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As God Made Us


Guest Elizabeth K

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Guest Elizabeth K

Its not my intent to be starting anything controversial here, so I ask that all replies are within the rules and guidelines set forth by Laura in the pinned topics in the Sprituality Rules Forum Heading. And this may lean a little bit toward venting for me. I found this statement by one of our esteemed leaders here as I was reading through some very old TOPICS

On the often voiced attack, 'Why can't we gender dysphoric accept ourselves as God made us?' - the reply was:

Bigots often quote the Bible to justify things of this nature. You're right ... Jesus preached love, not condemnation

That hits home for me. There has been a tremendous amount of discussion on this type of attack. We at Laura's have been giving serious replies in the forum - we have been giving humerous replies in the forum.

BUT

How does each one of us defend against it personally - I mean what do each of you say? I know what I do, but it is a personal thing, I want to know how others respond?

I never know where these things go, but I would REALLY like to see serious answers. And if you are not spiritural, I want to know about what you would say as well. And if you do not have a religious direction toward Bible based Christianity, such as many of the buddism practitioners here, Taoists, or those embracing paganisn, I especially would like to hear what you would do when asked, 'Why can't we gender dysphoric accept ourselves as God made us?'

EVERYONE of us gets asked this very question eventually - it's almost a 'right of passage' and you aren't really part of the community until you have had to defend against it.

Trouble maker

Lizzy

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this hits home very much for me too. gender seems on the surface to be a painfully irrelevent thing, yet the rift of body and soul tears me apart in such anguish that it cant be explained in mere words. this question has troubled me because i'm not sure what the sorce is. i know the reality, but i dont know the 'why'. my only guess is that it lies in some basic fundemental way our brain processes infomation. even though it is subtle, a transgendered person can not make their brain work on the deepest level, and so, nothing they can construct can last or bring fulfillment. that is what it is for me, but i hardly know other's story, so for the big whole, i'm clueless. i'll be tracking this topic, because some people on this site are very smart, and i'd love to see what they think.

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No one remains 'as God made us' because to do so one would have to stop growing and changing from the moment that life officially begins and I'm not going to debate when that is.

Life itself is a process of evolution and we grow according to a plan or a map - DNA holds the keys, but it seems for some of us the map has a bad fold and is hard to read so some develop club feet, cleft palates or transgendered.

We find as a society in general that correcting club feet and cleft palates is just fine, however correcting transgendered is a sin and an abomination.

We don't ask everyone who dyes their hair, "Why don't you stay as God made you?"

We don't ask men who take HGH or Steroids, "Why don't you stay as God made you?"

We don't ask people with tattoos, piercings or breast implants, "Why don't you stay as God made you?"

That question has been reserved for us, why?

Because most people can see a club foot and know that if it were on the end of their leg, they would fix it.

Most people can not comprehend the plight of the transgendered and rather than take their minds out for a little intellectual and compassionate stroll they simply turn away and grab the book of all answers, THE HOLY BIBLE!

The problem is that while they are busy looking up the answers, they have never learned what the questions really are.

To me the BIBLE shows us the way - Jesus never failed to help someone because they were different.

We should treat people the same way - I have a lot of things in life that I do not understand, but rather than judging and telling them that they are wrong, I try to understand and give them room to live the way that they feel is right for them.

That is all I ask of anyone.

Love ya,

Sally

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Guest Zabrak

I was asked this question by a family member and still get "so are you feeling any better because of doing this or will you accept that god made you this way?"

Online I'm wordy, in real life I say nothing. I look at them and either leave or change the subject. I refuse to be bullied into a conversation that makes me uncomfortable. They just brought it up because they make ideals into something selfish and hateful and think their being helpful and insightful.

I have often been called the strong and silent type. It drives my family crazy because I wont be persuaded into anything.

<--- Is also called cold and heartless in real life. Which isn't true but I guess I just rub people the wrong way. :P

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Guest michelle.butterfly
On the often voiced attack, 'Why can't we gender dysphoric accept ourselves as God made us?' - the reply was:
How does each one of us defend against it personally - I mean what do each of you say? I know what I do, but it is a personal thing, I want to know how others respond?

I was raised Southern Baptist and have spent a lot of time thinking about this question although never been asked directly.

I guess I would bring up some examples; what about someone with a cleft palate? spina bifida? Should we just accept the way God made us if we have these physical issues? Or, what about if we get cancer should we just let that grow because God gave it to us?

But how about this: I do accept the way God made me and I am taking the steps He has provided for me that allow me to bring the mind/brain he gave me into congruence with my body. I have spent a lot of time looking at the evidence that God has given me, and I'm certain this is the path He intended for me; it is not for you to judge whether or not I am correct, that is reserved for God. Please worry about your own path.

