Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
Guest Andrew_is_awsome

Adrogyne? Or Ftm?or?

Recommended Posts

Guest Andrew_is_awsome

I am banging my head against the wall. I am utterly confused.

I question myself. What am I? Who am I?

Am I FTM?

Am I Androgyne?

I don't even know anymore!

how do I find out?

what do I do?

I am female, but I feel male.

I love the male side of life, but there are still things about being female that I love.

:banghead::wacko:

help? :blush:

Share this post


Link to post
Sally

Oh Andrew,

I hate to say that phrase that you see so much here, but a gender therapist is your best chance to help you find yourself.

Sometimes we are so eager to resolve all of our problems that we jump to onclusions - never a good idea, and the answers that you find will effect the reat of your life!

My therapist refers to your 'level of comfort' and that is what you must find!

You might not need to go all the way to male - there is no right or wrong here, just what is right for you!

Love ya,

Sally

Share this post


Link to post
Guest Donna Jean

Hey Andrew.....

You know, Sally is right..."Comfort level", great words for us gender gifted people....

Gender is like a scale...1-10 Male/Female

Some people are ones and some are tens...all of the rest of us fall in between somewhere...we're all the 7's and 3's and 5's.. :D

What ever number you feel comfortable on, well,there ya be! ;)

Now, quit banging your head...you are beating up our wall... :lol:

We love ya!

Donna Jean

Share this post


Link to post
Guest androgynous
My therapist refers to your 'level of comfort' and that is what you must find!

You might not need to go all the way to male - there is no right or wrong here, just what is right for you!

Love ya,

Sally

Such a good answer, I concur. Maybe a bit cliche, but for me personally: what feels good? and that can be anywhere on the gender spectrum.

Share this post


Link to post
Guest Evan_J

Andrew, dude....(gives ya a helmet and a bottle of Tylenol....).....they're right. You don't have to choose one or the other you just have to find out who you are. Gender therapist. Call.

Share this post


Link to post
Guest Andrew_is_awsome

thanks you guys...i think i have calmed down a bit...

still confused as hell, but i am working on it.

i am trying to get a gender therapist...the waiting list is long though...

Share this post


Link to post
Guest mia 1

Andrew you are awesome The last two sentences in your original posts says it all You are female but feel male, an you love both sides!! That comment brings warmth to my soul. You are spot on young Andrew and you'll be just fine.

The list is long for gender therapists I found that out myself but the wait is worth it. Meanwhile so enjoy your two sides of life, and consider yourself blessed. Mia.

Share this post


Link to post
Guest Irielle

Andrew -

I agree with the other posts - find the place on the gender map where you are comfy and enjoy yourself. A gender therapist is worth the wait so hang in there. You mention you are genetic female but feel male; I am genetic male and feel female, but not enough to make the transition. I have too much boy still in me for that. No matter where you wind up on the gender map, remember that YOUR map is in color and the binarys' maps are in black and white!

Big hug

Irielle

Share this post


Link to post
Guest ericc
I am banging my head against the wall. I am utterly confused.

I question myself. What am I? Who am I?

Am I FTM?

Am I Androgyne?

I don't even know anymore!

how do I find out?

what do I do?

I am female, but I feel male.

I love the male side of life, but there are still things about being female that I love.

:banghead::wacko:

help? :blush:

Well male and female are only sexes. Masculinity, Femininity and Androgyne are Genders that you feel inside like that you are talking about.

I think you are Androgyne. Masculine Androgyne.

If you were a FTM, you would actually be a Man trapped in a women's body and feel that you need to get out ASAP.

So I would think that you are Masculine Androgyne! ;) And I think that's cool, I like Masculine Women personaly. ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Guest CharlieRose
If you were a FTM, you would actually be a Man trapped in a women's body and feel that you need to get out ASAP.

Well, that actually might depend. I thought I was some sort of androgyne for a long time, but it was just because I wasn't ready to accept that I was a transsexual. It took a bit of waiting and seeing, experimenting, and asking myself deep questions, like "Would I want to be someone's husband? Would I want to be called "he" all the time? Would I want to change my name?" stuff like that, and even then it was a while before my answers became unequivocally "YES!"

