Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Enlightenment and gender identity disorder


Guest Addi

Recommended Posts

Hi everybody,

I've been participating in guided meditations and reading some books about finding peace within yourself by recognizing how our minds create imaginations that cause us to suffer, and separating the actions of the mind from our true inner being which does not suffer. One book noted that the mind will focus on the past, which cannot be changed, or the future which is unknown (therefore both create needless suffering). Make sense? I'm new to this so probably aren't explaining it very well. Anyway, I've been wondering if the mind does not reflect reality but instead creates suffering...and if our sense of self, our ego, is just a fiction created by our mind, then what does that tell us about GID? If I can end my suffering by getting below my mind's influence and live in the moment does this suggest that transitioning is no longer relevant to finding my happiness?

What do you think?

Hugs,

Shari

Link to comment

Hi Shari,

You have asked the question that has become my life-koan. I have practiced Zen off and on for 40 years, and it did keep me from transitioning for a long time. But, I haven't returned to full practice since transition. I do hope to ask my Zen teacher that very same question!

There was an article recently that discussed mindfulness and self-compassion. It addresses how we mindlessly make decisions, leading to suffering. And, often times, we mindlessly decide to drift off into the past or future without awarness of the present. I feel that transition has made me less mindful, and that I'm probably suffering for it. It's hard to detect, most of the time! But it was because I stopped meditation that I've become less mindful, not necessarily because of transition. I am going to practice the self-compassionate step of returning to Zen as soon as possible...

Back to your question: If all of this trans stuff is just in your mind, does it really matter - does it have substance? In as much as it matters what life-choices we make for everything, transition matters a lot - it just becomes a part of your Karma (Not the old Hindu style, but that you are a sum of all of your choices) . No it doesn't have substance - but that's a difficult critter to pin down! Zen talks about there only being one universal substance - and it encompasses everything at once - good, bad, young, and old, straight or trans.

You can find enlightenment and escape all suffering. But, I realized that it was a long ways off and that I could transition faster than that. Now I have a kind of peace that I didn't have before. And being less tortured, I'm not in a big hurry to get back on that meditation pillow!

All the best to you!

Love, Megan

Link to comment
Guest GinaInside

Hi Shari,

I've been on The Path for a long time, seeking the same answers.

It began for me after a motorcycle accident, which caused me to have an NDE, Near Death Experience. Since that time, I have sought to understand the Other Side, and how it affects us.

There is more than just the mind at work here, and the mind likely wanders the way it does, as a sort of Ego protection mecanism. There are ceratinly psychic barriers within different levels of the mind, also. I do not know if there is some kind of Spiritual dimension to all of this, but there sure is a physical one! I think if someone really has GD, it can't meditated away, but calmed and stalled, at best.

One thing you may want to consider learning also, is Qi (Chi), or Prana focus. It is easy to learn, and I've been using it to calm my body for years.

Hugz,

Gina Renee

Link to comment
Guest Jenny C

Wow... I've been in this, meditation and all for so long... I do believe that we have a Soul and we are more than our body and had proof in my life for so long... So many experiences that proved it...

And I've read your post and that of Meri who talk about Eckard and I know of Khrisnamurti... And I'm still thinking...

And I want to believe it all and I do. As I do believe in Christ, which message was, for me, identical... in some ways...

We all have our cross and carry it along the way...

And i'm still thinking about all that...

And I then surrender to my Soul, which connects me to what is more, God, and unites all, all together...

'cause my Ego doesn't have the answer.

But for sure...

Everyone, whatever their path can get there...

I'm praying for enlightenment and surrendering, whatever will be my path or that of others...

Love,

Jenny

P.S. it is my first thought. Further ones will surely come...

Link to comment

It works for me, when my mind starts chewing on that old disphoria bone, I remind myself who I really am and step back. In my thinking, my body is like a coat and it happens to be blue when I would prefer pink. Sometimes I get very wound up in wanting that pink coat and even manage to agree with my mind that I am that pink coat. Then I catch myself, realize I am not the coat, but the inhabitant of it. I also realize that a pink coat is available to me if I choose next time around.

So, I amuse myself by playing around with clothing and pretending, all the while holding very firmly in my find that I am playing and my creation is a temporary creation, nothing more. It's not me. I am good with that.

