Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Post-op top surgery


ChickenLittle

Recommended Posts

I'm a couple days out from peri-areolar top surgery! The first day I felt great and couldn't stop smiling. Today I'm still in good spirits but feeling very fragile and sick of these drains. I feel so lucky to have my friends and family here to help.

 

If I'm 100% honest, the week leading up to surgery was terrifying. I was so scared of surgery that I thought maybe I was making a mistake. Maybe I would regret It. Maybe I'd chicken out at the last minute and make a fool of myself. Maybe I just didn't try hard enough to be happy living as a woman. But as soon as I woke up I knew that this was the right choice; this is me. I am whole. I can't wait to heal enough to go outside and let the sunlight touch my chest. Every day that has gone by since I started my transition, my body feels a little bit more like home.

36299999_1979831805679633_765017259776147456_o.jpg

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

 I am so very proud of you !  You look amazing! And those tubes will be gone soon enough ! Decisions like these are always so hard, but you are an extremely intelligent and brave man for taking control of your life, that sunlight is going to come soon enough, and you deserve every bright cheerful ray you receive.  Recovery from surgery is definitely a tough process, I’ve been through a few myself and can tell you the time you spend recovering is not pleasant, but the results will be worth it, worth more than you could even fathom at this very moment. And you are such a brave and strong man, we truly need more men like you in this world,  I cannot express enough how amazing you are, and the inspiration you provide to me personally!  I look forward to your future that will be undoubtedly filled with many Captain Kirk like moments were your shirt will become useless!  I just don’t want to be the one in the red shirt when those moments happen!

 Hugs, 

 Jackie 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

That smile says it all!!!!  You look great Dude! 
 

Jani

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

I think its time to change that moniker from ChickenLittle to something more appropriate, like Big Rooster!!!
 

Jani

Link to comment
6 hours ago, Jani said:

I think its time to change that moniker from ChickenLittle to something more appropriate, like Big Rooster!!!
 

Jani

Haha, thank you! I've been thinking of changing it, so people have an easy name to refer to me by. I'm still ridiculously small though, even clothes made especially for short men are too big for me ;) 

Link to comment

Congratulations! I am so thrilled to see the big giant smile on your face!

One of my favorite parts of going to the trans march in Portland a few weeks ago was seeing all the trans men without their shirts. As we marched, more and more took off their shirts. It was so lovely to see the smiles get bigger as their pride filled them. You remind me of that time with your amazing photo. Thanks so much for sharing!

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator
On 7/2/2018 at 7:20 PM, ChickenLittle said:

I'm still ridiculously small though, even clothes made especially for short men are too big for me

Ok this is not uncommon.  I was very short and small (now I'm tall and small) so I shopped in the Teen or Young Men's section for shirts and slacks for seemingly forever.  Think of it like Juniors section for guys.  Don't be embarrassed about where you shop.  It doesn't make any difference as long as it fits.  And many of the styles will be up to date also as younger guys do not want to look uncool.  

 

Also, you can get slacks and jeans taken in and hemmed for low cost.  They will look so much better.  

 

Happy shopping!!!!

Jani

Link to comment

Quick update: my left nipple isn't healing quite right and it's got me pretty nervous. I sent a photo to my surgeon and he's having me come in on Monday so he can check it out. He seemed a little concerned but not worried and he still checked the "within normal limits" box in his response, so I'm holding on to that. It's either just scabbing or impeded blood flow, so that's a bit scary. About 3/4 of it is super dark, pretty much black. I didn't get grafts, so it's really uncommon for it to look this way. Wish me luck! I'm looking forward to a day where this is all just a memory and my chest is fully healed. 

Link to comment
  • Admin
3 hours ago, ChickenLittle said:

"within normal limits" box in his response, so I'm holding on to that. It's either just scabbing or impeded blood flow, so that's a bit scary.

 

It does not matter which of our surgeries we have there will be moments when we scare ourselves with how things look.  For my first few months I was afraid of what I would see every time I looked at myself, but it has all turned out fine.  Not the sight I imagined but it was good in the end.

 

Link to comment

Thanks, Vicky. This is my first surgery so it's all new to me. I'm trying to stay positive!

