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Violence And Hate Crimes Against The Transgendered

Have you been the victim of violence or a hate crime?  

119 members have voted

  1. 1. Do you know a transgender victim of violence or a hate crime?

    • Yes
      71
    • No
      48
  2. 2. Have you been the victim of violence or a hate crime?

    • Yes
      46
    • No
      73


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Guest

Almost every day on this planet at least one Transgender person somewhere will be the victim of violence, rape or Hate crimes. This happens to both Transmen and Transwomen. Yet if you were to check factual reported statistics it appears to be low. While the FBI keeps violent crime statistics against Gays and Lesbians it does not against Transgender persons. We are ignored by our own Government. In the case of Brandon Teena a Transman who was raped and later murdered reporting the original crime was ignored by the Police Department and Brandon was even blamed for it by the town's sherriff. http://www.trutv.com/library/crime/notorio.../brandon/1.html . The perpatrators were not arrested at the time of the complaint leading to his murder within days. While this case was sensationalized the press leads us to believe that this was a rare incident. The truth is it was not. Incidents like this happen every day and have happened to over 2000 users who have written me in four years. Except for a few of these cases most were not reported and those that were had been treated like it was their fault. Some were even victims of the Police Themselves. What of the victims who couldn't write because they were dead. Families tend not to report their child was gay or transgendered because they are embarrassed so often the truth is hidden under the rug. Then there are those who prefer not to have their names publicized with the Transgender label next to it because they are stealth and wish to remain that way.

This is a forum not only for transgender victims to tell their story and be supported anonymously but for us as a community to discuss the heinous vilolence committed against our members every day. The first step in fighting hate crimes is to openly talk about it and show the true numbers of how much this occurs. Few have any idea the violence against us is not rare. There was not only Brandon Teena there are thousands of more victims that suffer silently. Tell us your story. Discuss violent hate crimes against Transgenders here.

I am working on a new Hate Crimes section that will open shortly on the Articles page. We can stay silent no longer.

Laura

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Guest Ryan

Yeah, this is a tremendous problem. According to the National Coalition of Anti-Violence Programs, there has been a 24% increase in anti-GLBTQ violence in the last year in the US. And, of course, transgender people are disproportionately affected by this violence.

I have been a victim of violence - nothing too severe, but enough to get me pretty shook up. It's rough, and I can only imagine what it is like for the many others who have it far worse than I do.

If you have been a victim of a hate crime or hate incident, please report it. As Laura said, violence against trans people, even hate crimes, are not recorded by the national government because trans people are not protected by federal hate crime legislation. However, it's important to have records of the violence committed against us. It's also really empowering to report, especially if you have been a victim. You can report hate crimes or hate incidents online here . There's another reporting form at www.hcdn.org, but I haven't been able to access that page recently.

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Guest Ryan

Ooh, actually, here's a better, more extensive reporting form. Go to www.ncavp.org, and at the top of the page there is a PDF file labeled 2007 Report on LGBT Domestic Violence (but it's mislabeled - the report is actually on hate crimes and bias incidents). Click on it, and on the last few pages of the document is a form that you can fill out and send to the National Coalition of Anti-Violence Programs. The rest of the document is worth reading, too.

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Guest SharleahLynn

We do need protection fromthese horrendous doings and it is so very understandable the fear one goes through when this happens to themselves . We all DO need to make our voices heard and make the laws extend to protect us as well, after all , we are citizens of this so called free country. So we should have the same protection as everyone else, what is fair for one needs to be fair for all, or at least that is what I was taught . What all can be done to get the laws to include us as citizens to be protected by these same laws that protect the very ones that commit these dastardly deeds?

SharleahLynn

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Guest Just_Call_Me_Nick

We need protection!!!

Hate crime is a hate crime it should be for everyone...

I myself suffered from a hate crime and not even a dang report was made...

