Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

I'm gonna learn MAKEUP


AsTheCrow

Recommended Posts

I read a while ago about some free makeup classes for trans folks that Sephora was doing, but at the time there weren't any such events at my local Sephora. I checked again today and HOLY CROW they're doing one in four weeks,  and you better believe I signed right up!

 

I promise to report back after the event, to share my experience, thoughts, and ¿¿¿maybe a picture???

 

Anyway, I'm super excited!

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Great!  I hope you enjoy yourself and learn something too! 

 

Jani

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

That sounds good!

 

Make full use of the opportunity. As Jani said - enjoy yourself :)

 

Tracy

Link to comment

I was walking past a Sephora yesterday (I never dare go inside, because it’s so intimidating and overwhelming) a few minutes before opening, and there in the window at their beauty station was a sister getting made up! What is this secret Sunday morning trans makeover at my local mall??? Gotta learn more...

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Marlin, give them a call to inquire!  You might find it to be fun to go and get a makeover. 

 

Jani

Link to comment
  • Admin
20 minutes ago, Marbabar said:

What is this secret Sunday morning trans makeover at my local mall??? Gotta learn more...

 

Sephora is VERY trans friendly, and many stores have make-up artists who are Trans.  I was recently a contact person at my LGBT center for some of their stores in my area who were putting on special Classes for Trans people.  Ulta Cosmetics also has many Trans employees and "consultants" as well.

 

Sephora"s Classes for Trans folks (yes Trans Guys too) are listed on their main website, it is a national thing.

Link to comment

Yeah Sephora is very friendly with the trans community. There was literally a line out the door in Boston on pride day. 

Is is intimidating though. More because of all the youn teens in there for me than anything. I say to myself all the time. “Really!? You’re afraid of 14 year old girls?!” Still haven’t gotten past it though. But it’s coming. ?

Link to comment

14 year old girls can be brutal! Don't minimize their potential for cruelty.  ?

 

Link to comment
  • Admin
47 minutes ago, SugarMagnolia said:

14 year old girls can be brutal! Don't minimize their potential for cruelty.  ?

 

But every now and then, they can really be great, and they are turning the corner that way daily!!

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

A Pack?   ??????????  Kirsten, they're not wolves!!  

 

They're just girls starting puberty, like you!?

Jani 

Link to comment
  • Admin
3 hours ago, Kirsten said:

a pack stay back!!

 

Cub Scouts are in Packs, but they dont like make up!!

Link to comment
  • 4 weeks later...

I had my makeup class yesterday! It was informative and I feel like I got my first glimpse of myself as a Real Woman (meaning an actual trans woman as opposed to an androgynous nonbinary person). I can't say the whole experience was 100% positive, but maybe 72% which is still pretty good.

 

I will write a description of my experience and post it here, along with a picture of myself.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

 I’m really interested in these classes myself, I can’t wait to see your description of what went on in there !

 Hugs, 

Jackie

Link to comment

I ended up writing WAY MORE than I was planning to. Hang on to your hat, I'm about to find out if there's a post size limit.

Link to comment

After I signed up for the Sephora makeup class for trans folks, I went scouring the internet for people’s experiences of the class. At first I couldn’t find much, but after a few weeks went by, I started seeing more people talking about their experiences. Most people had very positive things to say.

 

A few people didn’t have great things to say, but that is to be expected, I think; the classes are run in different locations by different people, with different groups of attendees. That’s a lot of variables to expect a 100% experience across the board.

 

I’m a worrier, though, so seeing even a few negative reviews made me very nervous about what I was walking into. It’s just who I am.

 

For one, some people had talked about getting misgendered by the Sephora employees, even after providing their names and pronouns. I knew that being misgendered might be upsetting and distracting for me, so I decided I would go to the class as feminine as I could muster. So I spent the month before the class assembling the outfit I would wear. My first full outfit of women’s clothes.

