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Internet Porn Addiction Help

Sex or Porn addiction  

66 members have voted

  1. 1. Are you a sex or porn addict?

    • Yes
      25
    • No
      41
  2. 2. Would you be interested in a weekly support meeting to help you quit?

    • Yes
      22
    • No
      44


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Guest

Today I had to calm the wife of A CD and trans admirer who found Transgenderist (crossdresser is the offensive porn term) Porn on her husbands computer. He also belonged to several sex and chat sites. The woman is near suicidal. This of course is not an isolated incident. I've received tons of email on this subject. While i was researching the subject I found a lot of helpful information especially on a google search under the term "Internet Porn". One article said it was more addictive and harder to kick then drug addiction. I also found a good help site http://newlifehabits.com/ and a forum for those addicted and their partners http://newlifehabits.freeforums.org/ . This is if course mature subject matter so be forewarned. There are hypnotists who claim they can help.

If you are addicted to Internet porn you are far from alone as it is far too common. Millions are addicted.

Internet Porn: Worse Than Crack? http://www.wired.com/science/discoveries/news/2004/11/65772

Overcoming porn addiction http://www.throughtheflame.org/

Wikipedia http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pornography_addiction

Partner Therapy group http://www.partnertherapy.com/forum/46

Recoveries Anonymous 12 step program http://www.r-a.org/i-internet-porn-addiction.htm

Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous SLAA http://www.slaafws.org/

If there is enough interest here I will start a chat support group for sexual addiction that will meet weekly. I'd just need to find a moderator to host it.

Laura

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Guest Just_Call_Me_Nick

I am a sex addict currently in therepy.

Before I moved to MI I was currently in therepy in Ms...however the therepy there was not all that great...but here I find it very helpful.

Alot of people misunderstand about sex addiction...and this is one thing I had to learn while in therepy for it.

I would love to have a weekly chat for this subject. Sadly right now I am currently without computer...however in the next few weeks I should be back up and running before to long. I just really hate using this computer or that computer...grrr

But yes I am a addict and yes I vote that we do have weekly chat sessions for this....

Nick~

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Guest Just_Call_Me_Nick

Yeah update....I officially have a new computer!!! Yeah...so bring on the chat.... :lol:

Nick~

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Guest Tiger

Laura, thanks for the helpful links, I reviewed mostly all of them and found them helpful, I am myself am addicted to porn and find myself watching porn at least 3 times a day. Every since I had this problem i cannot stop. These are pretty good references as well:

Porn Affecting the Libido:

http://www.edguider.com/edblog/2008/12/01/...ect-the-libido/

The Porn Addiction Test:

http://www.no-porn.com/test.html (this is a good wat to idenify if you are addicted to porn)

I tired to stop myself from watching to much but only lasted two days :(

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Sally
Laura, thanks for the helpful links, I reviewed mostly all of them and found them helpful, I am myself am addicted to porn and find myself watching porn at least 3 times a day. Every since I had this problem i cannot stop. These are pretty good references as well:

Porn Affecting the Libido:

http://www.edguider.com/edblog/2008/12/01/...ect-the-libido/

The Porn Addiction Test:

http://www.no-porn.com/test.html (this is a good wat to idenify if you are addicted to porn)

I tired to stop myself from watching to much but only lasted two days :(

Tiger,

I find myself being viewed as standing on the ouside looking in - I don't have any recognized addictions, never smoked, drank, used drugs, gambled or watched porn - so what could I know about addictions?

I didn't reach 360 pounds by just eatting a little too much every now and then - no, I had what one would have to call an addiction to carbinated drinks, colas in particular. If I had a meal, I had a coke - even at breakfast, if I had a snack there was a coke - I couldn't eat ice cream unless it was in a glass with Root Beer poured over it (Haven't had a Black Cow in over a year). I drink an average of one glass of a carbonatrd soft drink once every ten days or so - where I used to drink a two litter bottle every day. How did I break the addiction and it was a true addiction, I substituted - when I sat down to eat I would automatically reach for a cola so I replaced that cola with tea or fruit juice - I had to really think about it but I was able to do it, now I have tea, juice or water with my meals, I only have a coke for an occasional treat. I am dow to 328 just by not drinking colas.

Find something to replace porn when you aren't doing anything else - you are just watching it out of habbit and your addiction at this point. You are feeling so much guilt for not being able to stop that you don't actually derive any pleasure from it now, so find something that is constructive or needs to be done and when the urge strikes, force yourself to do that instead. I am working on snacking now (still fighting the weight) and everytime I feel the urge to snack, I start straightening something - not only will I lose weight but I will have the cleanest house on the planet!

