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Dilation


Guest kelise

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Guest kelise

Everyone seems to stress the need for dilation severely. I understand this, as the body will collapse a neovagina without regular maintenence.

I am a devoted lesbian, with a lesbian girlfriend whom I met and fell in love with post-transition (I am still pre-op) We're both looking forward to my surgery. As of right now, sex for us consists of me pleasing her, not vice versa. Once I do get the surgery though, I really have no interest in being penetrated by her, just as she has no interest in being penetrated by me. All i seek, functionality wise, is an orgasmic clitoris. So, my question is, if the neovagina collapses, is there still possiblity of reaching orgasm?

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Guest Charlene_Leona

If you were not interested in a full depth neo vagina I know some doctors will do just what I call a front door surgery which gives you a pubic area that most resembles a woman's privates with only a depth of 1 inch. Allot of Katoys in Thailand will do this for the fact that it's allot more inexpensive than having a full SRS. Plus if this were the case your healing time would be weeks compared to months that a full SRS. I have also know of a woman that when she had her surgery done the doctor found that her urethra was fused to her colon and was unable to perform the full SRS and instead of stopping the surgery he did this for her. She was happy with the fact that she now looked outwardly like the female she saw herself as and it didn't bother her one bit at all that she couldn't have intercourse.

Take Care

Charlene Leona

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  • Admin

Kelise, I'm sure there are some others with experience in this area that will add their comments.

Thanks for your reply, Charlene. I know this is an area that many are concerned about.

Carolyn Marie

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Guest ~Brenda~
So, my question is, if the neovagina collapses, is there still possiblity of reaching orgasm?

Kelise dear,

You need to discuss this question with your surgeon. From what I know about vaginoplasty, you do not ever want to let your vagina not to heal properly!!!

If you have full vaginoplasty, then you will need to dilate. That is the only way to ensure proper healing and health.

Look online hon about this. I would post some links, but I could not find anything that was not too graphic. So be prepared for that. The links you find will be very graphic.

Don't fool around with SRS.... OK?

Love

Brenda

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  • 3 weeks later...
Guest Melanie Dawn
If you were not interested in a full depth neo vagina I know some doctors will do just what I call a front door surgery which gives you a pubic area that most resembles a woman's privates with only a depth of 1 inch. Allot of Katoys in Thailand will do this for the fact that it's allot more inexpensive than having a full SRS. Plus if this were the case your healing time would be weeks compared to months that a full SRS. I have also know of a woman that when she had her surgery done the doctor found that her urethra was fused to her colon and was unable to perform the full SRS and instead of stopping the surgery he did this for her. She was happy with the fact that she now looked outwardly like the female she saw herself as and it didn't bother her one bit at all that she couldn't have intercourse.

Take Care

Charlene Leona

THIS is interesting... I will have to do some research on this.

Melanie Dawn

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Guest Evan_J
If you were not interested in a full depth neo vagina I know some doctors will do just what I call a front door surgery which gives you a pubic area that most resembles a woman's privates with only a depth of 1 inch. Allot of Katoys in Thailand will do this for the fact that it's allot more inexpensive than having a full SRS. Plus if this were the case your healing time would be weeks compared to months that a full SRS. I have also know of a woman that when she had her surgery done the doctor found that her urethra was fused to her colon and was unable to perform the full SRS and instead of stopping the surgery he did this for her. She was happy with the fact that she now looked outwardly like the female she saw herself as and it didn't bother her one bit at all that she couldn't have intercourse.

Take Care

Charlene Leona

Wow, I didn't know there was a surgery option like that. Good info.

As for the "will I still be able to orgasm " question, IF indeed what they say is true, that the primary nerve of the natal penis is the same as the natal clitoris, then I would say yes. Although some women like the sensations of penetration and pressure to the skenes gland during it, their orgasm occurs through the nerve inside the clitoris. Many women argued that they were experiencing their orgasm vaginally/ due to the vagina. But in fact, in the end, it was the nerve that sent the sensory experience of an orgasm to their brains , even when contact was not made with it directly. So you should be able to. Again, if that nerve is the same.

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Guest Elizabeth K

ummmmm...

I have two post op friends MTF - one at 4 years one at 35. Both did dilation for a year to allow proper healling, then stopped. Both now, for different reasons, wish they had kept up with the recommended dialation schedule. I think it helps the sensitivity to the cliteris too.

Just passing this on.

Lizzy

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Guest Donna Jean

Hmmmmmmm.......

