Today is the big day.

[Mickey]

So after almost 4 years worth of fighting, the big day is finally here. My friend is picking me up about 11:15 so we can meet another friend at the surgery center. I check in at 12:30, and the surgery will be about 2, lasting about an hour. I've no idea how long recovery will be. My first check up with the Dr is 3 weeks from today.

I did have a bit of a shock when a lady from the Dr's office called me earlier this week. I was under the impression that my insurance would be covering the whole thing. I mean, I am dirt poor after all. But apparently not. I am responsible for 10%, which comes out to $350 and some change. I was a little upset and figured I would have to make arrangements to pay $5 a month.  I posted on Facebook about this, and within and hour, my friends had pitched in and I had almost $500. And 1 friend gave me $350 for this. I have also had friends give of themselves, which I value much mroe than money. One is picking me up, waiting at the surgery center, and then taking me back home. Another friend is driving in from Jackson Tennessee, I'm in Memphis. She's gonna be my nurse for a little while. Another friend is cooking some meals for me, while I'm in recovery. They came by last night and dropped off a few meals to get me through tomorrow. And other friends have given so much emotional support.

 

I am happy this day is finally here. And I am looking forward to living my life, more comfortably.

[Raven1981]

Congrats on your surgery coming up.  Which surgery are you getting?  

 

Lots of Love

 

Amy

[Mickey]

4 minutes ago, Amy LeBlanc said:

Congrats on your surgery coming up.  Which surgery are you getting?  

 

Lots of Love

 

Amy

A bi-lateral orchiectomy with scrotaplasty. This Dr asked me if I wanted him to do the scrotaplasty "...So things will lay flatter." And he asked before I could even mention it.

At this point, I am just trying to not think about how hungry I am.

[Susan]

That is really great!!!! I hope everything goes good without any complications. 

 

Hugs Susan

[Jani]

Congratulations Mickey!   You are so blessed to have so many good friends who care for you.   I'll be thinking of you today.  Let us know how you are when you get a moment.  

 

Cheers, Jani

[Rachael]

Sending you wishes for a speedy recovery. congratulations.

[Mickey]

Well, today was a huge disappointment. I made it all the way to the bed and surgical gown, with the IV in my arm, when the anesthesiologist comes in. The nurse had noticed some slight  in my lower legs. And then this anesthesiologist comes in and as we're talking he checks my legs. He finished and moved his hand to the inside of my mid thigh. And left it there while we talked. Then told the urologist that he wasn't putting me to sleep because of the edema. THAT WASN'T EVEN BAD AT ALL. He was a total jerk to me, constantly asking me if I had congestive heart failure, the NOT listening to me when I told him NO. And that my heart Dr has said multiple times that I have a healthy heart. So surgery was cancelled. So I am mad as hell and extremely disappointed.

[Susan]

I am really sorry to hear that. I can't blame you for feeling that way. I would most likely would be even more upset and mad that you would not want to be around me. I hope you can get it done very soon. Take care and let us know what happens. Hugs! Susan

[Jani]

I'm sorry to hear this.  Have they given you a plan of action for "recovery" and a reschedule?

 

Jani

[Rachael]

I can’t even imagine how that must feel. Hoping you can get things worked out. Good luck. 

[Mickey]

I have some calls to make this morning. First to my heart Dr, so they can send a letter stating that my heart is healthy. Second to my urologists office to reschedule the surgery. And this time, the same anesthesiologist will NOT be involved. I also need to find out who I can make a complaint with, against the anesthesiologist for inappropriately touching me, and making me feel extremely uncomfortable.

[Susan]

Hey there. I would be calling a lawyer that deals with that kind of thing. I am not sure what area that falls under but I am sure there is one there. I don't blame you for how you are feeling but Jeff's a positive attitude and keep up on everyone that needs to be involved. Sounds like your doctor and others are behind you! You in girl!!! Hope this helps. Susan

[tracy_j]

20 hours ago, Mickey said:

 I also need to find out who I can make a complaint with, against the anesthesiologist for inappropriately touching me, and making me feel extremely uncomfortable.

 

I do wonder about the touching. I am not a doctor so couldn't say for certain, but as there was a possible circulatory issue could he have just been checking a femoral pulse? I think you should ask for an explanation, but it does seem that it may well be innocent to me. Particularly as it sounds like you were not alone together. As I say, I am not medically qualified, and was not there but it is easy to check.