 

Here’s the deal. I’m a fat person. It’s been several months since I had the nerve to weigh myself, but I’m probably just under 300 pounds right now, at 5 feet 11 inches tall. My size, combined with my ignorance of women’s clothes and my tiny clothing budged enforced by poverty, made assembling this outfit quite the challenge.

 

BUT I DID IT. I found a skirt, top, and cardigan which looked nice together and fit my body. I found tights and shoes. I planned to do my hair so it would be long and curly and pretty. I would get a super close shave that morning. I was determined not to be misgendered.

 

But my shoes never came in, and I didn’t have any shoes that would work with the skirt. So I wore the top and cardigan with my blue jeans from the men’s department at Walmart. And my old leather everyday men’s shoes. This was a blow. Also, I was running late that morning, and though I did get a nice close shave, I also sliced myself open with my fancy new safety razor. I was moving too fast and got careless.

 

So when I left my house, it was in men’s jeans and shoes, with a big ugly cut on my face like a huge cat scratch. But also wearing my fave earrings, with hair on point. All this is to say that even before I got to the class, I was upset and nervous. I didn’t look how I wanted to look and I was concerned I might be misgendered.

 

My class was at the Sephora in the Park Plaza Mall in Little Rock, Arkansas, at 9:30 on a Sunday morning. I got to the mall early and circled the parking lot a couple of times before settling into a parking spot. I sat in my car and watched YouTube videos on my phone in a vain attempt to take my mind off my anxiety. And, eventually, I entered the mall and went to the store about 10 minutes early, as requested by the email that Sephora had sent me.

 

I got to the store at the same time as another trans woman, maybe in her mid or late sixties. There were people inside. I tried the door and it was locked. The people inside gestured for me to wait a second, and one of them left, presumably to fetch a key. The woman next to me tried the door herself. It was still locked, which was apparently a surprise to her. I thought some unpleasant things about her and felt guilty. Then they employees unlocked the door and we entered.

 

We were not the first. There were already a couple of trans girls there, presumably in their early or mid twenties. I would have felt old if it weren’t for the lady I entered with. The employees were all young and attractive. I felt awkward. The older lady was very boisterous and inserted herself into conversations in a way that I disliked. I sat on a stool and waited for class to start. Another trans girl arrived, looking very young. A couple of young people, possibly a cis man and woman, came in. As did another cis man and woman, but not together. There were nine students, five of us apparently trans, and three employees, all apparently cis.

 

The students filled out a short survey about our skin and makeup needs, got scanned by a little camera thing to find color matches, and the employees selected an appropriate foundation and concealer for each of us. One by one we chose stations at a row of tables in the back of the store. I chose first. Then the older lady I entered with chose the station across from me. She used to be a truck driver. She used to be in the military. She kept talking to me but I was too nervous to engage in conversation. I think I managed to politely excuse myself, and wandered around the store until class was starting.

 

The employees asked us to introduce ourselves. The older lady told us her life story. Everyone else said our names, how much we knew about makeup and maybe a pronoun or where we came from. The young people who I read as a cis man and woman were roommates but did not mention why they chose to come. The young cis woman said she has a dear friend who is getting into drag but couldn’t make it to the class.

 

The young cis man was apparently a brand rep for Urban Decay who knew a lot about skincare and makeup. He said he used to be roommates with one of the employees. He didn’t seem to take notice of anyone but himself and his friends who worked there. His station was right next to mine and I felt embarrassed by my lack of knowledge when he so clearly knew what he was doing.

 

Throughout the whole class, I didn’t notice anyone being misgendered, but the employees did often refer to us collectively as ‘guys’. That doesn’t bother me, but I do know it bothers some people.

 

We were asked for a volunteer to be a model for the employees to demonstrate on. Most of us seemed nervous or shy. The older lady volunteered at the same time as one of the younger trans women, but I don’t think anybody but me noticed that, because the older lady was so loud.

 

I was sweating with nerves, and because I’m a fat person in a cardigan standing at a table under bright lights. I worried the makeup would just slide off my face. I put my hair back into a ponytail and never took it back out, even for selfies later in the day. The employees taught us about skin care.

