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Children of the Butterfly


Guest Kiley Michelle

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Guest Kiley Michelle

Hello girl. Who are you? Do you know?

Can't you tell me why you are the way you are?

Why do you do this, don't you think it is strange?

Friend, I am who I am and I know this is so. I have had

everyday of my life so far to learn and to grow. Many

things about me have changed since I was young; but one feeling

remains solid, consistent and strong.

This is wrong.

It is not me.

I am not who I should be.

This truth has rattled my bearings, stripped me to my core

and lain me naked upon its pure white altar and I have seen,

upon this altar of truth, this altar of my true self; I have lain

alongside my brothers and sisters and we have all found our

flesh to be false.

Alone, we have spent many empty nights with only our tear-soaked

pillows to comfort us. We have shown our grief and our pain through

the cuts on our wrists, the burns on our skin, the denial of food,

and the sweet release of drugs that take our realities away from us.

In unison, a chorus of grief stricken voices cry: We will not accept this!

We will not let the fears of others imprison us! No more will we live

without living in these empty shells; these masks; these prisons of

flesh, blood and bone! We will fight for our right to live as we must!

We refuse! We will fight!

The choice is made, the deciscion is over and our path is set. We climb,

we wait, we worm our way through the system; we pay.

We pay in time, we pay in Willpower; we pay with our family, our friends;

we pay with our lives.

Countless hours; countless amounts of money; daily payments of fear,

anxiety and hope.

We pay.

And for what? To appease the very society we live in is all but impossible

for we are taboo. We are untouchables, perverts, abominations in their views;

their unseeing views for they are blind. We seek no greater end than they,

nothing different or strange; our quest, our goal, is the same as any other

human being. Our pursuit is the pursuit of happiness. Our desires are simple,

to love ourselves. To no longer look at our reflections with sorrow, anger and

loathing. To walk in public with our heads held high, knowing that the world

can see us for who we are.

Society has dictated that our struggles are not enough, and so they place

more upon us. Many of our mothers, brothers, fathers, sisters, sons and

daughters are lost for being who they are. We are raped, beaten, and murdered

for being ourselves. We carry everyday, fear and anxiety.

This is who we are friend, for I am only one small memeber of a much larger

family and we are strong. We have many who have traveled the distance and many

who still live confused, but we are strong.

We are born into this world like everyone else. Through our thoughts, feelings

and actions we isolate ourselves. Only then do we finally see who we really are.

We build our cocoons of clothes, family, hormones and friends. Inside the cocoon

are doubts and fears, hopes and longings; all racing about, building pressure

until finally it bursts.

We are reborn.

We emerge, the individuals that we knew we always were. The truth of our being

realized, we are free! Released from our prisons,

We are free!

We are children of love, children of hate, children of confusion, children of

patience, children of loss. We are the children of guilt, children of strength,

and children of hope.

We are the children of the butterfly.

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