With much love,

Michelle

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Guest April63

I don't have an answer to this question. I mean, I can't think of any. I guess the only thing I can really say is, I just want to be a girl. There's nothing wrong with my male body, I just want to be a girl. I want that feminine look. The feel. The being. The essence. Why? Who knows.

April

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Guest Christy.dancer

Well, God made everything, right? And we (humans) have never ceased to screw with just about everything we touch. The food you're eating? It's the result of centuries of hybrids, breeding, and cloning. God NEVER made a seedless watermelon, yet I ate some for breakfast. (For that matter, God didn't make Granola, and I had some of THAT yesterday). You think for one minute God made rayon? Polyester? Wash-n-wear ANYTHING?

By the way, did you ride in an automobile today? Or any form of transportation that required refined fossil fuel?

I'm going to the dentist next week. By this logic, I should skip that, and just let God's little cavities take over my mouth.

Which begs the question... how 'bout dem vaccinations? Eh?

Anyone's Aunt Susie ever had a hip replacement? HUH?????

GGRRRRRRR..............................

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Guest Elizabeth K
I don't have an answer to this question. I mean, I can't think of any. I guess the only thing I can really say is, I just want to be a girl. There's nothing wrong with my male body, I just want to be a girl. I want that feminine look. The feel. The being. The essence. Why? Who knows.

April

That works!

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On the often voiced attack, 'Why can't we gender dysphoric accept ourselves as God made us?'

People who say this assume that God doesn't make mistakes and that everyone is born perfect. The facts are that many are born with minor and major birth defects (Down's Syndrome) or genetic links predisposed to disease and illness through the gene pool. It's in the genes and the system is far from perfect. Some defects are natural anomolies that effect one in every so many thousand births which explains us. Breast cancer, Schizophrenia, diabetes, and many others can run in families through our DNA. Is this God's fault? Of course not. It's also arrogant to assume that God took the time to pick on us personally and inflict pain and suffering on us. Certainly God's to do list is too full to pick on one person. He's way to busy. Genetics and the luck of the draw are a fact of life. Stuff Happens :) . Fortunately He made us smart enough to deal with it.

The good news is that there are specific treatments for all of these things. So if you think about it he gave us the tools to correct things that are wrong. Treatment of Transgender people is covered by the Wpath Standards of care which are supported by the AMA and both APA's. SO what makes more sense to follow a bible verse from hundreds of years ago not written about us specifically or to follow our Doctors who are experts? Maybe God made the birth process itself. However the only two people who were in the room when I was conceived was my Mom and dad. :)

Laura

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Guest April63

I think what people mean when they ask the questions is, why aren't you happy with your body. It's not that they believe God doesn't make mistakes (I believe He doesn't by the way), or that everyone is made perfect. It is that they believe an MTF person to truly be a male wanting to be female, not a female in a male's body.

April

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Guest Kelly Ann

HMmmm Liz...actually I like the way God started out with me...and going forward, who knows? I'll always be me...goofy and giggling and grinning down a bear :blink: I think we are put here and are but a blank slate that is always a work in progress...it's up to the individual to come to terms with what they wish for...nobody else with do it actually. The Blue Fairy only helped a little wooden boy with a nose that grew when he lied. Big hug, Kelly Ann

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Guest Madison_Always

Adam and Eve were created w/ perfect genes the more creation develops the less perfect our genes become. Throw in sin and genetic issues abound, at least thats how i see it :) I'm sure God didnt want us all to be born into these trials but God wants us to rely on Him and sometimes no matter what we have just got give our issues to Him and let Him work life out

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Guest Elizabeth K

Let me start my saying the POINT of the topic was WHAT DO YOU SAY when someone says "Why are you not happy as God made you?".

I personally believe in a Creator, which is God the Father, Goddess the Mother, and the unknowable GODHEAD. I term the Creator 'GOD' in my postings to keep from getting into controversy. I am a combination Methodist-Wiccan-Catholic. My soul is a piece of GOD, so I am DEVINE in the sense of being a part of CREATION.

My reply would be:

GOD made me transsexual. I have studied my entire life to find a meaning in that and am still questioning why. BUT I personally asked GOD for resolution and he has led me to transition. To deny my right to transition is to deny GOD's will.

And it happened that way - a DEVINE introvention of supernatural nature I can never reveal because there are no words. And it involved me speaking directly with the Creator.