 

We were advised to use a cleanser, an exfoliator, an eye cream, a moisturizer, and sunscreen. One of the employees was a skin care expert and demonstrated on the older lady. The rest of us followed along with products they supplied. After all of that, my face felt tingly and wet. One of them asked me how my skin felt. I did not answer, “Tingly and wet.” I answered, “Good!” I still worried the makeup would slide off my face.

 

Then another employee stepped up to teach us about complexion makeup. She taught us to use primer, color correction, foundation, concealer, and setting powder and/or spray.

 

I applied the products. I felt like I was doing a pretty good job. The lady thought I didn’t need color correction. I thought she was crazy. I had a blue shadow in my beard area and several red areas elsewhere in my face. She thought the foundation and concealer would be enough for those areas and I trusted her. After I got everything on, I decided she was maybe correct. My cut was no longer red, though you could still see the shape of it. My red spots were gone. I do think the foundation was a little too dark, or too orange. But it did have a nice natural look.

 

I still thought I could see a shadow in my beard area. I made a note to learn how to do beard color correction on YouTube.

 

That was everything we were scheduled to learn, but we still had quite a while before the store was to open, so they decided to teach us bronzer, blush, and highlighter. Some of us decided we were happy with just the complexion products. Some decided to keep going. I was on the fence, but I decided I was there to learn, so I went for it.

 

My complexion looked pretty good. I was happy with where I was. The lady told me where to apply bronzer. I did so, and immediately a black smudge appeared on my skin. The lady thought there was some sort of product on the brush, so she brought me a new brush while I cleaned off the smudge and reapplied foundation there.

 

I tried the bronzer again. The same black smudge appeared on my forehead. The lady thought maybe some dye from the brush was coming off because I was “sweating a little”. My panic sweat was apparently so acidic I was melting their brushes. Wow. She fetched me a different kind of brush while I cleaned the spot and reapplied foundation again.

 

I applied bronzer where she showed me. I legit could not see it but she said it looked great. By this point everyone else was done and watching me. She showed me where to apply blush. That went okay, but I was using the wrong type of brush stroke so she held my brush hand to teach me how to apply. I felt embarrassed, but I could see the blush and it looked nice.

 

She taught me where to apply highlighter. Apparently while putting it on the brush, I also picked up some blush from the palette. When I went to highlight, I also created a pink spot where one didn’t belong. She showed me how to blend that out. It helped a little but I had a bit of pink in a weird spot for the rest of the day.

 

She said I looked great. She was very kind. I was feeling embarrassed by my poor performance and sweaty face. But I kept looking in the mirror. I have never seen myself like that. My makeup looked natural, looked professional, looked like me.

 

Despite myself, I had really learned a lot, and applied a mostly-okay face of makeup. The employees gave each of us a little makeup bag with some free products and samples inside. The older trans lady also tried to take all of the makeup brushes at her station. I wondered if anyone would notice, but I didn’t say anything. Someone must have noticed, because she came back later and put them back, not looking terribly happy.

 

Everyone stayed and chatted. I was feeling like I needed to get out of there. I was out of excuses for not talking to people. One of the employees let me out. I went to my car and sat there with the air conditioner blasting until my face was dry again. I drove back to my home town.

 

I parked in a shopping center and went through my gift bag. It contained a nude Urban Decay lipstick, an eyeliner, a mascara, a brow cream and brush, a blush, a makeup brush, two eye creams, a cleanser, and a perfume.

 

I applied the eyeliner and mascara. I knew how to use these from my days in stage makeup. I did my brows. One of them looked very nice. The other looked very inelegant. I applied the lipstick inexpertly, but it was a nice color. I even put on the perfume. Then I couldn’t stop staring at myself. Wow. It was obviously not great work, but I could see real, honest-to-God potential. Who was the woman in the mirror? She was me.