Share this post


Link to post
Guest CharliTo

I second what Charlie is saying... I'm still basically in androgynous mode myself right now...

...and initially I had the same thoughts...but even though I'm pretty scared still yet, I think I'm getting more and more comfortable with being out.

Take your time, I think those like you and me just have anxiety to deal with...but in the end, since I am kinda a tomboyish transgirl, I think it's just good to settle with what you are comfortable with. =)

Do you know any FTM males in real life? Maybe observing how they are in real life can help too. It's been really helpful for me to see other MTFs in daily lives.

Charlene

Share this post


Link to post
Guest Casey

Maybe you are just a person who can like anything you want wether society says it is for females or for males ;)

Share this post


Link to post
DaHudie Biz

I agree . . . Don't get caught up on labels.  They don't really matter.  Plus, they are all so political.  Trust me I know.  Be yourself and be HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Share this post


Link to post
bluemoon321

As an androgyne, I realize the kinds of struggles we go through in a mostly dualistic gender world with many limited or narrow minded people in it. I just want to tell those who are struggling with their gender identity that once you find out who you are and accept both or all parts of you, you will come to love yourself and realize that you have the best of both or multiple worlds. On a practical level, your extra-gender qualities mean you can have a wider range of skills and potentials. On a social level, you have extra knowledge and traits to help capture the interest, attraction, friendships, and attractions of those you want. Of course, there are always people who don’t click, like, or accept you or anyone else whether it’s related to gender or any number of things. There are many things I like about myself and a few things I don’t, but being androgynous is not only a main or core aspect of me but one of the ones that I absolutely love the most. My favorite people are usually androgynous to different degrees and I only wish I knew more.

Share this post


Link to post
StephanieVikingGirl

Hi bluemoon,

I noticed this is your first post, so welcome to the playground.  I love androgynous folk, at least the ones I have met.  I agree that accepting oneself, all of oneself, is so important to achieve happiness.  In any case, there are lots of nice accepting folk here, so you might want to introduce yourself over in that section.   :) 

Stephanie

Share this post


Link to post
tracy_j

Hi bluemoon

Welcome :)

I really feel for what you say. I think that after considering many things and opinions here the most staraightforward way of putting things is - 'androgybe is me!'

I really love the way you put it

Tracy

Share this post


Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

  • Who's Online   6 Members, 0 Anonymous, 10 Guests (See full list)

    • Cbxshawn
    • amanda is cute MK3
    • KatrinaReann
    • MaryMary
    • Billie66
    • MaryEllen
  • Topics With Zero Replies