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

I was afraid to look also!    Have faith in your doctor's experience.  I know I did and I am beyond happy with my results.   Each of us is different and while they understand how our body "should" react to the surgery and plan for this, it is ultimately our body that does the healing at it's own pace.  

 

Take a deep breath!  Ahhh.

 

Jani

Link to comment

Another update: spoke with my surgeon and I've got a really rare complication that he seems very surprised by. Basically, my left nipple has very limited blood supply and a lot of tissue has died. I'm guessing one of my arterioles was in a weird place and accidentally got cut during surgery. He told me he thinks in about 4 weeks the dead stuff will detach on its own and we'll see what's underneath and proceed from there. He seems optimistic that there's healthy tissue in there because there's a pink area in one corner and I have some pain response in the area. 

 

I'm trying to be patient but I'm feeling very scared and discouraged. I love my results otherwise, for the most part, but I'm afraid I'll have a lot of asymmetry in my nipple color/size/protrusion/etc and I might need another surgery later to correct for that (I hope I can, at least). My surgeon told me we'll cross that bridge if it comes to it (in about 6 months). 

Link to comment
  • Admin

It took me over 9 months to get rid of some of my internal swelling, and for nerves that were dissociated from the tissue they were "reporting" to my brain to get re-mapped.  It was another three months before some other healing from nerves affecting specific sensations  was completed.  It was worth the time it took though, but I can empathize with the worry and concern and likely pain  that you are having with this.  Your doctor is wise in yielding to time, the greatest healer.  It does sound like you are under good care.

Link to comment

New update: My stitches are starting to dissolve and the bad surface tissue is just barely beginning to flake off at the corner that looks healthiest. The skin underneath looks normal there, so that's a hopeful sign. I'm going to keep writing updates because it helps me process and keep track of things and also for a reference in case anybody else has this same issue with their own surgery. I've spent hours looking online and couldn't find anybody with a case that matched mine in severity. I'm thinking a likely outcome will be healthy,  normal looking tissue on one half of the nipple blending into fairly obvious scar tissue on the other side. If I end up with that I'll be happy and it should be easy to conceal with medical tattooing if I want to. Hopefully I won't have a big crater on one side, though there's a good chance I might. Please keep your fingers crossed for me! 

Link to comment

I have my fingers and toes crossed for you! The waiting game is tough, but it seems like you're taking the right approach to it. And thanks for continuing to post updates!

Link to comment
  • Admin

It can seem that undissolved sutures hold in the bad stuff, but when they are out of the way swelling goes down like a punctured inner tube and good stuff pops right out at you.  Who knows but you may go down in medical history.  The skin pigment may take a while to get back to normal color, but unless your family has a history of bad scarring you will be fine.  Your "plan 'B'" with the medical tattooing is a good answer if needed.

Link to comment
  • 3 weeks later...

Time for another update-- last night I got a scare when I accidentally bumped that big scab and felt it come loose. I'm still fairly numb so I flew out of bed to assess the damage, only to find that there was none to speak of. I can see that there appears to be a healthy nipple under there (at least the part I can see) and there was no bleeding. I bet the scab will detach completely soon! 

Link to comment

That sounds like good news! Must have been pretty scary, though, until you could check it out and see that it was OK.

Julie

Link to comment
  • 8 months later...

Belated congrats on your surgery! You'll be coming up on your first anniversary for it soon; how has it been healing? Did you end up having any problems on the left side? 

Link to comment
  • 3 weeks later...

Hi there! 

 

It ended up healing (mostly) okay! I did lose some tissue and have a little visible scarring, but it's really not bad. I'll be going in next month for a revision, but it's actually to address the other side of my chest, where the nipple sticks out further than I'd like, and to do a tiny bit of lipo for chest contouring. 

Link to comment
  • 1 month later...

Got my revision yesterday! Feeling great so far and the bandages come off on Monday. I have a bit of swelling where they did the contouring but overall it's looking good. Fingers crossed for the reveal next week!

20190618_162018.jpg

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Best of luck in healing.  I hope all is well.  

