Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Hair Dilemma


Guest LauraJen

Recommended Posts

Guest LauraJen

I suspect there might have been a couple of other places I could have posted this in, but if is better suited somewhere else, I apologise.

I went to a local trans group last night and was dressed in role for it. I sat there and didn't feel anything other than complete comfort in how i was presenting. When i was changing back before leaving (as I don't present as female in the real world yet), I took a picture in front of the mirror in the toilets, just as a souvenir of a good occasion.

I look extremely feminine in this pic, not that I am going to show it, not just with what i was wearing, but with my face and figure as well. I would probably pass 95% of the time if I just had longer hair - whether or not that's an actual biological indication of how I developed in the womb is another discussion entirely. I know of a good UK-based shop on eBay which sells wigs and hair extensions at very affordable rates, and they are reliable - they have a very high rating and i have used them in the past (although I recently threw out what I bought from them when I had to purge all of my clothes stash).

I'm just wondering if one had any pros or cons over the other. Wigs have obvious practicality issues, such as not being able to go out if strong winds are forecasted, but with extensions I'm worried about how obvious they'd be if your hair is only 2 or 3 inches to start with. I just wondered if anyone had any guidance.

Thank you for reading,

Laura Jen

Link to comment
  • Admin

Wigs can be fine in wind if you take precautions in how they are put on and attached. You need to be sure the cap adjustment is secure and snug without being too tight, and that the back part is pulled into the bone crease at the back of your head. Several bob pins through the wig wefts into your own hair, and it will survive a speed boat ride upwind. In addition, there are chin straps that attach to the ear tabs of the wig with alligator clips that can also help in a near gale. On the decorative side, a stole or scarf can be worn over the wig the same way other women put them on their regluar hair do's and tied down against the wind.

If your hair is only a couple of inches long, hair extensions won't do you much good, since they need long enough hair to cover the place they are put in and lie down flat over the attachment point. Until your shortest hair at the nape of your neck is 3 to 4 inches long, the wig is a better bet. My hair is very fine, and extensions did not look convincing until it was 6 inches long, but now at about 9 inches long, I have a clip in hair extension that puts me at 24 inches long with a 4 inch overlap that hides the top edge of the extension. There is one way that short hair could have extensions put in, but it is semi-permanent, and VERY expensive to do.

Hope that helps.

Link to comment
Guest LauraJen

Thank you Vicky, that helps enormously. At the moment my hair is 5 inches long, but occasionally i do need to get it cut. I can't just let it grow, otherwise it just becomes a mop and gets in my eyes all the time. The trouble is, when I say to hairdressers I just want it tidied up and only a couple of centimetres off at most, they rarely listen and probably think "Guys shouldn't have long hair" and cut most of it off, which masculinises me again. I still get regularly seen by my mum and that won't change until after I graduate, so a wig looks set to be the ideal short term solution. I'll set about getting one soon.

Thank you for your guidance,

Laura Jen

Link to comment
Guest Szenzie

I've often had the problem with them cutting too much. Now I lay down the law and give my own personal look of death to ensure them I'll be very angry if they cut more than I specify. They want your money and business, even if you have to repeat your self 10 times before they take scissors to your hair. This totally works ^_^

Take your time with wig shopping, Be up front and make sure they understand you're trans. Often times they assume people are just there for costumes or gimmicks (to take cell phone pics) and they will be more willing to help if they know you're really serious about buying a wig. In any case, have fun ^_^

Link to comment
Guest LauraJen

^ OK, thank you Szenzie.

It looks like this topic has been moved. I had a feeling I could have chosen a better forum. Apologies to the mods for having to make them do that.

