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Found 15 results

  1. Erica_is_a_Jem

    Finally ready to begin

    Hello All, Greetings from San Diego! 😃 I am looking forward to getting to know people who are also wandering down the transgender road. At 32 I finally called my doc and started the conversation I have until then, only had within myself. I have recently come out to my SO and family, and I have kind of hit the wall of time, time to make changes, time for my body to change, and time to welcome in life and love. Anyway, I am hoping to connect with others and share stories, problems, and resolutions. P.S. I am a big reader so any good book recommendations are greatly accepted. -E
  2. Amyjay

    Greetings everyone

    Hi everyone, Just landed into this forum and I like what I see. I've been out to some people in my life since 2016. In fits and starts I have made some changes to better present my authentic self. Due to many factors I am still far from being in a situation where I am happy with how I am but I have been fortunate to draw support from close friends as well as connect into a wonderful LGBTIQ community in my local area. Who am I? I wonder that often and since coming out I have felt liberated, terrified, confused and elated all at once or in fits and starts. What I realise since coming out is that the thing that I always struggled with was that I was not able to accept who I am. I do now accept me as I am. As I look back over my life I realise how so many of my life experiences, relationships and challenges were because I am transgender. I never had the words to describe how I was and also lived the life my assigned gender and social norms required me to live but I never fitted. I have played the roles and always found myself on the outer. I am looking forward to connecting with other people who are not cis gender, sharing experiences, supporting others and as I might need it seeking support as I keep finding my way where I am happily being my authentic self to me and others. Amy
  3. I’ve only come to realize who I am in the last 4 months, having thought I was merely kinky while crossdressing the last 15 or so years. I’m now free (some of the time—complicated agreement while going through a divorce) and openly exploring this side of me. I feel free and real when presenting as Josie but do not suffer from severe dysphoria when in boy mode....I just don’t feel happy. Currently in therapy with a counselor/Dr who specializes in transgender issues, and have been making many small steps to feminize. I read and watch, and cry through, many books and videos related to transgender people and their transitions. I’m in the process of deciding whether to begin electrolysis and HRT. I’ve come out to nearly everyone (parents, aunts and uncles, brother/wife, sister-in-law/husband, ex wife, and even those at work needing to know) though I have not dressed in front of them—shared pictures only. I’m openly in both boy and girl modes at my marina. I have come a long way in a short time but I am struggling with decisions regarding moving forward in a permanent way while also facing a ticking clock due to my age (48)....I think I know what I want, but still fear the real reactions once I have to present as Josie full time. Thank you all for your acceptance!
  4. Oh_Kay

    Just joined

    Hello to all, I just joined. I would like to read and share about gender issues. Most of my life, I have struggled with feminine thoughts and being a male. During my teen years, I tried to repress the thoughts and developed ideas that something was wrong with me. I did not feel comfortable talking to anyone about them. During my adult life, I started reading self help books and tried counseling. As I worked on self-acceptance and healing old hurts, my feminine spirit began to emerge. Today, I feel this is me. There is nothing wrong with me, this is who I am. I like the name Kay, but it was taken already. So I went with Oh_Kay. But you can call me Kay.
  5. Marshall

    im marshall

    Hi there, im marshall! Im a little anxious to share my story. when i was in middle school, my 1st year, i started to suspect i was trans. I wasnt new to the lgbt community so i knew the "guidelines" of being trans so to speak (not that we have a guide lol) so i thought about it for awhile. I told my step dad, thinking he'd be understanding and he'd keep it a secret, but alas i was wrong. He had told my mother, and i was guilt tripped into presenting female for a while. Always being told that i couldnt be male as i never acted like a guy (which was a lie, i was the definition of emo teenage boy in ms/hs) . lately however! My mom and step dad broke it off, allowing us to express everything we kept hidden. I came out to my mom and ive started to transition!! She even helped me pick a name and she was there for me when i needed her. Now ive comfortably been using they/ them & he/him pronouns! I dont know if this counts as an intro but im excited to meet some new people and make some friends!
  6. soyangela