I while living in that small town back in Ms...was thrown out of a market window...and my shoulder was dislocated....and the only reason I was done in such a way was because hating "someone like me" was not against the law!

We need laws for everyone...

Nick~

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Guest Stephanie Butterfield
We need protection!!!

Hate crime is a hate crime it should be for everyone...

I myself suffered from a hate crime and not even a dang report was made...

I while living in that small town back in Ms...was thrown out of a market window...and my shoulder was dislocated....and the only reason I was done in such a way was because hating "someone like me" was not against the law!

We need laws for everyone...

Nick~

Hi Nick,

Ditto, I am trying to work with the police on a better understanding of trans people, but its not easy when the cheif constable sits in his ivory tower and won't meet people like me. He'll go on local television and radio to herald new low crime figures, but I've pointed out to them that they do not publish trans hate crime statistics, as they are burried in other catogories.

Its rumoured he is on his way out, if so, I would very much like to meet the new incumbent to see that the diversity measures i've recommended are implemented, but that that is just a start. I know its not easy for them, finances are tight which is why cso's are being deloyed, but as a result, we've lost the community beat officers, who had full police powers, nowadays they seem to all be in cars and are never there when you need them.

I no longer bother to report hate crime as nothing is ever done to stamp it out. I am regularly abused in my estate by kids as young as 3 to older teens who want to kill me "their words not mine" my house has been targetted 4 times attacked on 3 of those occasions, i've been bottled, stoned, beaten up, threatened with actual physical violence in a pub, and get this, the police asked me to leave and the abuser and his family were allowed to stay and drink up and finish their meal.

Life in the North East of England is hard for the non passable TS

Stephanie

Stephanie

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Guest sar-bear

im sorry if i dont spell right im crying ... thats horrbilye!!! i dont even know why im replying well i think that the people who do such horrible crimes will be punshed by threefold.

well

goddess bless

love sarah

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Guest mtf_Emily

I don't hate the people who commit the crimes, i hate what they have done, it doesn't matter what you believe, if you are a neo cup cake or a christian or wiccan, nothing gives anyone the right to harm someone else just because you don't like how they want to live their life, my life is none of their business.

I was assaulted by 5 or 6 neo cup cake skinheads on the subway in boston, I was left for dead and hospitalized for 3 days, they never got caught, they never got looked for. I still don't really hate them, but I cannot say i would forgive them yet, I'll never be the same again, I'm too fearful to even try to pass for a woman, and I know I could easily, I did for 3 years. The cops need to be more accepting of us, PROTECT AND SERVE, not just the middle and upper class NORMAL people, ALL OF US

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Guest Kiera

November 20th is the transgender day of rememberence, please show your support for this important global wake.

Kiera

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Guest Tommy

omg that post i made is awful

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MaryEllen

Hi Tommy,

You were only showing how you were feeling. It's not an awful post.

Hugs,

MaryEllen :)

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Guest julia_d

Reposted :)

Homicide Victim Identified as Transgendered Person, Duanna Johnson

Reported by: Jill Margetts

Email: JMargetts@...

Contributor: Shane Myers

Eyewitness News Memphis, USA

November 10, 2008

http://www.myeyewitnessnews.com/news/local...33-2b9f8fca3018

MEMPHIS, TN - Duanna Johnson was found shot to death in North

Memphis, according to her lawyer.

Memphis police say it happened just before midnight at Hollywood

near Staten Avenue, Sunday, November 9, 2008.

According to detectives, when officers arrived at the scene, they

found the body lying in the street. Police say a witness heard

gunfire and then saw three people running away from the scene.

Investigators do not have any suspects at this time.

Lawyer Murray Wells confirmed to Eyewitness News that the person who

was killed is his client Duanna Johnson. He says Johnson was often

in the area where she was killed.

Murray says Johnson was trying to leave Memphis and go back to her

hometown of Chicago. According to Murray, Jonson was just about

homeless trying to live in Memphis. He says the apartment where

Jonson was living did not have power. Murray says he was helping

Johnson buy a bus ticket to Chicago.

