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So what d'you think?


Guest CariadsCarrot

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Guest CariadsCarrot

I recently posted saying that I seem to be passing less recently but I didn't have a picture at the time so now I'm posting a picture and asking for opinions.

If you saw me in the street how would you read me?

Gabe2.jpg

I've also noticed that when I do pass it's usually when people haven't got a good look at my face so I'm including a close up too.

Gabe3.jpg

Gabe

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  • Forum Moderator

You look male to me too. More so than the other pic I have seen and you looked good then.

Maybe it is something in expression-doubt about passing?-or something because your face looks male. Not macho cage fighter but young male.

You are doing good in your presentation. It can be a real challenge for us

Johnny

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Guest LizMarie

The biggest question to me is your eyebrows. They don't necessarily make you look male but they leave open the question of gender whereas the rest of you seems very male.

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Guest CariadsCarrot

Thank you all so much. You've really made my day.

Some of you saying I look like a young male has made me have a thought...a couple of weeks ago I went to buy some cutlery and the woman behind the counter asked my age coz you have to be over 18 to buy it (yeah those dangerous table knives that I'm gonna go stab someone with lol). Now I know always I've been told I look young for my age but seriously, under 18?! I'm 33 for goodness sake! Well I laughed and told her my age and she laughed too and said 'wow you look so much younger than that!'

Well now I'm wondering if it was actually a case of passing and the thought I was a young BOY! At least I'm HOPING she did lol

Gabe

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Guest CariadsCarrot

That makes me so happy to think that.

Y'know it occurs to me that maybe I'm read male more often than I think and I just don't realize it.

Gabe

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  • Forum Moderator

Hey, if an old man like me can be seen as 35 or under you can certainly be seen as under 18! It actually has a lot to do with facial proportions in relation to age that people read unconsciously. I started out as an art minor in college and had a class about it.

Also on one of the programs on trans on Discovery or TLC a year or so ago they mentioned the same thing. They mentioned one of the transmen looking in his 30s while in his 50s and that being typical-that transmen tend to look around 15 years younger than they are.

Kind of annoying when you're really young-I had that happen all the time when young even though not presenting as male. Got carded everywhere till around 40-but the older I got the better I liked it. Now I love it.

At first the weight loss really aged my face but thanks to Bag Balm and a loving Providence it seems to be correcting and I am looking younger again.

Enjoy.

Johnny

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Guest CariadsCarrot

Thanks Johnny. It's kinda interesting but not so bad. I don't do that many things you have to be over 18 for anyway lol

It's interesting to hear that looking younger is usual for transmen.

Being pre-T I kinda see myself as being a young guy anyway...like somehow I'll only get to grow up properly when I get T.

Gabe

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Guest Elizabeth K

Yes - I don't think trans men appreciate it when they are 25 and look 14, but later on it is a big plus. We have 8 guys in our group and you would swear none are over maybe 22 - I know two of them are in their middle 40s.

And the estrogen does a lot of the same for transwomen - especially at first... knocks about 15 years off - nice

Gabe - you look great!

ALL of us pretty well transitioned are read correctly all the time and it takes a while to understand that. We always seem to revert to the old fears we aren't passing because nobody says anything. But we are passing, and passing well. GRIN

And after all, that is what it is all about!

Lizzy

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Guest CariadsCarrot

Thank you Lizzy *grins*

Well I'm 33 and I don't mind so much being read as young really...it's kinda funny really mostly. It also runs in my family to look young too. It's never gonna be for me like it is for my little sister. She has a growth problem so she's 23 and still looks about 11! She probably always will...now THAT'S tough!

Only a week ago my son told me that I just have very feminine features and there's no way I'll ever pass without T. It's really validating to hear everyone's opinion here against that.

I can't wait till passing just gets normal for me. Partly coz I want to be read as male every time and partly coz I don't want it to matter so much to me...I want to be able to just let it go and not even think about it...for it to just feel natural when I'm read as male rather than a cause for celebration.

Gabe

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  • Forum Moderator

My daughter didn't think I'd ever pass either. Neither did my SIL-in fact he thought I was crazy -literally-for thinking I could pull it off. Well my daughter who is coming around slowly got hit with reality when that woman thought I was her husband and my SIL sees me as a man himself now according to what he says to me and what my daughter has told me he says. Actually told me he was wrong and I have become a man. I smiled and said "No, I always was one. But now I do look like it."

And Gabe, I even look like one to me and in my mind's eye now. Which is the hardest of all. Especially after so long living with the other image. I am not a man trapped in a woman's body anymore. I am a man. In a man's body with a few inconsistencies in anatomy. You'll get there too. With us T does make a difference and it works wonders.

BTW when you feel bad about what kind of man T might make you go read about low T and the effect that testosterone therapy has on natal men. It makes us better people too.

I hope-I pray- it happens for you very, very soon. Then you can look like a young man instead of a boy :D

Johnny

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Guest CariadsCarrot

Thank you Brenna, that made me smile

Aw Vanna, *Blushes*

Johnny, I feel like I'm growing up a lot emotionally recently and I can't wait til my body gets what it needs to grow up too. I can't wait for the day when I look at myself and see the man I was meant to be. I'm glad you've got to that place. Your picture has left no ambiguity for some time to anyone else.

It's cool that your SIL made that admission. And as far as our response to him...I think you handle him so well.

Gabe

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Holy crap, you're in your 30s o.o

I should post somewhere...

Ladies, gents, are you looking for a way to look 10 years younger? 20 years younger? Even 30+ years younger? Well the solution to your troubles is here!

And yeah, you look like a guy I know XD Your clothes are a little baggier than his, though.

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Guest CariadsCarrot

ROFLOL yeah the truth is out...the true fountain of youth is so much simpler than people think isn't it!

Well nature had to give up some kinda up point for the agony we go through starting off in the wrong bodies doesn't it!

Seriously though, thank you Xeda. It's so nice to hear people say I look like a guy they know. A great confidence boost.

I've always worn baggy clothes to try to hide the curves that shouldn't be there but they are baggier than usual right now because I'm in the process of loosing weight. I'm still trying to get up the nerve to try wearing something that actually fits properly. I don't even know what size I'd be now.

Gabe

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