I hope that was of some help to you, Tiger, but the only way it can work is if you really want it to.

Love ya,

Sally

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Guest Elizabeth K

What can I add?

I was once a pretty avid fan of pornography of a sort - transgender transformation fantasy type. I hated the exploitation sites - she males and such - but sometimes would get there by accident. I was Fictionmania addict for sure - and Lana's where there is so much 'transformation into a woman' fantasy, I had to check it every day. But it is like the differene between Playboy pornography and Hustler. I was always looking for the 'classier' sites. And my wife would catch me sometimes. She is very lusty and we watch a lot of what we call 'funk' on satellite TV - not pay sites, just that normal weird stuff you sometimes find late Friday and Saturday nights.

She could NEVER understand why I wouldn't show her the sites I went on in the computer. Well... they showed my interest in being a woman. I couldn't show her... too revealing.

But I outed to her. We talked and she insisted I go to therapy. There I discovered I am a MTF transsexual - and all the questions I had about myself fell in place. Amazingly, when I knew I was REALLY a woman, I dropped the addiction to porn without knowing it. It simply went away. I tried looking at some afterward as an experiment - nope - no interest. I suppose it is because I live it now - this transformation thing. I am on HRT and in transition. Amazing it took that to break my habit.

Just an observation - I don't know if this applies to you, or if it is even a common thing. Unfortunately in the victim's mind, Porn Addiction is a rather shameful thing. We don't hardly know how to post anything on it - so we avoid it.

Lizzy

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Guest mia 1

Equivocating a bit. Never went to porn site until this past November.

I hadn't cross dressed for nearly 19 yrs. and although the thoughts were there I kept away from my natural self. When I started actively dressing the first thing I did was go to the she male sites and that lasted about two weeks.

Somehow by the luck of "Goggle" I found Laura's. Never went back to the porn, found wonderful friends a gender therapist through Laura's; also came out to my wife and discovered cross dressing was just a small part of my gender dysphoria. My wife is happy, my friends here have gotten to know who I am,and I can breath easier knowing that I'm not some weird "freak of nature' having a pity party for myself.

I just P.M.'d Laura yesterday about how happy I am and how the forum saved my self esteem, my marriage and my mental health.

So no porn for me,,,Thank You Thank You Thank You,,,,Mwaaaa Mia.

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Guest CharliTo

I once considered calling a transgender prostitute one time.... just to talk with them and find things out.

Yeah, that was about the time when I figured that I totally needed help...at the right place.

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Guest Tiger

Wow thanks for all the support and replies everyone. Sally you really did put it into perspective for me. I was in the same boat, I had to drink at least 1 to 2 liters of coke or Dr. pepper everyday, I could not stand the taste of anything else, especially water. I now find my self drinking mineral water with a squeeze of lemon and it has helped me drop allot of weight as well. I will now work on the same thing, replacing my porn addiction with something else... Wish me luck :)

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Guest Rain

I would say I have a porn addiction to certain extent. I enjoy watching it I guess. I normally can write on and on, but for some reason I am having a hard time explaining myself. I am very new to this site so here it goes. I do not know if I have an addiction, I normally look at some form of porn every day. Whenever I look at "heterosexual porn" I think to myself ya whatever been there done that. When I look at trans gender porn, (this may sound weird) I think how beautiful they look, and I think why can I look like that. I grew up in a very religious home, and if I ever told my parents that I think was supposed be girl, my dad would probably take me out back and shoot me old yellor style. I do not know if this is even the right place to be talking about this. I guess porn got me thinking. I have always felt a little off like something was not right. I have heard so many stories about people feeling like something was not right and how they were born in the wrong body. Hearing these things, I would just think what a load of crap, we are who we are supposed to be. Now I see how foolish and judgmental I was. I always thought God would smite me if I felt the way I do. Now I think, if God does not understand, then how is he God. Ill just stop here in fear of getting too far off topic. Who knows if any of this makes sense.

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Guest mia 1

Porn is surprisingly addictive and alluring to those who feel the need for companionship..it is also surprisingly reduntant and boring after a certain time frame...so even though it can be "fun" for some and an addictive life style for others most can walk away from it...thank god...and then there is the Real life forum here and real feedback,,

My thought is how can anyone send there credit card over an ineternet site that deals is in a somewhat"illicit" industry? Mia

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Guest

Many don't realize that many porn sites make their memberships and email publically searchable which makes it appear on the internet. So much for the plain brown wrapper. Imagine if a potential employer finds this information. Always check a sites privacy policy. In addition the odds of you getting a virus or trojan are greatly increased.