Too many of us here start playing around with clothing as crossdressers then strangely, being to question our identity. I think we are very adaptable creatures and could manage to convince ourselves of just about anything we wanted to. In that sense, playing around with clothing of the opposite gender is like playing with fire. You may get burned!

I believe gender is a fabrication, a creation of this world. Everything I have read indicates that as spirit, we are all of the above. That's why I think we are so adaptable when it comes to gender, nudge is in one direction or another, give us a little bit of sexual excitement to go with it and voila, a new case of GID is born.

I believe we all have the capacity to be whatever we want including whatever gender we would want. I would love to have a couple of extra bodies to use at will, both male and female. It would be a lot of fun.

Our culture is too rigid regarding gender and that has created a lot of problems. If they would lighten up, I think there would be a lot less suffering with respect to gender for all parties concerned. Perhaps in another 1000 years!

Link to comment
Guest GinaInside

It works for me, when my mind starts chewing on that old disphoria bone, I remind myself who I really am and step back. In my thinking, my body is like a coat and it happens to be blue when I would prefer pink. Sometimes I get very wound up in wanting that pink coat and even manage to agree with my mind that I am that pink coat. Then I catch myself, realize I am not the coat, but the inhabitant of it. I also realize that a pink coat is available to me if I choose next time around.

So, I amuse myself by playing around with clothing and pretending, all the while holding very firmly in my find that I am playing and my creation is a temporary creation, nothing more. It's not me. I am good with that.

Too many of us here start playing around with clothing as crossdressers then strangely, being to question our identity. I think we are very adaptable creatures and could manage to convince ourselves of just about anything we wanted to. In that sense, playing around with clothing of the opposite gender is like playing with fire. You may get burned!

I believe gender is a fabrication, a creation of this world. Everything I have read indicates that as spirit, we are all of the above. That's why I think we are so adaptable when it comes to gender, nudge is in one direction or another, give us a little bit of sexual excitement to go with it and voila, a new case of GID is born.

I believe we all have the capacity to be whatever we want including whatever gender we would want. I would love to have a couple of extra bodies to use at will, both male and female. It would be a lot of fun.

Our culture is too rigid regarding gender and that has created a lot of problems. If they would lighten up, I think there would be a lot less suffering with respect to gender for all parties concerned. Perhaps in another 1000 years!

Hi Meri,

I understand what you are saying about the body not being the total Being, but I can't really agree with some of what you said. Most of us did not start Crossdressing, and then question our identity. There is more to this issue than convincing ourselves that we are someone other than who we see in the mirror. Further, Gender is not just a human construct, it observable in other animals in Nature, not that I agree with it's rigid enforcement in society.

For me, it really began about age 5, then I knew I had a problem by age 7. My body dysphoria began at that time. GD is a very physically palpable minute to minute issue for me. I never once tried to convince myself that it was there, and spent a lifetime trying to convice myself I could make it go away. To go back to my earlier post, I do not believe one can meditate this problem away; it would take a major brain-washing to do that.

Yes, we are Spiritual Beings, having a human experience. Aspects of my GD-life make me think there may be some kind of Spiritual connection to being Trans, but I am not sure. Re-incarnation is the rule, not the exception, and it could have something to do with

this issue.

Hugz,

Gina Renee

Link to comment

Thank you all for your insight. My gender problems began before I had any sexual desire or capacity, before I put on that first night gown. So, I don't believe that cross dressing was a cause, I believe it was an effect. Anyway, I've been contemplating this in the context of spirituality without examining my past life too closely. Isn't it possible that something deeper than the mind is behind all this? My thought process leads me to this idea because the ego, our sense of self, is a construct of the many things we learn as we go through life. Our mind creates this image. Both positive and negative. At no time did anyone or anything teach me that I was a girl. I just am. In fact, I was raised to be very male but never fully accepted that role. I acted in a way to suit those around me. So I'm thinking the bottom line here is that our gender is really more hard-wired than we realize. That it is not that our minds are trans, our very being is female or male. That would mean that I could never find enlightenment as long as the relationship between my soul and my body is mis-aligned. I interpret and process information based on the feminine side of the binary. Isn't enlightenment the end of conflict, both internally as well as how we relate to the world around us? If true, I can only find peace and enlightenment AFTER transition, not before.

