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And cue dysphoria


DraiksWrath

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So yesterday I was out with my boyfriend at a conference he is part of the crew. As soon as he left the room all the other men in the room pounced on me introducing themselves which was fine until one got my name wrong. 

I haven’t shared here yet but I am actually a we. I have DID so we have more than one name and gender.

Yesterday Brandon was the one out and when he introduced himself to the men they mistook “Brandon” as “Brandy”. When he corrected them they just nodded and walked away then ignored us for the rest of the day. This made us feel like crap the whole time. 

Today we stayed in the hotel room while our boyfriend went to the conference by himself. We feel bad about not going with him but we don’t want to see those people again. And as a result we’re quite lonely here.

So... anyone want to chat?

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I once had a girlfriend with DID, and she said that the best thing one (someone else) could do to help was to acknowledge the DID and work with you with that in mind. But then again, I feel that goes for most illnesses, whether they be mental or physical. I don't know a whole lot about DID, but if you want some online company, just hit me up :) 

 

Other than that, I wish you the best, and hope that you take good care of yourself

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Most humans are at heart insecure. When they are faced with something outside their understanding they tend to ignore it because it makes them uncomfortable. Trans makes them uncomfortable often, adding DID increases that exponentially.

I think there are two things that can help. I live in an ultra conservative redneck, hillbilly backwoods area. I'm the only out trans person EVER in this county. So when I was transitioning and when I disclose I acknowledge that it's a weird thing and its okay if they feel confused or awkward or unsure. Saying that sets up an atmosphere of acceptance and gives them permission to feel what they can't help feeling. It lets them know you aren't going to get upset if they say or do something wrong.

The other is to realize that the reaction is a normal human reaction to something very different that they cannot really understand and not see it as personal in any way. Everyone different, everyone unusual, faces the same thing. You can't change that. But you CAN change how you react to it so that it is not a painful or harmful thing. So it doesn't cause you to withdraw and limit your life.

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Hello all,

 

Thank you for all the supportive comments. We've been spending our time playing Animal Crossing Pocket Camp since I posted this the other day.

 

untitled_by_confusedlittlekitty-dc8ld64.

 

JJ, most people we've told about the DID respond with curiosity rather than ignoring, but I don't think that was the case this time. These men wouldn't have known any of our other names so it was simply the "issue" of being trans. It was honestly something I'd expect more from the people we left behind in the US.

 

Regn, it's comforting to know we are not the only 'we' on this forum. I'm open to chatting. We haven't tried the chat feature of this site yet. We mostly use the program/app Discord for live chat. If you have a discord account and are interested in chatting on there send us a pm and I'll share our username and number.

 

McGee and MaryMary, we were in intense therapy for the traumas that caused the DID up until we moved to the Netherlands to live with our boyfriend. He is currently helping us find a new psychologist and psychiatrist to continue the treatment.

 

Once again thank you for all the support.

-Drake

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