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How Can I Be With God If I Am Transgendered?


Guest Vicky

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How can I find God and myself as a Christian if I am transgendered? I have been a Christian for about 15 years, and I had a lot to do with the church before. I was interpreter, bible school teacher and very active in the church for many years. I also saw a lot of good things and a lot of really bad things happening in the church. I am now disgusted of the people in the church. Now I live in a different country, different town, going to a different church, if ever I am going, because I am not going now because I have the inner conflict that I am a woman, but outside I am a man. And if God created me as a man, then why I want to be a woman so much, why my behaviur is not "mannish", why I am so sensitive like a woman? Can God accept me? Even I find in the Bible that man should not dress into woman's dress. So why I have the desire to do this since my early teen age, and why I am a woman inside? And since I found my true-self my sexual behaviour is way much better than before. But how can I sing a song to Him or pray to Him with a clean heart, if I don't know if he is okey with me like this? I know that God loves so much everybody, but inside me, I feel so guilty. And I can not hide this from Him, he knows it all. I am very confused. Somebody can help?

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Guest Jean Davis

Hi honey

First you have to remember that we are ALL made in God's image. Do you believe that God could relate to either gender if God was one or the other. I would tend to believe that God is both genders and that perhaps we are closer to God than most because we have a better understanding.

Perhaps it is time to read between the lines and grasp the meaning God is trying to relay. To love, respect and charish all as God would regaurdless of their differences. I think that that would be the message God is trying to say, perhaps that is the reason we are here.

LUV

Jean

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Guest ~Brenda~

Lily, my dearest,

God is Love. This means that God does not discriminate against anyone. I have seen this idea before about God not accepting one who is trangendered. This is a false idea, promoted by man, not God. God accepts all of us, cisgendered and transgendered. You deserve the presence of God in your life as anyone else does.

You accept God. God already accepts you :)

Love

Brenda

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Lily----I so understand and feel what you are saying, and the emotions behind what you write. For me the greatest epiphany came when I realized that God was so much bigger than they ever told me He was. And realizing it was never about me or who I am but about Him and His unconditional love for me. That said I realized we are the meek whom He intended to be the inheritors of His Kingdom---those of us who have nothing to render us deserving of His merit except His love for us. It is so simple and yet so foreign to our human minds to grasp. When the church says the gates of His Kingdom are closed to us, they are soooooo wrong! Don't let anyone speak for God. He can speak for Himself! We--- The Transgendered, are in a position to know His Grace more than anyone else!!

Ricka

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Lily---another thought: What is a clean heart? It is simply a heart without pretense about being anything but who we are, a heart which approaches God with nothing of our own commendation but only because of His invitation and open arms. How often He has told us this---in the Old and New Testaments but still the Church misses this. And His only commandment-- to love one another as He loves us.

Ricka

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How can I find God and myself as a Christian if I am transgendered? I have been a Christian for about 15 years, and I had a lot to do with the church before. I was interpreter, bible school teacher and very active in the church for many years. I also saw a lot of good things and a lot of really bad things happening in the church. I am now disgusted of the people in the church. Now I live in a different country, different town, going to a different church, if ever I am going, because I am not going now because I have the inner conflict that I am a woman, but outside I am a man. And if God created me as a man, then why I want to be a woman so much, why my behaviur is not "mannish", why I am so sensitive like a woman? Can God accept me? Even I find in the Bible that man should not dress into woman's dress. So why I have the desire to do this since my early teen age, and why I am a woman inside? And since I found my true-self my sexual behaviour is way much better than before. But how can I sing a song to Him or pray to Him with a clean heart, if I don't know if he is okey with me like this? I know that God loves so much everybody, but inside me, I feel so guilty. And I can not hide this from Him, he knows it all. I am very confused. Somebody can help?

Kia Ora Lilym,

Even though personally I have no belief in a god...I've been told on a number of occassions by those who do hold such a belief... "GOD HELPS THOSE WHO HELP THEMSELVES!" so just do what you 'feel' is the right thing to do...In other words if it feels right[and is not physically harming others]then go for it!

Metta Jendar :)

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Thank you very much dear Brenda for telling me that God is Love and He does not discriminate,

and you dear Ricka that His love is unconditional and His grace is more than the way people want to limit.