The intent for the posting? What kind of power is everyone using against the prejudice? What is everyone using for resolving the battle with that insane question, why aren't you happy as God made you? An I don't know if it is a Christian thing or not, but so often the Bible is quoted by those speakers. Their intent is to condemn us. I also feel strongly it makes them feel morally superior. It's horrible how a person THINKS he is Christian and yet can deny Jesus's commands to love others.

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Guest StrandedOutThere

I got the "why can't you just accept your body the way God made you" question right off the bad, during my TG infancy. I was maybe only a couple of weeks old. I didn't have an answer.

I don't have a good one now. Since I don't consider myself religious, it isn't a huge concern. However, I wish I had a decent answer for my mom. I think it would make her feel better.

My feelings are very strong on this issue. Gender identity and sexual orientation are not moral choices, they are something you are born with. I've been attracted to women and identified with being male since I can remember...long before I had the capacity for moral choice. This is something I have explained to people over and over. My present view is that I don't see any way people can condemn SRS without also condemning any kind of surgery or medical treatment.

Now, there are some verses in the New Testament that pretty clearly speak out against homosexuality. I don't know what to say about those. I've got no answers.

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Now, there are some verses in the New Testament that pretty clearly speak out against homosexuality. I don't know what to say about those. I've got no answers.

I always remind myself that the Bible was mostly written by people years later with a few exceptions. And all of the books have been reviewed and revised by various councils as well as having bee traslated so many times - each translationcauses different problems. It doesn't sit well with a lot of Christians but I ama Christian by belief and by deeds so I can not judge anyone else and I don't think that I really need to listen to those who want to condem me. Jesus even spared an adulteress - the "let he amoung you who is without sin caste the first stone." story and that is forbidden in the Ten Commandments - his point is that we are not the judges, he also forgave the robbers that were crusified with him - I can't believe that we are just supposed to do nothing, that is why we have brains in the first place, whether in the right or wrong body.

And the Catholic Church is totally against the priests being married and yet the pope is supposed to be the spiritual desendent of Saint Peter, appointed 'head of the Apostles by Jesus saying, "You are the rock on which I will build my Father's Church", but after Jesus's death the Apostiles met in the house of Peter's mother-in-law? Religon always seems to have more questions than answers but it is faith and hope that helps as to go on.

Love ya,

Sally

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Guest Evalyn
Well, God made everything, right? And we (humans) have never ceased to screw with just about everything we touch. The food you're eating? It's the result of centuries of hybrids, breeding, and cloning. God NEVER made a seedless watermelon, yet I ate some for breakfast. (For that matter, God didn't make Granola, and I had some of THAT yesterday). You think for one minute God made rayon? Polyester? Wash-n-wear ANYTHING?

By the way, did you ride in an automobile today? Or any form of transportation that required refined fossil fuel?

I'm going to the dentist next week. By this logic, I should skip that, and just let God's little cavities take over my mouth.

Which begs the question... how 'bout dem vaccinations? Eh?

Anyone's Aunt Susie ever had a hip replacement? HUH?????

GGRRRRRRR..............................

So I'm going through the responses, trying to think of how to articulate myself...when I get to this one.

<3

You've made my day. And confused the hell out of my brother, who's trying to figure out why I'm giggling like mad.

Just for the sake of silliness, though: if you really want to flabbergast a faith-flouter, I'd suggest googling "Mackie" and "Problem of Evil."

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Guest mia 1

I am not not nor have ever been in the belief that their is perfection in anything other than mathematical formulas...God exists as we want her/him to exist in our imperfect minds and imaginations...sucumbing to the fact and worshiping a supreme deity is fine and wonderful but our small human brains match our small human, soon to be discarded bodies into the trash bin of history..Enjoy life enjoy yourself and transition into the realm of gender transitioning as far as you feel comfortable to do..

I suggest people re read Greek/roman, Norse and Persian mythology again and get confirmation on gender transitioning from their POV. It is an accepted and honored action..... We should all be proud of who we are and who we are becoming,,,we are a beautiful community and don't need confirmation from a higher spiritual source to proceed...

Just my thoughts and am showing no disrespect for others beliefs... Love to you all....Mia

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Guest S. Chrissie
Let me start my saying the POINT of the topic was WHAT DO YOU SAY when someone says "Why are you not happy as God made you?".

I did casually asked what a Christian friend of mine think about "legalizing SRS". (It's a controversial issue here) Her reply was that it should be illegalize because "God made you this way, God has plans for your". Which made me realise how humans tend to focus on the tangible, the seable, the touchable aspect of Life. Your physical body, the parts you have are tangible, so therefore, it is absolute. Your mind, your viewpoints, your ideas cannot be seen, only heard through your words. Therefore, it is not absolute, and can be molded, what your brain is is irrelevant, your brain must fit the body. That's what I learnt from her reply. :mellow:

Anyway, in the past, my argument or reply to the question would be

"So does that mean that God prefers us to change our mind and soul to fit the temporary vessel that is our body, instead of retaining our mind and soul but repair the vessel to fit our soul? I don't think God would focus more on the worldy aspect of you instead of your soul and your convictions."

