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Military and Transition


In or Out?  

30 members have voted

  1. 1. Would you go back in or stay in the military?

    • Stay out, or leave the military
    • Stay in, or reenlist
    • Undecided
    • Never was in, however would like to join
    • Never was in, and would not join


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I have a question, if you where given the chance to go back into the military after or while your transitioning with no repercussion (minus few job like special forces) would you?

I would also like to hear opinions and other comments

Krysti~

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  • 2 weeks later...

I'm currently in the military. And I want out.

But it's curious, I often imagine what it's like to get out, and I know that I'd just want back in again. Most of the people I know in my unit want out of the Army. So this is the constant, that is standard to want out of the military. I like to call it "the heat." When you're in the heat, all you want is to get out, right? What happens when you're out of the heat? It's like retiring. You just get bored, you want action, you want back in.

That being said, if I could transition in the military(and the people in my unit weren't so bigoted), I definitely would stay in. It's great. Travel the world, deploy, experience the most extreme situations. Unfortunately I cannot wait for them to allow Transgender members to serve, it'll be at least a couple years. I have to start on something now. In the event that they recalled me to serve after transition or acceptance of TG servicemembers, I'd proudly serve again.

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Guest Donna Jean

.

Go back in?

Heck no! I barely got out with my butt intact the first time.....

I'd not push it again....but, I did get to see the world!

Donna Jean

Huggs

Dee Jay

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Guest GinaInside

Hi,

One of the worst mistakes I made was taking an early discharge. It was Honorable, but will never feel that way to me.

I did have fleeting moments when I though I would beat my GD, but it was a barrier to me being a good Soldier. All the guys I served with could see right through me, but they only though I was gay. An incident occurred to me one night, and it nearly pushed me over the edge. In hindsight, I really should have just protected myself better.

I was only 10 months from ETS, and I took the discharge instead. They even gave me my GI Bill. But now, I have a level of shame and regret that I could not complete a lousy 3 year enlistment.

To anyone who wants out early, unless the situation is really bad, I would seriously consider your future.

Hugz,

Gina Renee

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I think it would be really interesting to go back in (after SRS, particularly). I loved being in the Army, and enjoyed my job as well as the people I got to meet. Unfortunately, I was medically discharged, and my condition will most likely not ever be going away, so that pretty much rules it out.

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Guest MissErika

I am 15 days away from getting out early. I am gettin a fully honorable discharge.

I am even taking the rest of my leave. If the military suddenly started to allow transgender

I would d everyting in my power to stop the discharge and stay in and transition.

However we all know that will not happen any time soon.

on a side note I am not in a combat job/mos. If I were in a combat oriented

Mos, I might feel dfferent about it.

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Hi,

One of the worst mistakes I made was taking an early discharge. It was Honorable, but will never feel that way to me.

I did have fleeting moments when I though I would beat my GD, but it was a barrier to me being a good Soldier. All the guys I served with could see right through me, but they only though I was gay. An incident occurred to me one night, and it nearly pushed me over the edge. In hindsight, I really should have just protected myself better.

I was only 10 months from ETS, and I took the discharge instead. They even gave me my GI Bill. But now, I have a level of shame and regret that I could not complete a lousy 3 year enlistment.

To anyone who wants out early, unless the situation is really bad, I would seriously consider your future.

Hugz,

Gina Renee

You know I totally agree with you. I really don't want an early discharge, but I it's my only option. I know I won't ever be happy with the "lousy" two years I put in. But I still value self over service(sounds horrible though).

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Guest GinaInside

Hi,

One of the worst mistakes I made was taking an early discharge. It was Honorable, but will never feel that way to me.

I did have fleeting moments when I though I would beat my GD, but it was a barrier to me being a good Soldier. All the guys I served with could see right through me, but they only though I was gay. An incident occurred to me one night, and it nearly pushed me over the edge. In hindsight, I really should have just protected myself better.

I was only 10 months from ETS, and I took the discharge instead. They even gave me my GI Bill. But now, I have a level of shame and regret that I could not complete a lousy 3 year enlistment.

To anyone who wants out early, unless the situation is really bad, I would seriously consider your future.

Hugz,

Gina Renee

You know I totally agree with you. I really don't want an early discharge, but I it's my only option. I know I won't ever be happy with the "lousy" two years I put in. But I still value self over service(sounds horrible though).

Hey Mercal,

I think for me it is more that it is just one more thing my GD sort of ruined for me. I knew the Army could not "make a man out of me", but was unable to contain it long enough to complete a minimum enlistment. Now, no matter how hard I try to just let it go, and "fugeddaboudit", it sort of haunts me. At the time, I felt I had to get out of the environment, and was temporarily relieved when I left. The shame came later.

I hope all works out for you, and my heart goes out to you.

Hugz,

Gina

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Hi,

One of the worst mistakes I made was taking an early discharge. It was Honorable, but will never feel that way to me.

I did have fleeting moments when I though I would beat my GD, but it was a barrier to me being a good Soldier. All the guys I served with could see right through me, but they only though I was gay. An incident occurred to me one night, and it nearly pushed me over the edge. In hindsight, I really should have just protected myself better.

