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Gwen

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Gwen

I'm a late bloomer. But I can see that the markers were there for decades but I didn't understand or recognize them: feeling uncomfortable around men, loving the clothing, company and conversation of women, and coping with my overly sensitive nature. And then there was Halloween, just after I turned 7. I wore a dress as a costume, because my family was poor, and I felt wonderful!! (I seem to recall it was long, light-colored and touched my knees.) Others told me I would "make a great girl," and this was all I needed to hear. This experience stayed with me throughout my life and I can still recall walking around in the dark, very aware of the dress brushing against my legs.

 

Fast forward to earlier this year. I was considering getting a tattoo to celebrate my feminine nature - it would've been my first - but then I changed my mind and impulsively shaved my body hair instead. Really. Fortunately I didn't have much and the task was easy. This blew open some door in me that I didn't know existed, and I felt I had released my male to allow my female take over. And she has. Since then I've been consuming lots and lots of information and have started therapy, with the hope of transitioning one day. Every something new arrives and I'm trying to relish the journey.

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Dev

Welcome to the site, Gwen.  I'm glad you found us.  Our true selves have a way of making themselves known, don't they?

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Gwen

Thanks, Dev. You're so right. My favorite moments are when I read something that resonates with me, here and elsewhere, and I become tearful or begin crying. I can trust these moments. My being is talking.

 

I'd like to add that I've come to really enjoy this site. I've learned so much here and I'm pleased to join the community.

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bobbisue

Congratulations Gwen  you have just started the most amazing journey of your life I joined this site in August 2015 I was a total wreck but with the help and advice I found here I am am 4 months on HRT out to my friends and family and will be getting a referal to the next Step towards GRS  You sound like you are in a much better place than I was when I started  Enjoy your journey 

 

   bobbisue:)

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Jani423

Hello Gwen and welcome!  I'm glad you found us too and I hope you find what you're looking for in life.  Often it's right in front of us.  Enjoy your journey.

 

Jani

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Charlize

Welcome Gwen,

I'm glad your joining in.  When i started to get open and honest here with others it really helped me find a path.  It is also great to know that your not alone.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

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Gwen

Thanks everyone. The reason I decided to finally join is that I missed my transgender support group meeting. I was surprised that I had mixed up the dates and more surprised that I felt so disappointed that I couldn't attend. It only meets once a month and it would be a long wait for another. Oh well, I'm here. All better :)

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Timber Wolf

Hi Gwen,

Welcome to TransPulse. I'm so glad you're here! After having dressed as a teen, I buried it for years. Everytime I had a girly thought or feeling I told myself to stop thinking that and be a "real man". Finally something happened and it was like an explosion. The genie got out of the bottle and wouldn't go back in. Before long I was pouring over all the information I could dig up, but was terrified to reveal my secret. I was all alone and thinking suicidally. Then I found these forums. I reached out and found I was no longer alone in the world.  I'm glad that you have already been getting orher sorces of support and help. I started that after finding these forums. I guess you could say my whole trans life springboarded from this site. I found the encouragement to do the things I had thought I could never dare. Enjoy your journey, I wish you well!

 

Lots of love,

Timber Wolf🐾

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tracy_j

Hi Gwen

 

Welcome :)

 

You are among friends here

 

Tracy x

 

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    • Jani423
      Hello "Girl inside my head", welcome!  Certainly do dive in and look about, and ask questions.     Do you have a name that you use, that we could call you?  Cheers, Jani  
    • Jani423
      That's what I took it to mean, that they could do more.  I think he was just giving an honest appraisal.  30% in top management is really good and I would think this is a high number for financial businesses overall.      Jani 
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      That sounds pretty good. I wonder why he said it was a "mixed review," unless its just to say that more work needs to be done.  Thanks, Jani.   Carolyn Marie
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      Thank you! I'm excited to learn on my journey to self discovery. 
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      Welcome.  Feel free to dive in and ask questions.  We're all here to help!
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      New user as of today.    I struggle as a male but I'm a female trapped in a man's body.    I think and act like a girl but in a man's body.    I someday hope to be the real me. 
    • Alessa
      Thank you all so much. I really appreciate your responses!   The consensus seems to be to keep it to myself, and be prepared to document potential harassment, and only then make an issue out of it. I think that is the route I'll take. Phew - that's a load off!   @tracy_j, your experience sounds a lot like my potential situation. I really appreciate you sharing that.   I've read the HR policy on the dress code, and it says not to wear anything casual - to keep it business appropriate, which I think even in the unlikely event I'm brave enough to wear woman's clothing to work, so long as it's business-attire, it technically shouldn't be an issue. I took your advice looking at legal issues, and if I'm understanding it correctly, both my state and the federal law protect against discrimination based on sex which may include pregnancy, gender identity, or orientation as well as biological sex organs.
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      Congratulations Shawnna on your one year anniversary.  I hope all your dreams come true!    Jani
    • Cbxshawn
      Wow, it's been a year on HRT. I have come a long way in a year. If you told me I would still be on cloud 9 back then, I wouldn't have believed you. But here I am and still feeling great. Thank you all for being here and supporting me through this last year. I am looking forward to the things to come.    Hugs    Shawnna 
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