 

I took some selfies in the car but was dissatisfied with them. So I went to the cemetery. Where else? I took some selfies in the cemetery and kept staring at myself. My roommate wasn’t home, but her dad was there doing laundry. I didn’t want to go in with my makeup with him there, but I was tired and hungry and ready to go home, so I just did it. If he noticed my makeup he didn’t say anything.

 

I continued to look at myself in the mirror. Then I washed it all off and took a nap. It was a trying morning, but a rewarding one. I’m glad I did it. I don’t have any money, but I do have an Ulta gift card. Maybe I can find some serviceable products at Ulta to practice with.

 

Despite my own personal issues, I do recommend you attend one of these events if there’s one near you, and if you need a Skincare And Complexion Makeup For Dummies class. It’s free of charge and I got some very valuable knowledge and practice, not to mention probably $50 worth of freebies.

Link to comment

Now let's see if I can post a photo. There's a chance this might be WAY TOO BIG, it's hard to manage files well on the device I'm on.

 

 

IMG_3275.JPG

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Jay you look great.  As to being embarrassed?  You need to work on confidence.  It's OK to be you.  Obviously the older woman you mentioned had gotten over this and was open and involved.  That's something to look forward to.  

 

I'm glad to hear you had a good time.  

 

Jani

Link to comment

Thanks!

 

It's funny, in most aspects of my life I am past being embarrassed. Most people who know me would tell you I am very comfortable with who I am.

 

When I was having all those feelings yesterday, it was like I had regressed 20 years. I don't miss those years of teenage awkwardness at all. I guess it makes sense. When I was learning how to be a man as a teenager, it was awkward and embarrassing. Now I'm learning how to be a woman and going through some of the same things.

 

I was really happy for that lady, and felt a little envious. She seemed comfortable and very authentic. I wonder how long ago she started her transition.

 

I have always been a quiet, considerate person; it's just how I was raised. Sometimes loud, talkative, interruptive people rub me the wrong way. I often experience this when I leave the US South and visit certain (but not all) parts of the Northeast. As part of the culture up there, the people just communicate in a different way, which to me seems brash and aggressive. I think a big part of my uncharitable thoughts toward her was just a difference in communication style. It's very possible she was also insecure.

Link to comment
  • Admin

Most Trans Peeps are going to STILL see the Assigned Gender face underneath with a coat of paint on it.  When you have not come to acceptance that your face IS THE FACE of your personal gender, makeup is not going to look right, and until you become familiar with its application, it will not feel right and may feel even a bit like a mask.  With the acceptance of the face and familiarity of the process will come relaxation and less embarrassment.  With a makeup lesson we also are giving another person control over us which in the MtF area is "unnatural" and humiliating to a small degree and also a bit of excitement that can embarrass us in other ways if we think other people are looking.

On a related note, the difference between the hair cuts I got as a boy and man, and the hair salon experience I have as myself are gigantic, and the first few times were strange and unsettling.  Today, it is relaxing and affirming since I am lucky enough to have a hair stylist with a MtF Trans sister and the shop experience in my new normal.  (I know why Barber Shops made me even more edgy in the old days now.)

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

 Oh my goodness what a fantastic story, I read every word with anticipation, I totally need to go to this class too, and I know exactly how you feel because I sweat profusely due to hyperhidrosis. It’s funny that you mention this older woman, there is a woman just like that in my group and most of us just wish she would be a little bit more quiet or maybe just listen a little bit more, ha ha. I’ve noticed that southern women have a quiet politeness that cannot be beat, just be yourself honey you sound  delightful !

 I know the very first thing you talked about was your size, don’t worry !  I’d rock some big girl curves all day long if I had them !  The bottom line here is your picture is awesome ! Your makeup looks great!  You are way too cute, just be yourself don’t worry about the rest, it may take time to get there but believe me when I tell you you’re doing fine!

Thank you for posting this super awesome experience with your picture, I feel I personally benefited greatly from your writing and I’m excited to see when a class starts near me !