I am just thinking, if God is really so graceful and loves us as transgender persons, I will be so thanksful to Him forever...I wish i have a revelation about this... , people in the church did already so much damage into my life, tht i don't care about their opinion anyway if they want to close me out. But if He invites me inside the Gates...would be awesome. If He could forgive me and love me as I am, than surely His grace and love is greater than my imagination...

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Lily---another thought: What is a clean heart? It is simply a heart without pretense about being anything but who we are, a heart which approaches God with nothing of our own commendation but only because of His invitation and open arms. How often He has told us this---in the Old and New Testaments but still the Church misses this. And His only commandment-- to love one another as He loves us.

Ricka

Ricka, I think you found what is my other big problem, how can I have clean heart if I am hiding my transgender true-self from the people, eventhough I show and tell the truth to God?

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Kia Ora Lilym,

Even though personally I have no belief in a god...I've been told on a number of occassions by those who do hold such a belief... "GOD HELPS THOSE WHO HELP THEMSELVES!" so just do what you 'feel' is the right thing to do...In other words if it feels right[and is not physically harming others]then go for it!

Metta Jendar :)

Jendar, sweetheart, it feels right to me, because I feel I have to do this, otherwise I am just keeping my true person hiding, but same time I just I need to find my acceptance in front of God if any, and it is a very important issue to me.

Huggs,

Lily

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Guest Sarinah

God made you who you are. Before you were in the womb he knew you and all the days of your life. It is because of who you are that God Loves you. All that god wants from us is our love for him, and an honest heart seeking to love the rest of his creation. Everything else is just life. For God so loved the world that he sent his only son to die on the cross, that all who believes in him will not die but have eternal life. Seek to love God and yourself and all others with all your heart and everything else will fall into place.

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How can I find God and myself as a Christian if I am transgendered? I have been a Christian for about 15 years, and I had a lot to do with the church before. I was interpreter, bible school teacher and very active in the church for many years. I also saw a lot of good things and a lot of really bad things happening in the church. I am now disgusted of the people in the church. Now I live in a different country, different town, going to a different church, if ever I am going, because I am not going now because I have the inner conflict that I am a woman, but outside I am a man. And if God created me as a man, then why I want to be a woman so much, why my behaviur is not "mannish", why I am so sensitive like a woman? Can God accept me? Even I find in the Bible that man should not dress into woman's dress. So why I have the desire to do this since my early teen age, and why I am a woman inside? And since I found my true-self my sexual behaviour is way much better than before. But how can I sing a song to Him or pray to Him with a clean heart, if I don't know if he is okey with me like this? I know that God loves so much everybody, but inside me, I feel so guilty. And I can not hide this from Him, he knows it all. I am very confused. Somebody can help?

Hi Lily,

You say you are a Christian, if you really are so in your thinking and your every day life then you have no choice in the matter hun, God"s love for you,

our Transsexual Sister is as beautiful as it is for all people, its just not your call hun, the Boss is calling the shots on you. viv.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hello Lily,

I was in the same boat as you for a long time. My knowledge of my gender identity issues went back to when I was three. At 17 I game my life to Jesus, and prayed that the Lord would take the conflict away. It never happened. There was a long history of guilt, cross-dressing and then purge and repentance, but never peace. I tried Christian counseling but the advice was not very helpful and sometimes contradictory.

About three years ago I realized that the unresolved conflict was a big part of my ongoing depression. So I went to Persad, which counsels people with GLBT-related issues. They were very supportive of my faith in God, and understood that my healing needed to incorporate my faith. I also began a personal Bible study to help frame my thoughts as I worked through my issues. In addition, my insisted that we inform a few of our friends from our church so they could pray for the two of us. It was a scary thing to look at this part of me with unblinking eyes after 40+ years. But my first commitment was to the truth, wherever it led me.

