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This is from Loqua, The forums are not working for her


jenerosity

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Hello mother, I am your child.
I want a talk with you.
Don't make a note, to have it filed.

I remember how we used to talk,
Innocent work gossip,
I try to speak, and yet you balk.

Do you love me? I cannot tell.
Your distance quells my heart,
But I love you, hope you are well.

I know you work, very hard at that.
When will you hear my words?
I'm your daughter, that is a fact.

I understand, you birthed a son,
born healthy, happy, strong.
It should not change, or be undone.

Toy swords and blocks, train tracks and cars,
They held my attention.
Blue stripes on clothes, or even green stars.

You saw a boy, this much I see,
Full of energy and glee.
This was your truth, I can not disagree.

So what is wrong? Would you listen please?
I am still your child.
That is still true, no one will tease.

Outside the church, that's where I park.
Alone i sleep in my car,
Wondering why, crying in dark.

Your words sting me, when we do speak.
Am I unimportant?
I don't see love, it looks so bleak.

Do I matter, or am worth care?
Can I hear 'I love you?'
It hurts so much, so hard to bear.

Those words mean much, but were not said.
It has been seven years.
'I'll never hear,' I really dread.

I think 'what if's, in dark of night,
I think 'would you miss me?'
It feels like not, fills me with fright.

Emails promised, never gotten.
Wondering if you care,
I wait alone, I'm downtrodden.

Will you hear me? I am still here.
I wait on hope's high cloud,
Drifting on down, nothing is clear.

Maybe I'm wrong, if you don't care,
I won't hear 'I love you.'
Listen to me, I give this dare.

I will not stay, hurt me anymore.
Say to me what you mean.
I'll tell you now, not at the door.

I am your child, am your daughter.
I won't let you hurt me,
Not anymore, nor will father.

I'm moving on, without you now,
I wish you would come with.
I cannot wait, no grace endow.

Goodbye mother, I am your child.
You showed how much you care,
Actions speak loud, your words were mild.

And please tell me, if I am wrong.
I do hope I am wrong,
I want to hope, as my heartsong.
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  • Forum Moderator

A lovely poem which certainly expresses the difficulty we often face as we deal with those we love but who simply cannot accept us.

If this currently expresses your world i hope you hear the words: i love you, soon and often. We all need the love of others.

Hugs,

Charlize

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Guest Kalie Aowynn

That was horrible and it was beautiful and so many things in between. I wanted to cry the whole way through it and scream out to them what is wrong with you.

I also saw my life in there. The hurt I felt when i told my mother and when she said nothing.Just sat there and after an hour finally said "I knew there was something different with you . Something wrong in you."

I swore they would never hurt me like that again. And i have been on this journey alone until this last year when i found Laura's-Playground and some of the folks here in Arizona.

That was a wonderful poem hun and I was captivated by it.

Kalie

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Guest Loqua

Thank you for your comments. I finally managed to get a forum account setup and not fighting me like it had when I had tried a year ago. I didn't expect it to be nearly as good as people say, but it was nice to hear that it was.

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