Yeah, it's not a really smart argument..... :huh:

But as time goes by, I realised a lot and Christy Dancer couldn't have put it any better :D My new answer would probably be:

"Because this is God's Will and Grace that made me this way. Why do medical breakthroughs and treatments exists if not to correct defects? God made me question myself, question the society, so that I can find MYSELF in this world."

Perhaps, it's God's way of telling us to not get too comfy with the perceived norms of the world which humans take for granted?

Sherlyn :rolleyes:

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Guest Sarinah

This was the first question i recieved upon coming out to my parents, and it is one they continue to ask. I cannot seem to find the right words to explain why. In my own heart I know that since I put God in charge of my life he has been leading me to this point. I was born the way I am, with a gap between my body and soul. When I let God into my life he took away the anger, saddness, and he soothed the pain caused by the gap; but the gap remains. God has the power to fix the gap with a snap of his fingers, but I have come to believe that his plan is to guide me as we fix the gap together slowly but surely through my life.

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Guest S. Chrissie

Something our pastor has been saying for the past 2 weeks, and also in today's service:

"Our bad start in Life is God's opportunity for an extraordinary ending"

The topic he was talking about for these few weeks were "One Life, Make It Count"

He gave the example of the life of Moses. His life was a great one, he was the leader of the Isrealites, the guy who received the Ten Commandments. But in his early life, he had a bad life, after killing an Egyptian, he was a fugitive from the Egyptian. Then, we was a shepard for years before he encounter God and you know what happened after.

Come to think of it, isn't our Life the same? Having to face the turmoils of the ever existing gap between our body and soul, for some, a few years, for others, a very loooong time...until they get married, they raised their children and so on. I do believe that this bad start in life (Well, most of us would probably agree that it isn't a a good experience, right?) gives God the chance to work in us when we encounter God. I do see quite a number of us, who are gender gifted, are still followers of Christ, despite how most churches view us. That just shows how our faith stays strong, and you might have touched many people's life without even knowing it, or will be touching and changing the lives of people in the future.

okay, sorry, it seems I am talking about a topic irrelevant to the thread :P

What I want to point out is what was said:

"Our bad start in Life is God's opportunity for an extraordinary ending"

Sherlyn :rolleyes:

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Guest Elizabeth K
This was the first question i recieved upon coming out to my parents, and it is one they continue to ask. I cannot seem to find the right words to explain why. In my own heart I know that since I put God in charge of my life he has been leading me to this point. I was born the way I am, with a gap between my body and soul. When I let God into my life he took away the anger, saddness, and he soothed the pain caused by the gap; but the gap remains. God has the power to fix the gap with a snap of his fingers, but I have come to believe that his plan is to guide me as we fix the gap together slowly but surely through my life.

WOW - such a powerful reply - it seems to answer so many questions!

Lizzy

ADDED:

"Our bad start in Life is God's opportunity for an extraordinary ending"

Your posting came in as I was responding to Sarinah - and this - combined with what she said

"I have come to believe that His plan is to guide me as we fix the gap together slowly but surely through my life"

says the 'something' I was looking for when I started the TOPIC.

We are an amazing group of people here at Laura's. I am speachless...

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Guest Evan_J
I was asked this question by a family member and still get "so are you feeling any better because of doing this or will you accept that god made you this way?"

Online I'm wordy, in real life I say nothing. I look at them and either leave or change the subject. I refuse to be bullied into a conversation that makes me uncomfortable. They just brought it up because they make ideals into something selfish and hateful and think their being helpful and insightful.

I have often been called the strong and silent type. It drives my family crazy because I wont be persuaded into anything.

<--- Is also called cold and heartless in real life. Which isn't true but I guess I just rub people the wrong way. :P

You know, you're soundin more and more like my kinda guy lol puttin your name on the "cigar crew" list. For some reason "not taking your crap" has a way of getting labeled "cold and heartless".

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Guest StrandedOutThere
I always remind myself that the Bible was mostly written by people years later with a few exceptions. And all of the books have been reviewed and revised by various councils as well as having bee traslated so many times - each translationcauses different problems. It doesn't sit well with a lot of Christians but I ama Christian by belief and by deeds so I can not judge anyone else and I don't think that I really need to listen to those who want to condem me. Jesus even spared an adulteress - the "let he amoung you who is without sin caste the first stone." story and that is forbidden in the Ten Commandments - his point is that we are not the judges, he also forgave the robbers that were crusified with him - I can't believe that we are just supposed to do nothing, that is why we have brains in the first place, whether in the right or wrong body.

