Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

I'm New, Confused, and Lost...


Hey, it's Alex!

Recommended Posts

Hey everybody. So, for a long while, I have identified as non-binary. I've only told a very few of my close friends, however, I've never felt comfortable being called she or sometimes even them. Thinking back, I've always felt more comfortable being called by the male pronouns. I started to believe I may be transgender. Growing up, I always told myself there was no way I could be trans because I liked dress. I, of course, knew this was a lie. I didn't like dresses. I hated them. My mother, on the other hand, loved them and I always wanted to make her happy. This is also the same reason why I still have longish hair, which I hate. I'm confused and don't know what to do. Any advice?

Link to comment
Guest Rachel Gia

Hi Alex,

l know more people that identify as Non Binary then I know Trans people.

i also seem to know more Trans Men than I do Trans Women.

You may not be aware of it but your generation is a massive positive force in non normative gender acceptance and awareness.

Just love the you , you know you are .

if you can be comfortable with who you are then others will be comfortable with you.

Above all stay safe in your process of letting others into your truth.

Rachel

Link to comment
  • Admin

Welcome to Trans Pulse, Alex.  I understand very well your confusion and anxiety; it is common among people just starting out exploring their gender issues.  If possible, a talk with a gender therapist might help you decide what path is the best for you, or at least help you understand yourself better.

 

In the meantime, please look around these forums, and I'm sure you'll find others who have felt the same, and may offer good advice.

 

HUGS

 

Carolyn Marie

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hey Alex, welcome.  There are lots of good comments here.  Most important, be you.  You will be much happier.

 

Jani

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Alex,

 I only just got here myself, but the help and love here is amazing...

squishy hug,

Jae

Link to comment

Thank you all. It really means alot to get actual feedback and advice from people that either are having similar issues or have already gone through something similar. Everyone's advice i very helpful and like I said, it truly means a lot.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Alex,

 I see you like drawing and writing! I am more of a technical drawing artist (trade profession) but I am working hard on improving my live subject art (really bad at the moment). And I just found my voice and wrote the first two poems of my whole life, it was far more intense that I could have possibly imagined! Keep drawing, keep writing, they are both very good for you!

squishy hugs,

Jae

Link to comment

Hey Jae Bear,

That's amazing. I'm a big fan of poetry and yeah, it can be pretty intense sometimes. It's pretty cool that you're an artist. Drawing (and writing) is great and you are very correct, they are both very good for you.

~Alex

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Alex,

I love to draw to relax, I honestly wish I was good enough to do a comic style antro set of characters, I would style it after my poems. Those poems are rough, I didn’t think that I’d cry the whole way through or every time I read them, they’re terrible and the form is awful but the content came from a place I keep locked up... I think I want to do a lot more writing, the poems seem to come easily to my head, almost like listening to music but sometimes I can’t shut it off. I hear it when I go to bed and I hear it when I wake up now and it’s really a bit tough as I nearly cry every time and it makes me late for work. But I know that it’s good for me and it opens parts of me that would never be heard if I didn’t allow myself to listen. so I encourage you to do the same, if you’re a writer you should write everything that you can imagine and let others see it so we can all benefit from your gift. If you love to draw you should draw as often as you can even if you’re terrible like me, the good artists are the ones that never quit.

big squishy hug,

Jae

Link to comment

Hey Jae Bear,

Yeah, I can understand your poetry problems. I have the same issue a large majority of the time. I use both writing and drawing as an outlet, so a lot of my feeling goes into them. This can be both good and bad, but it can definitely help sometimes. As for my drawing, I do not plan on stopping anytime soon. I also doubt you're as bad as you're making yourself out to be. If you want to do a comic style, go for it!

~Alex

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Alex,

Creative outlets such as those are never a waste of time even if they keep you from the routine responsibilities one has in daily life (Except maybe school). Nobody can take away the creative process that you’ve been gifted, so use it as much as you can and share your ability with the world! I really am quite terrible but one’s own standards are always different then we perceive,  my technical drawing is good but that’s to be expected, I do like to draw cars but that’s faded in interest over the years, I really feel like my art needs to come from my soul so lately I find anthro characters portray much of what I feel and I seem to connect with the idea much more than I do reality. There are some pretty darn good artists out there that I’m quite jealous of I wish my skills were up to the task of running out complete comic clips but sadly my skills are not ready to start there yet but I’m happy to draw and practice, and draw and practice, it makes me happy... The poem I wrote about bears and Bunny’s really let me spill something out that I could not have drawn properly. I’m really thinking poems might be a super good outlet for me but I know nothing of form I can only hear it in my head and hope that the cadence comes out right on the page. All the beautiful people here seem to understand even if what I write is such garbage, and to me the feelings in their hearts are much more important than the messy words on my page.

super big shquishy hug!