I could tell you how I got to where I did another time, but here are some of the things I learned on my journey:

- Everyone is different, so there will not be one answer for everyone. Find a counselor who is respectful of your issues and faith, and work with them. I found the questions my counselor asked were very helpful in focusing my attention on the important things. We can do the same act for very different motivations, and I found that for my peace I needed to look at what was motivating my behavior. This requires a certain amount of brutal honesty. There are genuinely transgendered people and there are some who act transgendered but something else is going on underneath. Peace only comes through the truth. I highly recommend Brendan Manning's book "Abba's Child," which talks about getting at the truth of a believer's brokenness as the path to a deeper relationship with God.

- The fall of man touched everything. We are all broken to some degree. There is no shame in this, it is a condition every person has. I came to believe that my gender dysphoria was a result of the fall, just as my near-sightedness, bad teeth and male-pattern baldness was. It is not "good" for my plumbing to be in conflict with my identity. I rejected the "God doesn't make mistakes." argument; tell that to a person born with CP. This world is filled with people who were dealt a bum hand. It doesn't mean that God doesn't love them. I also think it's absurd to insist that the perishable, our bodies somehow automatically takes precedence over the immortal—our souls. So what you and I deal with is extraordinary not because of the Lord, but because our society is so uncomfortable with it. In some societies people like us would be seen as peacemakers and mediators, because we have one foot in each gender.

- The fruit of the Spirit is not different for TG believers. Our lives are to be marked by love, patience, long suffering, humility, service, grace, and all the aspects of a mature believer. Our condition does not exempt us. I had to bite my tongue as my church prayer support let their fears rather than their knowledge of who I am guide their thoughts. I almost lost them as friends, I was so hurt. But Christ calls us to forgive, and I now understand the limits of what they can deal with. Christians do not angrily demand their rights, but treat each other as better than themselves. We are enjoined not to let our behavior be a stumbling block for others. For you, the answer may be a different church. A new support system.

- Lastly, the Lord loves you, and He wants to se you set free. I don't know what freedom looks like for you, but always remember that the Lord convicts us, which leads to repentance and action. The enemy of or souls uses guilt, which paralyzes us into inaction and worthlessness. I had to get to the point where I was willing to follow the Lord in whatever direction He led, even if it meant the end of my marriage or the end of my cross dressing. He loves you. He loves you. He loves you with a love so intense it can be scary. Rest in Him first. Obey his word. Bravely test the truth. Act in faith. You will find your home at the end.

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Guest julia_d

Completely irrelevant subject.. The question really is "Can you accept yourself"??

If you can answer yes to that question then whatever spirituality you have will just have to be comfortable with it. The only person we ultimately answer to is ourself.

Ever heard of the weighing of the heart against the feather of truth?

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  • 1 month later...
Guest Chandra

I feel we are all gods children.

male , female it matters not in the big scheme of things. We are all humane.

It is how we live our lives that count , not the clothing on our skin.

Love Chandra

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Guest DisDwarf

The New Testament says: "Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment." (John 7:24)

This is a command from Jesus telling people not to judge transgender people or anyone else by their body, but examine their soul. If you believe you have truly understood what gender your soul is, then other people must accept you with that gender when you tell them who you are, because Jesus says we must not judge according to mere appearance.

Churches that use the Bible to comdemn transgender people just misinterpret the Bible. Find a church that is LGBTQI-affirming and welcomes transgender people.

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  • 3 weeks later...
Guest Katrina Reann

I too once struggled with shame and guilt because of religious beliefs. But there is a big difference between mainstream religion and God. There are many things that mainstream religion does not accept and preaches against. And they use the Bible as a two by four to smack people in the head. And they take no scientific evidence into consideration. Now I believe was inspired by God but I also believe our Faith in God needs to be balanced with science in many situations such as ours. In other words we shouldn't be so earthly minded that we are no Heavenly good and neither should we be so Heavenly minded that we are no earthly good.

After many years of inner struggle with the shame and guilt of who I am and whether God accepts us this way I simply accepted the fact that God made me this way. And if He made me this way He must have accept it long before I was born. I got tired of the religious game playing and don't attend church the way I used or probably should. But attendance isn't what save us anyway. What saves us is the love of God and the sacrifice His Son made on the cross. He knows we are imperfect beings (meaning everyone0 and that their is many things that go into what makes us us. And He allowed us all to be individuals. I believe when our time comes and we stand before God's judgment throne he will take ALL evidence into consideration along with how we have lived the life He gave us. I don't think we are meant to know everything, overcome everything, or be perfect in every way. That would be defeating the purpose of Christ being born, crucified, and resurrected. I truly believe He wants us to be who we truly are with out shame. And regardless of gender or race as long as we have good morals and have accepted His Son into our hearts we will make it to Heaven regardless of what mainstream religion teaches. And I think many religious people who have been so judgmental will be surprised either at the judgment throne or when they get to Heaven. Because I truly believe there will be a lot of their so called unwanted's will be there.

