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  1. I was 12 when I came out as FtM to my friends. Later that year, I forced out of the closet by my own stupidity to my mother and stepfather. It was a blur, honestly. We were fighting, I don't even remember why and my response to some question she asked with "Because I'm not a -censored- girl! I'm a boy!" I wish I didn't say that. Every day I'm misgendered, told I'm a liar and pathetic and various other names. I'm told I'm crazy and lying to myself. She claims there were no signs as a child, and I listed off 18 signs i could remember, when she told me that she'd read my journals. All
  2. Although I currently tell people I'm nonbinary right now (mainly just to try to avoid confusion and the fact I haven't had the chance to try different pronouns), I have a lot of dysphoria. I want to transition, but I am terrified and I feel like I should wait until I find a place I want to settle down so I don't have to worry about not having access to adequate health care for a period of time. My fear stems from transphobia from family members, fears surrounding dating, and fears surrounding just living since South Carolina is not the most welcoming place. The university I attend replaced pre
  3. Guys I think I'm a borderline alcoholic. I'm not sure I'm only 18 yrs old but my sister is a meth addict and because of my hidden trauma from it all I stole alcohol for the first time since I've gone to therapy, but now every time I drink I get this freeling that makes me want to drink the bottle dry and it scares me. If anyone is comfortable talking about it, what were some early signs that led u to know u were an alcohol? Bc I've done online tests but they're all about signs of alcoholism in th later on stages. I do deeply apologize to anyone who may have felt triggers by this post
  4. Pallas

    FtM exercises?

    Are there any exercise tips for getting more a physically shaped male body? Not super muscular, just toned. Like getting noticeable abs, fitter/slimmer legs (less fat, more muscle) and more muscular arms? So a slim-ish look, but it's clear some work-out has been done to maintain oneself. I used to do martial arts a lot but once a week for an hour is clearly not enough. The question is therefor also... How often do the exercises need to be done and how many? (example: 10 sit-ups every day or jog for 30 minutes or... Etc.)
  5. goisard

    Hello friends

    I hope your day is going well! I have already sent a few posts out for approval, but still haven't introduced myself. Since I don't feel like using my real name on forums you can call me Gois, or make up a new name for me, I don't mind, be creative. I'm a pre-medical transition trans man, out to everyone but my hometown, where I still live. It's a small town somewhere in Italy, where homosexual people don't have a full right to marry yet, you can't really expect to feel safe here, especially with all these anti-trans graffiti here and there. I am out to my family but let's
  6. Hi, I am 43 and started therapy a few weeks before COVID shutdown because I have been questioning my identity more seriously for the past 6 years and having serious issues with my marriage with my wife. After getting comfortable with my therapist I am starting to feel more confident that I am ftm trans. I am going back in forth with feeling sure and -what the heck- am I doing. I am lucky that I live next door to my best friend and she is super supportive as well as her husband, as well as other friends and family who will be supportive. i already have questi
  7. crossroadcreep

    Post Injection Pain

    I just started testosterone three weeks ago, but I have been experiencing severe pain after my injection. The first two weeks I became really sore 24hrs after my dose. my entire outer thighs were tender, sore, and hot to the touch. I could barely walk for two to three days before the pain finally subsided in time for next shot. This past week, the third week, I developed an itchy, red lump right where the needle entered. The soreness isn’t as bad as the previous, but there is still a lump. I don’t know what I am doing wrong. I feel no pain when giving the actual injections and make sure to ro
  8. I am currently waiting for my first appointment at a gender clinic but the wait is over a year for me. I have found online pharmacies which offer products like testogel and I’m wondering if it is safe for me to buy and use. I am currently under 18 but I really want to have male hormones in my body, even if they don’t make massive changes it’ll still feel good knowing I have some extra T in my body. I’m just curious if it will impact my transition in the future and if it might prevent me from getting hormones, and I’m also wondering if there are any side effects to it. Thank you to anyone who c
  9. Hello! I am looking for advice if anyone has it on dealing with dysphoria around my hips and butt? I have a good chest binder and like to think i can pass fairly well, but I have a very shapely bottom that causes me a lot of discomfort... I tend to buy specific styles of pants that mask the shape better, but even still sometimes I'll walk by a floor length mirror and cringe ? I've seen stuff about compression shorts helping, but want to know if anyone has recommendations before I buy...most of the shorts i find advertise compression specifically in ways i DON'T want... go figure... A
  10. just.a.human

    howdy :3

    hi everyone! I'm Jayson (most likely) and I'm new to this community. my pronouns are he/him/his, they/them/theirs, or xe/xem/xeir. I was wondering if any elder trans people had advice for a pre-t trans guy? Much love, Jayson (or maybe Mateo)
  11. So my co worker says that i can't be trans gender. if i am not then why do i get so upset when i am told that? Why do i feel this away then. If its just a delusion cosed by my schizophrenia? Then how come I am expecting others opinions. If you suffer form a delusion your more likely to stay in that delusion and not aknowologic anyone else opinion. And i don't feel comferable with other labels throw on me ether. I get overwhelmed actually. Am i used to female pronouns, yes. Do i like female pronouns, no. Sometimes at work when i get called by them. i feel sick physically. So i am not quite
  12. ThePineapple1

