Free

[Guest Jennifer T]

One of my earliest poems from my childhood. "Freedom" was a deep heart cry. I also do artwork and there is an accompanying drawing to this one. Anyway:

I want to be free;

Free to know who I am and not feel shame

I want to fly;

Fly as valiant as an eagle, yet as listless as a butterfly

I want to sing;

Sing my hearts desire through the voice of many waters

Relentlessly challenging eternity

I want to be free.

[Guest]

As we all do Dear.

That is very touching Jennifer.

Huggs,

Joann

[Guest Jaques]

lovely Jennifer..........thank you

[Charlize]

We all want that flight and freedom. Sometimes it seems to happen sometimes the chains won't let go. May we all shed those chains and fly.

Hugs,

Charlie

[Guest Jennifer T]

Thank you, all. Yes Charlie, may we all fly.

Peace.

[Guest miss kindheart]

Free free

Just like me

you are you

And i am me

What we are

We might not see

But for sure

We all are free

So can't you see

That you can be

Anything you see

In thee

So be not sad

Instead be glad

For you can fly

into the sky

<<< hug >>>

vanna

[Guest Paradox]

Now, THAT is incredible! Thank you!

[Guest Jennifer T]

Vanna,

Me”

I shall not now or ever be

that me I dreamed myself to be

for in that me I fear I see

someone who isn’t really me

in times of old when i was three

i could not comprehend or see

that someday I’d grow up to be

less than the one I’d hope for me

then one day at ten and three

I learned to dream; thereby to see

a hope of what may never be

but dream I did, a me as she

skip ahead to twenty-three

becoming what I thought I’d be

and finding more and more in me

the swelling lie I’d someday see

but time goes by at thirty-three

a dreamer dies; there is no me

in reflection now i only see

someone else staring at me

and now approaching forty-three

slowly accepting who i see

as no more or less the core of he

who was she when I was three

i look ahead to fifty-three

and wonder what it holds for me

will i dream another me

and wake one day only to see

that then I’m old at sixty-three

no longer dreaming dreams of me

my life has passed and then I’ll see

only in death will I be free

for life is like a web we weave

our dreams assuredly deceive

and teach us only to believe

a lie of things not as they be

and readily we seek to please

the self of life who dreams of ease

yet knowing only lies we tease

and truth before us surely flees

now i know my dream of me

isn’t who i thought i’d see

from depths of time peering at me

the corpse of me...

...who was only three.

- Jennifer T, September 15, 2004

[Guest]

You're both wonderful.

Huggs,

Joann

[Guest miss kindheart]

Ten or three

or eighty three

It matters not

As we can see

That we are

Just like the star

Our life and warmth

It goes so far

Look inside at your heart

not the end but at the start

You flew above

Just like a dove

Your mother gave you

Such true love

No matter what

Your life is blessed

Now be that girl

And wear that dress

<<< hug >>>

vanna

[Guest angels wings]

Wow magnificent

Angel (((((((((hugs)))))

[Guest Jennifer T]

You made me smile, Vanna. :-)

I wrote this for a friend of mine years ago. I share it here with you and all who know this path:

Amidst the voice of daily thrum,

A silent, steady, beating drum

Of heart and hope for you does beat

That on this day a calm may greet

To press the throe and pang of life

Relinquish fear and doubt and strife

And in the void a calm embrace

May swiftly move to take its place

And fill you with a tranquil peace

Turmoil and disarray to cease

My prayer for you this day is such

Because your friendship means so much

For one like you who knows the pain

Of earthly trials; of fear and strain

But seeks the beauty in the rose

And deep within he sees, he knows

That in the soul glory resides

Redeems the day and time abides

Patiently it tends the light

Seeking truth and all that’s right

My wish for you this day shall be

A day of love and harmony

But if the day retorts demands

Look to the folds within your hands

And know that there exists as these

Likewise hearts that beat for peace

And with such hands we work to grow

The love the heart would seek to know

I pray for you a day of grace

Radiant joy upon your face

Enjoy the timeless depths serene

Of love that by the heart is seen.

- Jennifer T, May 8, 2003

[Guest angels wings]

Bravo Bravo wonderful words lovey .

Angel

[Guest miss kindheart]

Thanks for the words of kindness from all

<<< hug >>>

Love your poetry Jennifer

vanna

[Guest Jennifer T]

Thank you Vanna. I've enjoyed our 'poetic' discourse! :-)

Peace this day!

[Guest Brenda Hailey]

I did not realize there was a treasure trove of poems hidden in here.

