Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

The Marcie Chronicles


MarcieMarie12

Recommended Posts

Well, my "job search" turned into a why don't you start your own business search. I've been looking at starting my own business and doing research and talking to prospective partners. It is a lot of work!!! The group I am working with asked for permission to do a background check, so I had to out myself because of the name change. We will see what happens.....I do have a back up plan after this.

 

I am in the process of taking some classes at the moment and no one has any idea that I am trans. Yeah semi stealth mode!! That being said, me and the other 3 girls in the class of 9 went outside to a picnic table and talked during lunch. The 5 guys all went their separate ways, guys are weird......

 

I did run into trouble being semi-stealth. The subject of my name change came up after my divorce. They just assumed I talking about leaving my husband. (cis hetero normative people just assume everyone else is cis hetero normative I guess). I went along with it, I was not in the mood to explain to them that I was trans.  Felt great to be validated, but on the other hand I did not like the white lie.

 

I am at month 9 since my surgery, I am 97% healed. I still try to dilate twice a day, though for the second time I try to use something a little more fun. :) I do sometimes get some minor bleeding, but not often (1 a week, and usually when I don't get the second dilation in). 

 

Link to comment
  • 2 months later...
  • Replies 251
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • MarcieMarie12

    117

  • tracy_j

    34

  • Charlize

    24

  • Jani

    20

Top Posters In This Topic

Posted Images

Wow!  I looked back on some of those earlier pictures you posted.  Hard to believe we've all come so far in the last several years!  ?

Link to comment
  • 3 weeks later...

It is my official 1 year since surgery, my big takeaway is that dilation is not fun....but I have one more appointment with Dr. Rumer tomorrow. I find it hard to believe sometimes how far I have come. Transitioning has been one of the more challenging things I have ever done, but was so worth it. Non trans issues are more pressing (like finding work--might be trans related though as I always wonder if they see my name do a quick search and see AKA-Dead Name). But life goes on, and really not much gets me down these days. 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Congratulations Marcie!  

8 minutes ago, MarcieMarie12 said:

I find it hard to believe sometimes how far I have come.

Me as well!  

 

9 minutes ago, MarcieMarie12 said:

Transitioning has been one of the more challenging things I have ever done, but was so worth it. Non trans issues are more pressing

I totally agree but we were up to the challenge!  Yeah!  You know you've arrived at normalcy when life is about living and not a constant stream of trans issues.    

 

Cheers, Jani

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Congratulations Marcie on your milestone :)

 

Cyndi -

 

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

I like your updates Marcie. This thread was a good idea :)

 

Happy travels x

 

Tracy

Link to comment
18 hours ago, tracy_j said:

I like your updates Marcie. This thread was a good idea :)

 

Happy travels x

 

Tracy

 I'm glad and hope others find it valuable. I had a clean bill of health from the doctor!!! :)

Link to comment
  • 3 months later...

Well I have been working on my business, stressing about money and the lack of income for the past year and other non-trans issues since the last update. The real estate world is not for me (found that out within a week of working at a C21 office. I do not like canned conversations nor do I like cold calling.

 

So one the business front, I've moved on to looking at another franchise. This is a pest control franchise that is based in Chicago. I'll be buying into a territory in the DC area though. I plan to be open this spring!! I also am getting a van and equipment, very exciting. But of course I am hoping the business does get off the ground as quickly as I would like. I don't think they know I am trans, but a if they did any sort background check, it probably showed my dead name as an aka. All I know is that I have not mentioned it nor have they mentioned it. . 

 

Anyway, so beyond building my business empire I've been enjoying life with my girlfriend, meeting with my dad for lunch. Sadly not much interaction with my brothers and I found out why. But basically it involved my brothers claiming that they will put up with my presence so long as I don't bring my girlfriend....I declined to attend either as my girlfriend has no one else in the area. Here is the letter I wrote to them:. 

 

"

Dear XXX and XXX,

So last Saturday, I spoke with Dad I was informed that my girlfriend of 2 years is not welcome to join us for Thanksgiving and this would be the same for Christmas. Not because he did not wish it, but because some of the nephews have issues. Honestly, I don’t buy it,… and even if my nephews “had issues”,  I would hope that my brothers would be adults in dealing with their children, rather than just giving into their unreasonable, and dare I wonder if they are transphobic demands. All this indicates to me is that there is just bare tolerance for my presence.

