Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

New Feeling / Urge


Guest Amanda Whyte

Recommended Posts

Guest Amanda Whyte

Had a brand new ?feeling? come over me today. I have had toned down dysphoria and other urges to dress before. The urge I had today was to go out dressed. Not ready to do that yet, I want to get someone to help me get ready first. My usual coping mechanisms plus a call to my Sis, Eliza got me through it. I guess I am going to have to make some plans. I see the next step is coming

Link to comment

I have had that urge for the past 18 years but it has only been in the past 2 years that i have been able to... Now my urge is to be a full woman 24/7 and on HRT .... i wounder how long it will be before that comes true.

Link to comment

Hi Mandy,

So...you want to leave the house as yourself?

Seriously, it feels like a big step. My first time out was to see my therapist, a few weeks later my support group, after that my electrologist sessions, then the local Kroger for groceries. I was so nervous the first time I ate in a restaurant, until I realized that NOBODY was staring at me, they were just...you know: eating! The thing is that most people aren't really paying very close attention anyway and women come in all shapes and sizes. Oh and not to forget that some don't seem to have a flair for fashion either. Just stay safe, and remember that women are more vulnerable so you have to pay attention to your surroundings and avoid places that put you at risk.

Hugs,

Shari

Link to comment
Guest Gregg Jameson

Hi Amanda!

I have been wondering how life is treating you!

Yes, sounds like you are approaching your next step!

So glad you can call upon your sister!

I hope you will find the perfect person(s) to assist you in preparing to participate in this next step when you are ready!

Thinking of you and your family, wishing you all the very best!

Brad

Link to comment
Guest Amanda Whyte

I am soo hopeing it happens soon. I have wanted it before but this is the first time I have had an urge to. I know some will say to get myself ready but that is beyond my comfort zone right now. I am hopeing I find someone soon to help me get ready.
Link to comment
Guest ThisisSparkle

I hope this helps. But over the last year i have gone out all doll-ed up. But its a step by step. Start small. Wear some new underwear for a week or 2. Then that with some jeans. Then find some shirts you like. After a while just try adding some light mascara on. Each new thig you add dont watch others reaction, watch your own around others. And above all be yourself, the true you. Allow yourself to feel good. It goes both ways for everyone.

The thing i realized after a while was that if you remebe being young, when you wanted to tey something new, you take your time, but the thrill of doing somethig new is so exciting.

You can do it. Its worth it. It can be a huge step to being you. If nothing else just start by doing stuff around the house all day and see how ya feel. We crawl before we walk, we walk before we run.

Again hope this helps.

Peace

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Just be safe. Find a time and place where you are likely to be accepted and then go for it. It's your life and you have the right to express yourself in your own way no matter how anyone feels about it or what they think.

Many have faced these feelings and successfully ventured out. But I know it's very scary. You have shown great common sense here and I know whenever and however you do this it will be fine

Hugs

Johnny

Link to comment
Guest Maitane

Amanda,

I can tell you this going out as your true self in a way is excited and nerve racking. I am thinking of the day I will go out in public. but know this you will know in your heart when the time is right. don't ever dought yor self allways have a positive attitude I am with you trust your heart

XOXO

Link to comment
Guest Amanda Whyte

Sparkle, I have been wearing panties for months but it is more the opportunity. It is a long story but I just have to work out a chance to go out.

JJ, thanx for the words of encouragement. I will choose a safe place to go out to, when I finally get a chance to go out.

Maitane, thank you also for the words of encouragement, I really appreciate it.

Link to comment
Guest Ney'ite

Amanda, I just wanted to say it is wonderful to see you as you progress on your journey - I am very excited for you and gawd do I remember being where you are now! Others have offered some very good suggestions so there is not really much more I could add, other than the first time I wore something non-male (simply a top) out was to my electrologist, I changed in my car and put on my one and only female shirt I had at the time under my winter jacket (you have winter on your side right now to cover your clothing). Only she saw me, and before I left her office, I put my jacket back on.

It was a wonderful feeling to finally wear something that was "me," even though only one other person saw it. But that did not matter! I already said it but I don't care: I am so very excited for you, Amanda!! :D :D

Link to comment
Guest Elizabeth K

Grin

You are on the way to presenting as your true self. That will liberate you in ways you cannot even understand right now! WOW

But

Baby steps. Take it easy and lean to savor each new step. Its like slipping into a new world - a plunge int the swimming pool of life can be had - but it is better done by gently easing into that deliciously satisfying water.

Lizzy

Link to comment
Guest Amanda Whyte

I have worn a blouse to both of the support groups I have been to, however I cant make myself take off the sweatshirt I were over it. I know that is REALLY silly but I just felt awkward dressing part way. I felt I had to be either (male name) or Mandy.

Link to comment
Guest Ney'ite

I have worn a blouse to both of the support groups I have been to, however I cant make myself take off the sweatshirt I were over it. I know that is REALLY silly but I just felt awkward dressing part way. I felt I had to be either (male name) or Mandy.

