Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Regn

interview tomorrow

Recommended Posts

Regn

I have an interview tomorrow for an academic job. I’m not good at interviews at the best of times and this is far from the best time. BUT i answered the selection criteria without much effort and because of the combination of practice and academic experience that they want, in a fairly obscure area, i know the field of applicant won’t be huge. Worried by how much i want it though - hurtling towards disappointment, i fear.

 

I talked to a senior academic at a different university who has sat on selection committees for decades and asked her about risks vs necessity of disclosing gender. She recommended that I not disclose until/if I get offered the job, and then to call the head of school and say basically, “i know this isn’t relevant to my capacity to perform the role so i didn’t mention it earlier but want to be fully up front with you before I accept the offer”. It’s illegal here to discriminate on the basis of gender identity but she said she’d be very worried about unconscious bias because prejudice in this area is so prevalent. So that was kind of sobering but made me glad i asked, and i trust her judgment and experience.

 

After i left her though, i thought, what does that mean for the way i present? When I’m suited up in work clothes, strangers tend to read me as M but really i’m in that messy in-between place that just makes most people confused. I had planned to wear what I always wear to formal work events (ie suit and tie) but after talking to her, started questioning if I should change that.Eventually decided  to not actively hide anything at the interview - so wear what i want and don’t lie - because gender really isn’t relevant. But know this is a risk. 

 

I guess i’m just realising how complicated this can be - even before i get to worrying about name changes and qualifications.

 

Enough already. 7am flight tomorrow. cheers

 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Charlize

Regardless of how you decide to present best of luck.  It is certainly difficult to know that our gender shouldn't make a difference but know that somehow it does.  

Please let us know how you fare.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Share this post


Link to post
DenimAndLace

I had pretty much the same dilemma a couple weeks ago.  I am MtF and there's no way in you-know-where that I'd try to pass myself off as my gender assigned at birth but in the intimacy of an interview, for an hour, I'm probably going to leak some unconscious gender tells from my former socialization not the least of which is my voice.  I was freaked out about it during the 24 hours prior to the interview and especially in the lobby waiting but I got through it and don't think I did too bad either.  I AM very well qualified for the position but two mid-west, white privileged males are a tough audience and I couldn't tell for sure if they read me or not.  I haven't heard good or bad news from them but I've prepared myself for disappointment and I'm continuing to look.  One almost has to do that though.  If you think about it, several people apply and only one gets the job.  The odds are stacked against you before you even apply.

Share this post


Link to post
Jani

Best of luck!!

Jani

Share this post


Link to post
Regn

well I’m pretty sure I f*cked it up. Nothing to do with gender though, I guess that’s something. I failed all on my own merits lol

 

Hope you fare better Lace

Share this post


Link to post
Jani

Well even if it didn't go well you have a baseline for what you need or the types of questions asked.

 

Jani

Share this post


Link to post
Charlize

It could easily be that it simply wasn't the right job for you.  Don't give up hope.  Hopefully

you will ace the next one.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize 

Share this post


Link to post
DenimAndLace

So I found out yesterday that I didn't get the job.  Point for point I was perfectly qualified and the region where I live is desperate for workers so it's hard to imagine why, if you're qualified with a good work history, you wouldn't be hired.  I get gendered both ways, I was interviewed by two white, privileged males and I DIDN'T talk about my gender yet I suspect they may have read me. I'm wondering what the rest of you think about a very polite follow up call to the main person who interviewed me to ask why I was not chosen.  And, again, in a polite way, to ask them if they were fearful that my gender might have been hard for their customers to accept.  In no way would I be accusatory or sound bitter.  Just a professional discussion where we DO talk about the elephant in the room.  I'd like to know to help me decide what to do and say in future interviews. 

Share this post


Link to post
Annie

I've hired a lot of people over the years and have never had any problem with people calling me and asking what they may be able to improve upon next time. I've done the same thing myself and in at least one case, that conversation really helped me figure out where I needed to do some additional work and training.