 

I had truly hoped that after a few years  things would get better. Although I barely hear from either of you beyond birthday and Christmas cards, I wrote it off as you are still adjusting or just being too busy with your own lives. But at this point I am not sure we can have a relationship at all. And really, what is the point? Putting conditions for my appearance at family events takes no consideration into how it affects me or my feelings.

 

Am I to be treated by family as a pariah, some criminal on parole to have limits place on me just because I am LGBT? According to what I have experienced, that seems to be the case. Frankly, I can’t and won’t accept that. If I was not transgender would we be having this conversation about me bringing home my girlfriend? I highly doubt we would.

 

So, sorry and please don’t worry; I won’t be at Thanksgiving or Christmas this year.  You can have your holidays free from the inconvenience of me. 

 

 

It was sent before Thanksgiving, and beyond my Dad (who I CC'd on the e-mail, telling me that they read it, neither have responded.  I do wonder if it is wrong to not send Christmas or birthday cards to either brothers family anymore. I am fully frustrated with them at this point that I no longer care beyond it making me look bad.

 

 

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

I think the type of personality needed for RE sales is unique, for the reasons you state.  Good luck in your new venture!  I'm sure it will take off.  

 

I'm sorry you had to write that letter.  As to continuing sending cards, you don't say you're writing them off completely so sending pleasantries isn't a bad idea, especially as they send cards to you.  It will be telling if they don't continue.  I've always been a proponent of not doing things I don't enjoy so quietly pulling away sounds like a solid option, although how would your dad feel about this as it exposes a rift in the family?  

 

Jani  

Link to comment

I think  my dad is trying to keep the peace. But what he fails to understand is how deeply this hurts. He said to try to see it from their point of view. However the only point of view I see that would warrant such a response is that either my brothers are transphobic, homophobic or one or more of my nephews are (which I highly doubt). Otherwise by this point, they would  have reached out to me in some fashion to talk about it. Instead it was just talking about the weather and happy birthday or merry Christmas. They never asked about the trans issues or discussed it with me.  . 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Wow this bites Marcie,

 

First, best of luck with your new business venture !

 

As for the family issues, sigh, do I dare generalize after reading this, that's it's a "man thing" in play, sorry.

 

From the male point of view, It's culturally difficult, especially when fathers are trying to "socialize" sons, the message is NO girlishness ever. How could the little ones see just how happy you are ?

 

Someday I hope all of this just fades away (long beyond my years).

 

Best

 

C -

Link to comment

I just feel sorry for my dad. He saw his family disentegrate due to various events over the past few years. I had luch with him today, and he said that they never hear from me either. But that (and I didn't debate the point) is not true. I havecalled, I have stopped by a couple of times at my brothers house. In the end I told dad not to get involved as the messenger. If they want to say something, they should talk to me directly. But other than that the talk went well all things concerned. Though my mom is not doing all that well.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

That was good that you cautioned your dad to not get involved in this sibling thing.  One way or another, it will work its way out.   Your mother is not doing well, I hope its not her health. 

 

Jani

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Marcie,

 

It's good to know that youa re progressing jobwise. I am not sure about pest control myself, although my judgement will probably be coloured by infestations, and from watching the Australian documentaries they show here with nasty things like Brown snakes, Funnel Webs and crocodiles ?

 

I hope things work out in the end with your family. People tend to react in different ways and, although they always seem to have a big reaction, it is not always predictable. On my side my brother and sister were very distant for a while, although not heavily negative. I just carried on as usual and they steadily accepted things (it too my brother a couple of years even to mention my hair colour). On my partners side they just laughed openly. It was just as bad, but they did get over it. Just reactions. Family are family though so it is a good idea to keep in contact, send cards etc. Personally I would keep it low key though and just let life's events push yours into the background.

 

I too hope your parents are both Ok

 

Tracy

Link to comment
  • 4 months later...

I am two days from doing my first treatments!!! :) I also realize I've been away for almost a month an a half. Lessons learned:

Taxes, government licensing, leasing, financing, marketing, training, customer management software and other details take a lot of my time. It has been very stressful, and having everything on the company web site only in mens sizes is a bit dysphoric for me too. But it would be frivolous for me to ask for women's sizes.  

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Marcie!  I've wondered how you were progressing.  It seems you're on the cusp of this adventure taking off.  Great!  I wish all the best.  I'm sure you've done all your homework and trained well.  

 

Can you alter the men's uniform to fit?  