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Guest Roberta1

IMHO:

One must remember that the Bible may have been inspired by God, but was, none-the-less, written by man, then edited by man.

then all the books were scrutinized and voted upon for inclusion into or exclusion from the Bible, and finally a English King had the last say!

Well, if this is so, then one has to read and interpret the words in the context of when they were written. Finally, God, being a loving God,

the Bible, being a book written by man, plus the fact that God gave man the right to freewill (point to come) How could any thing that

happens on earth be considered against God? The only factor is that we rely too much on others [men] to set the norm, ie: what is

acceptable, and what is not. If it is said enough times, then black becomes white. Undoubtedly, much of what is in the Bible is based on

[oral] history. But There are also stories that may be there solely to teach a moral lesson, and possibly were stretched out a bit to improve

the drama around the campfire.

Sincerely,

Roberta

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Guest Katrina Reann
IMHO:

One must remember that the Bible may have been inspired by God, but was, none-the-less, written by man, then edited by man.

then all the books were scrutinized and voted upon for inclusion into or exclusion from the Bible, and finally a English King had the last say!

Well, if this is so, then one has to read and interpret the words in the context of when they were written. Finally, God, being a loving God,

the Bible, being a book written by man, plus the fact that God gave man the right to freewill (point to come) How could any thing that

happens on earth be considered against God? The only factor is that we rely too much on others [men] to set the norm, ie: what is

acceptable, and what is not. If it is said enough times, then black becomes white. Undoubtedly, much of what is in the Bible is based on

[oral] history. But There are also stories that may be there solely to teach a moral lesson, and possibly were stretched out a bit to improve

the drama around the campfire.

Sincerely,

Roberta

Finally!!! Someone who views the bible as I do. I could not have said it better. God is the one with the power and He still has a voice today that can and does inspire many.ty Roberta...Huggsss

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  • 3 months later...
  • Forum Moderator

When I was a small child the only person in my life who loved and accepted me once told me that if I was still and listened I could fell and know God in my heart and would always know what was right. And for me that has been true.

When I was 5, I was told anyone not a member of our church was going to hell. I stood up right in the middle of Sunday School and shouted "God's not like that and you'll never make me believe it" and stormed out. My great-uncle was an elder in the church and the consequences were severe but I never regretted it. I still feel that way

For me God is too much to be limited and boxed in by the mind of mankind. We just can't grasp it. I have really struggled with the idea at times that I can't understand or define God but I can feel the flow and presence of God. . I believe that the bible is a guide but it wasn't intended to be used to limit God- rather to guide us and get us to thinking. I have heard the same verses quoted in different denominations to condemn each other as wrong. And if we go literally there are some verses-such as the ones about divorce or dietary restrictions that you don't hear quoted now. You can't say the bible is literal and actually true and the turn around and ignore parts that are inconvenient. Not only has it been in the hands of man and subject to all of the flaws of man but as a guide it hasn't been allowed to change as society and conditions change. The truths about love and prayer don't change. Much of human nature hasn't changed so much of the bible is still relevant but I don't think all of it is.

Besides when I read some passages my heart still shouts "God isn't like that and you'll never make me believe it" My God is in my heart and I know that I am loved and accepted there.

God created me this way so I know it's alright.