Johnson was the subject of an alleged video taped beating that

happened in June of 2008. Johnson, who had been arrested on a

prostitution charge, said former Memphis Police Officer Bridges

McRae beat her after making derogatory remarks about her sexuality.

Johnson said another man, Officer J. Swain, held her down during the

beating. Both officers were fired from the department.

Johnson was suing the city for $1.3 million.

Memphis Police are asking anyone with information about Duanna

Johnson's death to call Crime Stoppers at (901) 528-CASH.

http://www.myeyewitnessnews.com/mediacente...video.abc24.com

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Guest April63

Well unfortunately, we can't control everyone's lives, thoughts, and actions. Bad things happen, and there's nothing we can do except try to stop it from happening again.

April

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Guest julia_d

Memphis Transgender Day of Remembrance

Saturday, November 22

4 pm

Tom Lee Park

357 Riverside Drive

Memphis, TN 38103

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Guest silverpetals

Gender motive in death, cops say

Dwight DeLee is accused of killing Moses Cannon, 22, who was a transsexual.

Monday, November 17, 2008

By Matt Michael

Staff writer

this article

previous article, for context

Syracuse police are saying what the family of Moses "Teish" Cannon believed all along: Cannon was shot and killed Friday because of his sexual orientation.

Police have charged Dwight R. DeLee, of Syracuse, with Cannon's murder. DeLee, 20, is scheduled to be arraigned on a second-degree murder charge today in Syracuse City Court.

Cannon and his brother, Mark Cannon, both of 404 Arthur St., were shot with a .22-caliber rifle as they sat in a parked car in front of 411 Seymour St. about 8:45 p.m. Friday. The bullet grazed the left arm of Mark Cannon, who was in the driver's seat, and hit Moses Cannon in the chest, police said.

The brothers drove to 411 Seymour St. to attend a party. DeLee went into the house to get the rifle after guests started "making profane and vulgar comments in regards to the sexual preference of our two victims," Syracuse police Chief Gary Miguel said.

Moses Cannon, 22, often dressed like a woman and had a boyfriend. Family members called Cannon "Teish" and used "she" when speaking about him. Shaconia Williams,

Cannon's sister, said Cannon called himself a transsexual.

Mark Cannon, 18, said Sunday that he and Moses did not know DeLee, although they had seen him around the neighborhood. Sgt. Tom Connellan, speaking for the police, said Moses Cannon was not wearing women's clothing Friday night.

"There was no previous argument between these individuals, there was no previous fight, there was no bad blood," Miguel said. "Our suspect took a rifle and shot and killed this person, also wounding his brother, for the sole reason he didn't care for the sexual preference of our victim. Isn't that sad? Isn't that a sad situation that that's the sole reason why?

"I talk to you about this atmosphere of violence and that certain individuals believe that violence is the answer no matter what, and here's just another example," Miguel added.

From the outset, Cannon's family said his death should be treated as a hate crime. Family members said Sunday that DeLee's arrest did not give them any comfort.

"I don't understand. It was 8:30 at night, and they weren't causing any trouble," said Williams, . "You can put (DeLee) away for 1,000 years, and it's not going to make up for what happened."

Onondaga County District Attorney William Fitzpatrick said if his investigators determine the killing was a hate crime, his office will ask a grand jury to consider it. A hate crime is not a separate murder charge, Fitzpatrick said, but it would increase the minimum penalty from 15 years to life to 20 years to life.

Fitzpatrick said his office is still investigating. He said it's possible other people were involved and additional charges could be brought against DeLee.

Police started searching for DeLee after interviewing witnesses. He was located at 2 a.m. Sunday at a residence in Liverpool, police said.

Police listed DeLee's home address as 420 Gifford St., which is the address for the Altamont Program, an alcohol and drug abuse treatment facility. A phone call to the facility's director was not returned Sunday. Police said DeLee had prior convictions on weapon and drug charges.