 Hugs, 

Jackie

Link to comment

Thanks y'all! I'm really okay with my appearance, although it has taken me many years to get to that point. My face and body wouldn't be to a lot of people's liking, but I don't have the goal of impressing or seducing anyone; I just want to be age and situation appropriate, present whatever gender I want, and reflect my own personal style.

 

In other words, I ain't mad about being fat, but it would be nice if it was easier and cheaper to find clothes to fit me. It's not me that's the problem, it's the culture and business practices of the fashion industry.

 

I'm also happy to report that I haven't seen a man in the mirror in years. I have seen a non-binary androgynous person. So this step across the threshold into seeing a woman there isn't as huge a step as it would be for trans women who don't have my androgynous bent. It sure is exciting, though!

Link to comment

Jay, honey, you look lovely in that selfie!  

I'm glad that you learned so much in the class. I'll probably go to one before too long and have been wondering about the experience, so thank you for sharing such beautifully detailed post! 

Link to comment

Thanks! By that point in the day I really was feeling lovely. I hope to be able to recreate that someday soon.

 

"Beautifully detailed" is a very generous way to describe a stream-of-consciousness recollection which managed to omit any actual information about skincare or makeup. I felt qualified to report what happened and how I felt about it, but I didn't want to provide any misinformation by attempting to detail the actual lesson. I hope any interested parties can find a class in their area!

 

 

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   10 Members, 0 Anonymous, 128 Guests (See full list)

    • Jet McCartney
    • Abigail Genevieve
    • Ashley0616
    • EasyE
    • VickySGV
    • Timi
    • Carolyn Marie
    • KatieSC
    • ClaireBloom
    • MaeBe
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.6k
    • Total Posts
      768.2k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,022
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Asher the Enby Goddex
    Newest Member
    Asher the Enby Goddex
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Bebhar
      Bebhar
      (41 years old)
    2. caelensmom
      caelensmom
      (40 years old)
    3. Jani
      Jani
      (70 years old)
    4. Jessicapitts
      Jessicapitts
      (37 years old)
    5. klb046
      klb046
      (30 years old)
  • Posts

