Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Guest

All I Am

Recommended Posts

Guest

In a corner, very small, inside I hide a part of me you never see

But there's a key...it's just that no one wants to use it

or they might abuse it, take and break it, leaving nothing but

the emptiness that comes with knowing all you're showing is a shell

And who can tell there's more to you than black or white, left or right...

Morning, Noon or night, it's all the same, it's all a game, you see.

You're column A or column B and all they know is all they need to know

and that's the end, amen, and go away and don't come back another da.y

You hope and pray that things will change, but it's the strangest thing;

so many people choose to use the power of the mind to find a reason

others need to be the same as them.

You be like me or else you burn in Hell eternally

You need to see all I am.

I need to be all I am.

 

How I live and who I love and check off all of the above.

I'm just a picture in a frame, another face, another name

Another entry on a list of people who exist in little boxes,

categories you divided, just the way that you decided things should be.

But that's not me and that's not even what it's all about

We shout it from the heart and soul of who we are

Yes, I'm a star. You need to look a little farther than your narrow little

set of rules for my behavior in a situation, save your condemnation

I don't want to hear it, I don't fear it.

You don't know the slightest thing about me, you can doubt me all you want to.

I can tell you this: There's more to me than meets the eye, and if you're

feeling safe behind your little wall then maybe

You need to see all I am.

I need to be all I am.

 

 

These are actually song lyrics I wrote about six years ago.

All I Am.mp3

Share this post


Link to post
jae bear

Wow!  I love the song, I could very much see it being performed by Pink Floyd, for some reason it has the prosody that would fit a Pink Floyd Ballad, I very much like these lyrics, I think they speak to all of us and certainly to me. 

Hugs,

Jackie

Share this post


Link to post

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

  • Who's Online   13 Members, 0 Anonymous, 132 Guests (See full list)

    • Kian
    • Just Lee
    • Ellora
    • azdazed
    • MaryEllen
    • Mx.Drago
    • Jocelyn
    • A. Dillon
    • VickySGV
    • Emily michelle
    • KathrynnCox
    • Jackie C.
    • EmilyM98
  • Topics With Zero Replies

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      70,868
    • Total Posts
      642,970
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      6,868
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Rayne.Nevermore
    Newest Member
    Rayne.Nevermore
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    No users celebrating today
  • Posts