Miguel said there's no indication the Cannons were lured to the party so they could be assaulted. "The person who called (to invite them to the party) is a friend," Miguel said.

Cannon's death marks the 18th homicide in Syracuse, Connellan said.

Moses and Mark Cannon often hung out together, and family members referred to them as "Bonnie and Clyde." They described "Teish" as someone who loved family and helping others.

"I'm angry. It wasn't her time to go," said Tameka Johnson, Cannon's sister. "She was so full of life and had so much left to give."

Cannon's loss leaves a void in the family that's going to be hard to fill, relatives said. On Sunday, nearly 20 relatives and friends gathered at Cannon's home to comfort each other and share stories about "Teish."

"She was always there for me," said Cannon's niece, Maniya Cannon, 10. "She would do anything to help other people."

Matt Michael can be reached at 470-3085 or mmichael@syracuse.com.

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Guest Karen-1954

I used to think a lot about the 3 people that jumped me as I was leaving a store, they had me down in the parking lot and were kicking me when 2 young men came to my rescue. Now days I try to simply remember the 2 brave guys that saved me instead of the 3 that attacked me. By the way, the police and the store had the attitude of "so what".

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Guest Donna Jean

Karen..I am so sorry to hear what happened to you and even madder to hear of the conclusion!

My god, when is this world going to wake up and realize? But, you cannot reason with

knuckle draggers :angry:

I'm happy that you're ok, but....really upset that it happened at all...

I really don't want to get started.......

Peace....

Donna Jean

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Guest Zoharstoi
Hi Nick,

Ditto, I am trying to work with the police on a better understanding of trans people, but its not easy when the cheif constable sits in his ivory tower and won't meet people like me. He'll go on local television and radio to herald new low crime figures, but I've pointed out to them that they do not publish trans hate crime statistics, as they are burried in other catogories.

Its rumoured he is on his way out, if so, I would very much like to meet the new incumbent to see that the diversity measures i've recommended are implemented, but that that is just a start. I know its not easy for them, finances are tight which is why cso's are being deloyed, but as a result, we've lost the community beat officers, who had full police powers, nowadays they seem to all be in cars and are never there when you need them.

I no longer bother to report hate crime as nothing is ever done to stamp it out. I am regularly abused in my estate by kids as young as 3 to older teens who want to kill me "their words not mine" my house has been targetted 4 times attacked on 3 of those occasions, i've been bottled, stoned, beaten up, threatened with actual physical violence in a pub, and get this, the police asked me to leave and the abuser and his family were allowed to stay and drink up and finish their meal.

Life in the North East of England is hard for the non passable TS

Stephanie

Stephanie

Has anyone been to Peter Gabriel Focus Site. I follow the links from a Cell camera story on BBC about his backing

of "Witness" a site for people around the world to use cell cameras/video 'corders to send instantly such bad behavior

to this E-Place. The Tech nowdays makes us live in a glass house where everyone can see if one looks. :mellow:

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Guest julia_d

I hope nobody minds me posting these general press releases. I think they are of enough "general interest" to warrant the copy/paste of the full articles.

Tennessee Transgender Political Coalition

For Immediate Release: Dated December 27, 2008

Another Transgender Woman Shot in Memphis

On Christmas Eve, a Memphis television station reported the shooting of Leeneshia Edwards in Memphis. She becomes the third transgender woman shot in Memphis in just six months. At last report, Leeneshia is in critical condition. We extend our hopes and prayers to Leenashia for a speedy recovery.

We also ask for anyone with any information about this latest crime to call Memphis Crimes Stoppers at (901)528-CASH.

The shooting of Leeneshia Edwards helps shed light on a disturbing trend in Memphis. Transgender women who work in the sex industry in order to survive are now being targeted by a pervasive culture of violence.

