Hi, I'm Rebel

[Rebel]

Ok, a little about me, I'm 56 MtF I've been on HRT for same as 3 years, I come from small town iowa, I was a farm boy that just didn't fit in, back then if you were a farm boy and gay or what ever you pretty much got beat up every day, I avoided that by trying to fit in, but when i was home i would wear the short shorts and wear my hair long and be who i felt i was, My father died when i was in 2nd grade so my mom raised me, she never dated or even wanted to meet a man after my fathers death, I think she figured out i was not all boy but never let on or tried to make me act more like a male, I started cross dressing in my teen years and i felt so natural, i grew my hair to mid back and in the summer when school was out that was what i called the real me time, but on the other hand i was fearless, i raced motercross and i think i was fearless because i wanted to crash and die, i hated that i was a boy, i started cutting on myself, once i even cut the female name i wanted into my thigh, as time when on i still had that death wish in the back of my head and did crazy stuff on motercycles, and cars, i got the reputation of a wild child, after my teen years i got married several time but it never lasted, and I,m married now and i can tell its not going to last long, i came out to my currant wife when we started dating told her i was Trans and she was cool with it or so she said, now two years in shes told me how she cant stand gay or trans people and that i'm stupid and that there are only two genders, she cuts up my clothes and anything she can do to make me a MAN in her eyes, i will NOT give up the fight this is my life, and thats why i picked my female name as Rebel, ive gone though a lot to get to this point and im getting old its now or never so i go against the grain and keep fighting for me and for me to live as me,

Thank for letting me join,

Rebs

[Carolyn Marie]

Welcome to Trans Pulse, Rebel!  I'm glad you found us.  It's a shame you wife couldn't even try to be more supportive, and to vandalize your clothes is just so wrong.  I suppose couples counseling isn't going to be accepted by her, either.

 

Well, you're welcome to vent here all you want, as well as ask questions and contribute to the forums with posts and comments.  We'll be here when you need us.

 

HUGS

 

Carolyn Marie

[Charlize]

Welcome Rebel.  I'm a NJ farm girl and every so often i have ended up driving the tractor in a skirt while loading lumber from our mill.  Just being myself is ac dream come true.  My wife has accepted the change, perhaps in part as we are older.

You are not alone.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[Delcina B]

Welcome @Rebel! Glad you're here! As you said "this is my life," while some of those I love have accepted me, some haven't, my wife, oops, ex-wife is one who didn't. Oddly we seem to get along better now than when we were married. The alternative to taking this journey exploring my gender was self-destruction. I'm glad I made the choice. I hope you find the wonderful support, advice & acceptance here as I have.

 

Hugs!

Delcina 

[Ivy]

Welcome Rebel 

[Davie]

Welcome, Rebel. @RebelThanks for your story. You deserve to be who you are, a survivor,     I think you gave me part of an answer to my teen years. I, too, was a farm boy who took risks in the hay fields and in the football fields . . . until one day—on the first day of practice for a new year, my hands turned my truck left, instead of right into the parking lot. It was like they knew better than I did what I really wanted. They had quit the football team for me. I pulled off the road and cried for joy. My father called me a sissie, but I was free. He called me a sissie but I could tackle an all-state fullback of 225 lbs when I was 115. And free, but not free like I am now. 

💜 Davie