 

Jani

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   6 Members, 0 Anonymous, 199 Guests (See full list)

    • Sally Stone
    • Susie
    • VickySGV
    • violet r
    • Adrianna Danielle
    • Charlize
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.7k
    • Total Posts
      768.3k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,024
    • Most Online
      8,356

    JamesyGreen
    Newest Member
    JamesyGreen
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Dillon
      Dillon
    2. Kaylee888
      Kaylee888
    3. lily100
      lily100
      (39 years old)
    4. Luce
      Luce
      (44 years old)
    5. Luke.S
      Luke.S
  • Posts

    • MaeBe
      Thank you for continuing to share your story, Sally!   Willa sounded like a grand friend, I'm sorry for your loss. :(
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Not all conservatives are for Trump.  I am far from thrilled he is running.  Just wanted to make that clear.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Anybody willing to present the case for Trump? Any conservatives out there?
    • MaeBe
      Two words(?): Project 2025   Please provide links to the "political calculus" referred to, I'd be interested to know where this is coming from. It seems odd that anyone would be advocating to vote in a President that has stated that he will try to use the federal government to go after LGBTQ+ people because voting back Biden, that is not doing that, might cause some state legislatures to put forth more discriminatory laws.   LGBTQ+ people are not safe in a MAGA future.
    • Ashley0616
      It's awesome that you have had such a great friend in your life! I could only imagine what losing felt like to you. It's neat that you worked for the airlines. Did you take advantage of the space availability fights? My dad worked for Northwest and always flew every single summer except one where we drove from north Mississippi to Phoenix, AZ. My parents agreed to never do that again lol. 
    • Ashley0616
      The trans community won't be good under Trump at all. Biden is the one who has done more for the trans community than any other presidents. Last time Trump was in office he was at an LGBTQ rally and his support went quickly away from us because the majority of the voters are anti trans. He is going to get rid of our rights and also come after the rest of LGBTQ.  I don't know where you heard we would be better under Trump.    Trump unveils sweeping attack on trans rights ahead of 2024 (axios.com)   Trump Promises to Go After Trans People if Re-Elected (vice.com)   Trump promises to ban transgender women from sports if re-elected (nbcnews.com)
    • Sally Stone
      Post 7 “The Pittsburgh Years” When I retired from the Army, we moved to Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania because I had been hired by US Airways to work in their flight training department.  The transition to civilian life was a bit of an adjustment, but I never really looked back.  At the same time, I was excited at the prospect of having more Sally time. But with work and two teenage boys in the house, getting to be Sally was a challenge.    The biggest issue in this regard were my sons, as they didn’t know about my feminine side.  My wife and I discussed, in great detail, whether or not to tell them.  If they had known about Sally, it would have been much easier to actually be Sally when I wanted to.  But I still didn’t know exactly where my transgender journey was going to take me, and this uncertainty was the primary reason my wife and I decided it wasn’t the right time to tell them about Sally.  Except for the convenience it would afford me, we didn’t think it was fair to burdened them with such a sensitive family secret if it wasn’t absolutely necessary.  If at some point things changed and it looked like I might be heading towards transition, my wife and I agreed we would revisit our decision.   Despite having to tiptoe around the boys I was able, with my wife often running interference for me, to significantly increase my girl time.  The nature of my variable work schedule meant that often days off occurred during the week when the boys were in school, and on those days, I took full advantage of the time.  Additionally, I had discovered a new trans friend through a local support group, and my wife, ever and always accommodating, ensured I had time for outings with my new friend.    Willa, my new friend, quickly became my best friend, and after only a short time, she and my wife became quite close as well.  With Willa’s help, I would soon discover that Pittsburgh was a very trans friendly city.  Together, she and I made the town our own.  We attended the theater, the symphony, we went out to dinner regularly, and I think we visited every museum in the city.  With Willa’s support and friendship, I was actually becoming quite the girl about town.    Willa and I had a lot in common.  We loved to shop, we had similar feminine styles, and we had similar views and feelings about being trans.  In fact, our frequent and deep discussions about transgender issues helped me begin to understand my transgender nature.  Having Willa as a springboard for all topics transgender, was probably as effective as regularly visiting a therapist.  I would never discount anyone’s desire to seek professional help, but having an unbiased confidant, can also be an effective method for self-discovery.    Exploring the city as Sally and spending time with Willa was instrumental in helping me understand my transgender nature, and would begin shaping my transgender objective.  