    Hello All

    I've been lurking around and decided to signup. I've gone back and forth on what to share and not to share. At times I can be very personal and not share other times it seems the dam opens up and everything pours out at once. My apologies if I ramble on. I'm a little late to this party. I'm 53 years old and I am a transgender woman. It took my entire life to say those last few words. I didn't even know what those words meant 20-30 years ago. I have worm women's clothes since around 8 years old. Got caught by my mother a few times, was told by my father what a horrible and disgusting thing I was doing. I never stopped until my final purge about 17 years ago. A story for another time. I never knew why I wanted to wear women's clothes. But when I did I felt complete, whole. I hid very well my whole life. I got married had a family. Overall my life was good, it wasn't horrible. Dressing was my out my stress reliever. I always felt better after having some Angela time up until my last purge. After that purge I became angry, drank a lot and overall was not a very nice person. I was in deep denial but I didn't know it. Society culturally every where I looked all I saw was what I was doing was wrong. Last year the need\want to dress started becoming overwhelming. I was moodier and angrier then ever. I decided to get help so I could stop this overwhelming desire to crossdress. I started seeing a therapist last year. After a lot of soul searching and crying I came to accept I am transgender. The feeling of no longer denying who I am was exhilarating. It lasted about a day when I realized what will my family think. What will they say. My doomsday wheel kicked in to high overdrive. The only thing that kept me sane all these years was that I have a wonderful wife and daughter that I love very much. There is nothing I would not do for my family. Accepting myself meant that I would destroy my family. That is how I saw it. I went round and round I would tell them I wouldn't I'd go back into denial. I decided to get through the holidays be with family and friends and make it the best holiday ever. In my mind I would lose everything when I came out. Once this new year started my self imposed deadline was ticking. More stress and anxiety. January 15, 2020 is a night I will never forget. Through a lot of tears I told my wife of 30 years that I am transgender. The first thing my wonderful wife said was that she will support me and we are in this together. It made me so happy to hear that. We've had a lot of conversations these past few weeks. Some good some bad. I check on her everyday to make sure she is doing ok. We have been consistently communicating. She asked one day if she could ask me a question. But had read that there are questions she should never ask a trans person. I told her she can ask me anything she wants. I will hide nothing from her. Her question was what's your real name. I told her I'm Angela. Hugs, Angela
  7. KristiLeigh

    Hello

    Hi, my name is Kristi Leigh. I'm newly out as a transwoman. I have been dressing as a woman for over a year now, but just recently acnowledged to myself that I am MTF transgender and not just a crossdresser. I have been having trouble finding a gender therapist on the central west side of Wisconsin. The clinic I use calls me Kristi like I asked them to, but they don't have the resources to help with being a transwoman. Any help would be greatly appreciated. Anyway, 37 years old and asking for help. I don't know how to get the services I need, and Wisconsin medical pays for all of the process for becoming a woman.
  8. Devin

    hello!

    Hello everyone! My name is Devin. I am 19 years old and identify as non-binary. Sometimes I will also call myself transmasculine. As far as my romantic and sexual orientation goes, I mostly just call myself queer because I am unsure of how to identify. Also, most orientations assume you are a binary gender, which I am not. I have a younger sibling who is also trans/nb. I have been out as trans for about three years. I have a top surgery consult in March, and hopefully will have surgery in May or June. My parents are making me wait to start testosterone until after I have top surgery. My parents are my legal guardians, so even though I am over 18, I can not make medical decisions without their consent. I am fortunate to have had my name legally changed when I was under 18. I recently just got my gender marker on my driver's license to say "X".
  9. secondlook

    Deep breath ...

    As of today, the only person who knows that I am transgender is the therapist I'm going to speak with two days from now. Oh, and now you, whoever you are, reading this post right now. To the eye and to everyone who knows me, I'm as masculine as any red-blooded American male could ever hope to be. I'm burly, broad-shouldered, bald and goateed. I have a deep voice and was historically a big sports fan (although in recent years that interest has waned). On top of all this, I belong to a family that is superficially loving and sweet, but that harbors a deep intolerance of any kind of societal nonconformity. I can easily summon to mind the looks of disgust on their faces anytime an LGBT topic arises. And yet, I know that my true self is female. When I finally, fully embraced it just a short time ago, I realized that I always knew this, I was just afraid to confront it. The truth is that the parts of my personality that I have always liked are my feminine aspects, and the parts of me that appear masculine have always been forced on me by outside influences. And as I've gotten older and more and more comfortable with who I am, I've become more and more connected to my feminine side. My wife is the one person in my life who MIGHT accept me. She's a gentle soul and accepting of life in all its wondrous variety. I only fear that the revelation of my true gender will feel like a betrayal to her, like I've been keeping something from her. I hope that my therapist can help me communicate this important life change to her in a way that is respectful and kind. We always make big life decisions together, she and I, and this feels like I've made a huge decision unilaterally. It's got my stomach in knots, thinking about how this might hurt her. And yet, I've got to do it. I know now who I am. I'm just at the very beginning of my transition journey. I know I'm going to lose 99% of my family members' love, but then again, if they never really knew me, and if they choose not to know the real me, did they really love me? My name is Michelle, and I'm delighted to meet you all.
  10. FrozenWinter