That is the neat thing about this, Amanda - you do what is right for *you* and *you* alone at the moment - when *you* are ready, you will add the next step (whatever that is for you - everyone is different).

I love it: Amanda is slowly starting to blossom! :D

Link to comment
Guest Brianna_Denise

Ive been wanting to go out in public as dressed like woman for years so i could buy clothes cuz sometimes theyre so expensive online, best bet if you live in a small town like i do go to a big city. thats what makes me feel comfortable.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Had a brand new ?feeling? come over me today. I have had toned down dysphoria and other urges to dress before. The urge I had today was to go out dressed. Not ready to do that yet, I want to get someone to help me get ready first. My usual coping mechanisms plus a call to my Sis, Eliza got me through it. I guess I am going to have to make some plans. I see the next step is coming

Uh oh... Somebody else is about to open Pandora's box! Before you do it, it can seem like the toughest thing in the world. But after you do it (if nothing makes you scurry back into the closet) you wonder why you didn't do it earlier, or... that was easy, something along those lines anyway. Closets are for clothes or brooms. Not people.

Link to comment
Guest Amanda Whyte

Mackenzie, VERY close to that happening, I think! I do envy the mentor you have in person and SOOO wish I had someone like that. ;)

Link to comment
Guest rikkicd64

Had a brand new ?feeling? come over me today. I have had toned down dysphoria and other urges to dress before. The urge I had today was to go out dressed. Not ready to do that yet, I want to get someone to help me get ready first. My usual coping mechanisms plus a call to my Sis, Eliza got me through it. I guess I am going to have to make some plans. I see the next step is coming

Uh oh... Somebody else is about to open Pandora's box! Before you do it, it can seem like the toughest thing in the world. But after you do it (if nothing makes you scurry back into the closet) you wonder why you didn't do it earlier, or... that was easy, something along those lines anyway. Closets are for clothes or brooms. Not people.

Well said Mackenzie,I don't have any regrets in going out my first time now,I did wonder why I had not done it earlier.Now I have to force myself to wear mens clothes,and when I do,I have on makeup,earrings,pantys,hose and heels.

Thanks,Rikki...

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

As far as forcing myself to wear mens clothes, it never got better. It got a lot worse.I kept looking better everytime I was out (ok, I had my ups and downs, I mean over all) and my "guy" appearance went down the toilet. I really didn't care what I looked like as a guy and it really showed.

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   3 Members, 0 Anonymous, 132 Guests (See full list)

    • Faye1972
    • Petra Jane
    • Karen Carey
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.5k
    • Total Posts
      767.2k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      11,942
    • Most Online
      8,356

    taxicab
    Newest Member
    taxicab
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Amyjay
      Amyjay
      (58 years old)
    2. bettyjean
      bettyjean
    3. Breanna
      Breanna
      (52 years old)
    4. Emily Ayla
      Emily Ayla
    5. JET182
      JET182
  • Posts

