Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

MarcieMarie12

The Marcie Chronicles

Recommended Posts

MarcieMarie12

I had my first outing as me tonight. It was somewhat anti-climatic though. I didn't get hasseled by the Westboro baptist church of their wannabees, I did not get clocked (as far as I can tell). JUst had a nice dinner with a friend and talked about all sorts of stuff. Thanks for being there for me Courtney! I'm not sure I would have gotten over my worries to do this without you!

How did it feel? I wasn't scared, maybe a little worried about my appearance but Courtney helped calm my nerves. I did learn why pencil skirts aren't a good fit for my body, made it work with a black shawl though. We also got a complimented by the server! Said we were a pair of lovely ladies!

Did I feel out of place?--No.

Did it feel wrong or right?--Definitely not wrong....did it feel right, yes.

Will Marcie escape the house again? Yes.

Does she understand more about herself after tonight? Yes.

Will I ever forget this night? No.

Edited by Charlize
Title changed by author's request

Share this post


Link to post
Carolyn Marie

That's really great, Marcie, and I am happy for you. You should be very proud of yourself for your accomplishment. That first time out is no small thing, and I think its safe to say that none of us every forget that first time. Five years or more later and I remember every detail.

I hope every time out is just as much fun and just as big a success. Soon enough, they will become routine.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

Share this post


Link to post
Guest

I can't stop smiling for you Marcie. That is so wonderful. Way hug. JodyAnn

Share this post


Link to post
Guest

Congrats Marcie!

That was great that you had company.

My first few outings were solo and it was easy for me to bail out if I wanted to by simply not getting out of the car... Yup. It took me a while of thinking and then re-thinking what i was doing and why.

And then I did it and my life has never been the same since.

A long journey starts with a single step.

And you will always remember your first.

Share this post


Link to post
Charlize

Thanks for the Sunday morning warmth and smile. You are on a great journey towards a place you've always had within. Yourself. It feels so good to find her and have the ability to let her out of the closet.

Hugs,

Charlize

Share this post


Link to post
tracy_j

Congratulations Marcie :)

I'm really pleased things went well!

Many more good times to come

Tracy x

Share this post


Link to post
MarcieMarie12

Thanks, I can't wait to be me again!

Share this post


Link to post
StephanieVikingGirl

Congrats Marcie!,

This is huge, and I am so happy it went well for you. I remember so clearly my first time out, I waited until Halloween, and then went shopping at three stores by myself, as myself. I figured it was Halloween, and if I didn't pass, folks would think that I was in costume. Kinda scary, but like you, it went fine, I blended in as a woman, no problem. I went full time a few weeks later. :) YMMV.

hugs,

Stephanie

Share this post


Link to post
Guest Kayla Grace

I wish I could add more ... But I really only have one thing to say ...

:)

Share this post


Link to post
MarcieMarie12

Thanks Kayla and Stephanie!

Hugs--Marcie

Share this post


Link to post
MarcieMarie12

Went out as Marcie last night. tried to get a pedicure butthe place was closed by the time I gotthere. Then I went to target. Was a bit more nervous being just myself, got some odd looks from maybe 3-4 people. I think being nervous was more of the issue than my appearance, but then again something might have been off.....

Anyway, my spouse was not to happy that have been out twice. She's worried what the neighbors will think and isn't ready to explain it to them. She wants me to stop going out in a dress....

Share this post


Link to post
MarcieMarie12

PS: Wife still doesn't even want to see me dressed and it has been 4 months since I told her. I can see why some of us just surprise them at some point.....

Share this post


Link to post
Guest

It's coming to trench coat weather. Giggle. Slip the pants and shoes off in the car. I did it for months to save changing at my LGBT AA meetings. I only had to put my wig on later. Hope this helps?

Share this post


Link to post
MarcieMarie12

Marcie got out loose on the world again yesterday. Being out felt so normal to me. Going to a thrift store with Courtney, looking at clothes (nothing good sadly :( ), going to starbucks and talking shop (we both are in related fields), and outfits. I even got spontaneously mam'd by the cashier when by myself in the grocery store.

The only downside I see is that when I'm not able to be Marcie, my dysphoria is getting worse and my desire to stay as Marcie (myself) has gotten stronger. I basically spent almost the entire weekend as myself. I didn't want it to end....

Share this post


Link to post
MarcieMarie12

Ok, I am up to being out six times as me! The fourth time out I went to my GT. The fifth and sixth were both the same day (last Saturday). The fifth was a trip to Panera (mam'd) and the grocery store (mam'd again). Then in the evening went out with Courtney and a pair of other ladies for dinner. It was fun to get out. I know at some point I'll probably stop tracking this, that will be another milestone in someways.

The downside to this is going back to male mode is getting harder and harder.

Share this post


Link to post
Guest Opal

Nice to hear that your outings have been going well. :)

Others who have trouble reverting to male mode have things like adding a bit of color or bling to

their appearance, I have even gotten away with clearcoat on my nails for a day.