I was only 10 months from ETS, and I took the discharge instead. They even gave me my GI Bill. But now, I have a level of shame and regret that I could not complete a lousy 3 year enlistment.

To anyone who wants out early, unless the situation is really bad, I would seriously consider your future.

Hugz,

Gina Renee

You know I totally agree with you. I really don't want an early discharge, but I it's my only option. I know I won't ever be happy with the "lousy" two years I put in. But I still value self over service(sounds horrible though).

Hey Mercal,

I think for me it is more that it is just one more thing my GD sort of ruined for me. I knew the Army could not "make a man out of me", but was unable to contain it long enough to complete a minimum enlistment. Now, no matter how hard I try to just let it go, and "fugeddaboudit", it sort of haunts me. At the time, I felt I had to get out of the environment, and was temporarily relieved when I left. The shame came later.

I hope all works out for you, and my heart goes out to you.

Hugz,

Gina

Well thanks for the good wishes.

I know somewhere down the line I'm gonna have to explain that I was in the Army, but never really did anything or even deployed. Maybe countering it won't work, but perhaps if I do other extreme fun things it'll sort of balance itself out. That way I can focus on other things I've done.

~Emily

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Guest PhoebeJoan

I have been in the Australian defence force for 4.5 years, and plan to get out wonce my 6 year enlistment period finishes in mid-2013. It's perfect timing for me actually. Gives me time to continue with savings, uni studies, and my RLT.

Australia has only just recently allowed transgender personnel to transition while in service. The old policy was removed in Sep 2010, pretty much the instant I started to seek help. A new policy was put in place last August which I am very happy with. I am one of the first couple ADF members to transition, and possibly the first in my service, so its uncharted waters, but my specialisation isn't full of bigots.

I plan to come out full-time at work by mid-2012, and then hopefully get my SRS done before i leave defence in 2013. I have saved up some money, and will have 2 more years of my Bachelors degree at uni to go once I leave defence.

I feel very lucky and was in the right place at the right time. I know of your hardships that continue over there in the US, and really hope that can get sorted out asap, my heart goes out to you. When news broke of the DADT repeal over here, I made sure to remind my co-workers that this has had no effect on transgender members.

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  • 2 weeks later...
Guest Just_Lucas

you know i thought of joining the military but i dont really believe what the war is all about anymore i mean i like the navy but idk if i was in the navy i'd stay its fun like being a military photographer :D, but if i was to join the Military...the navy would be my choice :)

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Guest Just_Lucas

I have been in the Australian defence force for 4.5 years, and plan to get out wonce my 6 year enlistment period finishes in mid-2013. It's perfect timing for me actually. Gives me time to continue with savings, uni studies, and my RLT.

Australia has only just recently allowed transgender personnel to transition while in service. The old policy was removed in Sep 2010, pretty much the instant I started to seek help. A new policy was put in place last August which I am very happy with. I am one of the first couple ADF members to transition, and possibly the first in my service, so its uncharted waters, but my specialisation isn't full of bigots.

I plan to come out full-time at work by mid-2012, and then hopefully get my SRS done before i leave defence in 2013. I have saved up some money, and will have 2 more years of my Bachelors degree at uni to go once I leave defence.

I feel very lucky and was in the right place at the right time. I know of your hardships that continue over there in the US, and really hope that can get sorted out asap, my heart goes out to you. When news broke of the DADT repeal over here, I made sure to remind my co-workers that this has had no effect on transgender members.

that's kool i believe some countries allow that im not sure about European countries but i do know some countries Let Tg in there armed services.

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  • 2 weeks later...
Guest Caroline Anne

I'm still in and desperately want out. If it wasn't for the fact that I'm less than two and a half years from retirement, I'd seek a discharge. I hope I can make it that long.

BTW, I've been on HRT for two years now. One complete physical with ECG during that time with not an eye blinked. There have been many midnight-3am showers when I'm forced to sleep in the open bay barracks, though.

Oh, I'm just able to pass my APFT test as a guy now. Being a Warrant Officer, I'm not sure there is much they can do to scare me if I fail one at this point. ;)

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Guest Gina9223

Geeze, I was in for 20 years and I have soooo many bad sea stories. Between all of the excitement and the sad fact that I actually had PTSD walking in to the Navy. Woof… No. Some of it was fun and exciting. I have some good sea stories but in all honesty NO! I have enough nightmares of ‘work’… Actually considering I still seem to spend 8 hours a day stuck in a dreamscape hanger wrenching on aircraft I should be billing out my time! :P

@GinaInside, please do not beat yourself up over ‘coulda been’s. You tired when so many others never got off the couch. I really do wish I could have been there for you when you needed someone to help you out. I know the kind of hell your alluding too. I was in for 20 years and I’m Intersexed along with the whole Trans thing. But after you take enough abuse you tend to grow a nice thick hide of armor. But that can be dehumanizing and I don’t suggest it for anyone. Do NOT feel shame or regret! You did something that few even try and you did it pulling an anchor. And 3 years? That should invest you in everything so you should benefit from that time.