Well, I want the works....

And at 60 I may never get to use it....

But, I want the option!

Donna Jean

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Guest NatashaJade
Hmmmmmmm.......

Well, I want the works....

And at 60 I may never get to use it....

But, I want the option!

Donna Jean

Me, too! I want to get SRS because it is a matter of completion for me. I want to be as much of a woman as possible.

luv

Gin

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Guest Elizabeth K
Hmmmmmmm.......

Well, I want the works....

And at 60 I may never get to use it....

But, I want the option!

Donna Jean

YOU ARE SUCH A FLOOZY!

In that village where you live - after SRS - I am sure if you just sit at the right stool at the right bar at the right time at night... well - free sex!

WAIT!

NO NO NO

nevermind!

Lizzy

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Guest Melanie Dawn
YOU ARE SUCH A FLOOZY!

In that village where you live - after SRS - I am sure if you just sit at the right stool at the right bar at the right time at night... well - free sex!

WAIT!

NO NO NO

nevermind!

Lizzy

OMG Lizzy!

Melanie Dawn

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Guest Melanie Dawn
chuckles. gives Melanie Ice cubes. Here....you're gonna wanna make her a compress.

hehe and one for myself LOL

Melanie Dawn

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Guest Joanna Phipps
Me, too! I want to get SRS because it is a matter of completion for me. I want to be as much of a woman as possible.

luv

Gin

Gin for me its bout the same thing, being as complete as possible. As a lesbian, it might be fun if I could get may partner involved with the dialation you know doing the insertion and what have you... hmm sounds like it might be interesting.

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Guest Elizabeth K
Gin for me its bout the same thing, being as complete as possible. As a lesbian, it might be fun if I could get may partner involved with the dialation you know doing the insertion and what have you... hmm sounds like it might be interesting.

My thoughts exactly. I already have someone in mind. Emmmmmm... enough on that!

Lizzy

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Guest Evan_J
My thoughts exactly. I already have someone in mind. Emmmmmm... enough on that!

Lizzy

....gonna have to upgrade you to a walk in freezer. lol

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Guest kelise
YOU ARE SUCH A FLOOZY!

In that village where you live - after SRS - I am sure if you just sit at the right stool at the right bar at the right time at night... well - free sex!

WAIT!

NO NO NO

nevermind!

Lizzy

I'm confoozed.........nvm. I don't want to know.

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  • 1 month later...
Guest Half_Jill

Gin for me its bout the same thing, being as complete as possible. As a lesbian, it might be fun if I could get may partner involved with the dialation you know doing the insertion and what have you... hmm sounds like it might be interesting.

My girlfriend gets turned on by the whole process. It's was a little strange at first but turned out to be a wonderful incentive to keep on schedule. :)

Admittedly I'm not as good about it as I should be and let me say first hand that the consequences of not doing it often enough far outweigh the inconvenience of doing it as prescribed. If you slip up on the routine just by a little, you can literally feel your vagina collapsing. Needless to say, it is not a pleasant experience the next time you dilate. Plus, you never know if penetration is your thing or not until you have the opportunity to try. Body's don't lie.

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Kelise,

In my consult with Dr. Mcginn said she uses a scrotal skin graft to the inverted penis to give you more depth, standard procedure for most of the surgeons these days, she said she could also do just the inversion without the graft but the depth would be less, since i like lesbians and transmen the depth is not that important plus the surgery does not take as long, i thought about it but decided i want as much depth as i can get just in case my preference changes or i want to give the real deal a whirl.

DR. Mcginn's dilation schedule is more than other surgeons, especially in the beginning, this is something i am not looking forward to especially in the beginning, it is a necessary evil, her pamphlet says 5 times a day for 30 minutes for the first 8 weeks, she says this is the critical time while everything is healing.

Kelise, you never know if you and your partner may want to use toys in the future, you only get one shot at srs may as well go all the way.

Paula

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  • 4 weeks later...
Guest carrielee

Kelise:

I know two post-op girls who didn't want anything to do with men penetrating them while they were pre-op. The dialated anyhow, as was prescribed by their docctor.

Both are super glad they did it.

One began to get the urge for a man after about 2 years. She began dating men and had a wonderful sex life with them. The other began to wonder how she knew she would not like bieing with a man if she hadn't tried it. Well, she tried being with a man. Did not love it, but liked it enough that she now dates men and women and enjoys both.

It is always a good idea to keep your options open.

