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6 Months and Lots of Changes

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I've been on feminizing HRT for a little over 6 months now.  My life feels radically different than it was before I started.  It's been a huge year of change and I could go on and on about the positive effects which I've done in several other posts in the last few months.


The biggest change for me is social.  I have not been anywhere near this social in over 30 years.  The first thing that cracked the door open was joining this site and posting a few pictures.  For the last three months, I've been doing transgender AA meetings and meetings in town almost every night of the week.  I've found like minded people and acceptance in all of these places.


I got my new driver's license last week and am working on finishing up my name change.  For most of my life, I've been fairly scared about being seen in public.  I now feel more natural and curious when I'm out and about.  Compounding this positive effect was tripling my income last year.


Part of me is wondering if I really want to be this social.  I find it a little hard to have time to myself now and that is completely opposite of where I was last summer.  It seems like a radical change.  Part of me fantasizes about being alone again.  I'm enjoying what I'm doing and like the idea of staying on this path.  I'll probably strike a happy balance in the future.


I've got this funny gray hair right at the top of my forehead tucked in under the other long hairs.  My car mirror tends to accent it and I envision myself having long gray hair.  I like this feminine vision I see in the mirror now.


SRS is a ways off still.  Several years at the earliest.  Unfortunately, a psychiatric medication I am on is making my prolactin levels elevated.  The thought of changing my medications is disturbing.  Right now I'm just doing more blood tests.  I guess the main downside is increased risk of breast cancer.


I'm still adjusting to this big lifestyle change.  I guess I'm just checking in with you all.  With most of the fear and decisions behind me I'm just happy to have made it through and have such an amazing outcome.  I'm free to be the person I always wanted to be.  There was a lot of fear in the way!


Sincerely with many hugs,


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1 hour ago, Lydia_R said:

Part of me is wondering if I really want to be this social.  I find it a little hard to have time to myself now and that is completely opposite of where I was last summer.  It seems like a radical change.  Part of me fantasizes about being alone again.


A wonderful topic to go over with your Gender Therapist, but as you say you are still new, and the feeling of at last being genuine is a heady drink.  I have been doing this for 14 years by now and I feel better with people than I ever did before, and people I was not as comfortable with before HRT do see me as a much more authentic person.  My male was a terrible act.  I have nights like tonight where I had a 1 hr. LGBTQ Community Center Board of Directors meeting, but the rest of tonight is me by myself, although it will be doing some tech work for another group that I am part of, but the people are not around me, just the work they created.  Keeping yourself grounded in your AA program is wonderful, but even there some alone time if it is healthy such as hobbies or exercise (evening walks are wonderful) is important for you to get to know you.

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Wonderful! This is exactly what I hope for when I begin my own HRT Treatment (hopefully soon). I'm so happy for you!

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