 

I have had the occasional person call me and word their question poorly so it sounded like an accusation. Not knowing your experience, it very well could be discrimination and I've seen plenty of people come up with what seem to be reasonable reasons for not wanting to hire someone when those reasons were not there for other candidates. But regardless, I suspect you are right that if you just ask

 

I would ask something like this:

"I really enjoyed meeting with you yesterday (or whatever) and I am still very interested in your company / organization. I would be interested in applying for a position in the future if one comes up. Could you tell me what I could do to improve my chances in the future?"

Share this post


Link to post
Regn

I would ask, Lace. I didn't get mine either but when they called to tell me, they offered to give me feedback. I said no thanks because I already knew how I'd screwed up but if you don't, then I would definitely ask. 

 

As for the gender thing, is it legal to not hire someone because "my gender might have been hard for their customers to accept"? Because if it's not (it's not here) you may not get an honest answer. 

 

I have an application in now for a poorly paid job in the redneck country town I used to live in. I'm almost certain I'll get it but they're wanting to call me to check I understand what they job entails (I'm way overqualified for it). I'm avoiding picking up when they call because I can't decide whether I should withdraw or not and I'm worried they'll offer it to me and I won't know what to say. Do you hold out for something better or take what you can and make do? I really hate decisions like that.  

Share this post


Link to post
DenimAndLace

They can't legally discriminate but there's nothing to stop them from naming some other reason for not hiring me.  If they did read me and didn't hire me for that reason, they probably wont admit it which is why I decided not to call them.  There's nothing worse, in my opinion, than looking for a new job.  Job descriptions always look to me, like Jesus himself wouldn't be qualified.  Then, for those who apply (many) only one is chosen.  The cards are stacked against a positive outcome.  It has to be one of the most discouraging thing a person has to do. 

 

Thanks for the responses @Regn & @Annie

Share this post


Link to post
Regn

I agree @DenimAndLace I hate it so much. And thinking back, I don't remember ever getting a job through that method. All the jobs I've had have come about through more informal means initially. If that doesn't change it rules out whole industries though who only employ through formal processes.

 

I've decided to withdraw my application for the job in bogan-ville. I might end up homeless but I'm going to stay here and get my surgery in December. Then I'll worry about work. Too much stress right now. 

 

Hope something works out for you soon.

Share this post


Link to post

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

  • Who's Online   11 Members, 0 Anonymous, 90 Guests (See full list)

    • Dana Michelle
    • SL
    • Jani
    • RunValRun
    • KathyLauren
    • cybreraphael
    • Joanna D
    • claire1000
    • Michellle
    • Becoming Jordan
    • Kim Lang
  • Topics With Zero Replies

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      71,635
    • Total Posts
      651,900
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      7,221
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Adelaide
    Newest Member
    Adelaide
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    No users celebrating today
  • Posts