The indifferent attitude of law enforcement towards the February 16, 2006, murder of Tiffany Berry, and the February 12, 2008, beating of Duanna Johnson by Memphis Police Department officers, has sent a message that the lives of transgender people are not important. This has fed the culture of violence that has permeated the second half of 2008, and is exemplified by the July 1 murder of Ebony Whitaker, the July 28 murder of Dre-Ona Blake, a two year old girl who was killed by the man who had previously been charged with the murder of Tiffany Berry, but was allowed to walk free for two and a half years, the November 9 murder of Duanna Johnson, and now the shooting of Leeneshia Edwards.

This open season on transgender people in Memphis and elsewhere, regardless of whether or not they engage in sex work, must come to an end right now.

We call on business people who refuse to hire transgender people to open their doors immediately to transgender workers so there are alternatives to working on the streets.

We call on shelters that routinely turn away transgender people who are seeking help, to open their doors so that transgender people do not have to live on the streets.

We call on religious leaders who preach intolerance towards crossdressers and transsexuals from the pulpit to cease immediately and begin preaching messages of love and acceptance of diversity.

We call on political leaders of all parties to stop campaigning against transgender people and start supporting fully inclusive employment non-discrimination and hate crimes legislation to show that the lives of transgender people have value.

Marisa Richmond

President

The Tennessee Transgender Political Coalition (TTPC) is an organization designed to educate and advocate on behalf of transgender related legislation at the Federal, State and local levels. TTPC is dedicated to raising public awareness and building alliances with other organizations concerned with equal rights legislation.

For more information, or to make a donation, contact:

Tennessee Transgender Political Coalition (TTPC)

P.O. Box 92335

Nashville, TN 37209

http://ttgpac.com

TTGPAC@aol.com

(615)293-6199

(615)353-1834 fax.

I was nearly a statistic 2 weeks ago.. That's why I have been rather quiet on the forums. Still getting over being attacked in a strange town one night when I had no alternative but to travel alone after dark.. and then the night after in my home town when I was just set on for no reason whatsoever by a group of thugs. Jumped from behind and hit over the head with a bottle or something.. My past life as door security at a rock club saved my skin again.. I don't like using the skills learned i that life.. they have saved me on a few occasions before in similar situations.. It seems I can read which one to take out to frighten the others off...but it was scary getting home and seeing all the blood in my hair from the large cut caused by whatever it was they hit me with.. Again police attitude was "so what" and they wanted to arrest me for causing a bruise to one of the thugs.. until they say the size of the lump and cut on my head... and the fact it was 3 or 4 on 1. It's all a little hazy..

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Guest SuperFlyGal

I was in SF a couple of years ago visiting, I believe, the LGBT Community Center. Two of the guys were talking about how they had found "another" dead and naked on the street. When I asked what it was about they told me that a pre-transitioned MtF was killed and the cops say she was being raped when the guy found out and killed her for it.

They said it wasn't the first time a TG MtF had been killed for the same reason.

It got me a little scared being there, but I've known how dangerous some of the streets in SF can be at dark, I was even given warnings on which ones to avoid while there.

It was still rather sad to hear about, murdering someone for such a reason so callously.

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Guest CharliTo
I was in SF a couple of years ago visiting, I believe, the LGBT Community Center. Two of the guys were talking about how they had found "another" dead and naked on the street. When I asked what it was about they told me that a pre-transitioned MtF was killed and the cops say she was being raped when the guy found out and killed her for it.

They said it wasn't the first time a TG MtF had been killed for the same reason.

It got me a little scared being there, but I've known how dangerous some of the streets in SF can be at dark, I was even given warnings on which ones to avoid while there.

It was still rather sad to hear about, murdering someone for such a reason so callously.

It is...It just doesn't make sense. :( May her rest in peace...