 

Jani

Link to comment

Not really, thankfully they seem to be unisex. But it is aggravating. GIrls do not look great in things designed for men.

Link to comment
  • 4 months later...
  • Never did where that uniform. It just looked to crappy on me. I was swimming in it. I also ran into it setting off my dysphoria, so that was a bit unexpected. I am going to try to sell the business after this season though, I found other aspects very much not to my liking (sales and marketing are my least favorite things). In the end Ihave around 45 repeat customers and about 20 I just di one off.treat ments for (mostly through groupon). Once I am done with the busines I am thinking I will try either cyber security of teaching.  
Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Marcie. It's good to hear from you again. I am sure I am I am not the only one who thinks about you. Thank you for the update. Well you have given it a go. Hopefully in profit. Keep happy!

 

Tracy

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Good to see you Marcie.  I sounds like your making changes in your life.  Keep in touch.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hello Marcie, Glad to see your post.  I'm sorry the business didn't quite work out as you hoped but I suppose it was an experience to add to your list.  I've always heard Groupon sales were loss leaders since they take a good percentage off the take on top of the discount they recommend.   I hope you can sell quickly and that your new venture works out well.  

 

Cheers, Jani  

Link to comment

Hi Marcie, I have been distracted by life for quite some time now and hope to get back to reading and sharing again. I backtracked to when you had your surgery. I am glad that it went well. I am sorry about your brothers, hopefully they will come to accept you as the wonderful person you are. 

On 12/1/2018 at 6:49 AM, tracy_j said:

. Family are family though so it is a good idea to keep in contact, send cards etc.

I think this a good idea, even if you just send cards. this will let them know that you harbor no hard feelings toward them.

I hope that you find the right niche where your business opportunities lie. 

As I look back on my journey, I find that the advice and support you and others here has been invaluable. I remember feeling as if I had known all of you since i had been reading your posts for many months before registering here. Sorry about rambling, I know this is about your journey, not mine. Just had to let you know how much you have helped me in my journey.

 

Hugs,

Brandi

Link to comment
  • 1 year later...

Hi, been a while and thought I would give an update. After all was said and done my then girlfriend and I went to Arizona to visit her dad. We also met and had a nice lunch with my brother there.  We also met a friend (our hairdresser) in Tombstone. Got a cool cowboy hat that I love and it fits my big head.  In January I looked at the numbers and realized the business model I bought into was flawed as the territory was too small for the money they wanted me to spend on advertising. Basically in the end I closed my business.

 

After that I started substitute teaching more and more. I really enjoyed it until Covid shut the schools down. I then went back to school to get my teacher's license. That took me until December to complete the classwork.  

 

In May I got married to my then girlfriend. It was a small ceremony. But we are happy. In October we went to my Uncle's funeral and it was a bit wierd between myself and my brother. They ignored me for thr the most part and only interacted when were talking with my dad.  Not my issue, was polite but I am not seeking to maintain a relationship on their terms. If they want one they are the ones who will have to reach out now. 

 

 

As I said before most issues in my life are not trans related, and for the most part I am enjoying my life. It's not perfect, but expecting that is making onself unhappy in my opinion.

 

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   4 Members, 0 Anonymous, 116 Guests (See full list)

    • Abigail Genevieve
    • KathyLauren
    • SamC
    • April Marie
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.6k
    • Total Posts
      767.9k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,014
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Quillian
    Newest Member
    Quillian
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. l.demiurge
      l.demiurge
  • Posts