I like them ALL.

63 without dreams? then what is there to lose? (nothing)

Vanna I was all smiles after

"Now be the girl

And wear that dress.

[Guest Jennifer T]

63 without dreams? then what is there to lose? (nothing)

)

Everything.

[Guest Brenda Hailey]

63 without dreams? then what is there to lose? (nothing)

)

Everything.

Why then do we suffer this way, is it to teach the extent at which we can never be,or to show the direction of who we really are and can ?

Why are we endowed with such great yearning with no practical way of expressing?

Which one is to be greater denial or acceptance? and how are we to truly know which is the way unless we experience both?

How do we know which battle is the one to be fought for and won?

Is it destiny or just cruel twist of fate nature has placed in us to suffer in these ways to live impossible choices. Pride,strength, and courage though denial of a childs dreams or Pride strength and courage of denial of everything we know is in us and never goes away?

The situation hopeless at best no matter which side of the mirror you choose to live for.

Maybe it is a blessing to no longer dream at 63,how many make it that far to see the merit in such an achievement?

For me at least I fortunately still question with a sense of the child that is still in me wanting to blossom at any cost, having lived a large portion of life already "without" any dreams,the beckoning of death my only reward,I find little solace in the now for a promise of a blissful existence after this one is gone. I wish I could just put it all away and wait for the day of reckoning if that were possible and the way then the suffering is for what end?

It can all be summed up in one word "WHY"

I dont expect you to answer these questions they are for myself as much for anyone else,,,just questioning out loud to hear myself think,because I dont know squat about this life.

[Guest Jennifer T]

Hi Brenda. Good questions. And I wrote out a lengthy reply. But came to the realization that I cannot answer those questions for you. (Yes, I know you weren't asking me to, but I also know I cause you a certain amount if anguish with this.) I can only answer them for me.

Remember the scene in "The LotR" where Galadriel is tempted to take the ring when Frodo offers it to her?

This is where I feel I am. And I hope to be able to say at the end:

"I have passed the test. I will diminish and go into the west, and remain Galadriel."

Because for me, my path asks this of me.

And at the end, the Iluvatar awaits, with harmony and restoration...

[Guest Brenda Hailey]

Hi Brenda. Good questions. And I wrote out a lengthy reply. But came to the realization that I cannot answer those questions for you. (Yes, I know you weren't asking me to, but I also know I cause you a certain amount if anguish with this.) I can only answer them for me.

Remember the scene in "The LotR" where Galadriel is tempted to take the ring when Frodo offers it to her?

This is where I feel I am. And I hope to be able to say at the end:

"I have passed the test. I will diminish and go into the west, and remain Galadriel."

Because for me, my path asks this of me.

And at the end, the Iluvatar awaits, with harmony and restoration...

Jennifer you do not cause me any anguish and if you did it certainly wouldnt be anymore that I already have for myself.

Your insight on these issues is very important to me,even though we seemingly happen to be on different paths I feel you and I share a thin but very sturdy common ground.

Not to say I understand all the reasons you do what you need to do in order to survive ,because I myself can barely come to conclusions why I do what I feel I need to do.

Even though there are many things about our journeys that are completely different I have grown very fond of the ability to talk to you and share things with you that I dont always understand,to me you hold a unique perspective on all of this that I admire even if I dont get it all now the experience I am sure is going to be helpful at some point in the future when I least expect it.

This may surprise you but using analogies from Lord of the Rings is useless on me at this point , I am quite possibly the only human left on Earth who has not read or watched the Lord of the rings.

I know what your thinking.......wow what a sheltered life I must have lived. Having seen endless previews and merchandise I think I most related to the ugly little creature,but never felt compelled enough to watch and find out what all the fuss is about.

If this is all a test how and when do we know we passed? Does the test only end at deaths door or can we pass the test before that and live in peace before death?

I cant believe I am now contemplating watching Lord of the rings after all this time.....Looking back I guess I took some form of pride in not watching it,,,,,I wonder what thats all about.

Have a good day Jennifer and just remember you are not causing me anguish quite the opposite is true.

[Guest Jennifer T]

Hi Brenda. If you like to read, read the novels before watching the movies. It's worth it. And if you want a real challenge, read the 'Silmarillion" by Tolkein first. You'll understand a more. But if not, the movies are well done and can stand on their own.

This "test" I refer to is mine alone. I could not and would not apply such things to others. We must all answer our own callings. And thank you for your kind words.

Peace.