    • Susan R
      Love it! This is great news. We need more of this to combat the excessive hate-filled rhetoric and misinformation. 👍
    • Susan R
      The experience was the same for me @April Marie. I slept much deeper and I woke up each morning feeling so much more restful sleeping with forms solidly in place. For me, wearing breast forms at night started when before I was a teenager. I had no access up to modern breast forms and certainly no way to buy mastectomy bras back then. I wore a basic bra my mom had put in a donation box and two pairs of soft cotton socks. I have some crazy memories of things I did in my youth to combat my GD but regardless, these makeshift concoctions helped me work through it all.   All My Best, Susan R🌷
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Colorado isn't exactly a Republican place, and won't become one anytime soon.  I think those folks might be better off not spending their time playing Don Quixote.    We certainly have our share of California "refugees" moving into where I live, so I wouldn't be surprised to start seeing Coloradans too.  I suspect the trend over the next few years will see the blue areas getting more blue and the red areas getting more red as anybody who can relocate tries to find a place where they fit better.   
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Well, at least it'll be a place some folks could choose.  Options are a good thing.
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      My family would have gobbled that jar up in a minute or two.  When we do have pickled herring, its usually for Christmas.  I didn't grow up with that particular dish, but I grew up in a Greek family so I like just about any kind of fish if I can get it.  However, ocean fish and freshwater fish taste so different.  We usually have more catfish and tilapia to eat than anything else.    What I can't quite get used to is the tons of cabbage my GF insists on eating.  When you live with a Russian, there is always cabbage soup.  Always.  When I first moved in with her, breakfast was "shchi" for soup and either bread or "kasha" which is a bowl of boiled buckwheat with butter and salt.  Those dishes can be made in any number of ways, some are better than others.  In the winter, it can even be salty and sour like kraut.  Not exactly sauerkraut, but packed in tubs with vinegar and salt so it keeps partially for the winter.  But I drew the line when the cabbage soup included pieces of fried snake one day.  😆
    • Ashley0616
      Good evening to you as well @Mmindy   That is awesome that you have support from her side. My dad has communicated with me once and that was because he was forced to. His new wife wanted to spend time with my kids. He hated me so much he was in the process of taking my rights away as a parent to my two boys. He was talking to a lawyer and I called him out on it. I don't love him at all. I'll respect him because I wouldn't be here without him but I wished I had another father. My uncles don't talk to me and unfriended me on Facebook. Almost all cousins except for two are still Facebook friends but they don't give me any support. My mom said she won't support me with that but she has said that she loves me. I have nieces and nephews that are still Facebook friends but they have yet to talk to me. I have one sister that supports me out of three. The other's disrespect me by deadnaming me. They have never called me their sister. I think for them they think it's still a phase. They don't ask questions about me being trans. I have to bring it up and on the look of their faces they don't look comfortable about it. 
    • Mmindy
      Good evening @Ashley0616,   I just got offline with HP tech support trying to get my printer tool box icon locked to my tool bar. This is one of the most important features of my printer that I like because it keeps track of ink, paper, and scanned documents. I'm diffidently not a computer geek.   I'll catch up with the other bookmarks next week. We leave to go home for the Easter Holiday with our families. Saturday with her side, and Sunday with my side. What's odd about that is I'm out to more of her side and they're reluctantly supportive. My side on the other hand are less supportive, and my sister just under me in age will not acknowledge my being there. She will be constantly moving to keep from dealing with me. I'm dead to her.   Hugs,   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋  
    • Ashley0616
      I used to follow baseball and the team I would cheer for is Boston Red Sox. My favorite player was Papi. He was an awesome guy and even held a child during the National Anthem. I haven't watched baseball for a long time. It just died off to me. 
    • Ashley0616
      That stinks that nothing transferred, and no bookmarks were saved! 
    • Ashley0616
      I'm doing patches for now but I think soon I'll go to shots because it's hard to alternate when you are doing two xx patches at once. Unless she gives me Estradiol and progesterone
    • Sally Stone
      Go Cleveland Guardians!  I love baseball and I loved playing it when I was younger.  
    • Sally Stone
      My view is we are "dependent" on government, because as a society, we are too lazy to stay actively involved. So, we let politicians do our bidding for us.  I think we'd be in a better place government wise if we policed the actions of our politicians.  We elected them; they work for us.  Sadly, we are allowing them to run amok.  We are where we are because we have chosen to let politicians make all decisions without us.  Remember "by the people, for the people?" That was the intent of our democracy.  Today, however, it is "by the politicians, for the politicians," the people be damned. 
    • Mmindy
      "Play Ball! Batter Up!" is the closing line of the National Anthem as far as I'm concerned. It's the call of the Home Plate Umpire and signals the start of the game. I grew up in the TV and Radio broadcast of the St. Louis Cardinals. Harry Caray, Jack Buck, Tim McCarver, and Mike Shannon, were the voices on my transistor radio. KMOX 1120 AM pushing 50,000 watts of Class A clear-channel non-directional signal. It could be picked up all across MO, IL, IN to the East. KS, OK, CO to the West. IA, MN to the North, and KY, TN, AR to the South. There has always been a rivalry against the Chicago Cubs, in the National League. As for the American League, I have to pull for the Kansas City Royals. I've also been a Little League Umpire, and fan of everything the Little League stands for. Going to Williamsport, PA and seeing the Little League World Series is in my top 10 things to do on my bucket list.   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • Mmindy
      Good evening everyone,   I don't think my mother ever cooked a meal that I didn't like. We also had a kitchen where mom fixed the food, dad filled your plate, and you eat it. It wasn't until our baby brother was born that we could have Pop-Tarts for snacks. Before that all snacks had to meet mom's approval, and in her opinion wouldn't prevent you from eating supper.   Well my day started off on a good note, but has become frustrating because my IT person didn't transfer my saved videos I use for teaching. Then I found out that they didn't save any of my book marks for websites I use frequently.   Best wishes, stay motivated,   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • MaeBe
      The number is relative to method of deliver, the time of the dose, and when the blood is drawn. However, I do want to keep away from DVT and other potential issues. I assume I may be getting backed down from my current dose, but my doc told me to stick with the higher dose, so? I also wonder if this has anything to do the my breast growth and mental changes that have been happening over the past few years, like I have some estrogen sensitivity so a little goes a long way or something? I don't have enough data to postulate, but who knows!   With weekly, subcutaneous, shots you expect to see big swings of serum level estradiol from shot to peak to trough. My doctor is interested in mid-week testing (for E and T levels only), which would be post-peak blood serum levels but they will be higher than trough. Most, if not all, resources I've seen online is to measure at trough (which I might do just to do it next time) along with a SHBG, LH, and other metrics.   This is from transfemscience.org for Estradiol valerate in oil, which is very spiky compared to some other estradiol combinations. It's also for intramuscular, which will have a slower uptake and is usually dosed in higher volume due to the slower absorption rate from muscles. They don't have subcutaneous numbers, which I would expect to see similar spikes but higher levels at similar doses due to the relatively higher absorption rate direct from fat.   Are you doing pills, shots, or patches? And when you do get your levels checked are you getting that done when your levels are lowest or some other time?
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...