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Guest nova

I live in the same building I moved into when I first came to San Francisco. So a lot of tenants got to witness a large part of my medical transition. The only people who don't know I'm trans are new people who move in and if they don't figure it out, someone will be sure to tell them. So I never know how a new tenant is going to behave around me. One day last year, I was in the building's elevator, and when I got to my floor and the door opened, one of the new tenants was standing there, blocking my way. He said I was sick and that he was going to kill me and he was going to make sure that it happened "soon". I called the police and when they came it looked like it was going to be a waste of time. But then this guy came downstairs and I said "that's him!". He admitted to the police that he had plans to kill me!!. He was arrested and eventually was committed to the state mental hospital for 3 years. The police told me that he just doesn't understand that he can't go around threatening to kill people. He was convicted of making criminal threats, and charged with a hate crime. One of the other tenants later told me that the guy was "just" high on crack, and "probably" didn't mean what he said!!! I feel fortunate that this time the perpetrator didn't get away with it, and, I can start looking for a new place to move to because I qualify for relocation expenses paid for through the victim's defense fund. I also feel lucky to be alive.--Nova

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Guest Valentine
Gender motive in death, cops say

Dwight DeLee is accused of killing Moses Cannon, 22, who was a transsexual.

Monday, November 17, 2008

By Matt Michael

Staff writer

this article

previous article, for context

[Article snipped]

An update on this case.

Judge allows DeLee murder case to go forward as a hate crime prosecution

by Jim O'Hara / The Post-Standard

Thursday June 04, 2009, 10:36 AM

Syracuse, NY -- County Judge William Walsh today upheld the constitutionality of the state's hate crime law in the murder prosecution of Dwight DeLee.

DeLee is charged with second-degree murder as a hate crime in the Nov. 14 shooting death of Moses Cannon. Cannon was described by his family as a transsexual who went by the name Latiesha "Teish" Green. The prosecution contends the victim was targeted because of sexual orientation.

Defense lawyer Clarence Johnson had asked Walsh to find the hate crime law unconstitutionally vague and general and unconstitutional in its specific application to DeLee.

Chief Assistant District Attorney Matthew Doran defended the statute and the prosecution of DeLee in court this morning.

After listening to the legal arguments, Walsh sided with the prosecution and allowed the case to go forward as a hate crime murder prosecution.

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Guest Esperanza Xochitl

I don't like to talk about it much, but I've been attacked. I've had friends of mine who had been attacked. I shouldn't speak for them, but I've learned to defend myself. I think I'll leave it at that.

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Guest Esperanza Xochitl
I hope nobody minds me posting these general press releases. I think they are of enough "general interest" to warrant the copy/paste of the full articles.

Tennessee Transgender Political Coalition

For Immediate Release: Dated December 27, 2008

Another Transgender Woman Shot in Memphis

On Christmas Eve, a Memphis television station reported the shooting of Leeneshia Edwards in Memphis. She becomes the third transgender woman shot in Memphis in just six months. At last report, Leeneshia is in critical condition. We extend our hopes and prayers to Leenashia for a speedy recovery.

We also ask for anyone with any information about this latest crime to call Memphis Crimes Stoppers at (901)528-CASH.

The shooting of Leeneshia Edwards helps shed light on a disturbing trend in Memphis. Transgender women who work in the sex industry in order to survive are now being targeted by a pervasive culture of violence.

The indifferent attitude of law enforcement towards the February 16, 2006, murder of Tiffany Berry, and the February 12, 2008, beating of Duanna Johnson by Memphis Police Department officers, has sent a message that the lives of transgender people are not important. This has fed the culture of violence that has permeated the second half of 2008, and is exemplified by the July 1 murder of Ebony Whitaker, the July 28 murder of Dre-Ona Blake, a two year old girl who was killed by the man who had previously been charged with the murder of Tiffany Berry, but was allowed to walk free for two and a half years, the November 9 murder of Duanna Johnson, and now the shooting of Leeneshia Edwards.