Laura

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Guest Elizabeth K

Rain

This is to you.

You hit the nail squarely on the head! WOW

Where are your other posts? You need to participate EVERYWHERE on Laura's!

IMPRESSED!

Lizzy

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Guest Rain
Rain

This is to you.

You hit the nail squarely on the head! WOW

Where are your other posts? You need to participate EVERYWHERE on Laura's!

IMPRESSED!

Lizzy

Thank you I really appreciate that, I definitely will be participating. Thanks again.

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Guest Jean Davis

Well, I'm not a sex/porn addict (well below normal sex drive), but I do have an addiction (tobacco) and I know how hard it is to kick the crutch out from under you. So I definately think a support group would be important for many people.

P.S. this is going to have to count for my vote since I didn't quite know how to answer that second question. ;)

Jean Davis

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Guest SaraNetherlands

It does sound useful, I too have moments where I get out of control. For me the difference lies between watching pretty nude, where I appreciate nudity for it's beauty and somehow shifting over to pornography (this latter makes me unhappy). Such a group does seem useful.

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Guest nova

It seems like porn is everywhere. When i drop by my friends room for a chat, he's always got porn running on a TV with no sound, it's like 24/7. I dated a few guys who always wanted to look at porn on the internet when we were in for the evening. i had a friend who stayed with me briefly, and I discovered that he had set up his own account on my computer, and had downloaded tons of bondage stuff. I kicked him out, and he had the nerve to ask me to email some of his pictures to him when he was at a public library computer terminal in Berkeley! I told him I erased his "pictures" as soon as I found them, and, oooh . . . was he mad!! A few tenants from time to time invite me to there room to watch "you know--movies", but that will never happen. I have two adult DVDs that have been sitting around for the last four years, it just doesn't interest me much anymore.

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Guest Elizabeth K
It seems like porn is everywhere. When i drop by my friends room for a chat, he's always got porn running on a TV with no sound, it's like 24/7. I dated a few guys who always wanted to look at porn on the internet when we were in for the evening. i had a friend who stayed with me briefly, and I discovered that he had set up his own account on my computer, and had downloaded tons of bondage stuff. I kicked him out, and he had the nerve to ask me to email some of his pictures to him when he was at a public library computer terminal in Berkeley! I told him I erased his "pictures" as soon as I found them, and, oooh . . . was he mad!! A few tenants from time to time invite me to there room to watch "you know--movies", but that will never happen. I have two adult DVDs that have been sitting around for the last four years, it just doesn't interest me much anymore.

Nova? It happened to me kinda like that. I guess we became female somewhere along the way - not surprisingly I suppose. It is a strange thing - I have an old computer - 10 years old, that I opened up to see what was on it? Oh my goodness - the bookmarks! I can't event look at most of that anymore - the sites can look at now are those captioned images for TS - how dumb they seem now.

So we moved on I believe - or jumped the fence - or something?

Lizzy

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Guest Selkia
Tiger,

I find myself being viewed as standing on the ouside looking in - I don't have any recognized addictions, never smoked, drank, used drugs, gambled or watched porn - so what could I know about addictions?

I didn't reach 360 pounds by just eatting a little too much every now and then - no, I had what one would have to call an addiction to carbinated drinks, colas in particular. If I had a meal, I had a coke - even at breakfast, if I had a snack there was a coke - I couldn't eat ice cream unless it was in a glass with Root Beer poured over it (Haven't had a Black Cow in over a year). I drink an average of one glass of a carbonatrd soft drink once every ten days or so - where I used to drink a two litter bottle every day. How did I break the addiction and it was a true addiction, I substituted - when I sat down to eat I would automatically reach for a cola so I replaced that cola with tea or fruit juice - I had to really think about it but I was able to do it, now I have tea, juice or water with my meals, I only have a coke for an occasional treat. I am dow to 328 just by not drinking colas.

Find something to replace porn when you aren't doing anything else - you are just watching it out of habbit and your addiction at this point. You are feeling so much guilt for not being able to stop that you don't actually derive any pleasure from it now, so find something that is constructive or needs to be done and when the urge strikes, force yourself to do that instead. I am working on snacking now (still fighting the weight) and everytime I feel the urge to snack, I start straightening something - not only will I lose weight but I will have the cleanest house on the planet!