    • A. Dillon
      Sure, binding isn't exactly good for you, but the damages aren't so drastic as they seem. Personally, I think it has done me a world of good, I doubt I would be alive now without it. Often, the horror stories you hear come from excessive and prolonged use, I have been binding regularly for 7 months and have suffered very few adverse effects. Sure, it can get hard sometimes, most of the times I have had real problems is when I was being a dumb@ss and exerting myself in it. As long as you don't do too much, you should be fine.   My second point would be to think about how you really see yourself. It is not really a question of whether you want a chest or not, it is if you feel like you should have had it in the first place. It is kind of complicated, but that is what it has always come down to me. Does it feel unnatural to have a chest? Do you have to remind yourself that people see you as a girl? Do you have a hard time imagining anyone wanting to be female? Recently I truly realized this, my sister tried on my binder just for the heck of it, and she was so uncomfortable she instantly wanted to take it off. Not because it was too tight, it was actually at least a size or two too big for her, but because it felt like she was missing something. Do you have memories of people telling you, "you are a girl, this is not how you should act," and feeling a bit crushed inside, like you lost some part of you? These are all very deep questions, you don't have to have answers in two seconds, just try to consider it. 
    • Mx.Drago
      Good luck, may all go well and have a fast speedy recovery.
    • A. Dillon
      I personally use a men's compression shirt when I am not binding, it flattens your chest enough to pass while wearing a hoodie and also smooths out your curves very well. You can wear it all day, it can get a little uncomfortable around your hips sometimes but not enough for it to be a problem. Another benefit is that it is machine washable, it stretches out a bit over time so washing it will constrict it again. I have yet to find any alternative better than it, especially if you have a smaller chest, not a con in sight. The purpose is to give men and more masculine shape, exactly what we are trying to do. 
    • VickySGV
      I had the full GCS vaginaplasty but what my friends who have done bi-lateral Orchi's say is that it is more soreness for a few days than serious pain.  I can completely understand your worry about the lump there, cancer can drive you out of your mind nearly.  I had a suspicious growth in my right breast three months after my bottom surgery.  I had to have a needle biopsy and the procedure was not much but the four days between the biopsy and results drove me up a wall and across the ceiling.   I am still on Spiro, but for its original purpose of reducing body water for blood pressure.  Good luck and hope for the best.
    • ShawnaLeigh
      So the long awaited surgery to remove a lump on my left testicle is tomorrow at 1015am est.   I am getting a bi-lateral orchidectomy at the same time.   I admit to being afraid of many thing concerning this. As of now we do not know what this lump is. I’m hoping not malignant obviously but very likely with how it has reacted snd grown in such a short time.  I’m looking forward to completing the Orchidectomy and getting off Spiro.   I’m not looking forward to the pain but in the end it will be worth it.  Please wish me lunch guys and girls!  
    • Susan R
      I agree with @VickySGV on this. I thought your post was brilliant and in this sentence...”It sounds to me like you are a trauma survivor.” there is nothing you said in that statement that was offensive. Most of us know exactly what you meant. Thank you @Just Lee for taking your time to help out here. It’s really nice to have people with your kindness adding to our conversations. Thank you for joining in. I look forward to reading more of your thoughts..   My Best, Susan R🌷
    • KathrynnCox
      Thank you! That’s a story that I hope will follow for me but I highly doubt it. One of the first acts I did when we decided to move in together was to toss all my stuff in front of her. Now I get the threat of leaving me and destroying my life if I come out about this.    She terrified I’ll completely transition, at this point I just want the OK to dress up if they are out of the house on errands or something. Like when no one is home. But can’t even propose that....
    • Suzanne1
      Where I reside, no one has seen fit to enact mask executive orders, let alone legislation.  It has always been my understanding that any thing less than a N-95 mask (of a particular "flavor"; there are many types of N-95 masks) will not do much to prevent one from contracting the doomsday-cold.  It is my understanding that a non-medical grade mask will help prevent to spread of any virus from one who is already infected, but will do little else---other than hiding one's identity.   Of course, the above paragraph is only my understanding, and I cannot claim any current knowledge re: virology.  I'm sure all our citizens will adhere to the laws, legislatures, or governors of their land & will follow their instructions/orders obediently.
    • King Arthur
      Okay, so we all know how dangerous binding can be even if you’re doing it “safely”, but are there any ways to compress your chest that are safer? It doesn’t need to be entirely flat, but flat enough so that it’s not noticeable if you’re wearing a baggy hoodie or some -crap-.
    • VickySGV
      I do not see and source of offense in your earlier post.  Trauma is just a general word applied to something that causes injury or pain.  Lets leave it in the pot because it is all part of the same dysfunctional parenting that produces all the other descriptions.
    • Mx.Drago
      "I Want You"- Savage Garden  
    • Suzanne1
      Well, some Baptists called me a heathen when I was growing up, but I never claimed anything but that of a non-practicing Roman Catholic.🤔
    • Just Lee
      I never meant to give offense. Some of us have suffered abuse, neglect, and/or trauma. Some of us have anxiety, depression, PTSD and night terrors. I did want to bring together the concept that what each of us here has suffered brought us here to become survivors. If I upset anyone with my word choice, that was not my intention. While I'm fully capable of using proper terminology from the current DSM in comprehension of behavioral modification, I chose laymen's terms. 
    • NB Adult
      Suppose I could have worded it more delicately than "self pity" but picking a teammate's brains off your face is indeed very traumatic along with many other similar horrific events but eventually I chose to move on rather than to continue to relive it and yes, it is a choice.
    • Emily michelle
      Hi and welcome Katie.  I’m about the same age as you I recently came out to my wife and started hrt. My wife told me twice before that if I was transgender she would leave me. After a while I finally had a break down and she found out after that she has been supportive and said it explains a lot about me now. Your wife said she is a trans ally then maybe after it sinks in she may come around. Hiding it will just make it worse trust me I wish I had the strength to admit years ago.
  • Upcoming Events

×
×
  • Create New...