 

Tracy

[Mickey]

1 hour ago, tracy_j said:

 

I do wonder about the touching. I am not a doctor so couldn't say for certain, but as there was a possible circulatory issue could he have just been checking a femoral pulse? I think you should ask for an explanation, but it does seem that it may well be innocent to me. Particularly as it sounds like you were not alone together. As I say, I am not medically qualified, and was not there but it is easy to check.

 

Tracy

When Drs are checking for a pulse, don't they normally use their fingers? He had his whole hand on the inside of my thigh, almost midway up it. The whole thing just felt... off. Wrong. Very uncomfortable.

[Charlize]

I'm sorry you are going through this Mickey.  I had trouble getting clearance for surgery due to cardiac issues.  Often the problem is due to potential problems with anesthesia.  They decided to do the procedure under local but because i was talking so much i was eventually put under.  i guess being a chatty Cathy made me even more comfortable in the end.  I can understand your frustration.  Try to take a deep breath and do whatever it takes to reschedule your surgery.

I would let the "hand" issue drop just because you've got plenty on your plate already.

If it helps any i had a similar surgery and am happy with the results.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[Briana]

Hi Mickey,

 

I can certainly understand your frustration.   That has to be a total let-down.   Hopefully you can get things rescheduled quickly. 

 

While you may have thought the swelling was "not that bad" in your legs, any swelling would be something to note and consider preop/pre-anesthesia.  While the anesthesiologist may have been overly cautious, he's also keeping your safety in mind.  Anesthesia can take a left turn very quickly.  People tend to think that surgery is very exciting as it's portrayed on TV - constant motion and drama.  Generally it's hours of routine boredom punctuated occasionally by a few moments of sheer terror.  That "terror" is generally when people have an unexpected bad reaction to the anesthesia. 

 

Best of luck!

 

[Jani]

I would always prefer they err on the side of caution.  Years ago a guy I worked with had shoulder surgery and never came out of the anesthesia.  He was young and healthy.  it was so sad.  We never know how our bodies will react to it.   You'll be fine and your day will come. 

 

Jani

[tracy_j]

22 hours ago, Mickey said:

When Drs are checking for a pulse, don't they normally use their fingers? He had his whole hand on the inside of my thigh, almost midway up it. The whole thing just felt... off. Wrong. Very uncomfortable.

 

As I said, I am not a doctor. I have worked extensively in a medical field though and have seen doctors checking patients often. Obviously I could be wrong, but it sounds fairly normal to me. There are many clues an experienced doctor can pickup from seemingly odd procedures. I could attempt to explain about  swellings and temperature differences etc but I am not qualified to. Personally I would just let it go.

 

Tracy

[Mickey]

On 9/22/2018 at 12:16 AM, Mickey said:

And that my heart Dr has said multiple times that I have a healthy heart.

I guess this could be a bit more clear. I saw my heart Dr a couple of months ago. I want to say in July. Maybe June. Anyway, when I saw my heart Dr last, he said my heart was healthy. The same thing he has been saying every 6 months, since 2013. I know what congestive heart failure looks like. One of my dearest friends had it, when we first met. Then she had heart surgery and is doing and looking much better. I can say with utmost confidence, I DO NOT have congestive heart failure. The anesthesiologist was a complete jerk. And that is putting it mildly and politely, for the sake of this forum.

I know y'all think that this is support, trying to convince me that this man did the right thing, but you are wrong. I know me. I know my body. And I have been fighting for this procedure for FOUR years now. And it has truly been a fight. The first year I was fighting with my insurance company. And unbeknownst to me, my Urologist at the time. Ever since it was approved by my insurance company, I've been fighting systemic transphobia among Drs and hospital surgical centers. While my new Urologist, I feel, is on my side and willing to help, that does NOT mean that his whole team is also on my side and willing to help.

 

And I find myself wondering if you're really suggesting that what I consider to be sexual assault, that I just let it go? Really?

[tracy_j]

You go with what you feel is right. We are not there and can only advise on our experiences. As I said, 'I could be wrong'. My suggestion to let it go was more about you getting to where you want to be rather than getting into a complex (essentially) side issue of mis-conduct which may delay that.

 

Tracy