    • KathyLauren
      One of our cats is polydactyl.  He has 7 toes on each front paw and 5 on each back paw, for 24 toes total.   Another one, an ex-feral who, at the time, was free to roam, climbed 50 feet up a tree without having any thought about how he was going to get down.  His pal climed down backwards, but he couldn't.  He ended up coming down by leaping from branch to branch.  Which nearly gave us heart attacks, because he only has one eye and therefore has no depth perception.   The other ex-feral (both are now indoor cats) obviously does not have those soft pads on his feet.  At night, when we are in bed, we can hear him stomping around the house.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      The two o'clock Onshoring meeting was going well.  Taylor was leading, inviting other people up to speak on their specialties. Aerial photogrammetry and surveying, including the exact boundary, were out for contract signature  Gibson had handled that - Manufacturing was supposed to, but somehow hadn't happened.  Legal issues from Legal. Accounting reported on current costs, including all upkeep, guard salaries, etc.  Manufacturing was supposed to give those numbers, but they hadn't.   The downside was the VP of Manufacturing.  He had arrived at the meeting red-faced, his tie askew, clutching a bottle. It smelled strongly of vodka. He had never done anything in his twenty years of being VP of Manufacturing, and he did not like being asked now.   "Mr. ----, do you have the inventory we asked for?" Taylor asked politely.  VP Gibson had asked him to have his people go through the plant and not only inventory but assess the operational status of every piece of equipment.  They needed to know what they had. "I'm not going to take any f---- orders from a g-d- tra---," he snarled. "God knows what kind of perverts it has dragged into our fair city and bangs every night." "That is completely out of line." That was Gibson.  Taylor controlled herself.  That was a shot at Bob, not just at Taylor.  She was glad Bob was not there to do something stupid.  Had Mrs. McCarthy been talking? What had she said?  Was she given to embellishment?  Taylor took a deep breath. "I'm not sorry.  You f--- can take this stupid onshoring --- and shove it up your -" "That is quite enough."  This was the head of HR. "You can take your sissy ways and sashay -" "You are fired." "You can't fire me." "Oh, yes I can," said the office manager.  The VP took another swig from his bottle. "Try it."  He looked uncertain. "I will have you removed.  Are you going to leave on your own?  I am calling the police to help you leave." And he dialed the number. He stomped out cursing. They heard him noisily go down the hall.  This was the front conference room.  He actually went through security and out the door, throwing his badge on the ground on his way.  The guard picked it up. They could see this through the glass wall. "Can you fire a VP?" "The Board told me that if anyone gives me problems they should be shown the door. Even a VP.  I can fire everyone here. I won't, of course. Those were problems." "Are you alright, Taylor?" She nodded.  "I've heard worse.  Shall we continue?" And they did.   The last item was that certain business people in China had been arrested, and the corporation that had been supporting them all these years had been dissolved.  They were on their own, and the Board was dead serious on straightening things out.  After this meeting, Taylor believed it.  She did not attend the meeting to discuss how to distribute the few duties the VP of Manufacturing had done.  That was ultimately up to the Board.    
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Lunch was at Cabaret, still free.  The place was quiet: it was the sort of place you took a business client to impress them, and the few other people were in business suits.  Most of the legal profession was there.   She told him of the morning's frustrations, breaking her own rule about confidentiality.  She asked Karen how the branding was going, and Karen had snapped back that she had not started on it yet - they had all these proposals.  Taylor had explained that it was important, for the two o'clock meeting, and Karen told her to do it herself.  Karen pointed out that Taylor could not touch her - her uncle was on the Board and her brother was VP of Manufacturing.  Nor would the two computer guys go out to the plant - they were playing some kind of MMORPG and simply not available. If she wanted the pictures, she should go.  Mary prayed an Ave Maria, but both she and Brenda were racing to get the proposal out. The client wanted it Friday for review.   She didn't bring up what Mrs. McCarthy had told her.  She wasn't sure how to approach it.  She thought of telling her of a 'something more comfortable' she had bought in case he ever DID show up at her door. It was in the bottom drawer of her dresser, ready to go.  Instead she talked about moving to a place with a garage.  Several of the abandoned houses had one, and they had been maintained well with China cash.   Bob had finally realized that when he was introduced as Bob, Taylor's boyfriend, that was just how things were done here. Other people had introduced each other in terms of family relationships, which were strong.  Long before you found out anything else about someone, you knew how they were related.  Family kept people from leaving Millville.    "What is the real name of this town, anyway?"   She laughed.  "I am trying to find that out.  It's 'Welcome to Millvale' when you come into town from the north, and 'Welcome to Millville' on the south.  I have counted two other variants."   "What a town. Roosevelt is like that, with the families, but there is only one spelling."  
    • Ashley0616
      Nothing wrong with that. I'm glad that you found what makes you happy! Just curious what does your wife think? If it's too personal I understand.
    • Ashley0616
    • Ashley0616
      – According to a recent survey, the most popular name for a dog is Max. Other popular names include Molly, Sam, Zach, and Maggie.
    • Ashley0616
    • Ashley0616
