A little advise

[Guest Daisy Mae]

I have read lots of posts and have seen that the it is best to see a therapist. Having been unemployed for 3 years I may have a chance for a federal service position (para legal) in Afghanistan in July, would leave in September if I get it. There is a job fair coming up in June in Detroit for vets and have been told that they are hiring on the spot for federal service.

I came out of the closet in 2006 when I retired from the military. Only my wife and children know, I have not told my sisters or mother. Within the last couple of months I have lost my appetite and I am now having trouble sleeping. Usually go to bed around 10pm and will be awake by 2 and stay awake until I finally get up around 6:30am.

I would have to use the VA system since we have no money to spend on therapy. I am 60% disabled from the military due to a back injury before retiring after 24 years of service so I get everything free from the VA. I am afraid to say anything to my VA doctor because I don't want to lose any possibility of getting a job. I really need to land a job and the stress of being unemployed us taking a toll me.

Being a strong introvert, I am not sure on what direction to go and have a real hard problem talking to others especially gender issues.

Any advise or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

[Guest Guest_SL]

Hi Daisy Mae,

In my opinion you may need to see a doctor apart from your gender issues to help with anxiety over your situation. You need only tell them about your sleep loss and appetite just to get your physical state a bit more stable. Hard to deal with anything when you're run down.

Anything you impart to a doctor, VA or other wise, is confidential but I understand your concern. Perhaps you might see a VA PC and mention the fact that you have a lot on your mind and need to speak to a therapist. Once you see a therapist, you can address your gender issues in a nonspecific approach and go from there. This is something on which I can only advise and offer an opinion. I can't see any reason your gender issues would hurt your chances for a job but again, if you have concern, you have to take that into account.

This is a good place, introvert (As I am) or not to air all your gender concerns and questions. In your place, I'd get your physical concerns addressed first and you may see things more clearly.

Anything I can do to help, I'll be more than happy. I'm retired and a disabled Vet in the VA system so I can relate. But in the end, you'll have to decide what's best for you and your family.

Sara Lee