What do think? Am I over thinking it?

Hugs,

Shari

Link to comment
Guest GinaInside

Thank you all for your insight. My gender problems began before I had any sexual desire or capacity, before I put on that first night gown. So, I don't believe that cross dressing was a cause, I believe it was an effect. Anyway, I've been contemplating this in the context of spirituality without examining my past life too closely. Isn't it possible that something deeper than the mind is behind all this? My thought process leads me to this idea because the ego, our sense of self, is a construct of the many things we learn as we go through life. Our mind creates this image. Both positive and negative. At no time did anyone or anything teach me that I was a girl. I just am. In fact, I was raised to be very male but never fully accepted that role. I acted in a way to suit those around me. So I'm thinking the bottom line here is that our gender is really more hard-wired than we realize. That it is not that our minds are trans, our very being is female or male. That would mean that I could never find enlightenment as long as the relationship between my soul and my body is mis-aligned. I interpret and process information based on the feminine side of the binary. Isn't enlightenment the end of conflict, both internally as well as how we relate to the world around us? If true, I can only find peace and enlightenment AFTER transition, not before.

What do think? Am I over thinking it?

Hugs,

Shari

Hi Shari,

I don't think you are over-thinking it at all! There truly is more than just the mind, or Ego at work here. There are scientific studies of physical evidence such as hormone imbalances, brain-formation, and DNA which show that we are not just imagining all this. This is a truly mysterious phenomenon on many levels.

Believe me, I have tried so hard to change myself through meditation, prayer, and lots of other things. If you have GD, it does'nt turn off, no matter what you do. It is definately deeper than something in the Ego, and I lean towards some kind of Spiritual dimension. As far out there as it sounds, I lean towards some kind of reincarnation (a misnomer, really) issue, as I have felt deep down since I was about 6, that my middle name should have been Renee. I have sought the Spiritual connection to this issue for so long, but who knows? It could even be something as mundane as a malfunction in Nature.

I will never stop seeking the answer(s). I understand your feeling about not being able to find Enlightenment, while you are struggling with this issue. It is there for me too, and many others I imagine. It is possible to calm oneself, gain insights, and learn to cope better through meditation. Another source of insights are your dreams; it does take some discipline to keep a dream journal, but very worthwhile.

Hugz,

Gina Renee

Link to comment
Guest Jenny C

Oh my god !!! Sorry...

Who knows ? Yes, who knows ?

if were trying to understand with our mental... Then, it is our ego speaking...

I think (my ego ;-), that it is not ours to judge.

I been praying and meditating all my life... This is THE reason I did not cross in the first place and that, I knew, quite young... (around 10) My Faith. As said previously, I said to myself : If I was this way, I should not change it 'cause there must be a purpose.

And after so many years of trying to integrate my feminine and masculine part, I'm still there... There must be a reason... (that I tell to myself).

I'll find it... I'm sure... It will come... An answer... When it's time.

(...)

Maybe it is to take the STEP ?

(...)

Maybe it is not... ?

(...)

The answer will come when it's time... And I'm not the one to judge... I'll just know... As others... Whatever.

(...)

And for the light... I spend sometime in my life helping others (as much as I can, in fact). When I do and surrender totally to what is beyond, and my mental or ego is silenced, light goes through me.

I can feel it and see it... And I'm sure others here know what I'm taking about... When we are One... With what I think is the Divine... (to which we are all linked) Then, there is no pressure... Just a sense of doing what is right, a sense of purpose... of being an instrument...

Is it what it is to be enlighten ?

If it is.. I am enlighten when I do what must be done... And I feel it.. and see it...

(...)

Can I be enlighten all the time... ? I'm not there yet...

(...)

A story...

About 20 or more years ago. I met a man. He told me : "the day you'll realize that you not a man or a woman (I was shocked... How would he know...?) you'll be free and nothing will be impossible for you..." He said:" 'cause we are a ball of light..." And then he explained me what happen after death... (in my head, I was saying to myself... he is crazy... but at the same time, I was moved...)

Two weeks later... Everything goes blank at a certain moment (I'll spare you the details...)