  • Posts

    • TessaOKC
      Here we go again Carolyn!!! You throw meaningful articles out there that usually result in really good  debates, thank you !!!   I have read two books by Jen Boylan and she is as real as they get. I also like that she's from Maine !!   The listed article really hit home while reading a quote from Kristen Beck, “What you wear, what color you are, your religion, race, ethnicity, sexual orientation, gender identity has no basis on whether you are a criminal or not.”  Yes indeed. I support Eric Snowden and the courage it took for him to expose unprecedented abuses of power by the United States. His motives were clear, his intentions were more than obvious. Perhaps I still need more understanding,  but I have yet to wrap my head around the motives and intentions of the information released by Chelsea Manning...??? All I do know is that there is a sea of negativism surrounding her  and now her unqualified run for public office.   I spend hours every week at the  VA hospital attending LGBT group meetings. The horrible comments and ridicule I see on a weekly basis toward our transgender Vets walking the halls is unmatched by what I have experienced in public. A good friend straightened me out on this. He says the VA is filled with  right wingers. Yes it appears this is true. Since this whole Chelsea Manning running for Senate thing started it has gotten even worse, trust me!   I have posted on this site previously  that I merely wish Manning could be grateful for being free and go live a quiet, happy  and public free life. Jen Boylan echos this. I oh- so- admire the piss and vinegar Manning has but she is in fact a convicted felon embodied in a sea of perceived public hatred.   Like the hateful Vets at the VA, I don't think we will ever change their minds about accepting trans humans. . Not in this lifetime. Say what you will but it is my true belief that we need positive examples. Though she's not my favorite but Kristen Beck is right up there. Retired Navy Seal that served with honor and distinction. The author of this article, Professor Jennifer Boylan is another. This list goes on and on, doctors, lawyers, politicians, successful entrepreneurs . I support Chelsea manning as a trans woman and human being. I do not support her for a  Senate run, and her public exposure merely adds fuel to the fire of hatred already directed toward innocent trans people like me and you ......   In the brutal world of public opinion there is a saying; "Its not what you are but what people think you are."  I love and deeply respect our transgender community. You will never find such courageous people as represented in the transgender world. We proudly serve in  every profession, military branch, labor force and service industries. We never ask for recognition or a pat on the back, all most of us want is to be allowed to live our authentic lives free of murder, rape and ridicule.  Is Manning helping that cause?? What is your opinion??   Sincerely,   Tess
    • Gwen
      Thanks for your thoughts and especially this, Laura Beth. Many of us may have faced clues along the way and didn't understand them until much later in life. It wasn't until I came out to myself, with the help of a therapist, that the confusion I faced throughout my life finally made sense. And yes, the future is brighter.   Gwen
    • Timber Wolf
      Good morning everyone!❤   Happy Birthday rorylm!🎂 Hope you have a wonderful day!   Lots of love, Timber Wolf🐾
    • Charlize
      Ms. Boylan has such an honest rational voice.  Manning's candidacy may or not be helpful for our community.  It may go nowhere but she does have every reason to be angry. In my opinion did little more than was done by reporters in the past who were actually able to report what they saw during Viet Nam rather than only reciting what they were told by the military.   Many may not agree with me about that and that is fine but allowing us to see some of the atrocities of the war was in some ways an heroic, if illegal, act.  That being said i'm certainly not sure that makes her any more qualified for office than being a slumlord in NY does.   Hugs,   Charlize  
    • Charlize
      One of the great advantages of going to a therapist was having an opportunity to remember and share a lifetime of experiences similar to those you describe.  Somehow being open and honest was a step i needed in finding the strength and confidence to follow my path.   Thank you for reminding me of my past as well as sharing your own.   Hugs,   Charlize
    • tracy_j
      It all gets a bit complicated at times   Here it it a standing joke about not having to see someone's medical records to know their issues, just sit in the reception at the doctors surgery and listen to the receptionist! Not really funny, but it happens a lot.   For me it is a daily thing as I am not planning a namechange etc in the near future, but only occasionally gets too much. Its always going to be easier wth one name and one gender.   Tracy
    • tracy_j
      Hi Tali Welcome   Tracy x  
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://www.nytimes.com/2018/01/18/opinion/chelsea-manning-senate.html?mtrref=t.co&assetType=opinion&_r=0   Carolyn Marie
    • Rachel Gia
      Hi, Although the basis of my meditation come from a book on Buddism the spiritual aspect of my life is based around being thankful for what I have and for the people I know and to participate with that which is around me the basis of which is understanding and practicing love. i like Buddism a lot but prefer if people use their own words when conveying something.  If I had the determination and attention span to read the Quoran and find a Master I would say I would align myself with Sufism but that's not going to happen so I have to be content being an Abrahamist with Big Book leanings. This is not my own words but sort of in fact. Love God (your version) and treat others with kindness and love:) The rest is commentary. Reading this made things easy for me. In light of the simplicity I feel that spirituality should not possess an inaccessible quality to it.  Why I like Sufism is the belief that "love is the highest station of the soul."
    • ElissaMtF
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. rorylm
      rorylm
      (68 years old)
  • Upcoming Events

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      64,702
    • Total Posts
      585,793
  • TransPulse Partners

×