the second sentence, my mother treated me and my three siblings - especially me - rather poorly. None of us kept up with her much in adulthood. I moved away from her and my siblings at 13 to live with our dad. 'Tis why I avoided having children until I was 50, when I was "certain" I wouldn't be like her.   She did, however, if even accidentally, I still in me a love of different types of music.
    • Marcie Jensen
      Krampus is another different tradition. I first learned about the character on an episode of General Hospital several years ago.
    • Marcie Jensen
      @miz mirandathank you for adding to the Christmas Traditions list. Again, it's very interesting. As is the story of the actual Saint Nicholas, bishop of Myrna and Bari, the precursor of Santa. I've gotta say, I think I'll pass on the fried caterpillars though.
    • KathyLauren
      LOL.  When I was a kid, there was an even worse variation of it, to the same tune, called "All I want for Christmas is a Beatle."  Click at your own risk... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ozoaBftyjI
    • MaryEllen
      Another oldie but goody       
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      In German traditions, St. Nicholas is accompanied by a an imp or mildly evil fellow named Krampus.  St. Nicholas hands out sweet treats and fruit to good children, leaving the treats in a shoe.  Krampus beats bad children with a stick.  
    • Davie
      SZA's new album, SOS, finally out. " Blind" song. Been a long-time fan since her first demos. 
    • Carolyn Marie
      This was popular when I was a kid.  It sucked then, and it sucks now:  "All I want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth."  Spike Jones and the City Slickers did the first recording of it.     Carolyn Marie
    • Carolyn Marie
    • Abigail Eleanor
      That Yule Cat in Iceland!  I love it! 
    • miz miranda
      some strange Christmas Traditions   Italy: The Christmas Witch In many cultures, Santa Claus is the person that travels around the world and delivers gifts to deserving young boys and girls on Christmas Eve. Kids are told to be good because Santa is watching them and will know if they behave! On Christmas morning, good kids are rewarded with gifts from this iconic figure. But in Italy, there's someone else delivering gifts. Befana is the name of a witch in Italy who is said to travel around Italy on Epiphany Eve (January 5th) to deliver gifts to children all over the country. If the children were good all year, their socks are filled with candy and gifts. But if they were bad? They get nothing but coal.   Iceland: The Yule Cat Animals are a big part of a lot of the mythology and traditions of many countries. In Iceland, there's a special Christmas tradition that involves a very special cat that roams the streets one time per year. But this cat isn't the cute, friendly, four-legged friend that we might imagine roaming the streets of Iceland. According to myths and legends, the Yule Cat is a ferocious creature that wanders around during the winter time and eats anyone who hasn't gotten new clothes to wear on Christmas Eve.   Japan: Kentucky Fried Christmas Many families have a tradition of getting together on holidays like Christmas to enjoy a meal together. Whether it's turkey, ham, or a secret family recipe, enjoying dinner together is a huge part of the holidays for many families. This is also true in Japan! Even though Christmas is celebrated a lot differently and has only started to be celebrated in the past few decades, it's still popular for a lot of people. So, what's the special meal that people eat during Christmas in Japan? KFC! In the 1970s, KFC in Japan started advertising a special campaign during the winter called Kentucky for Christmas. During Christmas, KFC sells a special range of family dinners meant to help people celebrate the holiday together.   South Africa: Fried Caterpillars There are some foods around the world that are slightly strange to people that don't live there. Some of them are surprisingly delicious once you give them a chance, but then there are others that we could never imagine trying. In South Africa, there's one really unusual food that tends to be eaten during the Christmas season. It's fried, crispy, and they say it's delicious. What is it? Fried caterpillars! On Christmas Day, people in South Africa snack on deep-fried caterpillars.
    • Delcina B
      Welcome Ay-la! Glad you're here! Happy for you having your family's support. Hope you find the wonderful support, advice & acceptance here as I have.   Hugs! Delcina 
    • Ivy
      I think this is true.  But I don't think that our core beliefs can't evolve as we grow in knowledge and understanding.  For myself, I had a core "belief" that I used as a lens to interpret my experiences and everything else.  There were times when it took a bit of mental gymnastics to pull it off - which bothered me.   When I was finally forced to drop that, it opened me to be able to interpret my realities in a new way that made a whole lot more sense.   Sure, I'm still looking at things through a lens.  But at least it's my own lens, and that lens can be modified as I grow and learn even more.   This doesn't mean that there is no such thing as "truth" or reality, it's just that we are seeing more of it, and hopefully that, more accurately.   I don't know.  Perhaps there is a time when our reality has to crumble and be rebuilt on a different foundation.  And perhaps it's not a one-time thing.
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