I saw a big ball of light while there was black everywhere (no sound, nothing... no sense of reality)... It was turning all around and then stopped... I saw his face in the light... I smiled and I said... Hello (his name)...

Then he smiled and went right through me... and then everything was back to normal...

A few minute later, after telling about it to the persons I was with... I learned he died a few hours ago...

He gave me a proof of what he said... before leaving...

Why ? Did he had any gift ? I think so... He knew what I was living... Without knowing me... Why ?...

Yes he gave me a proof that we are more...

(...)

This experience and many others are still with me... And I can not doubt. And I live my life in accordance... (To what is just, what is right)

(...)

So I believe there is something beyond....

But I believe also... There forces guiding us if we are open to them...

So...

No one is to judge of our path or the path of others...

And whoever we are, and whatever the choices we have made, nothing can stop us to be a light bearers...

Might you be enlighten to do what is right... ! You'll know it. That is what I wish to you all and what I pray for.

Love,

Jenny

Link to comment

Gina Renee, thank you and I hope you find your peace. I rarely remember my dreams, but when I do I will record them in my journal.

Jenny, I get what you're saying about our ego speaking in trying to find answers. The ego is not capable of this, right? I'm reading "Falling into Grace" by Adyashanti. Have you read it? Adyashanti says that when we struggle we move farther away from enlightenment because we contract into our ego. Acceptance and quieting of the ego allow us to see more clearly.

Might we all be enlightened to do what is right! To be light bearers.

Hugs,

Shari

Link to comment
Guest Jenny C

Wow Shari ! Thanks... I did not read it... But it is the idea, I think... "when we struggle we move farther away from enlightenment because we contract into our ego. "

​Exactly !

:friends:

Hugs !

Love,

Jenny

Link to comment

Hi Jenny,

It's an excellent read with many insights that seem to make a connection for me.

You're very spiritual and I am just beginning to explore mine. I have so much to learn.

Hugs,

Shari

Link to comment

Thank you all for your insight. My gender problems began before I had any sexual desire or capacity, before I put on that first night gown. So, I don't believe that cross dressing was a cause, I believe it was an effect. Anyway, I've been contemplating this in the context of spirituality without examining my past life too closely. Isn't it possible that something deeper than the mind is behind all this? My thought process leads me to this idea because the ego, our sense of self, is a construct of the many things we learn as we go through life. Our mind creates this image. Both positive and negative. At no time did anyone or anything teach me that I was a girl. I just am. In fact, I was raised to be very male but never fully accepted that role. I acted in a way to suit those around me. So I'm thinking the bottom line here is that our gender is really more hard-wired than we realize. That it is not that our minds are trans, our very being is female or male. That would mean that I could never find enlightenment as long as the relationship between my soul and my body is mis-aligned. I interpret and process information based on the feminine side of the binary. Isn't enlightenment the end of conflict, both internally as well as how we relate to the world around us? If true, I can only find peace and enlightenment AFTER transition, not before.

What do think? Am I over thinking it?

Hugs,

Shari

Shari,

We all over-think this. Your statement about enlightenment is really interesting because it's exactly the opposite of what I have been led to believe enlightenment is. I would think that an enlightened being couldn't care less one way or the other what gender their body is. Rather, if they gave thought to gender at all (which is unlikely), the internal feeling of gender would be sufficient.

I internally identify as feminine, my body is not. In the right frame of mind, it doesn't bother me, it's OK. I am only camping out here, it's not the real me, it doesn't matter.

My body such as it is has been a really good one, I have been very happy with the health, comfort and security it has provided me. I have considered SRS and hormones, but rejected them because I wouldn't want to do it to this body and risk breaking it!

I have also come to realize that no amount of surgery or hormones can truly change this body into a female body. Yes, I can "look" female, but this body can never "be" female. When I think along this lines, then the interest in changing my body disappears because it's not about my body, it's about my essence which is already feminine, I am already there!

GID is rooted in over-identification with our bodies, the notion that our body is all there is. I confess that if I believed that this body was all there was to me, then I would rethink my decision. I might do a lot of other things differently if this body was all there is to "me", such as quit my job, run off and go sailing!