And there is so much love and comfort and good in this site that I can't doubt the presence of God

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Guest NatalieRene
How can I find God and myself as a Christian if I am transgendered? I have been a Christian for about 15 years, and I had a lot to do with the church before. I was interpreter, bible school teacher and very active in the church for many years. I also saw a lot of good things and a lot of really bad things happening in the church. I am now disgusted of the people in the church. Now I live in a different country, different town, going to a different church, if ever I am going, because I am not going now because I have the inner conflict that I am a woman, but outside I am a man. And if God created me as a man, then why I want to be a woman so much, why my behaviur is not "mannish", why I am so sensitive like a woman? Can God accept me? Even I find in the Bible that man should not dress into woman's dress. So why I have the desire to do this since my early teen age, and why I am a woman inside? And since I found my true-self my sexual behaviour is way much better than before. But how can I sing a song to Him or pray to Him with a clean heart, if I don't know if he is okey with me like this? I know that God loves so much everybody, but inside me, I feel so guilty. And I can not hide this from Him, he knows it all. I am very confused. Somebody can help?

Lily,

God doesn't care about the flesh. He cares about your soul. He cares about who you are and how you have conducted yourself.

Are you a man? Having male plumbing doesn't make you a man. Besides you also have to keep in mind that the bible although the word of God was still written through a mans hand. Some of mans prejudices could have slipped in during the interpretation.

God accepts everyone who accepts him, Jesus made that quite clear. Don't let anyone tell you differently. God loves you. He didn't make a mistake making you but that doesn't mean that you're diverging from his plan. It's likely that we're meant to learn something from our time on earth walking a mile in someone else's shoes.

If your current church can't accept accept you, that is them not God and you should find another church.

Be strong

Natalie

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Guest TinaLynn

the biggest thing i have trouble with is that as a child growing up i was told a story that soon after

i was born my great unt a very spiritual lady and a prayer warior was reading the bible and praying about what

my family never said but as she finshed praying the bible open the book of Timothy and from what i gathereed

she knew that was the name i was to have.

troubling thing is if i'm to live as i feel i 'm from the inside out then by chasnging my name ,,,,,,wouldn't that

a slap in god's face???????

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Guest Hoslers_wife

I have also fought with this for years. I was raised Baptist and struggled with what that meant for me as a lesbian. After years of struggling I came to the conclusion that his loves me, gay/straight/whatever. My husband is transgendered and we feel like its a double no no. Me gay, him transgered but at the end of the day we love and respect people, the earth, and our god. Were good people with caring hearts. We are gods children. He made us this way.

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Guest Girl Emily

This was a burden that played heavily in my guilt and shame that I carried for to long. There are verses in the Bible that praise God for his care and knowledge of our being while we were still developing in our mother's womb. We are not mistakes. The world is mistaken. God does not see and judge as man does. He knows an judges on what's inside and what you have done with what you were given. Paul lists many of the gifts of the Spirit, but he doesn't claim to list them all. God is infinite in His wisdom, His creativity, His understanding, His compassion, His love. We that are trans have been given a wonderful opportunity to live life in both genders. That is just awesome in itself. We have been given a rare gift in a time when God's medical science can give what was never possible before now, how blessed are we? We that are Christian need to boldly say in a loving manner the church is wrong in its position against us as they were wrong about Galileo who is perhaps the man responsible for modern science. "Saul. Saul why do you persecute me?" Should be our battle hymn as we go into battle against those of whom are against us. I went to church twice in the last week and as the congregation whose national leaders called me a sexual deviant akin to pedaphiles I sang How Great Thou Art with a clean conscious until I was brought to tears as I tried miserably to maintain my composure. We need to stop living in fear of the radical or even mainstream Christians and call them to account for the suffering we have all suffered and continue to suffer because of their misguided and blind position against us for it is from the pit of hell itself that it originates. Satan has enlisted neophyte Christians who have been put in position of leadership over the church to attack us because our gift can be a powerfully used weapon of healing to people in and outside the church.

We have been given much and much is expected of us will we live up to our potential our obligation to make the way safe for our followers is yet to be decided.

In His Name

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Guest Genie
the biggest thing i have trouble with is that as a child growing up i was told a story that soon after

i was born my great unt a very spiritual lady and a prayer warior was reading the bible and praying about what

my family never said but as she finshed praying the bible open the book of Timothy and from what i gathereed

she knew that was the name i was to have.

troubling thing is if i'm to live as i feel i 'm from the inside out then by chasnging my name ,,,,,,wouldn't that

a slap in god's face???????