This open season on transgender people in Memphis and elsewhere, regardless of whether or not they engage in sex work, must come to an end right now.

We call on business people who refuse to hire transgender people to open their doors immediately to transgender workers so there are alternatives to working on the streets.

We call on shelters that routinely turn away transgender people who are seeking help, to open their doors so that transgender people do not have to live on the streets.

We call on religious leaders who preach intolerance towards crossdressers and transsexuals from the pulpit to cease immediately and begin preaching messages of love and acceptance of diversity.

We call on political leaders of all parties to stop campaigning against transgender people and start supporting fully inclusive employment non-discrimination and hate crimes legislation to show that the lives of transgender people have value.

Marisa Richmond

President

The Tennessee Transgender Political Coalition (TTPC) is an organization designed to educate and advocate on behalf of transgender related legislation at the Federal, State and local levels. TTPC is dedicated to raising public awareness and building alliances with other organizations concerned with equal rights legislation.

For more information, or to make a donation, contact:

Tennessee Transgender Political Coalition (TTPC)

P.O. Box 92335

Nashville, TN 37209

http://ttgpac.com

TTGPAC@aol.com

(615)293-6199

(615)353-1834 fax.

I was nearly a statistic 2 weeks ago.. That's why I have been rather quiet on the forums. Still getting over being attacked in a strange town one night when I had no alternative but to travel alone after dark.. and then the night after in my home town when I was just set on for no reason whatsoever by a group of thugs. Jumped from behind and hit over the head with a bottle or something.. My past life as door security at a rock club saved my skin again.. I don't like using the skills learned i that life.. they have saved me on a few occasions before in similar situations.. It seems I can read which one to take out to frighten the others off...but it was scary getting home and seeing all the blood in my hair from the large cut caused by whatever it was they hit me with.. Again police attitude was "so what" and they wanted to arrest me for causing a bruise to one of the thugs.. until they say the size of the lump and cut on my head... and the fact it was 3 or 4 on 1. It's all a little hazy..

I heard that the Memphis chapter of Bash Back! took action in response to the murder of Duanna Johnson.