And the Catholic Church is totally against the priests being married and yet the pope is supposed to be the spiritual desendent of Saint Peter, appointed 'head of the Apostles by Jesus saying, "You are the rock on which I will build my Father's Church", but after Jesus's death the Apostiles met in the house of Peter's mother-in-law? Religon always seems to have more questions than answers but it is faith and hope that helps as to go on.

Love ya,

Sally

Good point, Sally. I guess we can't really know what any of it actually says. Translating something multiple times often does end up changing the meaning in subtle but significant ways.

One of the things I am really gritting my teeth about is being out on places like Facebook. I have a lot of friends on there that went to middle school with me at a Christian school. A lot of them are very religious and are not fans of GLBT people. In one case someone from high school sent me a message because I had posted some stuff defending gay marriage. After making some very reasonable, polite responses to the points she'd made, I told her I was trans. She never messaged me back. Anyway, I'm expecting some of those anti-homosexuality verses to get tossed my way from other people once I'm officially out.

My mom's spared me any religious based attacks so far. I'm hoping it stays that way. There really is good scientific evidence that gender identity and sexual orientation are determined before birth. By that reasoning, transition is just as acceptable as fixing a cleft palate or taking insulin shots for diabetes.

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Guest CharlieRose

This is a really good topic, with really neat responses.

I suppose I would make the points that God DID make me like this, bring up those studies about H-Y antigens being found in FTMs and that transsexual gene marker for MTFs if I needed to. I would also point out that unless they're a Christian Scientist, their argument's hypocritical, because this is a form of medicine for me. And also remind them that they're not God. They don't know what plans he has for me. They also aren't me. They don't know what I've been through. They don't know what I've said to God or what he's said to me. (Well, I don't really believe in literally *talking* to God, but I'll accept little signs and omens)

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  • 1 month later...
Guest rayne1
Let me start my saying the POINT of the topic was WHAT DO YOU SAY when someone says "Why are you not happy as God made you?".

I personally believe in a Creator, which is God the Father, Goddess the Mother, and the unknowable GODHEAD. I term the Creator 'GOD' in my postings to keep from getting into controversy. I am a combination Methodist-Wiccan-Catholic. My soul is a piece of GOD, so I am DEVINE in the sense of being a part of CREATION.

My reply would be:

GOD made me transsexual. I have studied my entire life to find a meaning in that and am still questioning why. BUT I personally asked GOD for resolution and he has led me to transition. To deny my right to transition is to deny GOD's will.

And it happened that way - a DEVINE introvention of supernatural nature I can never reveal because there are no words. And it involved me speaking directly with the Creator.

The intent for the posting? What kind of power is everyone using against the prejudice? What is everyone using for resolving the battle with that insane question, why aren't you happy as God made you? An I don't know if it is a Christian thing or not, but so often the Bible is quoted by those speakers. Their intent is to condemn us. I also feel strongly it makes them feel morally superior. It's horrible how a person THINKS he is Christian and yet can deny Jesus's commands to love others.

I tried that logic with my pastor that God made me a transsexual, but he doesn't see why I would want to change my body to female and that I should remain as a male no matter what and I will eventually get my thinking straight and be a perfect saint waiting for the Lord to return. The last part I can agree on perfecting the character spiritually. I told him what if God had created me a morfidite (part male and part female) Then he would concede that I could have a choice to go either way but not if I had the mind of female and the body of a male could I be allowed to change.

