Support line help

[Guest Faith gibson]

Hi everyone,

It's nice to see LP up and running. So I`m going to post something. I heve been kind of reluctant to post lately so we`ll see.

Last week I called a support line that is based in a city a few hours away from me. The center is for gender and sexually diverse people. Most of the people I have talked to there have been very caring and have listened very politely to me, but they pretty much have all been gay. It`s just that it occured to me, during our talk last week, that this person might not really understand what I`m experiencing. I`m not sure it matters. I mean they were a comfort in that she listened to me and, I feel, truly wanted to support me. So in that respect, I did feel better after talking to her.

So this is where my mind is messing with me a bit. Even though she is reaching out and comforting another human being and truly cares, does she really see me as female? I know many will dislike this, but I often get the feeling that people, even people that are trying to support me, are not truly seeing who I am. I don't get the opportunity to really communicate, in real life, with many other transgender people. Though there have been some, and for that I'm so grateful.

Maybe, like I said, this is where my mind is messing me up. That nagging doubt you have when you go out in public, all the insecurity. Do I, after all these years of being basically forced to live as I did, do I sometimes fail to see who I truly am? So is it surprising that it is difficult for others that are not transgender? It must be so difficult for them.

It makes me truly appreciate the ones that try.

Anyways, that's my thought for today. It probably isn't really as flushed out as it should be.

Faith

[Carolyn Marie]

It's pretty hard to judge the perceptions, or mis-preceptions, of anyone who (whom?) you cannot interact with face to face. So on that score, Faith, your doubts are not unreasonable. Sometimes you have to just have...ahem...faith.

For future reference, there is the Trans Lifeline (877-565-8860), which is staffed by trans folk who have taken a course in crisis intervention. They should certainly have more knowledge of, and empathy for, what you are going through than most others.

Take care, Faith.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[Charlize]

Faith i certainly understand how you are feeling. It has been difficult for me to open up about my difficulties with people in the cis community who have never experienced the difficulties society placed in front of me. Simply being myself is hard. There are those who do their best to help. Bless them. We definitely need allies and i think we are getting more of them but contact and support from others who "understand" can go a lot further at times.

I think Carolyn has a great idea in going to the Trans* Lifeline. I remember when they started up and it seems they are gaining momentum. Perhaps even better is to volunteer there yourself as your understanding of trans* life can certainly help others.

Hugs,

Charlize