Good morning All. Coffees on.

[KymmieL]

Patti Ann are you forgetting SL's sister, me. I will also  support you and  my sister. In any way I can.  

 

So, how is Shawna's stress level?

Hopefully better than she was on the road. 

Hugs

 

Kymmie. 

[Jackie C.]

1 hour ago, Susan R said:

I’ve heard there extremely uncomfortable and sometimes painful. I’m certainly not looking forward to it.

 

It tickles. A LOT. It was hard to keep still.

 

Hugs!

[Patti Anne]

2 hours ago, Susan R said:

I’ve heard there extremely uncomfortable and sometimes painful. I’m certainly not looking forward to it. I’m hoping for a good report so I can have my consult.

 

Shawna recently had one done and said that it wasn't the best part of her day. On the other hand, it's just one minor piece of the puzzle to have to get your consult. I hope it goes well. We're sending positive vibes in your direction!

[Willow]

@Susan R hi I get a tube put up my nose and down my throat every three months or so for a doctor to look at my larynx.  This is a follow up to having had laryngeal  cancer.  My advice, relax, don’t think about it and it will be over in a couple seconds.  And just remember this is just a necessary step to a wonderful goal.

[KathyLauren]

I just watched a nerdy astrophysics lecture from 5 years ago, that has just been posted onto YouTube.  What made it worth watching for me was that it had a profound effect on me when I sat in the audience and heard it for the first time, live, back then.  The lecturer was transgender, the first transgender person I had actually seen.

 

For years, I had been wondering if I could possibly be transgender, and I always came up with excuses why not.  But here was a real trans woman living her life, doing cutting edge science, and giving public lectures.  And I was impressed that there were no off-colour comments from the audience members, not even afterwards.

 

That talk started my quest to free myself.  A few months later, I understood myself better, and almost a year later, I came out to my wife.

 

For the sake of completeness, and since some of you may be as nerdy as me, the talk is at: The Study of the Accretion of PSR J1023+0038 (Catchy title, right?)

[Jani]

She lost me at "Accretion"!   @KathyLauren I am sure this was a riveting lecture for those in attendance.  I am also glad that you were there and had your own epiphany.  You will alway remember this moment.  Did you ever reach out to Dr. Archibald to tell her that she inspired you?   And yes the title says it all!

 

Jani

[Carrie]

Hi Kathy

It is always good to have people that inspire us.

LOL The two people that inspired me the most I met in a low cost boarding house. They were both trans and had both transitioned in opposite directions. 

For those that thought coming out in 1990 was bad think what it must of been for both of them. We sat down and talked for hours and over several months. Those two trans people had so much influence in my life. I admired them both very much.  I think I came very soon after that.  lol Maybe a year later. 

If anyone ever considers how hard it is try and imagine those that came before us.

Thank you Kathy for reminding me where I come from.

May life be kind to you

Carrie

[KathyLauren]

31 minutes ago, Jani said:

Did you ever reach out to Dr. Archibald to tell her that she inspired you?  

 

I thought about it at one time, but never did.  The release of the video might be a suitable occasion to do so.  Hmm.

[Susan R]

What a day! I finished my morning Telehealth therapy session riding on a high. This is always the case with therapy but then had the covid test to take. Hey, it turned out not too painful and it was especially fast. They had to do both nostrils which I thought was odd but I guess it’s the norm. So it’s done and I won’t worry too much about getting the next one before surgery.

 

I got home, got the mail which included a letter from my health insurance.  So my primary care provider (PCP) was automatically changed. Unfortunately for me in this case, my PCP is also my gender health internal medicine prescriber. I found out over many calls and a 45 min. drive to my provider today, they’re in the middle of contract negotiations with my in network provider.  So my PCP is (temporarily?) no longer under contract and my insurance stuck me with some random non-gender health PCP...at least for the time being.  My insurance included new insurance cards listing my new PCP..lol. This, of course, happens right after doing my online check-in with my surgeon’s office.  During the check-in, I sent images of the front/back of my old insurances card with my old PCP listed. I spent hours on the phone trying to find a solution but the issue is above everyone’s pay grade so no answers tonight.

 

Sometimes daily plans go right out the window. Here it is 8pm and I am just now having my first meal of the day. Crazy!

 

Susan R?

[Tori M]

Yea, @Susan R, what a day indeed!

 

1 hour ago, Susan R said:

they’re in the middle of contract negotiations with my in network provider.  So my PCP is (temporarily?) no longer under contract

 

Ok, so now our healthcare works like cable TV providers?!  ugh

[Susan R]

14 hours ago, Tori M said:

Yea, @Susan R, what a day indeed!

Ok, so now our healthcare works like cable TV providers?!  ugh

Yeah, my thoughts exactly...whatever happened to the old days when you could count on continuity of care? Lucky, my PCP moved my appointments back to every 3 months instead of every 30 days. Hopefully, these insurance vs. provider ‘negotiations’ will be completed by then.