Love,

Carrie

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Guest Alice4016

Salam,

Dilation is important for other reasons than just penetration; so my best advice is to just keep up with what the doctor asks of you. To be honest, I am about a year post-op and since maybe 10 months or so I have been able to severely cut back on the amount of time I spend with dilation etc so it is not something to worry about or be frightened by :D. Would you still "work" without dilation, I can only assume so as the two parts are practically unrelated in terms of sensation, but honestly it never hurts to keep everything in working order. I am a lesbian as well and my partner and I hardly ever use toys etc and I am still able to orgasm, so clearly the two are not dependent on one another (well, to be honest for penetration this is not true one needs the other) but in terms of clitoral stimulation no vaginal stimulation is actually needed to climax. (Wow! since reverting to Islam I have not spoken about sex with ANYONE in a loooong time lol :P feels kinda strange to be honest)

Sister, to be honest please follow the recommendation of your doctor (as they do happen to be the "medical professional) as not dilating can lead to some rather uncomfortable situations down the road; it's quick, short, and painless so it's best to do it; but all a personal choice I guess...and you'll never be able to predict totally into the future you know? What if one day you get the urge (as this does happen, sometimes you just "need" that) so keep your options open.

Best of wishes,

Nashida (reverted name changed legally...again...lol)

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  • 1 year later...
Guest DesiB

I just read a great book (recommended by my surgeon's office) from 1982 called The G-Spot by Beverly Whipple, et. al. and some of the early reasearch involved lesbians who learned how much pleasure could be obtained via the G-spot. To be able to access this easily, you may not need much width for a finger or two, but you'll still want 4 inches or more. And while this book does not address trnasexuals specifically, it does an excellent job of illustrating all the parallels between male and female anatomy. The prostate is not a male-only body part (as I had mistakenly thought), but is actually the G-spot in females--located just below the bladder and wrapped around the urethra. Males can only access this through the anus, but women access it through the vagina--sometimes assisted by pressure just above the pubic abdominal region. So I hope this helps keep you motivated to do your dilations!

