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Guest Charlotte J.

Joy Harjo performing "I Give You Back"

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Guest Charlotte J.

A lot of trans* folk deal with fear, depression, loneliness, anger, and a host of other negative emotions. I find this poem by Joy Harjo particularly moving, empowering, beautiful. I hope that others may find it so, too, and that it might give some strength.

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      I forgot to mention , the regret I have for not speaking up a long time ago. At dinner at a Hometown Buffet dinner with my kids and dad, for Father’s Day, my dad made some some comment about gay people, and I didn’t say anything. My kids and I just stopped and stared at each other. I felt bad cause my daughter, who came out to me and her mom, looked at me, and I didn’t say anything at the time. I still feel bad , cause I should have  stuck up for my daughter, and immediately corrected him. Needless to say, the Father’s Day dinners with my dad and my kids became scarce, cause of what was said and not corrected. By not saying anything, it enables others to continue the hate. The haters continue to oppress and the cycle is not broken.  A couple of months ago my dad asked if my daughter was dating anyone, and I told him yes, a girlfriend of hers, but I don’t think it clicked. He is not both hard of hearing and he is on the verge of dementia, or he is just plain old, old. I’ll make sure he understands when the next opportunity arises. I’m tired of of people like this going on yapping crap and not correcting them. Their loss.  
    • Ellora
      My mom and dad didn’t go to my wedding because I didn’t finish college first. That set the tone for the rest of of my marriage , with my (ex)wife and kids. They had some regrets later, but it sucks when family isn’t a part of our life choices. My parents are old old now, so there wouldn’t be much of a discussion about who I am now, nor if and when they find out their granddaughter is a lesbian. If they do feel compelled to say any derogatory about the LGBTQ community, I would probably shut  the comments down with an ultimatum,  that would inform them they have the choice to accept all on my family and friends that may or may not be LGBTQ, or we would not be in contact until they do so. I am at the point in life where I choose not to fall into the oppressive actions of hateful people. I know everyone’s life isn’t there yet, and I hope someday people don’t have to feel threatened by these hateful people.  Best of luck with your journey.
    • Kamarka
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    • Ellora
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