@PhoebeJoan, yeah I know the first one down under. Nice person, loves Tim Tams and espresso’s.

@Just_Lucas, the following Commonwealth countries allow Transgender citizens to serve;

UK (Scotland, Wales, England), Ireland, Canada, Australia and New Zealand , I have friends in all of those militaries who are either transitioned or transitioning.

Remember, this is the US of A. If you do not like a policy (like the one barring Transgender US citizens from serving in the active duty US Military or providing adequate care) then you as a citizen are allowed to contact your congress members and voice that. Even lobby them extensively to change that 1950’s era policy.

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Guest GinaInside

@GinaInside, please do not beat yourself up over ‘coulda been’s. You tired when so many others never got off the couch. I really do wish I could have been there for you when you needed someone to help you out. I know the kind of hell your alluding too. I was in for 20 years and I’m Intersexed along with the whole Trans thing. But after you take enough abuse you tend to grow a nice thick hide of armor. But that can be dehumanizing and I don’t suggest it for anyone. Do NOT feel shame or regret! You did something that few even try and you did it pulling an anchor. And 3 years? That should invest you in everything so you should benefit from that time.

Hi Gina,

Thank you for your kind words. Maybe someday I'll be able to let it go.

Hugz,

Gina Renee

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Guest CarolynM

When I was in the Army back in75-87 there was too many misconceptions about sexuality or orientation. Today we have a wiser handle on the problems. Most of this has been brought about by law. There is still bigotry in some areas, but a start has been made. As for going back in, I would say that yes I would have but age has caught up with me. Maybe, as an advisor or councillor or such. I do feel that I have more to offer.

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  • 4 weeks later...
  • 4 weeks later...

I got out of the service because I wanted to start a family and didn't feel I could do that the way I wanted in.

If I had a do over, though, I'd have stayed in. I've missed the steady paycheck and medical care, and had to make a lot of compromises of how I'd like tomanage my family life anyway, andI'd only be three years from retirement now.

But there's no way I'd go back in now.

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It almost makes me cry seeing the same opinions as I'm having. I keep flip flopping sides. I know I'm only a couple months from deployment and I REALLY want to deploy. It's interesting that probably some of the most astute citizens in the nation can't serve our armed forces because of trans* related issues. I only know that I can feel regret later, but unfortunately it's that "do or die" moment, and I almost don't have a choice anymore. I almost feel like to quit now, would be a total shame. I would almost have to move out of the country to rectify myself.

It's just... saddening. I won't deploy. Unless I moved to Australia and joined their Army. But very unlikely. =(

~Emily

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Guest GinaInside

It almost makes me cry seeing the same opinions as I'm having. I keep flip flopping sides. I know I'm only a couple months from deployment and I REALLY want to deploy. It's interesting that probably some of the most astute citizens in the nation can't serve our armed forces because of trans* related issues. I only know that I can feel regret later, but unfortunately it's that "do or die" moment, and I almost don't have a choice anymore. I almost feel like to quit now, would be a total shame. I would almost have to move out of the country to rectify myself.

It's just... saddening. I won't deploy. Unless I moved to Australia and joined their Army. But very unlikely. =(

~Emily

Hi Emily,

I understand the flip-flop issue, it never goes away...

If you must deploy, please be careful and as safe as you can. I have a deep sense of forboding about what is coming next.

I wish you all the best.

Hugz,

Gina Renee

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Guest Shelby32

I'm currently in the marine corps, I still have about 2.5 years.. I don't want to leave my corps but its extremely difficult living day to day as a different person.. Especially since I live in the barracks. Its also difficult because I'm expected to go to the gym and I don't want to get all huge and muscly. Plus I love men.. So its a bad situation but my therapist is keeping me sane.

Oorah!

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  • 1 month later...
Guest kayla.jade

I'm in the Army with about 8 months left. I've had several laser hair removal treatments, and am able to dress in private on occassion. I think I should start seeing a therapist again so I can hit the ground running with the HRT once I'm out. :) I'm taking my GI bill and running, I hate being in the Army. haha

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Guest KarenLyn

I have my twenty in so I wouldn't go back. Even if I didn't, I wouldn't bother because of the way they manage things. I was a top avionics tech and worked on a variety of communications and navigation equipment. Rather than keep me where I excelled, they moved me to a shop as a supervisor responsible for direct aircraft maintenance. When I got to the shop, I didn't even know how to open the cockpit. It's pretty demoralizing.

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  • 3 weeks later...
  • 3 weeks later...
Guest Caroline Anne

Well, I came out to my company commander last night. He had just told me that my request for a medical review board for PTSD would not be handled promptly and wanted to know if I still wanted to pursue it. He said my options he was given to tell me were to resign or wait for my 20 year retirement in two and a half years.

So, I told him I was trans and that I thought that a medical chapter for being trans would help me with the PTSD % I have with the V.A.

The point is, is that I can not wait two and a half years for retirement. I knew when I started transition two years ago that it would be tough to last 4 years. I made it just over two years before I realized that the 4 years was way too ambitious.

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