Don't worry about name changing, hon. God has been in the name changing business for a very long time. I suggest you get an answer from him rather than getting it second hand from other people.

"Saul. Saul why do you persecute me?" Should be our battle hymn as we go into battle against those of whom are against us. I went to church twice in the last week and as the congregation whose national leaders called me a sexual deviant akin to pedaphiles I sang How Great Thou Art with a clean conscious until I was brought to tears as I tried miserably to maintain my composure. We need to stop living in fear of the radical or even mainstream Christians and call them to account for the suffering we have all suffered and continue to suffer because of their misguided and blind position against us for it is from the pit of hell itself that it originates. Satan has enlisted neophyte Christians who have been put in position of leadership over the church to attack us because our gift can be a powerfully used weapon of healing to people in and outside the church.

We have been given much and much is expected of us will we live up to our potential our obligation to make the way safe for our followers is yet to be decided.

In His Name

The huge problem with people and transgenderism/transsexualism is, unfortunately, ignorance. When people see one person who happens to he a pedophile, prostitute or a felon, oh how often do they attribute that to everyone in the category. Does that sound familiar? It's stereotyping, which is very common in racism and sexism (especially in New York). It's a little saddening. I am counting on Christian leaders to set a good example in there position to others (like the youth). We all fall into sin, but we are to repent, not continuing to slandering one another.

The description you provided is exactly what modern Pharisees are. While some may hold positions of power, the majority are every day people that are very self-righteous. Not all of mainstream and radical Christians are like this though. 90% of United States citizens affiliate being Christian, but only 10% of them are actually affected at all by Christian theology (if you want the research PM me for them).

Truly I tell you, I live in a fallen world with the vast majority that are autosoteric.

Love,

Genie

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  • 1 month later...
Guest Kimberly S

Hello Lily

I am very young(18 years) but here is how I understand it

In the bible which I believe to be the literal Word of God, in the Old Testament it says a man should not wear women's clothing and a woman not wear a man's, but in the old testament there's 600+ other laws, does that mean we have to follow all of them? Well, yes, it does actually, since Jesus said so himself in the New Testament(forgot where). But Jesus also said:

"'I tell you the truth, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God' When the disciples heard this they were astonished and asked, 'Who then can be saved?' Jesus looked at them and said, 'With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible'"(Matthew 19:23-26). Now I like to take a moment to let those last couple words sink in: "WITH GOD ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE" It gives me goosebumps honestly, think of all those 'religious' people who have judged you in the past, none of them come close to the glory of God, they are human just like you and me.

Another one that I like is Matthew 21:31-32(Spoken by Jesus to the CHIEF PRIESTS OF THE TEMPLE!)'I tell you the truth, the tax collectors and prostitutes are entering the kingdom of God ahead of you. For John came to you to show you the way of righteousness, and you did not believe him, but the tax collectors and prostitutes did. And even after you saw this, you did not repent and believe in him.' Now I'm sure you already knew this, but prostitutes and tax collectors were considered very naughty people back in the day ;) And yet Jesus said they were saved, because they knew they had sinned and they asked forgiveness from God, the only one who can give it.

For more inspiring verses from the Son of God himself, just read the four gospels, they're called the GOOD NEWS for a reason! :)