Before you begin transition, please read Eckart Tolle "Power of Now" or "New Earth". Either of these books have the potential to give you a different perspective. They will only cost you around $10 each, so it's a very inexpensive way to gain a new outlook.

You may decide after reading, it isn't for you, if that's the case, then so be it! However, the other possibility remains, you may also find within yourself the ability to accept and love yourself just the way you are! That's worth $10 isn't it?

Link to comment
Guest Jenny C

I Love this thread... It is really at the center of spirituality and gender...

I'll come back for some thought later. But let's say that there is reincarnation... Then were are here to learn something in the process...

How can we judge it is the good experience to or not to transition... into a other gender ?

For those transitioning, maybe it is what they have to do ?

For those not, maybe it is also what they have to do...

Is what we are living guided by God or our Soul ?

Yesterday, there was at the mass a lecture on Saint Paul to the Corynthians (7, 29-31)... Check it...

What is right ? Are we investing in something that is not there ?

Who is to judge of our path ?

And if there is no reincarnation ?

Love,

Jenny

Link to comment

sometimes i find it very hard to listen to the message that is being given to me. somehow my ego gets in the way. any thoughts on how i can get to the point that i can shun away all of the external interference and just listen to the message within me telling me what to do?

Link to comment
Guest GinaInside

This is a deep topic.

I do agree with Meri, that when you see that we are energy, there is no male and/or female. But, that one point of enlightenment is so hard to attain. If you attain it through meditation, it will feel like "Unity" (the only name I could ascribe to it). And, I agree, no amount of surguries will make the body the opposite sex; as a former friend once said "It will still only be a tease.".

But, I have to disagree that GD stems from over-identification with the body. This is something deeper, that begins when one is young, before body identification is sorted out. If there are medically verifiable physical issues, like hormone imbalance, brain wiring, DNA variation, etc., then it goes beyond just "identifying" with the body. But, I do understand what you're saying.

As for re-incarnation, the word really is a misnomer. The concept of dying, and being reborn in a different body is much easier to understand, than the idea that all potential occurrances exist at the same point in time. This rabbit-hole is deep.

From my NDE, I can tell you this much:

1) We are Soul Beings, having a human experience

2) When you cross over, it will be nothing like you expect

3) Re-incarnation (for lack of a better word) is the rule, not the exception (Don't worry, you'll be back...)

After coming to terms with the NDE, I sought all available information on this and every related topic. Only learning to meditate, focus Qi/Prana, and the occasional OBE's, can validate for one, their Spiritual experience.

Hugz,

Gina Renee

Link to comment

Gina Renee,

I agree that the feelings of gender can come from deep within and start at a very early age. My feminine identity is very deep within, it was so well hidden that I didn't full realize it and accept it until my late 50's.

By over-identification with the body, here is what I am trying to say; most people are taught that they "are" their bodies. They are not taught that their body is simply a vehicle or an "encounter" suit designed to allow you to experience Earth physical life. Most people believe we also have a "spirit". As a result, people identify with their physical body and think the spirit is somehow housed inside.

The reality is that we are a spirit who, for a short period of time, has taken a body. The body is a construction of the spirit and encompasses your body (study auras and you will see that the spirit extends far beyond the edges of our body). Thus, we are not our body, our body is something we built, use and cast off a some point down the road.

Without proper training, most of us get lost in the body and forget who we are. We think our bodies are ourselves.

Problems arise when deep feelings of gender don't match our outward experience.

Problems arise when we get old and start thinking our dying husks are "ourselves".

All of this can be managed with a deeper understanding of our true nature. Your body is a trusted friend, something that has seen the authentic "spirit" you through thick and thin, it will stay with you to the end. Take care of it, feed it properly, make sure it gets enough sleep, treat it like you would any beloved pet or animal. Don't mistake it for yourself, you are so much more.

-Meri

Link to comment

sometimes i find it very hard to listen to the message that is being given to me. somehow my ego gets in the way. any thoughts on how i can get to the point that i can shun away all of the external interference and just listen to the message within me telling me what to do?

Teri,

Read any one of the Tolle books, the writing is designed to take you one step at a time toward a better understanding of your mind and how things work internally. He also gives you techniques which you can use to help you calm the beast.