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      First of all Welcome! It's great to have you here! I have deleted and or walked away from many many posts, cause sometimes my mind wants to say a whole bunch, sometimes it flows, and sometimes it gets all tangled up. After i come back and read a bit more in here, i find i am able to write most of what I wanted to say in the post. Sometimes I "ramble on," but I feel better getting it out, instead of bottling it up. The TP community helps me with my thoughts and questions, and later I can see what and how i was thinking.  As abstract as you might think your thoughts are, they will make sense to us, cause we are and have been where you are right now, in some form shape and manner,   we either understand and/or can be here for you to help. (I hope all of that made sense, lol)  
    • Ellora
      The Answer depends on the individual. For some people. their bodies might respond quickly, others not for years. I am 53 and have been on HRT for a little over 4 months and counting. I had an Orchiectomy a little over a month ago, and I am T free. I feel that My hips are starting to show, but not to anyone else. I can see slow breast growth happening , but only one comment about "have i been working out?" But thats Me, you and everyone else will probably have a different response. Speak with a Gender Therapist and your Doctor (that is fluent with the LGBTQ community), so they can help you with your journey. Continue researching until You are comfortable with your decisions. If you decide to start HRT, and do not like the way you look and or feel, then talk to your doctor, or stop all together.  Since you have a "year or two," you have plenty of time to do your research and talk to the GD therapist and your Doctor.  Best of luck in  your Journey!
    • Nebulous
      Facial hair is no longer my “beard”- pun intended as I’ve had laser hair removal. I guess my main question from here is the question of when the curves:fat redistribution and breasts became harder to hide. I do eventually want to live full time. I just won’t be ready to make that leap for another year or two though.
    • Dain
      Thank you all so much for the warm welcome!   I'm really looking forward to dive in! Just need to sort out my thoughts into words first. I find myself wanting to write something only to end up in a haze of abstract thoughts unsure of how to translate it into language.  I struggle a lot to articulate myself, so it's nice to be in a safe space like this to try and express myself and get input from other transgender peers.   Thank you! ❤️
    • Charlize
      It is most likely possible to be on HRT for a long time without being noticed.  Remember we have many FTM members here who pass by binding etc.   Remember baldness and a bit of beard screams male.  I would think a greater issue might be whether, after starting HRT, the desire to live as yourself wouldn't grow.   I know that when i was on HRT i had no desire to be seen as male but i suppose it is possible to be in the middle ground.  Don't forget that HRT also can affect sexual abilities, fertility and preferences for some.     Hugs,   Charlize
    • Timber Wolf
      Good morning everyone,🦄   Happy Birthday DaHudie Biz!🎂 Hope you have a great day!   Lots of love, Timber Wolf 🐾
    • Timber Wolf
      Hi Carol, Welcome to Transpulse. I'm glad you're here!   Lots of love, Timber Wolf 🐾
    • tracy_j
      Hi Carol,   Welcome!   Tracy
    • tracy_j
      Hi Dain,   Welcome!   Tracy
    • Alex C
      well I been on HRT and like Vicki I am stuck or set on B cup..I am small size o ( not bragging) and when I am not comfortable presenting as F..I wear Large shirts ..Vicki is also on the money with hair growth. I am bald , some hair is growing back but I relegated to wearing a wig until I die..good luck, be safe and stay proud  
    • Bananarama
      NS,   You could try looking at the following:   https://www.behindthename.com/top/lists/united-states/1980   Enter your birth year in the drop-down field, and then look through the top 1000 names that were most frequently used at the time (you can also sort the list alphabetically). If you have siblings, you could also use that as clues to what your parents might have used.   For example, my birth year was 1960, and my sister's name is Melissa. Taking that and clues of other family members led me to select 'Melanie' as a logical given name (ranked #125 on the list from the above site, and 'M-E-L' the clue from my sister). I then selected my mother's middle name 'Jean' for mine, thus I became Melanie Jean, which IMHO has a nice ring about it (it also happened to leave my initials intact, as my friends usually call me 'MJ').   Best wishes on whichever you decide. 🙂
    • Jani
      Hello Dain.   Welcome.  I read Devon's post and it was interesting.  I think you will find an accepting community here.  Please join in.   Jani
    • Jani
      I have been married for 44 years so I can attest to thinking at times that you're on the same wavelength when in fact you're are not.  Life and people are strange in that regard.   I think it may be time to have some serious dialogue about how he (and you) felt things have been going.     Also, in my opinion women are more prone to accept this change in a partner than men are.  Women can be close friends with each other without seeming sexual, while men never want to get too close so to not project the image of homosexuality.      
    • VickySGV
      By themselves you have a window of 3 to 6 months for the onset of action to 3 to 6 years to completion of the change per the WPATH Standards of Care.  It will also depend on the type of dressing you do at work.  Shirts and neck ties will be a problem a bit sooner, but T shirts and sweat shirts a lot longer.  A bigger issue is going to be our own nervousness and maybe a tad touchy PMS type day that will give you away.  Yes we do get mood swings pretty early in the game.  If you get in a hurry for longer hair , there goes another issue too.  Its not as bad as it was, but where I worked it could be anything from OK to physically dangerous is it was not kept right.  When I retired I had been on HRT for two years and it had not been a problem.  I have what I call family "B" cups since that is what my mother and sisters had, and loose shirts got along fine in two sizes larger than male me wore.  
    • Nebulous
      I know this is one of those mileage  varies questions- However, I cant help but ask- How long on HRT( assume( Sprio and Estrogen) before dressing in the old male attire and presenting male becomes a challenge? How long was it in your experience? I’m trying to get a good sense of when coworkers or other acquaintances might start noticing something being up.   Thanks in advance for the insight,   Dina
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