Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

The Paper Trail That Never Dies


Carolyn Marie

Recommended Posts

  • Admin

It's been at least five years since I came out to the medical staff at my HMO, and got my medical records changed with my new name and gender, and probably four years since I had any issues with them.

So I was unpleasantly surprised to find out that some medical records (apparently) never die, and I'll probably be followed around by them until the day I do.

I went to an ophthalmologists office yesterday for a first visit.  All went well, until, in the exam room, the nurse asked me about some (very) old paper records that were clipped to my chart, with my old name on them.  They were from 2008 and 1998, for heaven's sake!  I don't know where they dredged those up from.

In any case, I assumed that the jig was up as to me being trans.  She suggested I talk to my home office staff to get it straightened out, which I said I would do.

She left to get something, and when she returned, being curious, I asked her if I was her first trans patient. The light bulb went on over her head, and she looked at me and smiled and said that, until that moment, she didn't know that I was trans.  She thought the records belonging to the male person weren't mine at all, but some random person with the same last name.   :blink:

We laughed, and I was both amused and delighted that it never occurred to the nurse that I could ever have been anything other than the woman she saw before her.

But that old paperwork; I doubt I'll ever be completely shed of that stuff.  <_<   The past is always present.

Carolyn Marie

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Good story.  I have to get my medical records squared away relative to my gender marker. 

Jani

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

 Great story Carolyn Marie.  Our old records just ride along with us.  Having lived in the same place most of my life he still gets the occasional piece of mail.  When he goes to the doctor they knew him.  Oh well i do get a kick out of the reactions at times when folks figure things out.  it still happens 5 years later and i suppose it always will.  Just part of life i guess.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Link to comment

I'm seeing this with clients at work and vendors asking for <dead name>. With vendors I just say that person is no longer there. Clients, I just tell them with an implied wink "I changed my name amongst other things in my life."

I'm still getting the EZ-Pass notices for the transponder my ex uses in my dead name and I've given up doing anything about. I can't change the primary account name to her name.....

Link to comment

Yep, paper trails & background checks (another, currently-active, thread)...a very tangled web....  [Sometimes I wonder if we try so hard to change society's perceptions about ts/tg stuff because so many of us are so terrified of not being able to completely, totally, 100% hide/bury our pas???.]

Link to comment
Guest Lizzie McTrucker

That happened to me at a walk-in clinic I haven't been to in over 15 years. The check-in lady was super nice and discreet about it, calling me up to ask me a question but really keeping the conversation to almost a whisper for privacy. We quickly sorted out that, yes, that used to be me and I thanked her for her discreteness with such a matter. 

Link to comment
On 4/14/2017 at 9:58 AM, Carolyn Marie said:

But that old paperwork; I doubt I'll ever be completely shed of that stuff.  <_<   The past is always present.

What a wonderful story, Carolyn. That brought a smile to my face. 

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   7 Members, 0 Anonymous, 194 Guests (See full list)

    • LC
    • Ivy
    • Sally Stone
    • AllieJ
    • April Marie
    • Adrianna Danielle
    • Ashley0616
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.6k
    • Total Posts
      768k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,016
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Missing_in_action
    Newest Member
    Missing_in_action
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Bowie Ellis
      Bowie Ellis
      (19 years old)
    2. Damien Mcknight
      Damien Mcknight
      (18 years old)
    3. JJ
      JJ
      (77 years old)
    4. KathyLauren
      KathyLauren
      (70 years old)
    5. memyselfandwe
      memyselfandwe
      (44 years old)
  • Posts

    • Sally Stone
      How we look in photographs isn't really anything we can control.  I've actually searched for answers and there are lots of good explanations out there like this one:   https://www.foxbackdrop.com/blogs/news/beautiful-photogenic-reasons-tricks-foxbackdrop#:~:text=Based on the light-creation,angular faces are usually photogenic.   The simplest explanation is a picture captures our image two-dimensionally when in real-life, we are seen three-dimensionally.  A person can be beautiful or handsome in real life but the two-dimensional image can be way different.  So, for those of us that don't think we look good in a picture, fear not.  We are much better looking in three-dimensions.  
    • LC
      This is your journey and no one here will judge you or bully you. This is a very accepting, non-judgemental place and you can process at your own speed. Having said all welcome Violet, we are glad you found us. I know we all look forward to hearing from you.
    • Willow
      Good morning    I should not have said about sleeping in, now I have to go in 2 ½ hours earlier.  Oh well at least I. Off tomorrow and Monday, I think.as of now, hope I didn’t just jinx that too.     Hot today high 80s dropping quickly and rain to the 60s for a couple of days then more normal 70s.  It just depends on which way the wind blows. Off the gulf, hotter, off the ocean, cooler, out of the north rain and when they all converge, look out.  That’s today.   i made a pot of coffee but I think most of it is going to waste.  My wife went back to bed and I’m not good with coffee when I’m hot, and I am. That’s my fault, I was 4 days.late with my E again.  I just st have a really hard time keeping on a 10 day schedule.  And my reminders aren’t helping..   now I’m going to peak by tomorrow since it isn’t all absorbed in one day, I’ll hold fairly steady but if I’m late again I’ll drop well below my target yet again.     Im down in the valley, the valley so low But I see my true love, at the top of the hill i climb the mountain, but she is not there for she has gone back down, to the valley below   I didn’t come up with a refrain and with that I’m calling the guys with the padded cells. lol   Willow    
    • Adrianna Danielle
      Finding a few pictures from a trip to Thailand I went to 10 years ago.They were pictures taken with Katois aka ladyboys.It was cool to meet them and planning to go back next year.A couple of them saw I am transgender too.
    • April Marie
      Congratulations and Happy Anniversary!!!! A beautiful milestone.    I hope to see you tonight...I just have to stay awake long enough!!
    • Mirrabooka
      It's funny with photos isn't it, how we think we look in them vs. how we actually do look in them! I'm hopeless at smiling and I have to try really hard not to frown or look like a zombie. I'm never sure how I come across to others.   I had a moment late last night when my eldest daughter facetimed my wife for some now forgotten reason, and when I was handed the tablet and talking to her, I was fixated on my image in the corner. My hair was wild at the time, I was a bit tipsy and all I saw was a woman! I have no idea what she saw in that context. I'll probably never know.
    • KathyLauren
      I hope to see you on the Zoom meeting tonight, April.  I might be late, since I am doing lights and sound for a play that opened last night.  I was home before ten last night, so I think I'll be able to make it.   Today is an anniversary for me.  Seven years ago today, I stood up at the weekly community kaffeeklatsch as <deadname> and announced that henceforth I would be Kathy.  It went as well as I could have imagined: there were some surprised looks, but no hostility and lots of support.  A whole layer of stress disappeared that day and has never come back.  (There have been other stresses, but that one is gone.)  I have been me full-time ever since that moment.
    • Mirrabooka
      This is a scarily accurate description of what I feel!   I hope I don't sound too schmaltzy by saying this, but I remember when I signed up to this forum last year, during the sign-up process the question is asked, "Why do you want to join TransPulse?" to which I wrote, "Looking for a home where I can freely write about my issues and interact with similar people."    I think I just found one. ❤️
    • Heather Shay
    • Heather Shay
      When do you know you've had enough surgery?
    • Heather Shay
      Another week completed with more inregration.
    • Heather Shay
      Relief (emotion) Wikipedia https://en.wikipedia.org › wiki › Relief_(emotion)         Relief is a positive emotion experienced when something unpleasant, painful or distressing has not happened or has come to an end.
    • Heather Shay
    • Heather Shay
    • Heather Shay
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...