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    • Willow
      Good morning,   I over slept yesterday was a couple minutes late clocking in.  But no breakfast or coffee.  Got caught up but it was go go go all morning.  I had to ask for a refresher on how I was to enter something but once I got a quick answer it came back to me.    @KymmieL sorry Ford didn’t work out.  We are always looking for good reliable people, I could get you a job here but the commute would be rough.  Today I have three audits to get done, plus other things during my shift on top of the regular things.  Since I am opening that puts me in the drivers seat.  The Asst Mgr comes in part way throuh my shift but she will have to handle customers while I do the work she would be doing if she opened. Tail wagging the dog.  Guess she’s getting punished for not following the Mgr’s requests.  They do tend to butt heads a lot.     Butting heads with people is a thing the Asst is known for.   @awkward-yet-sweet do you think just maybe this new graphics request was in the offing?  And why you were asked to go to work with your husband?  Obviously, he cares about you a lot and is trying to do things to help you.   speaking of meeting people @Adrianna Danielle we have a youngish customer who comes in frequently, I’d like to approach her but I’m just not certain yet.  She still dresses male but has long hair and early chest development.  My approach, if I ever decided I should would just be supportive but I really can’t be sure that is what is going on here or what and I would not want to make a big blunder if that’s not what he is doing.  A male with early teen boobs doesn’t want to be noticed.   well, I can’t be late again, I’ve got to leave now.  See you again later for afternoon tea and crumpets or scones. Mmm scones!   lol   Willow
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://www.nbcnews.com/nbc-out/out-health-and-wellness/scotland-pauses-prescriptions-puberty-blockers-transgender-minors-rcna148366     Carolyn Marie
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://www.huffpost.com/entry/a-second-trump-presidency-would-be-a-nightmare-scenario-for-transgender-people_n_661ff9a9e4b07db21fd5d59b     Carolyn Marie
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Well, HIPAA is basically useless for keeping government out of your medical stuff.  It doesn't seem to prevent employers from making workplace medical demands either.  About the only thing it seems to do is keep somebody's sister or spouse from having the tools necessary to help you when you're in trouble.  As usual, government made things worse and added unhelpful red tape.  I really doubt HIPAA will be any use in the area of trans rights either.    Honestly, I don't see anything good will come of this no matter how it goes.  If some state AG's win on this, it will cause issues for trans folks.  If the Feds win on this, it'll be a precedent to stomp on states' rights even more than has already been done.  And I'm not sure which way things go will make a difference when it comes to officials from one state trying to do nasty things to people who have left that state and gone elsewhere.    What a crap sandwich... and no matter which plate it gets served on, "We The People" get to eat it. 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      At least you tried!  Something equivalent or better may come up, and the waiting could be worth it.  Just keep trying and you'll eventually get what you need and want.      For me, having somebody to love was the most important.  Everything else follows after that.  I waited a long time to find somebody...and she ended up leading me to more than I ever thought possible.    Actually, I'm feeling pretty good right now.  I have something work-like outside of my home responsibilities to do for the first time in about 18 months.  Nobody seems to mind the real me.  And this evening, my husband said something that just really made me feel special.  He was rubbing my back, shoulders, and chest while we talked, helping me relax.  He told me that he thought I was really cute in my girl form, but that he thinks my boy form might even be cuter.  And that he's proud of his "smart little Pocket Fox."    For me, the combination of those sweet words and the physical affection was exactly what I needed. 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Hi!   That was probably hard to write and then read and say, did I really write that?  Been there.   I'm glad you call it a journey.  It is.  One step at a time, and sometimes two steps forward, one back.    Abby
    • April Marie
      Welcome to the forums, Violet! We glad you found us! No one here will judge you. Each of us is unique yet we all share some similarities. And many of us are in the relative early stages of self-discovery.   Take time to wander the sections of the forums. You’ll find lots of information and ideas.   Ask questions if you feel comfortable. You will find lots of people willing to share their experiences.   Is it possible for you to possibly work with a gender therapist? Many of us have found that to be extremely helpful in finding our identity and out true selves.   Just jump in. We don’t bite! We’ve all been in some version of where you are.
    • April Marie
