Feeling Good

[Guest Huff]

Hey guys,

I bought a suit for myself for the first time and that feels pretty darn cool. And, actually, I look pretty darn cool in it too. Kind of like just the opposite of how awful and repulsive it was to be forced to wear a strapless dress for my sister's wedding. *shudder* I like finally looking like me and getting to dress appropriately. I never could look in the mirror before because the girl staring back was, well... a girl! Now, I like looking in the mirror. It's actually kind of fun.

I was just thinking that it was neat that I've passed some really huge positive milestones and was wanted to hear some of the milestones other guys have passed in their transition.

MK

[Zufrieden]

Hi Huff:

Thinking back to actual milestones, I can only think of one. In retrospect, it was a great one.

I was always reticent about coming out, but mostly from the viewpoint of "going on record".

I didn't want to say to somebody that I was a transsexual and then have to tell them a year later that I wasn't going through with it.

That isn't actually very well stated, but it's the best I can do.

In July, after 7 months of HRT, I said to myself, "Who am I kidding? I'm never going to stop HRT. I might as well tell everybody."

Admittedly, the first time I came out to somebody was difficult. The next week I joined Laura's Playground.

Now when distant friends email with their news that they're putting a new roof on the garage, I email them back, "Oh, Yeah? Well I..."

The openness and freedom I've gained from the first coming out counts as my milestone.

While the effects of HRT have been the most important change in my life, the gradualness rules them out as a milestone.

Z.

[Guest GoldenKirbichu]

I think when I cut my hair for the first time in eight years.

Just hacked eight inches off of it. It was like someone cutting a weight off my head.

[Guest Sergei]

So many big moments.

Same as Golden, cutting my hair was a big moment. Clipping it from below shoulder length to 7mm made quite a big difference. Although I actually felt quite sad at first. Men can have long hair. Being a student in a music school, where the men have more hair than the women taught me that. But I pass better now.

Changing my name and title legally was also a big moment, and then changing it on all of my documents. Each was a mini victory.

I think the step which excited me most though, and gave me the most pleasure was shaving. I'm not on T yet, and don't really have to shave, but it does masculinise the appearance not to have the light hair that women have on their faces. It just felt so right, the first time I put the cream on my face, and the razor glided across. That was the moment that every doubt I ever had about changing my gender left me. I was 100% sure at that moment I was meant to be male.

Standing to urinate for the first time. Well, getting it right for the first time. It takes practise. Up until now, for the last 2 months I have been using the STP device, but only in the cubical in the mens toilets. A couple of weekends ago I finally found the confidence, and used the urinal for the first time. That felt like a big milestone for me. I phoned my best friend straight after to tell him the news, that's how excited I was.

[Guest GoldenKirbichu]

I've actually shaved a few times. The feeling is quite exhilarating, at least at first. I actually felt giddy the first time I shaved... and it was really early in the morning because I was embarrassed to ask my dad about it. And there I was shaving my semi-beard and feeling giddy. It was pretty obvious what gender identity I have - if I can get excited over shaving chin hairs.

Of course, I cut my thumb open with the razor once. An act of stupidity on my part. NEVER try to wipe hairs off with your thumb. oO;

[Flint]

I suppose i felt kinda good when a girl didn;t know i was trans and she said she fancied me. It felt good cause i obvioulsy looked like convincing male.

And when i first got boxer shorts lol.

[Guest Darrel]

I'm with Sergei! When I cut my hair, it was amazing. Everyone thought it was a stupid, unisex haircut, but I knew better. Even if it doesn't help me pass any better, it certainly makes me feel good. My long hair made my appearance scream 'girl'. Just not my thing. (Plus it's a LOT easier to take care of now!)

Another would be letting my leg hair grow and shaving my facial hair off. Most enjoying thing in the world; I can spend quite a bit in the bathroom, shaving it off. I do it slow just because it gives me such great pleasure.^^

[Guest Mani]

Most important milestone: I finally accepted myself

Other milestones- getting a gender therapist, starting T

Cutting my hair wasn't a milestone because my hair length has always been like a yo-yo.

[Guest GoldenKirbichu]

I think the next milestone for me will be getting over my needle phobia so I can get the blood test so I can start T.

[Guest Sergei]

Another would be letting my leg hair grow and shaving my facial hair off.

Yeah, I liked letting my leg hair grow again. Nothing felt so wrong as shaving it off for all of them years. But that what I was told I was meant to do!!!! When I wore shorts for the first time after letting it grow back it was a great feeling. My legs are really, really hairy as well. My cisgender male friends even get jealous!

[Guest Ryan]

My most important milestone was probably getting a binder about 7 months ago. Since then I have felt so much more confident. I shaved my face a few weeks ago, which was exciting although totally not noticeable at all. And last week I bought my first set of men's formal clothes and wore them to my chorale concert. Some people gave me some kind of funny looks, but I felt more comfortable with myself than I ever did wearing female formal clothes.

My next milestone will probably have to be cutting my hair. I've wanted to cut it for a really long time, but I'm also afraid to because my parents will start asking questions that I don't want to answer yet.

[Guest Sergei]

I shaved my face a few weeks ago, which was exciting although totally not noticeable at all.

Keep going, it definitely thickens up with time even pre T. Somebody actually noticed and commented on my stubble for the first time today. That made me feel really good, another mile stone I guess.

[Guest Alexander]

My milestones were similar.

Buying a binder

Cutting my hair short, when it had never been shorter than my shoulders

Shaving

Being carded and the person not believing that I was the person on the ID (It was annoying, but also kind of cool)

Seeing a gender therapist (which has kind of petered out)

Buying a suit and looking Gosh darned good in it!