Mom, Dad, Family, Friends, Etc.

[Guest Madison_Always]

well im not exactly worried about God being angry at me about coming out and being a girl I mean He did create me but i am extrordinarily worried about my family and friends because of what they believe they know about the Bible wanting to change me, fix me or abandon me. Honestly the fear of my family wanting to fix me is why i am not out now. im just gathering my thoughts i guess (lots of stress like getting my wisdom teeth pulled in 8 hours and u know the whole born in the wrong body thing)

[Guest Chrissie]

well im not exactly worried about God being angry at me about coming out and being a girl I mean He did create me but i am extrordinarily worried about my family and friends because of what they believe they know about the Bible wanting to change me, fix me or abandon me. Honestly the fear of my family wanting to fix me is why i am not out now. im just gathering my thoughts i guess (lots of stress like getting my wisdom teeth pulled in 8 hours and u know the whole born in the wrong body thing)

Im glad you arent worried about God being mad at you for coming out... or being who you were meant to be.

Your perception of how your family and friends CAN react is spot on. The bible is often used by Christians, out of context, as justification for whatever damage they do. Im not sure about the particulars of your case so...

Don't let Fear of unwanted change or abandonment rule you. Tell your parents that you will accept what help they can provide, when they understand. Try explaining to them how it feels to feel trapped in the wrong body... and if all else fails bring them to the Chats and allow them to talk with the Moderators.

There are a lot of questions that they will ask, the best way is to be ready for them and answer them as honestly as possible. The Moderators can help you get ready for that as well. Honesty and Sincerity is always the best way to get acceptance. Its a long trip through Denial and several other states to acceptance, including anger but in the end If your family is an important part of your life it might be a trip you'll have to take them through.

[Guest Evan_J]

I'm glad also that you aren't worried about God.

I used to have a bunch of comments constantly made at me about how I should be be "working on my relationship with God" and "what my relationship with God should be like" and blah blah blah, and I gotta tell you one day it just flowed off my tongue "I do have a relationship with God, and me and God are the only ones who know exactly "what" that relationship is". You would be amazed at how "offended" people have the gall to look after you let em know that your relationship with the divine , whatever the heck it migh be is just that, YOURS. And they're not in it. This from people who had nerve enough to insinduate by action that they were

Not that that's what you should tell your parents by any stretch. The best route with them is likely a lot of what you've been doing; taking your time. Time and patience and not thinking theres something you can or should say to "change their minds". There minds are their own, just like yours is your own. When and if it gets to be time -and only you'll know if it is- then you'll give them the best information that you can. Just remember how much time, information, patience, understanding, and commitment it took for you to deal with it your own self and try to give them that. Remember, they don't even have the benefit of feeling it

Best of luck, and remember, you have to look out for yourself first, even if it means goin slow on letting all the others in on whats happening to you.

[Guest raydub]

Chrissie,

Much like what the others have said it relieves me greatly to hear that you arent worried about what God thinks of you - because he loves you NO MATTER WHAT. If anything, you parents should understand that God loves all of his children BECAUSE of who they are..not just in spite of who they are.

And if you believe in Him then you must understand that as He prepares you to come out to them, He will also prepare them in their own way. You may not understand or agree with their reaction - and it may not even be good.. but we must allow others to experience their world the way they know how. Even though they may not grant us the same. Take as long as YOU need to prepare to come out to the world. Dont worry about whether someone else is ready.. THIS if nothing else, is about YOU. Make sure YOU are in a position to handle whatever the response may be. Let God take care of the others.

There's some good advice about talking it over in chat. There are some bright and extremely kind people in there that can help you. Take care and enjoy the process as much as you can.

love,

Raymond

[Guest Madison_Always]

thank u guys sooooo much for your replies you guys have made me feel so much better u r right i ll let time and the Lord prepare me and my parents for the long road ahead and i cant help feeling that time is coming and thank u guys again for your wonderful replies.

love u guys

Chelsea

[Guest raydub]

I am just glad that we were able to help you and be here for you.

Raymond

[MaryEllen]

The next time your family gets on you about the Bible saying that you are a sinner and are going to burn in hell, ask them to show you in book, chapter and verse where it says that. There is nothing in the Bible that says being transsexual is a sin. The closest the Bible comes to it are mentions of eunuchs and barren women. Jesus said that all who believed in him would be saved and that included eunuchs and barren women. One example is the Ethiopian eunuch whom Philip met in the desert. He asked Philip to explain the scripture to him and when Philip did, he believed. Philip then took him down to the water and baptised him.

Acts 8:26-40

Philip and the Ethiopian Eunuch

8:26 Then an angel of the Lord 1 said to Philip, 2 “Get up and go south 3 on the road that goes down from Jerusalem 4 to Gaza.” (This is a desert 5 road.) 6 8:27 So 7 he got up 8 and went. There 9 he met 10 an Ethiopian eunuch, 11 a court official of Candace, 12 queen of the Ethiopians, who was in charge of all her treasury. He 13 had come to Jerusalem to worship, 14 8:28 and was returning home, sitting 15 in his chariot, reading 16 the prophet Isaiah. 8:29 Then the Spirit said to Philip, “Go over and join this chariot.” 8:30 So Philip ran up 17 to it 18 and heard the man 19 reading Isaiah the prophet. He 20 asked him, 21 “Do you understand what you’re reading?” 8:31 The man 22 replied, “How in the world can I, 23 unless someone guides me?” So he invited Philip to come up and sit with him. 8:32 Now the passage of scripture the man 24 was reading was this:

“He was led like a sheep to slaughter,

and like a lamb before its shearer is silent,

so he did 25 not open his mouth.

8:33 In humiliation 26 justice was taken from him. 27

Who can describe his posterity? 28

For his life was taken away 29 from the earth.” 30

8:34 Then the eunuch said 31 to Philip, “Please tell me, 32 who is the prophet saying this about – himself or someone else?” 33 8:35 So Philip started speaking, 34 and beginning with this scripture 35 proclaimed the good news about Jesus to him. 8:36 Now as they were going along the road, they came to some water, and the eunuch said, “Look, there is water! What is to stop me 36 from being baptized?” 37 8:37 [[OMITTED]] 8:38 So he ordered the chariot to stop, and both Philip and the eunuch went down into the water, 38 and Philip baptized 39 him. 8:39 Now when they came up out of the water, the Spirit of the Lord snatched Philip away, and the eunuch did not see him any more, but 40 went on his way rejoicing. 41 8:40 Philip, however, found himself 42 at Azotus, 43 and as he passed through the area, 44 he proclaimed the good news 45 to all the towns 46 until he came to Caesarea. 47

I know it's a stretch of the imagination to compare eunuchs to transsexuallity but that's the closest the Bible comes to it.

MaryEllen

[Guest Madison_Always]

i dont think my parents would ever and i mean ever tell me that i would burn in hell or anything but im just worried they would try to like fix me or something but all in good time

[gennee]

Hi Chelsea. One of my concerns when I came out to my spouse was reconciling my faith and the fact that I am transgender. Well, He loves me because he knew that I was transgender all along. Now she is accepting and my son is cool with it. He has put love in my heart for transgender people that knows no bounds.

I pray that your family will accept you for who you are. They will have many questions but we here are here to help them.

Gennee