Tolle considers our minds to be a tool, something that is of the body and something to use and call forth when needed. Somewhere along the line, the mind took over and dominates most of our waking thoughts. Tolle will help you use your mind instead of you mind using you...

Link to comment

Hi Everybody,

I've read Tolle, The Power of Now. His main point made sense but I got the feeling about half way through the book that he ran out of inspiration. That's just my impression.

Duality. Our spirits require it, good and bad, warm and cold, male and female. Our egos try to avoid duality by always defining or identifying with one side or the other. So, I wonder...

I get what your saying about over identification with the body. I really do, but I'm not sure what that means in terms of the paths we choose and our human existence. It is also very likely that the conflict of gender, whether egoic or spiritual, must be resolved. To ignore it, is unhealthy and a threat to our spirit.

Shari

Link to comment

Hi Everybody,

I've read Tolle, The Power of Now. His main point made sense but I got the feeling about half way through the book that he ran out of inspiration. That's just my impression.

Duality. Our spirits require it, good and bad, warm and cold, male and female. Our egos try to avoid duality by always defining or identifying with one side or the other. So, I wonder...

I get what your saying about over identification with the body. I really do, but I'm not sure what that means in terms of the paths we choose and our human existence. It is also very likely that the conflict of gender, whether egoic or spiritual, must be resolved. To ignore it, is unhealthy and a threat to our spirit.

Shari

Shari,

Here's what works for me, I have learned to recognize when my mind gets cranked up and begins chewing on some old, nonproductive thought or worry. For instance, if my mind starts chewing on the difference between outside (physical) and internal (spirit), then I have learned to take a step back, forgive myself for this thought pattern and then just "be" for a moment. Then, I can use my mind to think of something else. The more I practice this, the easier and more reliable it gets.

This issue was holding back my spiritual development and I believe it was placed before me to resolve before I could move forward. I also believe the tools were given to me to resolve it, Tolle among others and it was up to me to use these tools to resolve this issue.

It is resolved. My internal identity is feminine, my body is masculine and it doesn't really matter.

Once this issue is resolved in yourself, you can then examine what to do with your human existence. My leaning is to be of service to others, as such I am a healer and a teacher. These are the things I now focus on and when I connect, it brings me and the people I work with a lot of joy.

Keep looking for an answer and assume the universe will provide you with your own set of tools. People have wildly different reactions to Tolle, but there are other teachers, Buddha for one. Study what that poor guy did and gave up to reach enlightenment!

-Meri

Link to comment
Guest GinaInside

Gina Renee,

I agree that the feelings of gender can come from deep within and start at a very early age. My feminine identity is very deep within, it was so well hidden that I didn't full realize it and accept it until my late 50's.

By over-identification with the body, here is what I am trying to say; most people are taught that they "are" their bodies. They are not taught that their body is simply a vehicle or an "encounter" suit designed to allow you to experience Earth physical life. Most people believe we also have a "spirit". As a result, people identify with their physical body and think the spirit is somehow housed inside.

The reality is that we are a spirit who, for a short period of time, has taken a body. The body is a construction of the spirit and encompasses your body (study auras and you will see that the spirit extends far beyond the edges of our body). Thus, we are not our body, our body is something we built, use and cast off a some point down the road.

Without proper training, most of us get lost in the body and forget who we are. We think our bodies are ourselves.

Problems arise when deep feelings of gender don't match our outward experience.

Problems arise when we get old and start thinking our dying husks are "ourselves".

All of this can be managed with a deeper understanding of our true nature. Your body is a trusted friend, something that has seen the authentic "spirit" you through thick and thin, it will stay with you to the end. Take care of it, feed it properly, make sure it gets enough sleep, treat it like you would any beloved pet or animal. Don't mistake it for yourself, you are so much more.

-Meri

Hi Meri,

Yes, I understand what you are saying about the body. I think what I was trying to say before is that it is not so easy for Trans-people to distance themselves from physical reality and take the Soul perspective that it is only a temporal shell.

In the Western countries, most people's ideas of thier relationships with thier bodies are the result of religious, or atheistic conditioning. There is not much room for other Spiritual concepts within those frameworks. I have tried explaining my NDE to people who are rigidly entrenched in those dogmas...I may have just as well been speaking to a brick. Most people, will not in this lifetime, understand. I understand the temporality of the body, and longevity of the Spirit, very well.