    • Abigail Genevieve
      Years passed.  The kids grew up and they were empty-nesters.  Lois went full-time at her company.   "We have a Halloween party every year."  He had heard of that.    "You've upheld your end of our bargain for so very long.  How about - do you have something appropriate to wear in the female line?"   Did he.  She was dressed like a penguin, but he wore a women's skirted suit, dark hose, one-inch heels, gold jewelry, well-done makeup and a wig.   "I would not recognize you.  What's this?"   "Padding."    "If I didn't know better I would think you were just a rather tall businesswoman.  No one at the party knows you, no one is expecting a man in drag.  How about your voice and walk?"   He had obviously been practicing them.   The party was a blast.  Odie was happier than she had ever seen him, freer somehow, reveling in being feminine. Lois liked "her" as a charming friend.   "That was fun," he said, driving home.   "It is hard now to think you are a man," she said, and looked at him.   "To tell you the truth I had such a wonderful time I never want to wear men's clothing again. I will, because I must."   "I mean, you are convincing as a woman.  More than you are as a man."   "I think we need to get some professional help."   And they did.  Lois was determined to walk through this, as was Odie, and when he learned she was not walking out but working through, he was overjoyed.    
    • Ivy
      I am aware of this.  It seems a little unnecessary considering that most of us do this at home every day of our lives.  But okay.  It does seem a bit harsh to require the trans kids to go outside and find a bush to poop under.  Stalls with a little more actual privacy might help.  But the real problem is trans people's existence.  Not to worry, the GOP is working o that one. I don't think this would be as much a problem if the transphobes didn't harp on it so much.  There are already laws about stalking and assault. Perhaps, if as a society we were more open about our bodies we could get past this.  Not that this is likely to happen tho.   Yeah.  That's the problem with these laws.  Kids - especially teens, need some privacy of their own to grow up into who they are.  I can see where a kid might experiment with pronouns for a couple of months, and then decide it's not for them.  Pity for them to get beat up in the meantime.   I (thankfully) didn't know everything my kids got into.  And I know my parents didn't know everything about me.   We can give our guidance, but ultimately they need to figure it out on their own.
    • VickySGV
      Parenting and Parental Control play a significant role in my backstory including my addiction history both as child and parent of 3 children now in their 40's.  Big take away that keeps proving true even with new friends and with one of my children as the parent of 3 teenage children is a statement made by one of my parenting counselors and confirmed in other places --   Parents, NEVER do the best they CAN or could do, they will however do the best they KNOW HOW to do.    Getting hit with that statement and some other things did lead me to see that I needed to learn my job better as a parent, which I went ahead and did, and have since made major changes.  It made me very aware that my parents had both had very strange and ineffective parenting skills taught to them which I mistakenly was carrying on with my three children.  My children's  other parent who removed themself due to other personal problems was no better due to their background of parenting either.  I am happy to say that my grandchildren benefited from their parents making intentional efforts to be sure that bad family practices were changed and updated.  Result is that one Gender Questioning and two decidedly Cis  grandchildren have supportive parents where bathroom and sports discomfort is based on actual threats of real physical harm or on invasion of personal boundaries.  Possession of a particular anatomy is a neutral subject there.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      He pushed it out.   Years passed.  Graduation, engagement to Lois.  He was 5'10", she was 5'3".  People thought the height difference was amusing.  At one point he thought to himself I will never fit in her clothes.  Bewildered as to where the thought had come from, he suppressed it. Marriage.   Wedding night: sitting, waiting in anticipation of what was to come.  Lois had left her dress on the bed and was in the hotel bathroom.   He drew in a breath and touched it.  Lacy, exquisitely feminine.  He stroked it.  Incredible.  A whole different world, a different gender, enticing.  "Like it?" she said, as she came out.  He nodded.  But she was meaning her negligee.   Later she noticed a small tear in her wedding dress and wondered where it came from.   Over the years there were dresses that had not been hung up properly in her closet, as if they had been taken down and hung up incorrectly.  It made no sense. Her underwear drawer had been gone through.  She checked the locked windows. They had a landlord at that time.  Pervert, coming into apartments and doing this.  She felt violated.   Then they bought a house.  They had two kids.  Her underwear drawer was being regularly gone through. Not Odie. It could not be Odie.  Odie was as macho as they come, something she liked.  It could not possibly be Odie. Finally there was a slip with a broken strap.   "Odie, I found the strap on my black slip torn.  How could that have happened?'   He didn't know.  He looked guilty, but he didn't know.   The rifling stopped for a while, then started up again.  She read up on cross-dressing.    "Odie, I love you," she said, "I've been reading up on cross-dressing."   