My feelings about the kind of girl I was and where I wanted to go began to solidify.  Being out and socializing as Sally in a big city like Pittsburgh, taught me I could express my femininity without issue.  I honestly felt confident I could live my life as a woman; however, remaining completely objective, I just couldn’t see giving up the life I’d built as a man.   At that time, I was being heavily influenced by the concept of the gender binary, which had me thinking I had to choose between being a man or being a woman.  It was Willa who reminded me there were no rules requiring gender identity to be binary.  During one of our deep discussions, she posited the idea of enjoying both genders, something she was doing, and a concept that made a lot of sense to me.  I was already living the life of a part-time woman, so I simply started paying more attention to how that was making me feel.    One characteristic that was dominating my feminine self-expression (and it continues to this day) was that when I was Sally, I was “all in.”  When I became Sally, it was such a complete transformation that I truly felt like a woman.  The feeling was powerful, and if I had to describe it another way, I’d say it was akin to an actor, so into the part, they actually become the character they are portraying.  That was me, and I discovered that this level of depth was extremely fulfilling, and that feeling tended to last long after transitioning back to my male persona.  Part-time womanhood it seemed, was actually working for me.    Eventually, a job change forced me to move away from Pittsburgh, but the enlightenment I experienced while living there has shaped the nature of my bi-gender personality to this day.  Even after leaving, Willa and I remained the best of friends.  We had many more adventures, some of which I will detail in later posts.  Sadly, Willa passed away two-years ago after contracting a prolonged illness.  Her loss was hard to take and I miss her dearly.  However, I have so many fond memories of our times together, and because her support helped shape me, she lives on in my heart.   Hugs,   Sally
    • missyjo
      thank you dear. I'm constantly working at adjusting n writing off other people's judgment or input.   thank you n good luck
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Them's fighting words, but I intend to discuss this respectfully, calmly and so forth, in accordance with the forum rules.   Considering the one issue below in isolation:   There is a political calculus that trans folk may be better off under Trump than under Biden.  The argument goes that Biden has created such a backlash by moving so far to the left that red states, in particular, are reacting with a swarm of laws that negatively impact trans folk.  Some of his actions strike many people as clumsily forcing unwanted regulation on people, and some of his appointments, such as the luggage stealing bigender individual, have not helped advance trans folk but rather the reverse.  In a second term Biden would make things worse for trans folk because of the backlash and resentment his policies would create.    Trump likely would have negative impacts to trans folk, as he did in his first term with respect to the military, so it is a set of tradeoffs as to which is worse.   Thoughts?
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Can you dress androgynously? 
    • Ashley0616
    • Abigail Genevieve
      There are trans folk who pass better than some cis people.  People usually aren't on the lookout for those who are cross dressed.  As long as there are no multiple screaming signals and you don't draw attention to yourself you can probably pass better than you think. For example, if you walk into a bank in heels, however, and you DON'T know how to walk in heels, you will attract the attention of a security guard, especially if you are acting nervous. If you wear flats and just go to the bank and do your business like anyone else, it is likely no one will notice, except that there was a customer who was taller than most women are, but then there are tall women, and tall, broad shouldered woman.  I made the mistake years ago of thinking I had outed such, and knew she was a he.  Later I learned she had five kids, and her husband was bigger than she was.  Ooops.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I don't know much about CNAs.  They report to an RN, right?  Can you somehow bring this up to the RN in a way that does not get your CNA mad at you? I'm not saying you should, but maybe that is a good course of action.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      This is the thing.  A month ago tomorrow is when I stopped wearing m clothing.  Today I feel great.  I do not have dysphoria when I am dressed as and I move as a woman.  I was just thinking about that because I was wondering if I would or will get hit with a wave of "you don't have dysphoria so you might as well dress like a guy. Less hassle with your wife."  Not that she is aware, to my knowledge, that these androgynous clothes are women's.  No desire to "flip", no feeling of need to, just happy identifying as female.  Speaking, in my deep guy voice, with female voice patterns, doing the feminine gestures that come naturally and without exaggeration and at peace.
    • Birdie
      Yes, my brother was born lactating due to absorbing hormones from my mum.    Of course she isn't a nurse, she is a CNA. She should however still have general medical knowledge.
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...