One can also try a gradual shift towards more unisex clothing.

Huggs,

Opal

Share this post


Link to post
Guest Mickey

And under dressing did wonders for me for about 5+ years before I went full time. Panties, stockings or other hosiery works wonders for warmth in the colder months. But always panties at the bare minimum, for years, kept me from going insane I think. It is such a relief, to be full time now.

Share this post


Link to post
Guest Sarah1967

Congrats Marcie :) glad you had a nice time. :thumbsup:

Share this post


Link to post
MarcieMarie12

And under dressing did wonders for me for about 5+ years before I went full time. Panties, stockings or other hosiery works wonders for warmth in the colder months. But always panties at the bare minimum, for years, kept me from going insane I think. It is such a relief, to be full time now.

Yeah, I started doing that in September. It helps sometimes, as does having my toenails painted. It is what I can get away with at work.

Share this post


Link to post
MarcieMarie12

BTW--Spent a good 48 hours or more as me last weekend (longest I've ever stayed dressed and first time I had a change of wardrobe mid-day due to needing something more appropriate--i.e. getting dressed for dinner with the girls).

I still didn't want to stop being me, but wife was coming home. I'm keeping myself from getting frustrated with her by saying I am frustrated with the "situation". But I think that without her objections I'd be me 100% of the time now except at work and when with family. I am working on coming out to them next.

Share this post


Link to post
Guest

Your stories are wonderful, they remind me of me! I need that for perspective, it wasn't that long ago for me, but now five years seems like twenty-five years of being me. You help reel me in, back to reality as I cheer you on.

Today I barely remember male, if I try to put on the clothes and assume that role I get physically sick. I played in that soap opera for far too long. Enjoy duality while you can, one day it will only be a fond memory. Hug. JodyAnn

Share this post


Link to post
MarcieMarie12

So as of today, I've been out 7 times as me. I went to the GT and had a good session (it was over coming out to my parents and after that others that I know should be easier--I hope...). Anyway got to the grocery store, a Mcdonald's (bad Marcie!!--Ok all I had for the day was some grapes and pear by they point--I'm trying to loose weight), a thrift store that I really like and its the size of a walmart and picked up a nice skirt--I actually tried it on in the store before I bought it--first time I tried on girl clothes, I never felt so vulnerable in my life. While walking around I got a few smile backs of other women, men not so much (they tend to avoid eye contact with women I guess). I didn't get any confused looks or harassed-so I guess I'm passing. Even the clerks I interacted with at close range didn't notice or seem to care.

Share this post


Link to post
MarcieMarie12

PS: Not really enjoying the duality, male mode feels like purgatory.....got home and wife was not there so I got to be me at home.

BTW-GIRL problems--when using the ladies room is it better to drop your skirt or hike it up? I hiked mine up in the ladies room (single stall), and had problems...things a GG probably figures out by the time they 6 or 7....

Share this post


Link to post
tracy_j

I hike it up but as I generally wear a short skirt I find it easy. Perhaps it is an idea to start short and progress to longer?

A bigger issue I find is to get panties and tights interleaved with vest and outer wear - ie the layered approach. Brilliant to keep warm in winter but I do double check the back of my skirt is not tucked in somewhere. This is a not unusual failing with cis women also. As I now often wear a coat as well it gets even more complicated. I cope Ok but as I am sorting things in the stall I do notice cis women can be in and out in moments :D . Hopefully speed comes in time lol.

Tracy

Share this post


Link to post
tracy_j

Oh I should say as well that I remember from when I was little (younger than 5 ie before gender became an issue), girls I new going out in the wild. They alwas 'hiked it up' and as little girls seldom wore long skirts they learned with a short skirt first as well. I put what I remembered to good use when on long walks as I have observed how to do it at the crouch. I have never though about how to cope with a long skirt. Just longer than knee length is as far as I've gone.

Tracy

Share this post


Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

  • Who's Online   10 Members, 0 Anonymous, 140 Guests (See full list)

    • Willa
    • Lucca
    • Michelle F
    • AnAnxiousMess
    • AdriannaB
    • Belle
    • JustineM
    • Susan R
    • Ronin82
    • Carolyn Marie
  • Topics With Zero Replies

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      69,746
    • Total Posts
      630,338
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      6,095
    • Most Online
      8,356

    IBrown
    Newest Member
    IBrown
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Callie40
      Callie40
      (45 years old)
  • Posts

