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Drowning


Flint

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Splish, splosh, splash

Ominous, the rhythm of my heart

Beating heavily like the sound of a thousand drums

Thrashing profoundly

Splish, splosh, splash

Sunken, my eyes as I try to wake

Inundated, suffocating

Hands reach out to no avail

Splish, splosh, splash

The bubbles of a drowning man

Loom over the world

As my muffled screams flow through the ocean

Splish, splosh, splash

No life boats, no lighthouse

No harbour near by

No reason to try.

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Guest BrandonIThink

This is very vivid and emotional. I love the repetition of one line in poems; it's an extremely effective tool. The end was absolutely haunting. I've seen a few of your poems in this forum, and I just wanted to say I really enjoy your work; you've got a lot of talent.

Brandon

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  • 1 month later...

This is very vivid and emotional. I love the repetition of one line in poems; it's an extremely effective tool. The end was absolutely haunting. I've seen a few of your poems in this forum, and I just wanted to say I really enjoy your work; you've got a lot of talent.

Brandon

Thanks

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  • Admin

That is an extraordinarily evocative poem, Matt. Says an awful lot in just a few words. Sometimes that type of writing is the most poignant and most effective.

I have to admit though, the juxtaposition of the intense poem while watching your avatar out of the corner of my eye was somewhat disconcerting. I hope I don't see that

face in my dreams tonight. :unsure:

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

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That is an extraordinarily evocative poem, Matt. Says an awful lot in just a few words. Sometimes that type of writing is the most poignant and most effective.

I have to admit though, the juxtaposition of the intense poem while watching your avatar out of the corner of my eye was somewhat disconcerting. I hope I don't see that

face in my dreams tonight. :unsure:

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

Lol I'm guessing you're referring to the avatar with the blinking eyes. It suddenly stopped blinking on here so I changed it to a photo of myself as you can see....

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