      Either new environment/ not potty trained
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Bob was on his way home from the dojo and he "just happened" to driver by her place. It was 10:30.  Her light was still on.  He knew exactly where she was sitting.  He saw her in his mind.   A fierce wave of desire that took his breath away suddenly showed up. All he had to do was stop, get out of the car, walk to the door and knock.  She would answer, glad to see him.  She would know why he was there and what he wanted. She would invite him in, maybe get him something to drink, disappear for a moment and return in "something more comfortable."  She would lead him back. Oh, joy.   And never, ever speak to him again afterwards.  Or she would not let him in but be angry about it.  In no way, emotionally, physically, mentally or spiritually, was she ready for this, and he knew it, if he was honest with himself, and she knew he knew it.  She would look upon it as another assault and their relationship would be irretrievably broken.  He would have to leave town. It would devastate her. It would devastate him.    He fought himself.  He was frozen to his seat as his reason and his body fought. He was twenty four years old, a full-blooded male with normal desires; he had just worked out and he was ready.  All he had to do now was open the car door. No one would know. He held his hands, one in the other, to keep one from moving, against his reason and will, to open that door.  He did not want to be a slave of his desires.   He looked across the street.  Mrs. McCarthy, sister of his landlord, was peeking though her window.  She knew his car.  Everyone in town would know by noon the next day if he got out of the car.  Taylor did not need that, either, and she would know, if he came to the door now, what a selfish thing it would be: in his own eyes, in the eyes of Taylor, in the eyes of the town, and worst of all, in the eyes of God.   He sat there a moment longer.  He was, as he reflected, entering into her sufferings in a small way that she would be made whole, healthy and happy: what he wanted more than anything.  But this hurt.  Why had all this come on her?  He asked God again, but there was only silence. He drove home in that silence. He chided himself for even going on her street and for driving on it other nights.  He would stop that, he told himself.   ------------------------------------------   The next morning Taylor went out to her car to go to work.  Mrs. McCarthy met her before she got to it. "I thought you were going to get lucky last night, dearie," she said. Taylor was puzzled. "Why, what do you mean?" "That young fellow - you know, Bob - he's been driving around here, going up and down the street some nights, not stopping.  Well, last night he parked and sat in his car for a while.   I think he was staring at your window.  I think he was trying to get up the courage to knock on the door. I was rooting for him.   But then he drove away.  Faint heart never won fair lady, as they say. What a shame. You two are a lovely couple.  Well, have a good day!" "Thank you, Mrs. McCarthy."  Taylor knew Bob extremely well and knew what had been going through his mind.  She was more than grateful he had not gotten out of the car. Better for him, better for her, better for everybody.  Surgery "down there" sooner than later.  This was driving the poor boy crazy. It was driving her crazy, too.  But she had a lot to work through. Surgery "up here" she said, pointing to her head.  She woke up her therapist on the way to work.  They were still talking when she pulled into her designated parking spot.  That was a perk that had happened yesterday.  She took a deep breath and headed into work. It would be another wild day.
    • Ashley0616
      bittersweet: especially : pleasure accompanied by suffering or regret
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I'm thinking about some interactions yesterday I did, while presenting as male but acting as female, that were far better than I did when I was presenting as male and acting as male.  #girlunderhood. I do a crappy job at acting as male and I am giving it up.  I am not talking about feminine gestures or presentation but just relating as a woman.  People don't realize I am doing it but it is a whole lot easier to do.   You don't just put on a dress and BOOM you are a girl.  You are a girl and you put on a dress.  Or not. Whether I am in jeans or a skirt (I wish, wife would have lots to say) I am a girl.  I don't need $250 in makeup and heels and hose and all that.  I don't need surgery. Honey, I have arrived.  Now I have to work out how that best works in my life, causing the minimal damage and creating the maximum good, but I have more working room.   Oh, and I am still pissed off at everyone and everything. #Contradictory.
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      @Willow it is certainly possible that my husband planned it. Placing me in the path of an opportunity....he certainly does things like that. GF has done some work for the company as an outside consultant, so I'm sure the company owner knows what potential resources are around.    It could also have just happened randomly. He has taken me to work with him before, just because he likes to have me around. I remember one time that I fell asleep with my head in his lap, and he held a meeting with his subordinates without waking me and making me move.  The company culture is family oriented and relaxed.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      The photo is great.  Software is phenomenal but it also is sort of a promise of things to come. Years ago this sort of thing took a photographer and Photoshop and all sorts of things and you would say, "I can look like THIS??"   Me, I am a duck.  That's from my driver's license.  Just kidding.
    • MaeBe
      I lucked into that picture. I took like 10 before that, which appropriately make me look like a donkey. ;)   Thank you so much for the compliment!
    • Mmindy
      You're welcome Sally,   Hugs,   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...