Search the Community
Showing results for tags 'advice'.
Found 4 results
Hello! I am looking for advice if anyone has it on dealing with dysphoria around my hips and butt? I have a good chest binder and like to think i can pass fairly well, but I have a very shapely bottom that causes me a lot of discomfort... I tend to buy specific styles of pants that mask the shape better, but even still sometimes I'll walk by a floor length mirror and cringe 😬 I've seen stuff about compression shorts helping, but want to know if anyone has recommendations before I buy...most of the shorts i find advertise compression specifically in ways i DON'T want... go figure... Any recommendations would be greatly appreciated, either for shorts or other methods to get a flatter looking backside. I'll be getting on testosterone soon and hoping that will help redistribe fat into,better areas, but I can't be sure of that and if so how long it might take.
Kriss posted a topic in Non-Binary and Gender Non-Conforming Support ForumGreetings! I finally find myself at a point in my life where I can try to settle some of the gender issues that have caused so many issues over the years. I'm biologically male, but don't always feel that way. It seems language has finally caught up with what I've always felt. Genderfluid is the best descriptor I've been able to find for me. I have days where I feel very male. Other days very female and feminine. It has not proven to be predictable, which is currently my greatest source of anxiety. I've had days where I feel great. Perfectly at home in my skin. Other days when I look in the mirror I don't recognize the face staring back. All I want to do on these days is crossdress and be as female as possible. Sometimes this switch happens mid day. Which is the worst. I've started shaving, as body hair is a major source of discomfort on what I'll call "fem" days. I've been playing with cloths to try and ease the feelings of being "off" on these days. I can dress around my house, which is great. But doesn't help when I'm at work and can't change or I'm stuck wearing my male cloths. I don't have a desire to transition. I just need some guidance on the best ways to handle the back and forth. Also, if someone knows of a better description than genderfluid, I'm all ears.
Hi there, I’m a 21 year old cis female and my partner is also 21 and has just come out to me as ftm. We are newly engaged and have been together 8 months. I am pansexual so the revelation of them being trans doesn’t bother me, however I am absolutely terrified. All advice and forums I’ve read so far have been mainly negative. I’m so scared I’m going to lose them, mainly over my ‘grieving’ of her. I know things are going to change and the unknown is scaring me and I’m hoping someone has been in a similar position and can just provide me with reassurance in a sense. Thank you!
This probably sounds selfish, but sometimes I wish my family would just disown me. They don’t understand the transgender community and haven’t even tried to understand. Even though they still talk to me and aren’t hate filled people, I just don’t feel a connection with them and feel so isolated. Our relationships weren’t completely destroyed after I came out, but our relationships still don’t seem the same. After I came out, my mom said she would love me and support me no matter what, but a couple of day later, I got up just to hear her yelling at me (for a few different reasons) and explaining to me how I’m not transgender and can never be a boy because of things that she wouldn’t understand the reasoning to. In that moment, I was standing there crying and having a panic attack, and it was worse knowing that she has gone experienced multiple panic attacks before that moment. That is a feeling I will never be able to forget. A few months later, I tried coming out again and explaining my feelings; I got the same words in a calm message version. I was just being influenced by my friends and the rest of society and will never be a real boy. She said we might need to start going to church. My dad wasn’t that bad. I never got any of the yelling that my mom gave me, I still got the “I’ll love you no matter what,” but I also got told that I’ll always be his princess and I’m not a boy to him. My dad doesn’t seem to want to even build a good relationship with me. A few years ago, he got into an accident from drunk driving. He said he was going to change his priorities, but I didn’t seem to be a priority. I rarely see him; He seems so focused on dating and work. I understand that those are important things, but it hurts when I feel much lower on his list. He’s has a lot to do at work, and I understand that, but I don’t understand other things. He’s willing to text other people both inside and outside of work, but most of the texts I receive have to do with upcoming events or holidays or a school announcement and rarely just a text to have a conversation since we don’t get to spend mucvh time together. He’s willing to invite other people to his house after work, but he’s too tired after work to see me. I don’t see why I care about being at his house; it’s usually him sleeping while I go into the other room and play piano. Last year, including holidays and birthdays, I saw him about 9 or 10 time. There were some times my mom had to beg him to take me to/pick me up from school, but a ride in the car isn’t really spending time together. So far this year, I’ve spent time with him 5 times this year. My nana had the worsts reaction when I came out. She told me that I needed to start reading the Bible and going to church. She told me that my mom should have made the choice of home schooling me and that I shouldn’t have the friends that I do. She flat out told me that my friends are dumbing me down. That God made me so smart and I’ve decided to let others turn me into an idiot. I hear her talking about how stupid my community as well as others are terrible. I’ve even heard heard her talking about it with my mom multiple time. One time they were talking about the trans community and how they have a mental illness and need to just accepts themselves. I can’t remember the exact words of my nana’s rant, but my mom was speaking about how she thought she was a boy as a kid because of her big hands. That’s when I realized that neither of them understood. My nana was also saying something about medical professionals and “transgenderism” one time, and has just had rants about thins she seen on the news more times than I can’t count. She did it once just last week. The rest of my family hasn’t heard anything about this, but that just makes this feeling worse. It’s either the strong relationships or the weak ones that boosts this thought. I have a happy and strong relationship ship with my grandfather and step-grandmother, and I don’t want to hurt them. They wouldn’t understand if I came out to them, and my other choice is to throw away a great relationship when I’m 18. My weaker relationship is with my grandmother. I can easily tell that I was never the favorite grandchild. She spends more time with my cousins than she does with me. She is also very conservative. If I were to come out, I’d be surprised if I wasn’t disowned. I know that I’d never stop myself from transitioning, even if I have to sacrifice these relationships. Sometimes I wish these relationships could sacrifice themselves. I wish my mom could get tired of a child who’s apparently being influenced by society and didn’t turn out how she wanted, I wish my dad could forget about his child and just go for his job and the relationship he’s been searching for for years, I wish my nana could be happy with her cishet family, I wish my grandfather and step-grandmother wouldn’t have to deal with losing me when I’m 18, and I wish my grandmother didn’t have to deal with the one who isn’t the favorite who basically goes against her beliefs. I feels it would be so much easier for everyone. I wouldn’t have to deal with the fear, and they wouldn’t have to deal with the me that they didn’t want. Again, this probably sounds selfish, but I feel like it would work better for everyone. As much as I love them, I don’t want to stick to relationships that can hurt me in the end; As much as they say they love me, I don’t want to hurt them or make them mad. They say they’d love me no matter what, but most of them have shown me otherwise in some way.