    • Carolyn Marie
      https://www.jta.org/quick-reads/transgender-woman-gives-up-legal-fight-to-see-her-haredi-orthodox-children   This is a real shame, but I understand why the trans woman made her decision.  Shunning in such a close community would have ruined the lives of the children.  I think she made the right choice.   Carolyn Marie
    • Carolyn Marie
      Welcome to Trans Pulse, Michaela.  I love your spirit, and being mischievous is something I'm into, too.  I wish that all spouses were as supportive as yours, so give her a hug for us.  Please look around and have something to say, because we'll be here to read and listen.   HUGS   Carolyn Marie
    • Carolyn Marie
      Welcome to Trans Pulse, My Lung.  I think you may well be our first member from Vietnam, so that makes you extra special.  Please ask any questions you wish, and join in any of the conversations.  We will help as much as we can.  BTW, your English is excellent!   HUGS   Carolyn Marie
    • Carolyn Marie
      My goodness, that is one of the worst things I've heard @Laura76, and I've been here a long time.  So needlessly cruel and heartless.  Born-again Christian?  Christ would be appalled.  There is nothing Christian about what your family is doing to you.  I'm so sorry.  😢   HUGS   Carolyn Marie
    • Susan R
      Thanks @Jani  I just received a reply email from my ex in response to mine thanking her for driving all the way up here from her home to see my wife and I, and of course, for the nice vase of flowers she brought us.  She wrote that since her visit she has come up with more questions and will be compiling them and will ask at a future date..lol  It looks like she is really trying to learn and understand me though.  That’s more than I expected out of it but it was part of my intention of having her over for dinner.   Update: This just in....as soon as she unpacks she is now having us over to her new place.  So in probably a month, I’ll be back for more..lol   Susan R🌷
    • ShawnaLeigh
      This is terrible.  How can someone that is suppose to love you be so mean.  I’m sorry it is like that’s for you.  😢
    • Robin68
      ❤️ My Lung I was very timid here also and did not speak up for a time. I was like Shawnaleigh. I have learned this is a very safe place and you are very welcome here! Your English is excellent! I live in an area where many Vietnamese have settled in the United States. I look forward to reading more of your comments!   Hugs! ❤️   Robin
    • AdriannaB
      Came out today,going to be Adrianna in March.At 15 years old,I questioned myself if I was really female from the inside and knew the answer was yes.On my list of things to do was go further into my journey of being Adrianna more.So far came out at work,to my wife,mom and my 3 sisters.So far so good and I started seeing a therapist last month.Transitioning,decided not to go on the HRT and doing it surgically on March 6th.Having the body contouring surgery,ffs and breast augmentation done.My wife Nikki even came out too,said she has always liked me as Adrianna more and going to be there for support.So far I am excited about it and going to love the results.Next are my friends and other family members including my twin son and daughter tommorrow
    • AdriannaB
      Today was coming out more today and it was time.When I was 15,I questioned myself if I was really a woman from the inside and knew the answer was yes.So far good at work and even with my wife Nikki.My mom and 3 younger sisters,did take it good.I knew I wanted to go farther sometime later in my life.Did start seeing a therapist last month and decided to do this transition with no hormones,surgically.Even went to my first consultation today having a body contouring surgery,ffs and breast augmentation.Good news it's going to happen on March 2nd changing my life around in a good way.Nikki is going to be there for support,has always said she has liked me as Adrianna more.I turn 41 next month and want to see family and friends see me as male before I become Adrianna for good. 
    • Jani
      Greetings Mickey and welcome. That's nice that your wife understands happiness is most important.  Please join in.   Cheers, Jani
    • Charlize
      I was involved in an attempt to get a trans meeting going in New Hope PA a few years ago.  Unfortunately there were not enough folks in our area, and while some drove a long distance to attend at times it was only one or two of us too often. You are certainly in an area with a larger population and bigger trans community so hopefully that won't be a problem.    The TGAA meetings on Zoom are basically the same as any other meeting.  For a great many people it is the only place they can share about issues they face as trans folks.  we have a literature study program, a Big Book Study, a speaker discussion and a topic discussion meeting.    I have found that the Hazeldon publication "Glad Day", which is covering issues the GLBTQ community faces,  often brings on good discussions.   Hugs,   Charlize
    • Laura76
      When my grandchildren asked what name to call me, I asked them to suggest a nice name they could pick that wat they know it will always be unique to me.  They came up with "Maddie." Their born-again religious mother however told them immediately while I was present to never talk about me, or ask me about transitioning my gender.  When my older sisters were told about my new nickname they said my grandchildren should be calling me, "Grandpa sicko," "Confused Grandpa," "Idiot Grandpa," or "Maddie is the insane Grandpa." (so much for sibling support....)  
    • Laura76
      Another story from products from China... I ordered a hoodie for my sister, it was too small. So I reordered a larger size from the same company, the item they sent said it was two sizes larger than the original size I ordered, but when we compared the two hoodies side by side, the first smaller one was larger than the replacment XXL size that we just ordered.  The larger size was was the first "Large" size, and was larger than the XXL size. As previously stated be VERY cautious when ordering from China, especially vendors that do not refund, or replace.
    • MetaLicious
      Thanks for the warm weIcome! While it's true that I aim to misbehave, I've read the rules and promise to keep my misbehaving elsewhere!
    • Laura76
      Early in my transition whenever anyone says anything about me and shaving, I would ask them if they are willing to shave my face each morning for me. Of course they wouldn't so, I would always respond with,  "you can do whatever you want with your face, let me decide what do to with mine."
  • Upcoming Events

×
×
  • Create New...