I also understand the Aura, and the various layers of it : Etheric, Causal/Mental, and Spiritual, Bodies. Their layers reside in thier respective planes of existance, but make up what we call The Aura.

You can learn to see the Aura, to a degree, with your physical vision.

1) Wear clothing of neutral color, white/biege

2) Stand in front of a mirror (your batroom mirror will do)

3) Have a white background behind you (wall, or paper)

4) Relax yourself, breath deeply until calm

5) Relax your vision, while looking into your eyes

6) Start slowly scanning with your peripheral vision, around your body

7) You will first notice a silvery/watery layer around your body, the etheric body is the easiest to see

8) Continued practice will allow you to see the next layer, and some colors, this takes time

I have had the opportunity to see a real Aura reader. I tested her to see if she was legit, and she blew my mind!

In the realm of science, Kirlian Photography does see the Aura, though hard science denies this.

As for managing GD, yes it can be managed through meditation, but never completely turned off. And I still lean towards some Spiritual aspect to this, perhaps as Sheri mentioned, it may be what we are supposed to be dealing with in this lifetime.

Link to comment

All of this can be managed with a deeper understanding of our true nature. Your body is a trusted friend, something that has seen the authentic "spirit" you through thick and thin, it will stay with you to the end. Take care of it, feed it properly, make sure it gets enough sleep, treat it like you would any beloved pet or animal. Don't mistake it for yourself, you are so much more.

-Meri

Meri,

I really like this statement and I believe it. I'm still not completely clear on the original question about transitioning and enlightenment. Yes, I believe it possible to find peace through enlightenment. Our physical bodies allow our interaction with the world, so shouldn't that interaction reflect our gender identity? I don't believe that hiding our feelings of gender is sustainable, the secret will exact a price that will increase over time. So, I'm thinking out loud, is it possible to express our gender, in a method that those we interact with will accept, without seeking changes to the physical form? The behavior expectations of each gender is deeply rooted in our society.

I am sorry if I'm asking too many questions, they come from respect for your insight.

Hugs,

Shari

Link to comment

Gina Renee,

This is all way too big to have not been "planned" for us to deal with in this lifetime!

Please write more about your NDE, I have not had one of those, but I have astral projected on about 1/2 dozen occasions. Being out of your body certainly changes your perspective, doesn't it?

-Meri

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   5 Members, 0 Anonymous, 127 Guests (See full list)

    • April Marie
    • Ashley0616
    • Willow
    • Karen Carey
    • MaeBe
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.5k
    • Total Posts
      767.2k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      11,941
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Raelyn
    Newest Member
    Raelyn
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. **Angela Charlotte **
      **Angela Charlotte **
    2. Carlie
      Carlie
      (63 years old)
    3. Cbxshawn
      Cbxshawn
      (49 years old)
    4. HannahO
      HannahO
      (31 years old)
    5. JustKatie
      JustKatie
      (40 years old)
  • Posts