    How I found Out I Am Transgender

    So, I never really felt like a girl, more like a tomboy from a very young age. I didn't think much into it. A few years ago, I finally found out what transgender means (along with the other terms like non-binary and cisgender). That's when I started to question my gender. One of my good friends has also recently started their transition from female to male so we are helping each other through it. I never liked dresses or skirts, which is fine. I wear dark colours all the time and I promised myself that I would never wear make-up. I thought the make-up was because I wanted to
  13. Hi im Hoping with opening this discussion i can find some sort of answers for myself..im beginning to accept myself for who i am and thats a male or masculine presenting. Im worried for the repurcussions transitioning could have on my vocal career as well as my hair... theres a lot to unpack and i would hate to sound superficial. I just want to seek help to my hundreds of questions because taking this leap is something im willing to do. Im nervous if it isnt obvious. Thank you for your time
  14. Soooooo this is gonna be a very long post, so bear with me. I absolutely s u c k at decision making and always have done, so this post is gonna be biiiig. I had the same issue trying to figure out my orientation until I had to stop myself and say "you're obviously bi stop doubting yourself". I know that nobody can tell me who I am, I know I'm the only person who can define who I am. I think I just need some advice and support on how to explore this more and how to understand. Buuuut that being said, if anyone reads this and thinks they know what my gender is... Please tell me.
  15. I have been with my girlfriend for over a year now and I discovered in January she used to have feelings for another guy. Our relationship started rocky as I had just come out of an abusive relationship (my first) and this was her first, so we were very immature over what love really was, so we split at the turning of 2018-2019. We got back together, but it turns out she was confused about her feelings with this other guy and was considering getting with him. This broke my heart, but on top of that she had been messaging that guy all 2019 and she said she still would be in 2020 if I
  16. Alex.G

    Hello

    Hey, my name is Alexander and I am FtM transgender. I have socially transitioned but I haven’t transitioned medically in any way, though I am part way through a waiting list to a gender clinic. I live with a supportive family and feel lucky to also have accepting friends, but my family currently don’t understand my transition and struggle to use the right name and pronouns. I’m hoping to find other people like me and after browsing the website I’ve become impressed with the support system on here, and I’m hoping that I can be welcomed into this community and have a space where I feel respected
  17. Marshall

    im marshall

    Hi there, im marshall! Im a little anxious to share my story. when i was in middle school, my 1st year, i started to suspect i was trans. I wasnt new to the lgbt community so i knew the "guidelines" of being trans so to speak (not that we have a guide lol) so i thought about it for awhile. I told my step dad, thinking he'd be understanding and he'd keep it a secret, but alas i was wrong. He had told my mother, and i was guilt tripped into presenting female for a while. Always being told that i couldnt be male as i never acted like a guy (which was a lie, i was the definition of em
  18. luke_b

    success!

    So my study abroad program got canceled because of corona and I had to return to the states, but at least I got 7 weeks out of the 18. When I cam home on Monday, my mom greeted me with a "WHERE IS MY SON" and I was gonna almost cry I was so happy. She's been trying pretty hard to call me my name, my pronouns, and to everyone (my sister and my dad). My sister remembers when convenient for her and my dad is sorta trying ig, but its more than I could have hoped for! I started a tiny workout program today to try and reduce the size of my hips naturally, so we'll see where that goes, and since scho
  19. I'm planning on getting top surgery this year, if possible. I want to find a surgeon who accepts Medicare and can do a surgery that preserves the nipple stalk, like buttonhole or inverted-T. Any recommendations? Right now I have a consultation scheduled for FtM top surgery with Dr. Daniel Freet; he can do inverted-T and accepts Medicare, but I'm not sure if he's the best option. Does anyone have experience with him?
  20. Ryderdie567

    Hi I'm Ryder

    Hi, so my name is Ryder and I am 17 years old, I am a trans guy and I am also gay, feel free to ask me any questions!
  21. Hi! I'm Alexzander, I have been on T for 7 months now and my voice has gotten deeper (yay). It was cracking really bad between 3-6 months, but now I just have a really hoarse voice. I have to really strain myself in order to talk clear and deeper. When I try to talk "normally" my voice constantly cuts off and I sound "feminine". It's super painful trying to go throughout the day straining my voice as if I'm singing every word I say. Has anyone experienced this and do you have any suggestions or solutions? I drink a lot of coffee which I know can dry out the vocal chords (but I'm not giving up
  22. I bought the Peecock Gen 4 a little while ago, and thought a review of it would be worthwhile for those who are looking for an STP. Design Fairly realistic (more realistic than the older models) They've added more realistic balls and a foreskin (as opposed to their older models) The foreskin does not "move", but it's more of an extra layer you can pull. (For example, if you're pinching yourself) You can feel the balls, and as opposed to the older models, it feels like there's a gel or something similar. The leak-guard was way overdue, and a great addition
  23. luke_b

    study abroad!

    So as an attempt to stay away from home, and the constant misgendering that comes along with that, I applied to go away on a study abroad program. My mom insisted that I go to Israel, and since she's paying for it, thats what I went with. It's a jewish program, because my family is jewish, and because my mom wants me to come back home an obedient jewish girl, completely disregarding the fact that I want to go on exchange to begin with to escape exactly what she wants me to be. My mom, of course, signed me up as a girl and tried to make it so that I couldn't have my name and pronouns used
  24. So I'm FTM and I've been wearing binders for nearly 2 years now. These past 2 - 3 weeks my nipples have been unbearably itchy when I take my binder off and nothing is soothing them... Tried moisturising to anticeptic cream. I cannot physically stop myself from itching and it's really starting to wind me up. Any suggestions? TIA PS. I'm not on Hormones, haven't changed my type of binder recently, haven't changed washing powder or soap or anything.

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