    Late Embarkation

    Hi everyone. I created this account two years ago but this is the first time I have posted something on this forum. My name is My Lung (眉胧) and I'm from Vietnam. I am a timid person. I Like listening to English songs and studying languages. Currently I'm studying English and Chinese. I joined our forum with a view to seeking guidance and reading others' journey.
  11. Lilly James

    Hi everyone

    Hi everyone. My name is Lilly. I was born male and recently accepted I was transgender. I found this forum to connect with others like me. Currently I'm trying more things to appear more feminine so any tips are helpful xx
  12. Hello to all, I wanted to introduce myself to all. I have been reading alot of your stories and have gotten a ton of information from a bunch of you. I am Jamie (or one day (hopefully soon) will be). I am in transition MTF, I have been seeing my Shrink now for about 3 months and have been approved for HRT, had my letter turned into my endocrinologist and accepted by her as a new patient. I have been diagnosed with gender / indenity disphoria. I am 48 years young, just about 49. I have always kinda wondered about being female on the inside, but trapped in a man's body. It wasn't until about 6 months ago when it really per say 'hit me' and realized on the inside the my outside isn't me. So I'll be starting with my HRT in the middle of March (unless they have some cancel prior), my endocrinologist is extremely busy. But I wanted to say hi and introduce myself to all. And let you know I have read alot from all of you and I know I will read alot more. And I have some questions to ask for some device on. Merry Christmas to all and talk again soon Jamie
  13. Twinstar4

    Hello

    Hi, I'm a parent and ally, interested in doiing what I can to make the world a more accepting place. I've been in the trans community for 10 years. I entered it full of fear for my child but today I can say she is a healthy, happy, independent adult and I am very grateful. I am also very proud of her. It was a process, and it wasn't easy but our human instinct is to love and protect our children and that's what I did. Im interested in being a member of a mutually supportive environment and that's why I'm here.
  14. SamanthaC

    Hi I'm Samantha

    Hi everyone! I have been on an emotional roller coaster for two weeks, at times feeling like my head was going to explode with all the self analysis I had been doing. So many sleepless nights I've been exhausted. I've been crossdressing for years. Since I was 10 or 11 I think (i'm 56 now). I been through several painful purges - and everything has been fine for about 2 or 3 years. I've been depressed, overeating and drinking way too much. Generally hating myself and not knowing why. Two weeks ago my wife and 10 year old daughter planned a road trip leaving me on my own for the weekend. Normally when I am on my own I love to crossdress - so I started planning the clothes I would buy how which Amazon locker to pick them up from - I had it all worked out. A few days before my wife was about to leave I had an overwealming urge to tell her. to two nights I couldn't sleep, thinking it through, going back and forth, In the end I just blurted it out. My wife is very progressive and works with the LGBT community but even so I wasn't sure how she would react. I know it came as a complete shock to her, but she was very understanding and supporting. I felt extremely happy I told her, it gave me more confidence. To cut a long story short, since then (last week) I've explored a lot of who I am, seen a therapist, shaved my body hair, and had a manicure (leaving my nails long and shaped like a woman nails). I'm pretty sure I'm a transgender woman - it just feels right. I'm more more content and less depressed than i have been and feel good about the life - and for the first time, myself. I have a plan to lose weight - which I'm determined to do. Looking forward to the journey ahead (at least I think so ) .
  15. rainbowmirror

    introducing myself

    Hey there. I'm Henry, a college student studying social work and game design. I'm FtM/transmasculine and my pronouns are he/they. On the trans side of things, I have yet to begin transitioning but I hope to do so one day. I am fully out to everyone IRL. I've known that I'm not a girl for as long as I can remember but solidifying exactly what I am and how I feel wasn't so easy. If I were to take a stab at describing how I feel, I would probably say I'm nonbinary with a bit of masculinity thrown in. However, referring to myself as a guy is easier and requires less explanation to others in daily life. Even if that doesn't wholly capture my gender identity, it is succinct and doesn't create that discomfort and anger in being referred to as a girl. I sure hope that makes some sort of sense? In regards to everything else about me, I am very into music as a listener. Some genres I particularly enjoy are punk rock, metal, industrial, dark ambient... the list goes on. Some notable bands/artists I admire are SWANS, Ghost, Talking Heads, and Dominick Fernow. I collect physical music, vinyl records mostly but I won't turn my nose up at CDs or cassettes. Other hobbies are video games, creative writing, art, and keeping plants and reptiles. My long-term goal as of now is to make my own indie horror game mostly of my own efforts, including the art design and soundtrack. I have been drawn to this forum as a means of reading other people's stories and the guidance/advice given to them and hopefully finding a way to apply it to my own life. I aim to offer some of my own stories or advice down the line once I get acquainted with the platform. Of course, I also hope to befriend and connect with other people like me.
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