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    • Sally Stone
      Post 6 “The Military Career Years” In 1977 I joined the Army and went to flight school to become a helicopter pilot.  To fly for the military had been a childhood dream and when the opportunity arose, I took advantage of it, despite knowing I would have to carefully control my crossdressing activity.  At the time, military aviation was male dominated and a haven for Type A personalities and excessive testosterone.  I had always been competitive but my personality was not typically Type A.  And while I could never be considered effeminate, I wasn’t overtly masculine either.  Consequently, I had little trouble hiding the part of my personality that leaned towards the feminine side.    However, serving in the Army limited my opportunities for feminine self-expression.  During this period, I learned that being unable to express my feminine nature regularly, led to frustration and unhappiness.  I managed these feelings by crossdressing and underdressing whenever I could.  Underdressing has never been very fulfilling for me, but while I was in the Army it was a coping mechanism.  I only cross-dressed in private and occasionally my wife would take me out for a late-night drive.  Those drives were still quite private, but being out of the house was clearly therapeutic.    I told myself I was coping, but when it became apparent the Army was going to be a career, the occasional and closeted feminine expression was clearly inadequate.  I needed more girl time and I wanted to share my feminine side with the rest of the world, so the frustration and unhappiness grew.  Despite my feelings regarding feminine self-expression, I loved flying, so I wasn’t willing to give up my military career.  Consequently, I resigned myself to the fact that the female half of my personality needed to take a back seat, and what helped me through, was dreaming of military retirement, and finally having the ability to let Sally blossom.   About Sally. Ironically, she was born while I was still serving.  It was Halloween and my wife and I were hosting a unit party.  I looked upon the occasion as the perfect excuse to dress like a girl.  After a little trepidation, my wife agreed I should take advantage of the opportunity.  Back then, my transformations were not very good, but with my wife’s help, my Halloween costume looked quite authentic.  Originally, my wife suggested that my presentation should be caricature to prevent anyone from seeing through my costume.  But that didn’t appeal to me at all.  I wanted to look as feminine and ladylike as I could.   To my wife’s and my amazement, my costume was the hit of the party.  In fact, later in the evening, my unit buddies decided they wanted to take me out drinking and before either me or my wife could protest, I was whisked away and taken to one of our favorite watering holes.  Terrified at first, I had an amazing time, we all did.  But on Monday morning, when I came to work, I learned that I had a new nickname; it was Sally, and for the duration of that tour, that’s what I was called.  Well, when it came time for me to choose a feminine name, there weren’t any other choices.  Sally it was, and to this day I adore the name, and thank my pilot buddies for choosing it.   And this brings me to my last assignment before retiring.  I was teaching military science in an Army ROTC program at Mercer University in Macon, Georgia.  I had been a member of TRIESS (a nationwide crossdressing support group).  I wasn’t really an active participant but when we moved to Georgia, I learned there was a local chapter in Atlanta.  I reached out to the membership chair person, and joined.   Because the chapter meetings took place in Atlanta, a trans friendly city, and because Atlanta was so far from Macon and any of my military connections, I felt it would be safe to let my feminine hair down.  The monthly meetings took place in the Westin Hotel and Conference Center in Buckhead, an upscale northern Atlanta suburb, and the hotel itself was 4-star.  The meetings were weekend affairs with lots of great activities that allowed me to express myself in a public setting for the first time.  It was during this time, that Sally began to blossom.   I have the fondest memories of Sigma Epsilon (the name of our chapter in Atlanta).  Because the hotel was also a conference center, there was always some big event, and in many cases, there were several.  One weekend there was a nail technician conference that culminated in a contest on Saturday evening.  When the organizers learned there was a huge group of crossdressers staying at the hotel, they reached out to us looking for manicure volunteers.  I volunteered and got a beautiful set of long red fingernails that I wore for the duration of the weekend.   During another of our meeting weekends, there was a huge military wedding taking place, and imagine what we were all thinking when we learned it was a Marine wedding.  Our entire group was on edge worrying we might have to keep a low profile.  It turned out to be one of the most memorable weekends I would experience there.  First off, the Marines were all perfect gentlemen.  On Friday night and throughout the day on Saturday before the wedding, we rubbed elbows with most of them and their wives in and around the hotel, and at the hotel bar.  In fact, we got along so well the bride invited us to the reception.  Somewhere, there is a picture of me with a handsomely dressed Marine draped on each of my arms, standing in the lobby of the hotel.  Sadly, I never got a copy of it because the woman who took the picture used a film camera (yes, they actually took picture that way in ancient times).    My two-years with Sigma Epsilon was the perfect transition.  I went from being fully closeted to being mostly out.  I enhanced my feminine presentation and significantly reduced my social anxiety.  It also signified the end of one life and the beginning of another.  I had a great career and never regretted serving, but I was ready to shed the restrictions 20-years of Army service had imposed on my feminine self-expression.  My new life, Sally’s life, was about to begin, and with it I would begin to fully spread a new set of wings, this time feminine wings.    Hugs, Sally