Jae

 

 

I Don’t often give out super big shquishy hugs, but when I do, it’s because someone made me very happy and I couldn’t control myself.

Link to comment

Hey Jae Bear,

I have to agree with you. Creative outlets often help us when other things can not and are great tools to use later in life. As for your 'issue' with your poetry, you may be interested in free verse. If you don't already know, free verse is poetry that doesn't have to rhyme and does not have a regular meter. This is a great kind of poetry because you make up your own rhythm as you go and it doesn't necessarily have to stick to a specific form. It is also a great place to start because it is fairly easy compared to some types of poetry.

~Alex

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Alex,

I will have to look into that! Sounds like a perfect fit for my terrible poetry! Bad or not I still love writing it, I've never done it before, but somehow it lets me say thing I can not articulate any other way...

Thank you & squishy hugs,

Jae

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Alex,

 I got out my daughters 'how to draw furries' book last night and realized it is for serious artists, not beginners... I think the author was just trying to show off a little. I am just going to keep knocking out the same little body form and bunny body overlay until I can do it from memory, I try to draw one every night if I can, just to keep that pencil moving. I might have to explore more digital methods, but I would really just use that to color in the pencil sketch anyway...

Hugs,

Jae

Link to comment

Hey Jae Bear,

That sounds like a great idea! It's always good to practice and then practice some more. Those books can be a bit difficult sometimes, but the usually are for different levels of artists. Keep drawing.

~Alex

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   6 Members, 0 Anonymous, 113 Guests (See full list)

    • Mmindy
    • Mallory Mayson
    • Ashley0616
    • MomTGDaughter
    • Susie
    • Adrianna Danielle
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.5k
    • Total Posts
      767.2k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      11,941
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Miss Cormac
    Newest Member
    Miss Cormac
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Amyjay
      Amyjay
      (58 years old)
    2. bettyjean
      bettyjean
    3. Breanna
      Breanna
      (52 years old)
    4. Emily Ayla
      Emily Ayla
    5. JET182
      JET182
  • Posts

