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One big step coming...


Dakota16

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When I left work yesterday, I asked the boss/company owner for some time to talk about a personal matter and set the wheels in motion. If things line up, I'll be coming out to work today! :)

I have to admit it does nothing for my normally high anxiety levels so I'm a bundle of nerves, but it has to be done. I can't keep changing between two identities anymore.

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  • Admin

Best wishes to you.  Even if it is not full and total support and acceptance, or may even be a bit cold, it will change in time.  To some of these people it will be a shock, and to some it will be a ho-hum thing, but it will still take time, and reactions will flip-flop over the next several months.  All major changes go through a predictable cycle before they are completed in everyone's minds.

You will not have failed in what you did, you started a change and it will be fine in time.

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It's all right to feel a bit of anxiety since this is an important matter to you but don't let it control you.  You'll do fine.  Vicky's comment is spot on. 

Jani

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Good luck, Dakota! No matter how it turns out, it's a step foreward. Hopefully it won't be a painful step. Keeping fingers crossed!

 

Lots of love,

Timber Wolf?

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We're all behind you!  Let us know how it goes.  Best!!!!!!

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

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Oh my gosh, I'm so excited! 

I work in the office for a transportation company and there are only nine people working in the building. My original hope was to go straight to the company's owner, who is very active in keeping things going since there isn't a specific HR person. Our schedules haven't yet come together, but I did go to the person responsible for company compliance who also does the vast majority of hiring. I briefly explained that I've been going through changes at home and it was time to bring those changes into the workplace. That's when I flat out said I'm transgender. She smiled and said she suspected for awhile since she was watching what I was wearing to work (in all honesty, I've been wearing women's clothes to work for about a year now, before I fully understood who I am). We ended up having a nice conversation about it and will continue tomorrow, hopefully with the owner involved as well. I'm going to email some links I've found about having a transgender employee/coworker, along with my name and pronoun preferences.

I'm not entirely there yet, but I'm one step closer to being me at work! :)

I'll keep you all posted! :)

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That's so good.  See, no reason to get all worked up.  You had already outed yourself! 

Congratulations on a big step forward.

Jani

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So tomorrow is the big day! It'll be me, the compliance manager, and the company owner all sitting down together to come up with a way to work together on my transition! I'm sure I'll be asked about preferences and such, but other than my name, female pronouns, dressing as me both in the office and behind the wheel, and respecting what I'm going through, I'm not sure what else I should bring up. I've looked through resources about coming out to employers, but I'm overwhelmed with all the excitement of finally being able to be me and pretty much go full-time. Does anyone have any suggestions on what else I should bring up?

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Well, one week after telling the boss/owner that I wanted to talk, I finally got the chance earlier today. The conversation went ridiculously well, covering the more immediate things like company paperwork still needs to have my birth name until I change it legally (which I fully expected anyway), and making sure to let me know that if I did encounter any negative reactions or discrimination I can always go to them. The boss wasn't surprised either, saying he's been waiting for me to come out. Apparently I've been outing myself the entire time without realizing it. :)

My announcement last week forced them to get their updated employee handbook ready (which they've been dragging their feet on with other things happening so it ended up working out) and out to all employees. But then came the best news of the conversation: Dakota starts going to work on the 20th! And four days later is my first bus trip as me! :)

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Great news!!!!!:D:):applause: Woo hoo!

I love hearing good news like this. Congrat's!?

 

Lots of love,

Timber Wolf?

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The entire office staff knows Dakota shows up Monday! One co-worker emailed me saying congrats and they support my transition. The company owner is already calling me Dakota and they changed the name on my mailbox yesterday. This will be an interesting first week for sure! :)

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So happy to read your latest update Dakota! Very happy for you and I can't imagine the feelings you are having. :D Thank you sharing!

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