    • Jani
      Yes we endured an eleven day ice storm and the resulting outages years ago.  Furnace, water pump, water heater and refrigerator are all critical!  I have a transfer switch that allows me to swap over to the generator safely.  I'm not a prepper either but some things are a given when you live where I do.  
    • KathyLauren
      @Jani, I am glad you were well-prepared for the power outage.  Out on the west coast, a few years ago, we endured an eight-day outage caused by a major storm.  That motivated me to get a generator.    I made sure both that house and our current house are wired so that the generator can power anything on the premises.  Not all at the same time, of course, but fridge, freezer, well pump and the controls for the oil-fired furnace can all run off it, as well as the computer and the TV.    I don't consider myself a "prepper", but I do believe in being prepared for some of the more likely events, like storms.
    • claire1000
      The only person other than my therapist I told was my primary care physician, I new that because of other medical conditions she would see the hormone therapy in my blood work.I wanted to see how I felt on the hormones before I told family.At about 6 months my eldest daughter said there was something going on with me and wanted to know if I was ill, she said I looked different to her.What I had not realized that with prior weight loss the hormone therapy had started to change my facial appearance somewhat.She was the first that I told followed by her sister and my 2 sons.The girls have been wonderful but the sons not so much.But now living full time everyone knows this is going to be permanent, and whatever time I have left I am going to live as Claire.
    • Michellle
      Oh ok, that sounds easy. How do you record your files? In the studio or do you have your own recording software?
    • SL
      Congratulations! Good luck with the new path! I'm sure you'll do great!
    • Jani
      Yes our hair tends to grow dependent upon a number of factors including our genetic makeup.  Here are the stages of growth.   Anagen is the active growth phase of hair follicles during which the root of the hair is dividing rapidly, adding to the hair shaft. During this phase the hair grows about 1 cm every 28 days. Scalp hair stays in this active phase of growth for 2–7 years; this period is genetically determined.   The catagen phase is a short transition stage that occurs at the end of the anagen phase. It signals the end of the active growth of a hair. The hair detaches from its blood supply during the catagen phase. This phase lasts for about two to three weeks while a club hair is formed.   The telogen phase is the resting phase of the hair follicle. When the body is subjected to extreme stress, as much as 70 percent of hair can prematurely enter the telogen phase and begin to fall, causing a noticeable loss of hair. This condition is called telogen effluvium.
    • Jani
      @KathyLauren That is so nice that you can effectively communicate about what you love and that people respond.   Keep going!   With the storm running up the East coast we had a period of high winds and rain in the early evening.  Lights in the house flickered a few times but it seemed we were safe.  But at 8pm the winds kicked up again and power went out!  I decided against lighting candles and went to bed at 9pm.  At 11:30 it was still dark, although the moon was full and it was very bright outside.  As it had been close to 4 hours I was concerned about my refrigerator.     I got dressed and went out to the garage to connect and fire up the generator.  I pulled it out and connected the underground cable to the house.  Thankfully it still had some gas in the tank.  I went out to buy more fuel, but it was already 12:30am and I didn't know how extensive the outage was.  Thankfully I saw the streetlight was on about a quarter mile from the house and I was able to find fuel at a local station that is 24hour.      After topping off the tank I sat in my car to cool off and listen to the radio.  About 1:30 I saw a power company truck pass by looking at the overhead cables.  I went to bed and awoke at 5am to see the power had been restored.  Great!  I went out to the garage in my night shirt to turn off the generator.  We don't generally loss power in the summer but the winds were really strong.  Thank goodness for the power crews!!  
    • Jani
      Kylie I hope it all went well and you are resting comfortably when you read this.  We'll all thinking of you.   Hugs, Jani
    • Jani
      Wonderful News Emily!!  I hope it works out for you and you find your new passion!
    • Jani
      Hello Rory and welcome!  Take you time to sort out who you are.  In the meantime, please join in.   Jani
    • Jani
      Hello HollyNoel and welcome!  Jackie's site has been very interesting, she's so positive.  Great news about seeing a therapist.  As to makeup, try to experiment and remember less is more!  Please join in the conversation!! Jani
    • Jani
      Its looking much better now.  
    • Jani
      In regard to "Secret 'o Life" isn't it amazing how some songs really hit the point and speak to us in a deep manner?   I've always loved the positive message in "Shower the People". 
    • AcanOfBeans
      Here's how it looks today. Im bruised cause I scratch in my sleep and haven't found a way to stop that aside from taking like 4 benadryl before bed and putting on a bunch of hydrocortisone. Luckily my scars don't itch because I have nerve damage and can't feel them.
    • AcanOfBeans
      I've been taking benadryl but it's only helped for about 2 hours before I'm itchy again. I got stuff to take an oatmeal bath and that had helped a bit as well as piling on hydrocortisone whenever it starts to feel itchy. I'm assuming I'm allergic to one of the flowers cause I know I have no issue with mineral oil (I use scalp oil and that's the main ingredient). It seems like the hives are starting to go away little by little, the other day was the worst with it but now it's calming down a bit. The doctors here are useless so I'm just gonna continue with home treatment.
  • Upcoming Events

×
×
  • Create New...