    • Ashley0616
      I'm doing patches for now but I think soon I'll go to shots because it's hard to alternate when you are doing two .1 MG patches at once. Unless she gives me Estradiol and progesterone
    • Sally Stone
      Go Cleveland Guardians!  I love baseball and I loved playing it when I was younger.  
    • Sally Stone
      My view is we are "dependent" on government, because as a society, we are too lazy to stay actively involved. So, we let politicians do our bidding for us.  I think we'd be in a better place government wise if we policed the actions of our politicians.  We elected them; they work for us.  Sadly, we are allowing them to run amok.  We are where we are because we have chosen to let politicians make all decisions without us.  Remember "by the people, for the people?" That was the intent of our democracy.  Today, however, it is "by the politicians, for the politicians," the people be damned. 
    • Mmindy
      "Play Ball! Batter Up!" is the closing line of the National Anthem as far as I'm concerned. It's the call of the Home Plate Umpire and signals the start of the game. I grew up in the TV and Radio broadcast of the St. Louis Cardinals. Harry Caray, Jack Buck, Tim McCarver, and Mike Shannon, were the voices on my transistor radio. KMOX 1120 AM pushing 50,000 watts of Class A clear-channel non-directional signal. It could be picked up all across MO, IL, IN to the East. KS, OK, CO to the West. IA, MN to the North, and KY, TN, AR to the South. There has always been a rivalry against the Chicago Cubs, in the National League. As for the American League, I have to pull for the Kansas City Royals. I've also been a Little League Umpire, and fan of everything the Little League stands for. Going to Williamsport, PA and seeing the Little League World Series is in my top 10 things to do on my bucket list.   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • Mmindy
      Good evening everyone,   I don't think my mother ever cooked a meal that I didn't like. We also had a kitchen where mom fixed the food, dad filled your plate, and you eat it. It wasn't until our baby brother was born that we could have Pop-Tarts for snacks. Before that all snacks had to meet mom's approval, and in her opinion wouldn't prevent you from eating supper.   Well my day started off on a good note, but has become frustrating because my IT person didn't transfer my saved videos I use for teaching. Then I found out that they didn't save any of my book marks for websites I use frequently.   Best wishes, stay motivated,   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • MaeBe
      The number is relative to method of deliver, the time of the dose, and when the blood is drawn. However, I do want to keep away from DVT and other potential issues. I assume I may be getting backed down from my current dose, but my doc told me to stick with the higher dose, so? I also wonder if this has anything to do the my breast growth and mental changes that have been happening over the past few years, like I have some estrogen sensitivity so a little goes a long way or something? I don't have enough data to postulate, but who knows!   With weekly, subcutaneous, shots you expect to see big swings of serum level estradiol from shot to peak to trough. My doctor is interested in mid-week testing (for E and T levels only), which would be post-peak blood serum levels but they will be higher than trough. Most, if not all, resources I've seen online is to measure at trough (which I might do just to do it next time) along with a SHBG, LH, and other metrics.   This is from transfemscience.org for Estradiol valerate in oil, which is very spiky compared to some other estradiol combinations. It's also for intramuscular, which will have a slower uptake and is usually dosed in higher volume due to the slower absorption rate from muscles. They don't have subcutaneous numbers, which I would expect to see similar spikes but higher levels at similar doses due to the relatively higher absorption rate direct from fat.   Are you doing pills, shots, or patches? And when you do get your levels checked are you getting that done when your levels are lowest or some other time?
    • Willow
      Both of my parents were from the “North Shore” of Boston.  My mother Lynn and my father Swampscot.  They had an early 1900s Scots-Irish New England diet.  My sister and I were born in the 40s in Ohio well away from New England seafood and in an area where food was more German and Polish.  My first experience with liver and onions was during basic training.  They ate salt cod but never forced us to eat it same with oysters.  My dad ate oysters but my mother wouldn’t.  Anyone who ever ate an oyster can figure that one out.  I grew up eating lamb.  My wife won’t touch it. I love brazed ox tail, again no way. And the list goes on.  
    • KathyLauren
      My mother was German, so yes, I think it was a cultural thing.  If I'd known you when we were cleaning out my mother's place, I could have sent you her "threat jar". 
    • Adrianna Danielle
      Been taking it real easy.Another good neighbor of mine and his 15 year old son came over and cut down a couple dead trees on my property.Knew not to do it taking it easy.I had them put the wood near my fire pit in the back yard.Did it and happy where they put it.They knew I had stents put in and needed to take it easy
    • Ashley0616
      Wow that is a high number for Estradiol good grief! Testosterone levels are better than mine. I don't remember my Estradiol level but testosterone was 80. To me that is really high but it was in the two hundreds the check in before last one. 
    • Ivy
      I don't understand why this would make a difference being a "dad" I mean, as far as how they would grow.
    • Ashley0616
      I don't see why not. I have worn forms since I came out. 
    • MaeBe
      I have never worn breastforms, but I assume as long as they don't aggravate your nipples you could.
    • MaeBe
      Every week I've been excited to take my shot, so it's never been an issue. Yesterday, however, I woke up and started my usual "slow roll" and then suddenly realized I had breakfast plans that I had to rush out the door for. After, it was straight into work calls, and then I got the notification from the doctor about things being too high and all the while my mind had completely slipped that I needed take my shot.   Given that I am not asking for medical advice, but sharing my journey, I will note my results: Estradiol at 447 pg/mL and Testosterone was 23 ng/dL, up and down from 26 pg/mL and 526 ng/dL respectively before treatment. Almost flipped the bit! The doc would like my Estradiol closer to 300 pg/mL, so we'll see what Monday's tests state.   Oh, and I teased the dinner with old soccer teammates and never updated the thread! It went well. There were a couple funny moments. One guy, who I was worried about their response, greeted me with "Hey, you've lost some weight!" 😎 And a friend who lives near me picked me up on the way to dinner exclaimed, after we learned one of the invitees might show up with a date, "Wait! We could have brought women?!" To which I instantly responded, "You kind of did, bringing me!" Everyone got a good laugh out of that. 😁
    • Ashley0616
      To me there isn't that much difference other the measurement, which side the zipper is on and men's pants have bigger pockets. 
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...