I hope that was of some help to you, Tiger, but the only way it can work is if you really want it to.

Love ya,

Sally

oh wow o.o; never knew carbinated drinks made you gain weigh...^^; well that explains why I have been gaining alot of weigh .___. *sigh* I am addicted to carbinated drinks too...I have been drinking 1 - 2 2L bottles of pop daily...when I think of something to drink I think POP! theres nothing else...:/ and i guess it doesn't help I know where to get carbinated drinks for next to nothing >___< I have over 20 bottles here...guess it's sorta like my addiction to chocolate....o___o; and it all started with me winning a 2 KG bar of milk chocolate...and my addiction to coffee....where i was drinking 6-7 cups a day....and before that a addiction energy drinks... It's odd though...I seem to get addicted to "treats" and junk food more then drugs...-___- not gonna lie i have tried drugs...lots of drugs...and never really did them again other then smoking...and drinking... but I was able to break those with will power thats really all I need i suppose if you don't have the will to stop the addiction you will never stop it..one must be open to help before they can recieve it..

~Sel

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Guest Christine Beatty

Let's first backup here and define "addiction." I'd imagine that if she knew little of her husband's interests, the CD's wife would freak out and might even be tempted to apply the label "addiction" to what may merely be an interest. How much porn constitutes an addiction? A couple hours a day? If someone sat down after work and watched three hours of television every night, would that be a TV addiction? Until some meaningful definitions can be applied, "addiction" is nothing more than an inflammatory label that pathologizes people. And from the point of view of someone recovering from an actual addiction, they might be inclined to a zero-tolerance POV such that they anyone who partakes to be addicted. AA's Big Book notes, "We are careful never to show intolerance or hatred of drinking as an institution. Experience shows that such an attitude is not helpful to anyone."

I offer these two somewhat subjective criteria to self-diagnosis of an addiction, backed by decades in and out (mostly in) of recovery from substances:

1) Is the behavior negatively impacting a person's life (marriage, children, health, job, etc.)?

2) Is the person unable to stop in spite of the negative impact?

If someone is giving themselves blisters self gratification, staying up half the night porn watching, neglecting family or work, that is clearly an addiction. Finding some "crossdresser" porn and membership websites on their computer is much more open to debate. Clearly this is an important conversation because porn can be a very problematic addiction (I had a good friend fired because he couldn't help watching porn on his company computer despite previous warnings), but using a diagnosis emotionally — and an addiction is a diagnosis — tends to take some of the meaning away from the term.

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Guest Captain Troy

I do like internet porn quite a bit. Don't think I'm addicted now that I think about, but either way, I don't think I need to stop looking at it.

Yes, I know it's illegal, you have to be eighteen to view that stuff, but hey, what sixteen year old boy hasn't taken a peek at some of the less savory parts of the internet?

I do however have an addiction to attention, to the point where if I don't get any, I'll cause trouble just so someone will pay me attention.

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Guest Sakura_Stingray

my mom's current b/f that turns out to my mom's husband around the time i was born(but she claims hes not my father) has a major obsession with trans-porn... my mom knows it.. i know it.. and it freaks me out.. I try everything i can to not give hints to him about me and so far it has worked... he is the only obsticle i have with everything and it seems to be a biiiiiiiig road bump.. he freaks the heck out of me sometimes.. hes self rightious..everything he says has to be right.. a controll freak and all other things that could make someone appear scary.... so if anyone lives with this type of stress give me some helpful info XD

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Guest mia 1

INTERNET porn is at first intriguing, but it is so repetitious, I lost interest..Now I have no interest at all, and it was a mere couple of months for me.

If there is no interaction,,I lose interst,,pick up my marbles and go home.

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Guest MissAmy

I don't really have an addiction, it's actually been a few days since I been doing the nasty to porn. It's gets boring sometimes but I like to jump between genres every now and then.

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Guest Wanderer

I don't really have an addiction, but I love the idea of a support group for those with the problem. I mean... I don't think I have one. I look at a little most days, and occasionally two and rarely three times in one day, but have never really had trouble not having it.... Oh dear though, I might have an addiction to self gratification, which I guess is really the same problem all-in-all. I'm just not typically in a situation where the addiction can cause me harm. x/

xP At least, on the bright side, I have a good imagination.... But yeah, I'm all for this group, and may occasionally seek support with it. =3

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