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The class moved into sparring, breaking into twos and practicing moves against each other.  Bob was moving among the pairs, adjusting positions of hands, hips, feet.  Taylor was unsure about someone touching her like that, her hips particularly.    The green belt class ended as new students came in for the beginners' class. Down at the other end the brown belt class began.  The room was large enough you could do two classes at the same time.   The other beginners, nervous, lined up at Margie's table.  People got into gis, the men in their big area and only woman in the little restroom that was for them.   Sensei Mark greeted them and showed them where to stand: on the little x's on the floor. He explained the School Code.  They would recite it at the beginning of class and they needed to memorize it for the white belt test, at which time they would, of course, receive a white belt. He explained some terms.    They warmed up with some basic, easy stretches.   They learned a kata called Taikyoku Shodan, involving blocks, punches and some movements. This was not bad.   She was now paired off with Judy.  Things were going well and this was not too bad. Judy was sixty years old and had been told to exercise by her doctor.  Taylor said her boyfriend was teaching the other class, which was impressive, and he wanted her involved.   "You remember the gedan barai - downward block?"  They did. Everyone showed him and he went around and made sure everyone had it down. "And the lunge punch?"  They did. "Now we are going to put them together. One of you will punch and the other block it. Okay?"   Taylor squared off against Judy.  Her heart was pounding.  She practiced her gedan barai as Judy practiced her lower lunge punch.  Then they faced each other. "Okay, first partner, lunge punch.  Second partner, lower block.  Slowly.  Go!" Taylor saw the punch coming at her, but instead of blocking it her eyes welled up with tears and she dropped to the floor, weeping uncontrollably. "Oh God, Oh, God, Oh God, make it stop, make it stop" she shouted to parties unseen. Fetal position, rocking back and forth. Crying hysterically. "I didn't go near her," Judy said, bewildered. "Taylor?"  this was Sensei Bob.  Both classes had stopped and were looking at her. She kept crying. "I am here, "Bob told her, not touching.  "Oh Bob you need a wife who can be a real woman to you. I am making you into a monk or something." And she continued crying at full volume. "You need someone better than me, someone who can give you kids." Everyone could hear this.  They were turning away, trying to pretend they could not hear this. "I need to get her out of here and take her." Bob said, and he and Mark bowed to each other. He scooped her up and she bawled into his shoulder.  She clung to him.  First hug ever. Death grip, more like it. "Judy, would you get her things?" "I did nothing," Judy said, and moved towards the restroom, stunned.  "Nothing." "I know what she was wearing," Margie said, and got them. "I've got a gym bag. It 's red and it says Roosters on it. Can you get it? Mark got it.  He accompanied them to the car.  Taylor was non-stop crying deeply, clinging to him for dear life. Mark unlocked the car and together they managed to pry Taylor off of him, even though it took both of them to do it.  She was in the car seat and they managed to buckle her in it. "I am going to take you to your apartment," he said. "No. Emergency room," she said. "Maybe the psych ward."  He didn't doubt it. She calmed down in a few minutes on the way. "Well, that was embarrassing." "Everyone remembers their first day of karate class." "Bob, what I love about you is your sense of humor." "I love everything about you." "Even this?" "Yes. Even this." She managed to walk into the ER.  They were both still in gis. "Karate accident?" "No. I am Taylor and I am a nut. I wear a gi all the time. I make my boyfriend wear one, too." "She had a triggered event.  She's had some difficult times." "I see. Do you you know are bleeding?" "No."  Her crotch was wet with blood and the blood was seeping down both legs. She was wheeled away. "Sir, please wait here." He did.  He had no legal right to see her right now. After a while a nurse came out and said he could come on  back. There she was in a hospital gown.  "Seems like old times." "yeah.  We gotta stop meeting like this." The nurse buzzed around and left them. "They are running tests." "I bet they are." "I got an MRI. On a Saturday morning, too."  First ever. "You rate.  But why?" "They figure some of the old scar tissue - you know, from the- from the past - ripped open and they need to see what is going on." "We know what is going on,"said a doctor, stepping in. He looked at her. "I am Doctor Michaels.  They called me in.  I just happened to be in the building and they wanted me to see this and take the case.  My specialty is Disorders of Sexual Development. But what I am seeing is little in the way of disorder.  Look at this." They looked at the image. "This is a perfectly ordinary uterus." "Uterus?" "Yes, your uterus." "What?" "That is not all.  This is a cervix, and this is a vagina." "It's blocked up." "Yes.  It looks like you had surgery to do exactly that when you were an infant.  They used to do that." "This is me?" "You." "Really?" "I imagine this takes some getting used to. "Can it be undone?" "Absolutely. I mean, I cannot guarantee it, but it is more than likely. I would like to run some tests." "And the bleeding?" "It looks like the hormones you have been taking have kicked of a regular monthly cycle. Then you did a whole bunch of exercise.  Not surprising." "What?" "I want you to come to my office next week for follow-up.  Have you ever had a genetic test of any sort?" "No." "Well, your testes - one looks at first glance more like an ovary." "Ovary. Can I have kids?" "Too soon to tell.  You look happy." She did.  "Bob, you look stunned." "I am." "Given what happened earlier today we want to keep you overnight for observation.  I understand you are a trauma victim and something triggered it." "I got a punch thrown at me in kara-tay class, is all. I am a wimp." "Well, I will let you two talk for a minute and they will come and get you shortly.  No bad news here." "They are coming to take me away, hah-hah, they are coming to take me away," Taylor chanted. "Bob, I am not done with kara-tay.  I want to at least finish a first class. I mean, you paid for it and I want you to get your money's worth." "I think I got that." "Kiss me, you fool,"  she said, and he did, with energy.        
    • April Marie
      These arrived in yesterday's mail. I'm out working in the yard today so just old clothes. I'm looking forward to wearing this t-shirt dress when the weather warms up a bit more.  
    • missyjo
      Ashley I've known busty girls who wore b nice bras tl work n such then like a sift sports bra to lounge or sleep in hugs
    • missyjo
      your nails b hair came wonderful  congratulations  enjoy
    • Willow
      The one thing about this position, if you want more hours just wait and be flexible.  I’m now working until 7:30 pm instead of 4:30.  
    • Ashley0616
      I hope your head cold goes away soon! Sorry you have to cut grass with that.   Love the new t-shirt   I love that one.    What Jeep would you want to get? That is awesome about your wife getting better!
    • Ashley0616
      Welcome Mattie! I would recommend the first step is finding a gender therapist and see if you are or aren't. Then one of the biggest steps if you are do you want to start hormone replacement therapy. The decision should be thought long and hard. There are irreversible effects. Looking forward to your next post! Take care!
    • Ashley0616
      Congratulations on being able to pick up a cancellation! I hope to hear more updates about your transition. 
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