He had that deer-in-the headlights look.   "I've read it is harmless, engaged in by heterosexual men, and is nothing to be ashamed of."   He looked at her. No expression.   "Look, I am even willing to buy you stuff in your size.  A friend of mine saw you sneaking around the women's clothing department at Macy's, then you bought something and rushed out.  No more of that, okay? The deal is that you don't do it in front of me or the kids. Do we have a deal?"   They had a deal.  Lois thought it was resolved, and her stuff was no longer touched. Every now and again a package arrived for "Odi", deliberately misspelling his name, and she never opened those.  Sometimes they went and bought things, but he never tried them on in front of her.   "The urge just builds until I have to, Lois.  I am sorry. It's like I can't control it." "That's what I read.  But your Dad would kill you." "There is that."   Lois thought the deal would last.  Things were under control.  
    • Davie
      Lama Rod describes himself as a Black Buddhist Southern Queen. He wants to free you from suffering. Lama Rod Owens is seen as an influential voice in a new generation of Buddhist teachers. He blends his training in the Kagyu School of Tibetan Buddhism with experiences from his life as a Black, queer man, raised as a Christian in the South.   https://apnews.com/article/buddhist-lama-black-lgbtq-wellness-506b1e85687d956eff81f7f4261f5e98  
    • MaeBe
      I would have balked years ago, echoing the parenting of generations before me, exclaiming "Parents know best!" at what I just wrote. It hasn't been that long, but I came to a realization that some of that need for control is unwarranted. Is my child really harming anything by identifying a certain way? Are they being harmed by having others in and around their lives that do? I have been more conversational with my kids when it comes to things and when we run into issues. Like when friends that were toxic, start coming back into the fold, I wanted to make sure that bad behaviors aren't (re)occurring. Or when we notice behaviors that concern us that we have a dialogue. Those chats aren't always nice, clean, or resolved perfectly, but we're communicating. We're learning from each other in those moments, which lead to things being shared that I am sure other parents aren't hearing from their kids and we grow as people because of it.   I will say, it's been easier over the past few years (even before hormones) as this more feminine me finds its way out. I'm a lighter touch, I don't get as entrenched as I once did, and I feel connected a little more emotionally. But, of course, I still make mistakes. As long as we learn from them, right?
    • missyjo
      1. attended Keystone conference a celebration of genders with 700 other lgbt friends. it was wonderful, other lgbt folks, hotel staff n town all welcoming n that felt great.   2. part time job in ladies clothing store, bring missy n helping women dress n relating to them as one    3. folks here   4. creepy guys trying to hit on me..laughs..wrong audience but something must be right   your turn friends
    • missyjo
      orange cotton top n sashed jeans..wedges off now..torrid undies in light blue bra n lace panties   I'm trying minimum makeup..shrugs..well see hugs if you want them
    • Abigail Genevieve
      It was hot that August day, even in Hall J.  Hall J was a freshman dormitory, and Odie had just unpacked his stuff.  He sat on the edge of his bed.  He had made it. He was here, five hundred miles away from home.  His two roommates had not arrived, and he knew no one. His whole life lay ahead of him, and he thought of the coming semester with excitement and dread.   No one knew him.  No one. Suddenly he was seized with a desire to live out the rest of his life as a woman.  With that, he realized that he had felt that way for a long time.  He had never laughed when guys made jokes about women, and often he felt shut out of certain conversations.  He was neither effeminate nor athletic, and he had graduated just fine, neither too high in his class to be considered a nerd or low enough to not get into this college, which was more selective than many. He was a regular guy.  He had dated some, he liked girls and they liked him.  He had friends, neither fewer than most nor more than most.   Drama club in high school: he had so wanted to try out for female parts but something held him back.  He remembered things from earlier in his life: this had been there, although he had suppressed it. Mom had caught him carrying his sister's clothes to his room when he was eight, shortly before the divorce, and he got thoroughly scolded.  They also made sure it never, ever happened again. He had always felt like that had contributed somehow to the divorce, but it was not discussed, either.  He was a boy and that was the end of it.   Dad was part of that.  He got Odie every other weekend from the time of the divorce and they went hunting, fishing, boating, doing manly things because Dad thought he should be a man's man. The first thing that always happened was the buzz cut.  Dad was always somewhat disappointed in Odie, it seemed, but never said why.  He was a hard man and he had contempt for sissies, although that was never directed at Odie. Mom always said she loved him no matter what, but never explained what that meant.   Odie looked through the Freshman Orientation Packed.  Campus map.  Letter from the Chancellor welcoming him.  Same from the Dean.  List of resources: health center, suicide prevention, and his heart skipped a beat: transgender support.  There was something like that here?   He tore off a small piece of paper.  