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Why such a big target?


Sally Stone

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I do my best to ignore the rhetoric, hate, and marginalization directed towards us, but there are days when I simply want to crawl into a hole to avoid it all.  To date, I haven't actually descended into a hole and instead, I find myself wondering why we have such a big target on our backs.  It's not like we are bad people.  In fact, most of us just want to go through life being who we want to be, living in the skin that makes us most comfortable.  

 

Maybe it's an epiphany of sorts, maybe I've just climbed out from under my proverbial rock, but it's obvious we are a big target because bullies just love the ones who don't fight back.  They feel empowered when they can direct their vitriol at someone knowing that someone won't fight back.  I remember back when I was in junior high.  I was bullied terribly by a pair of classmates for nearly two years.  They both identified me as an easy target because I wouldn't stand up for myself.  I chose to be nonconfrontational.  But two-years is a long time to be bullied and finally, when I couldn't take it any more, I beat the snot out of one of those two bullies.  I only stood up to one of them but they both got my message and neither ever bothered me again.  It just goes to show that bullies are generally nothing more than blowhards and when they realize you are willing to stand up to them, they back down, or they go find someone weaker to prey on.

 

What we are dealing with these days is no different.  Our desire to be left alone, to live quietly without having to be confrontational, unfortunately, has sent the wrong message and made us easy targets.  Okay, I am in no way advocating violence here.  I'm not saying the way to take back our lives we have to punch our detractors in the nose.  What I am saying however, is we need a stronger collective voice.  A voice that delivers the message: "Don't f*** with us.  It's all a matter of having a collective voice that drowns out the bullies. 

 

For most of us, I know our trans situation, our intense desire to fly under the radar, often prevents us from speaking out.  Unfortunately, this is not "the way."  I'm pretty certain that if we want the rhetoric, the hate, and the marginalization to stop, we have to be the ones to step up and make it stop.  Waiting for anyone else to do it for us, is going to a very long wait.       

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  • Admin

I agree wholeheartedly with what you say, @Sally Stone.  Even regarding bullies, I have my own similar experience.  In 9th grade I was in Agriculture Class, and a strong, tall bully starting throwing dirt clods at me.  No reason, I was just a small, weak, easy target.  One day I had had enough, and I walked up to him and told him to stop.  He grabbed my shirt and literally lifted me off the ground.  I didn't flinch, didn't back down, looked him in the eye and told him off in colorful language.  I didn't pop him, but I think he knew I would.  He never bothered me again.

 

Anyway, concerning our trans troubles, the problem isn't just bullies, although that's a big part of it.  it's also the whole political climate, with the far right "base," conspiracy theorists, bloggers, pundits and politicians needing reasons for why things aren't like the mythical "good old days," which they long for.  We are different, easily identifiable (not in just in terms of physical presence, but b/c we also have symbols), and small in numbers.  We, along with Jews, Muslims, homosexuals, even Blacks, are easily "othered."

 

Those are many of the same groups, along with Gypsies, mentally challenged and physically deformed peoples whom the Nazis targeted.  Things won't turn out the same - America is not the same culture, and the players are not the murderous thugs and fascists of the 1930's & 1940's; but there are similar elements.

 

That is why we have to fight like hell politically and in the courts to keep the bullies at bay.  We have an uphill climb, but we will succeed in the long run.  I have to believe that.

 

Sorry for the long rant.

 

Carolyn Marie

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@Sally Stone  We do actually have some folks out in "The Jungle" doing some fighting in ways that do not leave physical injury to be cleaned up, but rather with good service to our communities and the ones who could be hurt badly in both our Trans and Cis friends.  I and another Staff member  here are members of community service organizations, which are doing effective work in legal assistance and community information and entertainment positions.  Participating at your local level in organizations that work with community leaders is a lot of fun and gives the bullies more opposition than they expect.  I have got three cities to cover this year for Pride Proclamation Presentations that let the citizens of those cities know that their elected leaders consider us to be real and HONORABLE members of the community (not to mention that we VOTE as well.).  There is much we can do that is low stress and just some handshaking and being present to remind leaders of our humanity is often successful.   

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"Those are many of the same groups, along with Romany peoples, mentally challenged and physically deformed peoples whom the unhealthy politics targeted".

 

Looking from a distance that's what I am seeing. The former president's rallies looked eerily similar to the unhealthy politics Rallies, pre war. 

It's the same principle - blame them they are different. Hate hate hate! seems to be the policy atm, and not just in the US. 

 

MaybeRob

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