Laura Jen

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   9 Members, 0 Anonymous, 100 Guests (See full list)

    • VickySGV
    • Adrianna Danielle
    • AllieJ
    • April Marie
    • Betty K
    • MaryEllen
    • Petra Jane
    • Karen Carey
    • KathyLauren
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.6k
    • Total Posts
      768k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,015
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Quillian
    Newest Member
    Quillian
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Bowie Ellis
      Bowie Ellis
      (19 years old)
    2. Damien Mcknight
      Damien Mcknight
      (18 years old)
    3. JJ
      JJ
      (77 years old)
    4. KathyLauren
      KathyLauren
      (70 years old)
    5. memyselfandwe
      memyselfandwe
      (44 years old)
  • Posts

    • April Marie
      Congratulations and Happy Anniversary!!!! A beautiful milestone.    I hope to see you tonight...I just have to stay awake long enough!!
    • Mirrabooka
      It's funny with photos isn't it, how we think we look in them vs. how we actually do look in them! I'm hopeless at smiling and I have to try really hard not to frown or look like a zombie. I'm never sure how I come across to others.   I had a moment late last night when my eldest daughter facetimed my wife for some now forgotten reason, and when I was handed the tablet and talking to her, I was fixated on my image in the corner. My hair was wild at the time, I was a bit tipsy and all I saw was a woman! I have no idea what she saw in that context. I'll probably never know.
    • KathyLauren
      I hope to see you on the Zoom meeting tonight, April.  I might be late, since I am doing lights and sound for a play that opened last night.  I was home before ten last night, so I think I'll be able to make it.   Today is an anniversary for me.  Seven years ago today, I stood up at the weekly community kaffeeklatsch as <deadname> and announced that henceforth I would be Kathy.  It went as well as I could have imagined: there were some surprised looks, but no hostility and lots of support.  A whole layer of stress disappeared that day and has never come back.  (There have been other stresses, but that one is gone.)  I have been me full-time ever since that moment.
    • Mirrabooka
      This is a scarily accurate description of what I feel!   I hope I don't sound too schmaltzy by saying this, but I remember when I signed up to this forum last year, during the sign-up process the question is asked, "Why do you want to join TransPulse?" to which I wrote, "Looking for a home where I can freely write about my issues and interact with similar people."    I think I just found one. ❤️
    • Heather Shay
    • Heather Shay
      When do you know you've had enough surgery?
    • Heather Shay
      Another week completed with more inregration.
    • Heather Shay
      Relief (emotion) Wikipedia https://en.wikipedia.org › wiki › Relief_(emotion)         Relief is a positive emotion experienced when something unpleasant, painful or distressing has not happened or has come to an end.
    • Heather Shay
    • Heather Shay
    • Heather Shay
    • April Marie
      Loving this woman I am becoming.
    • April Marie
      Good morning, everyone!! I was up early again - already on my third cup of coffee having walked/fed the dog and read the local paper.   We have a birthday party for a friend to go to this afternoon but no real plans otherwise.   I hope to be able to attend tonight's TGP Zoom session. It's been weeks since I've been able to participate with the illness/loss of our dog, two horrible colds in succession and our trip to chase the solar eclipse.   Have a wonderful day and look for the goodness in it.
    • April Marie
      I think we tend to be overly critical of our looks, whether we're trying to express ourselves as masculine, feminine or anywhere along the gender spectrum. For me, I use photos as a way to track my progress, to help me find my style and look and to help me find ways to improve myself in posture, looks, make-up, style......   I didn't really think about our FB avatar being public but then realized that when people search they do see it.   Since I'm not out to anyone but my wife, therapist, priest and people here, my FB page remains "that guy." I have created a Bitmoji that is relatively androgynous moving slowly towards the feminine. Long gray hair, earrings, softer features...I'm transitioning it along with myself. :-)
    • April Marie
      I so very much enjoy your posts. This one, though, hit home with me for many reasons. I was commissioned in the Army in '77, as well. Like you, I was not overly masculine in the way that many of our contemporaries were. I (still do) cried at weddings, pictures of puppies and babies, when I talked about bring proud of what my units accomplished and was never the Type A leader. In the end, it worked for me and I had a successful career.   This is, of course, your story not mine so I won't detail my struggle. It just took me much longer to understand what the underlying cause of my feelings was and even more to admit it. To act on it.    Thank you for sharing your story, Sally.
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...