With sweating hands he wrote on it "I need to be a girl." He looked at it, tore it up and put the different pieces in different trash cans, even one in a men's room toilet the men on this floor shared. He flushed it and made sure it went down.  No one had seen him; he was about the first to arrive.   He returned to his room.   He looked in the mirror.  He was five-ten, square jawed, crew cut.  Dad had seen to it that he exercised and he had muscles.  No, he said to himself, not possible. Not likely.  He had to study and he had succeeded so far by pushing this sort of thing into the back of his mind or wherever it came from.   A man was looking back at him, the hard, tough man Dad had formed him to be, and there was absolutely nothing feminine about any of it.  With that, Odie rejected all this stuff about being trans.  There had been a few of those in high school, and he had always steered clear of them.  A few minutes later he met his roommates.
    • EasyE
      yes, i agree with this ... i guess my biggest frustrations with all this are: 1) our country's insistence to legislate everything with regards to morals ... 2) the inability to have a good, thorough, honest conversation which wrestles with the nuances of these very complex issues without it denigrating to name-calling or identity politics.  agreed again... i still have a lot to learn myself ... 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      It's been bugging me that the sneakers I have been wearing are 1) men's and 2) I need canvas, because summer is coming.  WM has a blue tax on shoes, don't you know? My protocol is to go when there is no one in the ladies' area because I get looks that I don't like, and have been approached with a 'can I help you sir' in a tone than means I need to explain myself, at which point i become inarticulate.   But I found these canvas shoes.  Looking at them, to see if they would pass as male, I realized they might not, and furthermore, I don't really care.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      My wife's nurse was just here.  It is a whole lot easier to relate to her as another woman than to negotiate m/f dynamics and feel like I have to watch myself as a male around her.  It dropped a lot of the tension off, tension that I thought entirely internal to myself, but it made interactions a whole lot better.     I read your post, so I thought I would go look.   In the mirror I did not see a woman; instead I saw all these male features.  In the past that has been enough for me to flip and say 'this is all stupid ridiculous why do I do this I am never going to do this again I am going to the basement RIGHT NOW to get men's stuff and I feel like purging'.  Instead I smiled, shrugged my shoulders and came back here.  Panties fit, women's jeans fit.  My T shirt says DAD on it, something I do not want to give up, but a woman might crazily steal hubby's t-shirt and wear it.  I steal my own clothes all the time.    But she is here, this woman I liked it when I saw her yesterday. and her day will come.  I hope to see her again.
    • April Marie
      So many things become easier when you finally turn that corner and see "you" in the mirror. Shedding the guilt, the fear, the questioning becomes possible - as does self-love - when that person looking back at you, irrespective of what you're wearing, is the real you.   I am so happy for you!! Enjoy the journey and where it leads you.
    • MaeBe
      I'm sure even the most transphobic parents would, too. What does it hurt if a child socializes outside of their family in a way that allows them to understand themselves better? I have encountered a handful of kids do the binary, non-binary, back to binary route and they got to learn about themselves. In the end, there may have been some social self-harm but kids are so darned accepting these days. And really, schools aren't policing pronouns, but the laws that are coming out are making them do so--and in turn requiring a report to a parent that may cause some form of harm to the child.   If the kid wants to lie to, or keep secrets from, their parents about their gender expressions, what does it say about the parents? Perhaps a little socialization of their thoughts will give them the personal information to have those conversations with them? So when they do want to have that conversation they can do so with some self-awareness. This isn't a parent's rights issue, it's about forcing a "moral code" onto schools that they must now enforce--in a way that doesn't appreciably assist parents or provide benefit to children.   So, a child that transitioned at 5 and now in middle/high school that is by all rights female must now go into a bathroom full of dudes? What about trans men, how will the be treated in the girl's restroom? I see a lot of fantasy predator fearmongering in this kind of comment. All a trans kid wants to do in a bathroom is to handle their bodily functions in peace. Ideally there would be no gendered restrooms or, at least, a valid option for people to choose a non-gendered restroom. However, where is the actual harm happening? A trans girl in a boy's room is going experience more harm than a girl being uncomfortable about a trans girl going into and out of a stall.   How about we teach our children that trans people aren't predators who are trying to game the system to eek out some sexual deviancy via loophole? How about we treat gender in a way that doesn't enforce the idea that girls are prey and boys are  predators? How about we teach them trans kids are just kids who want to get on with their day like everyone else?
    • Adrianna Danielle
      I hope so and glad he loves and accepts me for who I am
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...