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Guest Phens

Hello/new Here

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Hello All,

I am new here! Thanks for allowing me to participate! I have been with my CD man for 8 years. He was honest and up front about who he is and I adore him so it was not really an issue. He is the best husband in the world and truly all my friends are envious of how wonderful he is to me. Lately I have been struggling with his CD. No one but he and I know about this and he wants to keep it that way. I wish I knew why all of a sudden I can embrace it sometimes and other times I just don't want anything to do with it. I dont want to hurt him in any way....anyone else having this issue!

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Hello All,

I am new here! Thanks for allowing me to participate! I have been with my CD man for 8 years. He was honest and up front about who he is and I adore him so it was not really an issue. He is the best husband in the world and truly all my friends are envious of how wonderful he is to me. Lately I have been struggling with his CD. No one but he and I know about this and he wants to keep it that way. I wish I knew why all of a sudden I can embrace it sometimes and other times I just don't want anything to do with it. I dont want to hurt him in any way....anyone else having this issue!

Hey Phens,

Just wanted to welcome you to Laura's and let you know that your post has not been missed. Sometimes the correct reply takes a little longer.(I don't claim this is it.;))

I'll just say that I don't think you're being unreasonable at all. I would also say that others here on Laura's that are way better at giving advice than me would tell you that your feelings are completely normal and too ease up on yourself a little.

As a married TS, I appreciate the effort that you've put into your relationship. Others would call you brave and so on for standing by your CD man, I would be one of them, you are. A lot of women don't stick around. I also know that sometimes you might not feel that way at all and wish that things could be normal.

Hang in there and keep the communication going with your SO.

Caroline

btw My wife has stuck around for over 19 years while I have been going through this. How she has keep her sanity is beyond me. She isn't going to be around for the whole thing, she said that she can't, but I love her just the same and cherish every day that I am allowed to be a part of her life.

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Hi Phens,

Welcome to Laura's! You've found a great place to be yourself and explore your feelings.

Your spouse is very lucky to have someone as caring and supportive as you are! I can't speak to your feelings or those of others in your situation because I am coming from a different experience except to say how much I admire you for your understanding and caring.

We will be happy to share our opinions and experiences with you. Please feel free to post as much as you want in any forum whether asking questions, expressing opinions or sharing experiences. We are a PG-13 moderated site. You will have access to the PM system and profiles after 5 posts.

If you have not already done so, please read the "Terms and Conditions" page, the link to it can be found near the upper right of most any Forum page

I enjoyed your introduction and look forward to your posts!

Johnny

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Hi Phens,

I am in a complicated non-relationship with my s/o. While we are not together anymore for reasons that has nothing to do with her gender issues, I am still very much a part of her life.

While we were together I felt the same kind of acceptance and intolerance to her dressing and gender issues. While I love her very much and wanted her to be happy, the constant secrets and cycles of self hatred she would go through would make me wish that I wasn't a part of it anymore.

Sometimes I seem to morn the man, wanting nothing more then a normal life with the man I fell in love with.

Hope this helps you to see that your emotions are not irrational that its the same problem that most of us s/o's go through.

Oh and welcome to the playground!!

Hisgirl

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Hi Phens,

Welcome i am glad you're here.

It is wonderful to hear that you are so supportive of your husband =] .

It is understandable that you can feel so accepting towards his CD one minute and then not want anything to do with it the next. This isn't what you signed up for when you married him and though you love him and accept him still, it is only natural that sometimes it makes you angry because in loving him it is almost like you are forced to accept something in which you had no choice or forewarning of. We all still surprise our partners once in a while with new, sometimes negative, things that are a part of who we are but took awhile in coming out. The important thing is that you are accepting of it and we are all here to give you the support you need for those times when you feel like you aren't.

=] Sam

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