Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

jae bear

Bears & Bunnies

Recommended Posts

jae bear

so long I've been hiding from everyone but me
I denied it and I'd hide it from all who might see
mom sewed on my bear suit when I was eleven
so others couldn't see me, so only we'd know

 

I peeked from the shadows and honesty saw me
it caught me and bit me and tore at my body
found a stitched thread then looked deep in my eyes
quietly called me a coward a fraud and a lie
pulling me close, said it still loved me
as it started to pull on that little brown thread

 

fast stitches opened revealing a small sliver
of soft furry lilac that shouldn't quite live there
unraveling thread exposed color hidden forever
everyone knows bears are just brown black or silver

 

calling me out of the dark, commanding me to stand
I am so scared of knowing the light is at hand
I looked down to see my old suit was now threadbare
it was beaten and tattered from such poor bear care

 

time has worn me and torn me, I've lost my excuse
my time as a bear grasping the tail of a caboose
the bunny is growing, she does not want to pretend
her ears are becoming impossible to bend
bunny tails don't fit on brown bear behinds

 

my wife's a big bunny, I love her so dearly
her paw pulled away when I let her see clearly
she still does not know what is inside this bear
but sooner or later she will see what is there

 

everything's happening so fast, my heads gonna pop
the clock keeps on ticking, I can not make it stop
I must tell her soon, I don't want her to cry
we could be bunnies together if she just let us try

 

my growl and my roar failed with those stitches
now I cry ever time she scolds and she bitches
brave bear hormones no long there to protect me
estrogen and progesterone profoundly affect me
 

I desperately need some bunny friends of my own
very soon my fur color will be have to be shown
in less than a year my ears will be sticking out straight
my bear nose with fall and show my scared bunny face

 

all the dogs and cats go on just like normal
I doubt that they'll notice one fat grizzly bunny
I have no plan to tell them they don't need to know
I only want my wife Bunny to take me back home

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
bobbisue

     Beautifully poignant 

 

bobbisue:)

Share this post


Link to post
jae bear

Thank you Bobbiesue, the words came so fast it was hard to write down... The tears didnt help one bit either. I see I need to edit here and there and I would love to revise things, unfortunately I can figure out how to do it.

squishy hugs,

Jae

Share this post


Link to post
Timber Wolf

Hi Jae,

You've got friends here. Always remember that. Hopefully soon we'll be friends you can share joys with, but we're here on the rainy days too.

 

Lots of love and a big hug,

Timber Wolf🐾

Share this post


Link to post
Charlize

If there is some major need for a revision please contact one of the moderators.  I found i needed to proofread and that has helped me although i forget from time to time. Hence my typoooos.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Share this post


Link to post
jae bear

Hi Charlize,

I'm sorry, I was rushing and wiping tears off then my wife came home... I didn't want to get caught- I will take the time to rewrite it and ask to revise it later today. Thanks for the help!

Squishy hugs

Jae

Share this post


Link to post
Petra Jane

The way I write is to use a text editor, even if it's just Notepad, then once I'm happy with the result, and checked the syntax, spelling, grammar etc, then post it to my site. The best thing to do would be to copy it from the original post, if you haven't got a copy on your device/machine, paste it into Notepad, make your tweaks, then as Charlize says, contact a Mod and ask them to change the text for your edited copy.

Share this post


Link to post
jae bear

Hi Petra Jane,

 How funny, that's just what I did, I thought it was to low end but it worked fine for me...

squishy hugs,

Jae

Share this post


Link to post
jae bear

oops, forgot to mention I sent a revised copy to Dev...

Thanks!

Share this post


Link to post
jae bear

thanks to Dev for revising my post... I felt the changes were needed, it's funny what you still leave out even when your trying to be completely honest.

Love to you all,

Jae

Share this post


Link to post
BrandiBri

My heart goes out to you, Jae. It's pure h___ if your spouse won't support you. I know from experience, my wife would have no part of it and demanded that I not dress that way, so I had to dress behind her back. That's hard emotionally and I completely understand how you feel. I guess I could have been the one to write that poem as it's my story as well. You nailed it!

 

Love, Brandi

Share this post


Link to post
jae bear

Hi Brandi,

 I only came out to her about the cross dressing, I have yet to drop the girl and hormone part... That's gonna take a while and some counseling before it happens- As I've said before, "if she screams, accuses me of being a cross-dresser and tells me to get out, I'll just pack up her things and go"

 

(not really, I'd beg at her feet on my hands and knees and lie my tail off)

 

squishy hugs,

Jae

 

Share this post


Link to post
BrandiBri

Jae,

I understand completely, at that time even I didn't know that I was transgender.  She died before I realized that I was more than a crossdresser. When the time comes to tell her the rest, I wish you the best of luck. I truly it goes well.

 

Love, Brandi

Share this post


Link to post
jae bear

Thanks Brandi, I'll take all the luck I can get! I'm about to post a new poem you might like!