    • Sally Stone
      Ashley, for a very long time she clung to the term crossdresser, because for her it was less threatening.  Over the years, though, she has come to recognize and acknowledge that I have a strong feminine side.  And like me, she now has a much better understanding of where my transgender journey is going, so me being bigender, isn't the threat she might have perceived it as, years ago. 
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://apnews.com/article/title-ix-sexual-assault-transgender-sports-d0fc0ab7515de02b8e4403d0481dc1e7   The revised regulations don't touch on trans athletes; which I totally understand, as that's become a third rail issue and this is an election year.  But the other changes seem pretty sensible, and will obviously result in immediate right wing lawsuits.   Carolyn Marie
    • missyjo
      darling you have wonderful taste..I especially love the red dress n sneaker outfit   enjoy   missy
    • Carolyn Marie
      Very well said, @Abigail Genevieve, and very true.  Thank you.   Carolyn Marie
    • Susan R
      Trans Group Zoom Meeting Tomorrow!!   Trans Group Zoom Meeting Times: April 20, 2024 6:00 PM Pacific Time April 20, 2024 8:00 PM Central Time April 21, 2024 11:00 AM Australia/Melbourne   Message me for the meeting link if you’d like to attend.   *Hugs* Susan R🌷
    • Susan R
      They may win a few battles but not the war! as @Davie pointed out there is little truth if it full of lies, inconsistencies, and ignores evidence to the contrary. I saw this article earlier and have to agree here. Truth will win. This isn’t the first time this tactic has been tried. Always stick with the truth!
    • Susan R
      Welcome @violet r! Glad you joined our forum and got through the hardest part…that first post. As many have mentioned, we are more than accepting here as we affirm your gender identity and hold no judgement, whatsoever. There’s so much here on this forum, I think you’ll find very helpful. If you have trouble finding an answer just reach out, try the search but starting a new thread is usually best to get some quick answers. Many are here for various transgender related issues but many, if not all, are here to help one another if we can. It’s great to have you onboard.   Warmest Regards, Susan R🌷
    • Willow
      good evening   good day at work today.  I did do some things a little out of normal but everything was completed successfully.  As I said earlier, the Asst Mgr was my second today.  I don’t think she was too happy about that.  Several customers asked her where Richard was her answer was the manager cut his hours.  Well that is only part of the story,  his hours were cut just like mine were and several others but in his case he made demands about his hours that couldn’t be met.  But instead of making some non complaining remark about it she made sure to lay it all on the manager, thus throwing the manager under the bus.  Similarly when asked why she hadn’t been at work early mornings, she said she was being punished by the manager.  Well that’s partly true, she wouldn’t do what the manager told her to do so she took her off opening.  But secondarily she didn’t have a car to drive temporarily.  You can’t open the store without a car because who ever opens has tasks that require them to leave the store, so it was  at least partly her own fault.  But she chose to throw the manager under the bus for that.  I think she is asking to be fired for insubordination.  And if the manager gets these conversations off the security tape tomorrow she just might get her wish.   im pretty close to being ready to take the asst position but there isn’t anyone ready to take over my job, at least not at our store.  I suppose the other shift lead could if she is able to work earlier shifts and if the other closers were just a bit more reliable.   Ive been wanting some homefried chicken.  We found a BBQ place not far away that had such a chicken but I is made fresh when ordered so it has a 30 minute wait.  It was worth the wait and the other things we tried were also good.  Another restaurant on the list.  At least half of what we ordered came home for another meal.   i get to sleep in tomorrow, I go to work at 1:30!   Willow
    • Abigail Genevieve
      It was nine thirty.  Saturday morning had rolled around more quickly than Taylor could believe.  She groaned, whined, thought of a million excuses why she should just stay in bed and knock the alarm across the room.  But it would still be going on, and so would the promise to Bob: when the gi came in, she would be in. There it was in its nice package, out where she could not miss it.  Why didn't she hide it?  She shook her head.   Up she got.  Sometimes you just do.  Her hair was a wreck. She patted it down and went to the bathroom.  Nine forty five. Shower later. No make up. She hated kara-tay especially at an ungodly early hour on a Saturday morning. Bagel. Instant coffee.  She was five minutes away when she realized she had forgotten the gi.  Back she went.   Into the dojo.  She had about five minutes to get the gi on.  She attempted to slip in unnoticed and go to the little restroom. Someone barked something out in Japanese or something, and there was a dead silence.  She turned to see what was going on. Both classes were getting into their lines, but everyone, including Bob, was bowing slightly. To her. Bob nodded, and she returned the bow.  Life started again. She was touched.   Bowing three times. Oath. Kata.  She was facing off with Judy as her partner.  Judy looked worried.   "Sometimes you just gotta pick yourself up and try again," Taylor told her. She nodded. "Let's do this."   