    • MaeBe
      The number is relative to method of deliver, the time of the dose, and when the blood is drawn. However, I do want to keep away from DVT and other potential issues. I assume I may be getting backed down from my current dose, but my doc told me to stick with the higher dose, so? I also wonder if this has anything to do the my breast growth and mental changes that have been happening over the past few years, like I have some estrogen sensitivity so a little goes a long way or something? I don't have enough data to postulate, but who knows!   With weekly, subcutaneous, shots you expect to see big swings of serum level estradiol from shot to peak to trough. My doctor is interested in mid-week testing (for E and T levels only), which would be post-peak blood serum levels but they will be higher than trough. Most, if not all, resources I've seen online is to measure at trough (which I might do just to do it next time) along with a SHBG, LH, and other metrics.   This is from transfemscience.org for Estradiol valerate in oil, which is very spiky compared to some other estradiol combinations. It's also for intramuscular, which will have a slower uptake and is usually dosed in higher volume due to the slower absorption rate from muscles. They don't have subcutaneous numbers, which I would expect to see similar spikes but higher levels at similar doses due to the relatively higher absorption rate direct from fat.   Are you doing pills, shots, or patches? And when you do get your levels checked are you getting that done when your levels are lowest or some other time?
    • Willow
      Both of my parents were from the “North Shore” of Boston.  My mother Lynn and my father Swampscot.  They had an early 1900s Scots-Irish New England diet.  My sister and I were born in the 40s in Ohio well away from New England seafood and in an area where food was more German and Polish.  My first experience with liver and onions was during basic training.  They ate salt cod but never forced us to eat it same with oysters.  My dad ate oysters but my mother wouldn’t.  Anyone who ever ate an oyster can figure that one out.  I grew up eating lamb.  My wife won’t touch it. I love brazed ox tail, again no way. And the list goes on.  
    • KathyLauren
      My mother was German, so yes, I think it was a cultural thing.  If I'd known you when we were cleaning out my mother's place, I could have sent you her "threat jar". 
    • Adrianna Danielle
      Been taking it real easy.Another good neighbor of mine and his 15 year old son came over and cut down a couple dead trees on my property.Knew not to do it taking it easy.I had them put the wood near my fire pit in the back yard.Did it and happy where they put it.They knew I had stents put in and needed to take it easy
    • Ashley0616
      Wow that is a high number for Estradiol good grief! Testosterone levels are better than mine. I don't remember my Estradiol level but testosterone was 80. To me that is really high but it was in the two hundreds the check in before last one. 
    • Ivy
      I don't understand why this would make a difference being a "dad" I mean, as far as how they would grow.
    • Ashley0616
      I don't see why not. I have worn forms since I came out. 
    • MaeBe
      I have never worn breastforms, but I assume as long as they don't aggravate your nipples you could.
    • MaeBe
      Every week I've been excited to take my shot, so it's never been an issue. Yesterday, however, I woke up and started my usual "slow roll" and then suddenly realized I had breakfast plans that I had to rush out the door for. After, it was straight into work calls, and then I got the notification from the doctor about things being too high and all the while my mind had completely slipped that I needed take my shot.   Given that I am not asking for medical advice, but sharing my journey, I will note my results: Estradiol at 447 pg/mL and Testosterone was 23 ng/dL, up and down from 26 pg/mL and 526 ng/dL respectively before treatment. Almost flipped the bit! The doc would like my Estradiol closer to 300 pg/mL, so we'll see what Monday's tests state.   Oh, and I teased the dinner with old soccer teammates and never updated the thread! It went well. There were a couple funny moments. One guy, who I was worried about their response, greeted me with "Hey, you've lost some weight!" 😎 And a friend who lives near me picked me up on the way to dinner exclaimed, after we learned one of the invitees might show up with a date, "Wait! We could have brought women?!" To which I instantly responded, "You kind of did, bringing me!" Everyone got a good laugh out of that. 😁
    • Ashley0616
      To me there isn't that much difference other the measurement, which side the zipper is on and men's pants have bigger pockets. 
    • missyjo
      I hope this is not stupid question..I have yet to start n not sure if doc will approve..but once you start growing buds n such, can you still wear forms to get to the size you were?   I'm a dad, so when I start blossoms they will be smaller for a long time n probably need surgical augmented..that's fine. I don't want to go ddd to aa to ddd..   any ideas?   thank you
    • missyjo
      April sounds fun..I keep some boy jeans to visit mom in..fir now   hugs
    • Ivy
      I like them too.  We had them growing up.  But my father's family were Swedes.
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Oh my!  I guess it just goes to show how different tastes can be. Since we don't live near the ocean, Seafood is a rare luxury. We absolutely love pickled herring! Especially my husband and my GF, I guess it's a Ferman/Russian cultural thing.  But most of the kids like it too, and a jar wouldn't last in the pantry for long 😆
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      I think the key to that is just not minding eating the same thing repeatedly. Since we produce a lot of our own food here, we end up eating what is in season at the moment. So, when the yellow squash is ripening, we end up fixing squash 20 different ways. When the strawberries are ready, we eat lots of strawberries. It's kind of a different mindset to eat in season when it has become such a part of American culture but the grocery store has everything we want all the time. Like grapes in December.  My family does even things out a little bit by having a greenhouse so we have some fresh things in the winter, but it's not a 100% fix.
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...