HUGE Hugs,

Jae

Share this post


Link to post

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

  • Who's Online   5 Members, 0 Anonymous, 57 Guests (See full list)

    • SaraAW
    • AdriannaB
    • Josie Beth
    • Claire 1960
    • A. Dillon
  • Topics With Zero Replies

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      69,749
    • Total Posts
      630,354
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      6,096
    • Most Online
      8,356

    TgirlJenn
    Newest Member
    TgirlJenn
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Callie40
      Callie40
      (45 years old)
  • Posts

    • SaraAW
      Happy to hear things went well and the friendship rekindling will continue. 
    • SaraAW
      Nothing to add other than my support for both to find a solution you’re happy with. I know how important hair can be to ones self identity. *hugs*
    • SaraAW
      Welcome Michaela, glad you found this place. Happy to hear the support of your wife is with you. 
    • ShawnaLeigh
      Welcome Micheals it’s a pleasure to meet you.  Your intro post was quite pleasant to read and I am so glad your wife is being so d sad supportive and accepting.   There are some here not so lucky.  This is a great place to learn more about yourself and make some friends that are in the same boat.  I look forward to reading more! 
    • ShawnaLeigh
      Thank you very much Kate and may I say welcome with a warm heart.   I am thinking about just going in to get my standard cut soon as my attempt to grow my hair again has failed.  So I am conceding defeat and I have ordered an inexpensive wig to use around the house and “practice “.  I live in Vermont so I am not so worried about the heat and humidity, especially right now.  Lol  
    • tracy_j
      I am glad things are going well Susan. It takes time for someone to process things so the month may be ideal.   Tracy
    • DeeDee
      So that sounds like it was definitely a success x 
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2020/01/pakistan-gives-free-health-care-transgender-people/     Carolyn Marie
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://www.nbcnews.com/feature/nbc-out/n-j-bans-gay-transgender-panic-defenses-n1120416     Carolyn Marie
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://www.wsj.com/articles/south-koreas-military-discharges-transgender-soldier-11579697345   Carolyn Marie
    • Kate Carter
      Hi Shawna, I'm kind of in the same boat, MPB recovered a good bit, but at 15 months of HRT, I'm probably just hanging onto false hope for a full head of hair.  I was clean shaven for a long time (20 years), and I'm not sure that's the best way to go.  In my experience, my skin wasn't too happy with the wig cap being on it all the time.  You can wear protective caps and then the wig, but I'd also think just having some shortish hair cover might give a little more protection, as well as provide some grip for some wigs with small hair combs to hold them in place.   The other option you should look into before changing your current hair would be toppers.  In men the short styles aren't often the best looking, but there are long haired female toppers with human hair that can be dyed, styled, and blended with your natural hair.  I'm growing mine out now to pursue that option.  Depending on where you live, it's potentially a much more comfortable solution, temperature/humidity-wise, and provides more flexibility for exercise.   Figures that my first post would be about MPB.   Best of luck, Kate
    • AdriannaB
      HRT,I have a family history of blood clots and this was discussed with my therapist with the pill form.I had one 2 years ago and was lucky to survive it.Surgeon was good to me about the BA,he has done them with the patients not on HRT.One was my good friend Meghan done two years ago
    • Susan R
      Hi Adrianna, This is wonderful news about your coming out to family and work.  as you are finding out, it gets easier as time goes on.  You start to care even less what others think of it, so much so, that you end up telling people you hadn’t even planned on coming out to in the course of your journey.  I had a question about your upcoming Breast Augmentation surgery.  I’m not sure how far along you are regarding the BA but is your surgeon concerned about you not having been on HRT prior to the surgery?  Once you've had the BA surgery and then down the road decide to start on HRT, your breasts can get so much larger than you had planned or possibly wanted (depending on your genetic disposition). My internal medicine doctor said that she wanted me on HRT at least a year if I wanted BA surgery.  I realize that other IM docs or endocrinologists may not be that conservative in their approach.   I am just curious if you’ve had this discussion yet.  In my case as it turns out, I’m not going to have any BA because I am almost where I want to be at 16 months HRT.   Congratulations on your coming out, Susan R🌷  
    • FrozenWinter
      Thank you very much for your warm welcomes and the compliment. I still have a lot to learn and am trying to be more open, so I will appreciate your advices and guidance and share my stories when I can.  By the way, we are preparing for Lunar New Year holiday (we call it Tet holiday) here in Vietnam as well as some other asian countries and I am so excited. 
    • Lucca
      Ok, so, I've talked about this on PM some, but for everyone else, my relationship with this friend is totally kaput now. I waited a couple weeks of no contact and then called her to talk, she started things off by saying that she forgave me because she assumed my hormone medication was making me unreasonable (which I do not believe is a fair assessment of the situation). Not really a great thing to say to a trans person, it's kind of like telling a cis woman with a personal grievance "you're being totally crazy, but it's ok because I assume you're on your period." She tried to claim some kind of enlightened, insider knowledge on gender transition and how crazy it makes people because she had been friends with another trans person in the past. This really threw me for a loop and I wasn't very collected the rest of the call, it was obvious I was getting choked up or crying and trying to power through it. She refused to talk about anything and just wanted to "move forward" and make plans for the immediate future without actually addressing anything. I forced the issue and she eventually apologized but was obviously very irritated and really didn't want to.   I called her the next day when I had regained my composure and told her in no uncertain terms that we can forgive and forget and agree to disagree on all the past stuff, but she cannot blame either my past behavior or any future behavior on these nonsense hormone issues she's making up. She got so mad when I said this that she was literally yelling at me over the phone within minutes, shouting about how I wasn't in my right mind because I was hormonal. So that's over!   Jesus Christ, what a nutcase. I am not wasting any more time with someone who thinks I'm a mental invalid who can't advocate for myself. I mean, HRT can cause mood swings in the early stages, but it's usually relatively minor. I doesn't cause people to lose their mind and do and say things that are entirely out of character that they don't mean, which is basically what she wanted me to admit to, to say "yeah, I was crazy 'cuz of the hormones, you were right about everything." My god, I've never been more insulted and talked down to in my life. Good riddance.
  • Upcoming Events

×
×
  • Create New...