Lunge punch and lower block.  They traded off like nothing had happened the last weekend.  Lunge punch and middle block. Lunge punch and upper block.  It was kind of like dancing. Taylor enjoyed it.  She wanted to learn more.  Brown-belt Maggie adjusted position of limbs and hips for both Taylor and Judy, telling them when she was about to do something: elbow up a bit".    "How'd you do?" Bob asked her later.  They had both gone home and showered. Now they were in a booth at a fast food place.   "I was kind of disappointed class ended. I was ready for more."   "That's my trooper."   "I'm not allowing you in my apartment until we are married," she said suddenly.   "You think I am a problem?"   "No.  I think you are safe. You passed the test  I am the problem here."   "Okay."   "What did the doctor tell you?"   "It's complicated.  More tests coming.  Like getting into college.  I got a letter back.  It seems there is this big fat M on my transcript and my current picture is not an M type picture.  I have to write a letter and send them notarized proofs and stuff. Just delays. This is a pain. Nothing cut and dried."   "I will say.  I'm glad I'm not transgender."   "Hah. You are pulled into my world.  You are involved in this stuff as much as I am, and, as you put it, of your own free will."   "You are worth it."   "I hope so."   "I know so."      
    • Abigail Genevieve
      On the way back to her desk she was interrupted by six short, urgent conversations that had to be attended to. Then she slipped into the women's room and locked the stall door.  She took a deep breath, then another, and allowed herself to shake for five minutes,  Then deep breathing, ten in and ten out, stretch up, touch the floor, neck rolls and she was fine. She used the toilet and a woman knocked and said, "Taylor, are you okay?"   "Ready to conquer the world!"  on her way out she found her makeup was fine.  Three stalls, two sinks.  If she ever designed a women's room with three stalls, there would be four sinks, with plenty of space to plunk your stuff down between them.   She met a deferential Karen.  "Here is the branding I came up with," she said.  And she went back to working as hard as Brenda and Mary, who looked up worriedly and then went back to the proposal.   Shortly before 5:00 she received an email with the title Consolidation and Compensation.  In it she learned that the position of office manager was eliminated, and the current office manager was to become the chief executive officer. The former CEO, along with the CFO, the chief legal officer, and sundry staff, had been terminated, per the Board of Directors.  Effective immediately everyone would receive a base salary of $20,000 with a commission to be set by the individual's supervisor.  Each supervisor would be given a certain percentage to distribute.  Most functions they had been handled would be outsourced as needed.   "The question of what profit was made last year is frequent enough to be answered.  The company lost over 500,000 in fiscal 2023.  At this point further cuts are not anticipated.  We will be strategically adding positions that will enhance our profits. Hard work is expected of everyone."   Her two web guys had been complaining because their games had been remotely uninstalled.  After the memo came out they were absolutely silent.  That gave her an idea, and after an exchange of emails they were reassigned to maintenance out at the plant, effective tomorrow morning.  There were lots of weeds that needed pulling, if nothing else. That email went out after they left early, for the day.  The maintenance foreman was a no-nonsense type who did not tolerate slacking, and they would learn a thing or two.  This also freed up two spaces for her to put new people.
    • MaeBe
      So…I didn’t know your Facebook avatar was public. So, on my birthday, a couple people used a group avatar message to wish me a happy birthday…and now my Facebook friends can see a short video of my female avatar dancing with an old friend’s and another with my uncle’s avatars. So am I “Facebook out” now? 😬
    • Davie
      No, they are not. Truth wins in the end and this report is full of lies that poison the whole thing: see this: "Dr. Cass Backpedals From Review: HRT, Blockers Should Be Made Available it's said. Dr. Cass's latest statements are likely to cast more doubt on the validity of the study, which has come under fire for disregarding substantial evidence on trans care." https://www.erininthemorning.com/p/dr-cass-backpedals-from-review-hrt?publication_id=994764&post_id=143743897&isFreemail=true&r=rebf4&triedRedirect=true I hope Dr. Cass wins The Mengele Award for it.
    • Adrianna Danielle
      Boyfriend and I went to a support group for spouses dating or married to a transgender person on Tuesday night for the first time.It was amazing meeting other couples like us.One was a genetic woman whom has been dating a transgender male for the first time and she is supporting his transition.Us,they were amazed by us agreeing on something we said,love and acceptance have brought us together
    • Abigail Genevieve
      By which I mean there is a cultural stereotype of what a man is, and one of what a woman is.  Even worse, of what a transgender person is.   You be you.   I read of a boy who thought he was a girl because he did not adhere to some (rather toxic) conceptions of what it means to be a man, so he decided he was a girl.  He was told he didn't have to conform to stereotype and got happy. "You mean I don't have to transition?" He didn't want to, and was relieved.   Once upon a time if you were transgender they told you either you transition or die.   Incorporate the best of what it means to be a man and the best of what it means to be a woman as much as you possibly can, and let the rest go.  Be fully human. Be alive. Don't conform to some cultural crud.
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