      Literally. 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Shameless plug for my "Taylor" story down in Stories You Write.  I am not Taylor and the experiences she goes through are not what has happened to me, but there is an emotional expression that I think is the best way to say some things that I don't know how to say otherwise.  I am not Bob, either.  But you might find out some things about me by reading it.  And I hope it is a good read and you enjoy it.  I am not done with it.  If you would like to comment on it, I would appreciate it.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Tuesday night.  They had a quick supper together at a fast food place.  Bob went off to teach karate and Taylor locked herself inside her apartment and worked on her hiring plan.   First the web site problem.  The two guys who ran it were self-taught and knew little.  It currently had three pages, the Home page, the About page and the Contact page,  She asked them to work with Karen in terms of redesigning it and she needed three designs to show Gibbs tomorrow.  The problem was three fold: the two guys and Karen.  Millville was a small town and all three were relatives of members of the Board.  Millville, Millvale. She was doing it.  People here called it either way, sometimes in the space of a few seconds.  She thought it was Millville.  All three had complained about the work, because the two boys regarded it as done and untouchable, even though they actually had not worked on it at all for months.  Like a number of people, they showed up and collected generous pay checks and did nothing.  She had looked at a number of websites and she had been told the company wanted one both internal and external customers could log into.  Her chief difficulty at the moment there was that there was very little content.  She decided to send the three complainers out tomorrow to take numerous pictures of the thirty acres  Or was it forty?  No one seemed to care. She cared, because she needed to get it right.  She debated outsourcing the website to a company, but first she needed something to outsource, and before then she needed to decide whether to keep these people.  She didn't need to mess with them.  So she decided to recommend they hire an experienced website developer with management skills. Would such a person come to Millville?  The schools were good, because the company had poured money into them, and the streets were well paved.  The company had bought all the abandoned houses and maintained them, hoping someday they would be filled again. Millville was crime-free.  People did not lock their doors. Neighborly. Very conservative, but in a good way.  Hard working, ethical, honest. Maybe the Chinese money was corrupting the town?  Not sure.  So she thought they would hire someone, even if it were a remote position.  She would rather have them here, but she would take what she would get.  That would move the website out of her hair. Secondly, she needed an effective presenter.  She could not do all these presentations herself.  She had natural talent but a lot could be passed on. She needed another Mary and another Brenda, or their understudies, effective hardworking people.   Bob. Was he okay with this?  He said she was Management.  Was that a problem?  And she was now earning a ridiculous salary, which she put down to company dysfunction more than anything she had done.  Was that a problem? She was not sure.  He was highly competitive and he had that male ego.  She did not.  A feeling of guilt rose.   Her therapist had brought up her feelings of guilt about not making Dad's expectations, never being the man Dad wanted her to be.  She never could, and this physical evidence backed that up.  What would the doctor say?  She thought about it, and that her therapist said she needed to find a sexual assault survivor's group more than a transgender group right now. Was there one here?  She thought about serving in a women's shelter.  There was one here, oddly enough connected to the church they had visited.  That F on her drivers' license would help.  She was waiting until after she talked to the doctor again to move on that stuff.   Was Bob really buying 160 acres near the old air strip on speculation?  Much of the land around Millville had been for sale for a long time.  That land was being offered at a dollar an acre, the owners having inherited it and now living out of state. Common knowledge.  They would take the first offer, and it had been for sale since the airstrip closed twenty years ago. Airstrip.  That would help.  Not tonight. Focus, girl, she told herself, and read over her notes to do so, which were making less sense the further down she went. It was eleven, and she gave up and went to bed.
    • violet r
      .my name is violet. I'm new here and thus is my first try at forums. I'm 45 and just recently having came to terms of who I really am. Thought a lot of self discovery since I stopped drinking. Drinking was my coping mechanism to hide a lot of thing. There were plenty of signs though the years. As I look back. That i hid inside. Now really sure what made all of this bubble to the surface at this time in my life.  Mabye it was waiting for me to be open minded and ready to accept that I am trans. I have a very unhealthy environment at home that is anti trans. I really don't know what else to say but hi. I hope everyone here will be accepting of me and me work through my journey of finding the real me. I know that since I accepted it I have been much happier than I can remember. Being to real me makes me happy. I hate having to hide this all the the time at home. I work retail management and have no idea if I could even stay in this business if I am to fully come out. Wow that was scary saying all that. It's a first for me
    • Ivy
      It is a lifesaver for a lot of us.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Thanks.  What I do as a man is what a woman would do if she were a man.  There is just something feminine about the way I act as a man.  It's not that being a woman is actually better, or something to aspire to, but it is just that I am one, while not being one.   If beating my head bloody to get rid off this stupid dysphoria would fix it I would find the nearest wall, but I know that if I did that, when I woke up, it would still be there.   If I did not have this struggle I would be someone else and I would be less of a person than I am.  They say an oak tree growing in an open field is far stronger than one in a forest.  The storms come and go and I stand.   This forum is the first time I have interacted with other people struggling with the same struggle and parallel struggles. It helps.
    • Ashley0616
      I'm sorry! :( Hopefully something better will come up
    • Ashley0616
      Thank you! Did great with the kids
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