[Tori M]

32 minutes ago, Susan R said:

Yeah, my thoughts exactly...whatever happened to the old days when you could count on continuity of care? Lucky, my PCP moved my appointme ts back to every 3 months instead of every 30 days. Hopefully, these insurance vs. provider ‘negotiations’ will be completed by then.

 

Is there a 1-800 number we should be calling?  ?

[Kaltia_Atlas]

Good morning all and happy Tuesday! I have my first appointment with my Eurologist this week. Going to be looking into HRT and trying to learn more about what comes next. What options I have before HRT, what I can do to prepare, making a plan. Super excited!!!!

 

Hugs ❤️

Kali

[KymmieL]

Well having my weekend earlier than normal. the other asst. manager is going on vacation. Looking forward to having my younger grandsons visit for the 4th weekend. Eli (4) and Izzy (4mo). My wife and youngest are going to my sons Friday to pick them up.

 

Life is seemingly back to normal. I have put in for a position at the home office in Springfield, MO. If I get it. I am going to leave. and be who I need to be for the rest of my life. I intend on going completely living as my true self female. I haven't decided if I will tell my wife before I leave. If I do I will be up front about what I am doing ,and why. I will give her the option to come with me. On one condition, I am going to live as a female.

She can take or leave it. I just hope love trumps everything and she decides to join me.

 

Hugs. Kymmie

[Jackie C.]

Good for you @KymmieL! You deserve to be happy. I hope your spouse decides that she loves you enough to join you but if she doesn't, well that's her loss.

 

@Susan R, that completely blows chunks. Pretend I went on a ten-page diatribe here about for-profit health care. I'm pretty sure I'd break a dozen site rules doing it too. I'll just leave it with my conclusion though: We can do better. We all deserve better.

 

Hugs!

[Willow]

Unfortunately insurers have a lot of different plans and types of plans.  
 

HMO plans have contracted doctors.  The doctor gets a small monthly payment from the HMO plan whether you see him(her) or not.  They can’t pay a doctor who isn’t under contract with the plan.  You should be allowed to choose a different doctor that is part of the plan if you don’t like the one they picked.

 

the typical PPO plan you can go to any covered doctor but you have to pay a co-pay and the premium is typically larger, but they don’t have contracted doctors they have member doctors just like you are a plan member.
 

medical insurance is very confusing, Medicare is even more confusing.  The affordable care act was supposed simplify everything But in reality it just added yet another layer of confusion, increased the cost to buyers while decreasing the coverage.  Had they simply modeled the Affordable care Act after Medicare Coverage but required you pay the cost of the coverage, that might have worked.  The problem with that is it potentially brings us to socialized medicine.  If you think socialized medicine is a good idea, look at the wait time for elective procedures.  You want top or bottom surgery?  You can get it the question is when not if.

 

One of Obama’s objectives was to control the Huge profits being made by insurance companies Which he believed were out of control.  
 

Everyone pretty much agrees changes should be made but no one wants to be responsible for the results of the changes since it is highly likely there will be improvements but there will also be new problems.
 

sorry about the lengthy message, I’ve been negotiating medical insurance coverage since the mid 80s and I hope this helps

 

 

[Jackie C.]

Except, y'know, medicare and medicaid are already socialized medicine. It works fine in lots of countries where it's implemented properly. In the US we just seem to have trouble with a certain group of people who yell, "This doesn't work." When they are somehow put in charge of the thing that's not supposed to work by their ideology they go about making sure that they're right. Then they privatize it. The level of service drops and the price goes up. Then they shout, "Success!" and move on to making millions on the next thing.

 

We have the capability and the resources to take care of everyone. In a just society, that would be a thing we'd at least try to do. That we refuse to do that is a travesty. History, presuming there is one, will judge us harshly for our wasted potential. That's all I'm going to say on the matter.

[ShawnaLeigh]

On 6/28/2020 at 7:48 PM, KymmieL said:

 

I don't think you could call, Shawna sane, She was way pass stressed the whole trip.

 

Hope you both destressed today.

 

Kymmie

I wasn’t THAT stressed out. For crying out loud I was upset leaving my old life behind.  Not the super fun and exciting thing I had hoped it would be.  I was balling most of the first few hours on the road.  Broke down again while taking my evening shower that night and a couple days afterwards I had another crying melt down.  
Heck I had one the even we got home.  It was an unbelievably emotional trip for me.  
Patti Anne was a wonderful and understanding with all that.  
 

On 6/29/2020 at 5:15 AM, Patti Anne said:

 

 Thanks, Susan and @Tori M! @ShawnaLeigh and I were talking last night before bed and we both agreed that the trip, despite the tire failure in NV, was a very fun trip overall. Where we used to sent about 10,000 texts a day, we spent the entire trip talking! LOL! Didn't have to do so much as one correction on speech to text on our phones!

 

I have learned so much about coming out in the past 10 days. SL thought it might be beneficial for others for me to post about it. Of course, I was scared to death at the beginning. On day one we went to a WalMart, Kohl's and Old Navy. After getting over my initial fear, I noticed that not only did we not get any looks or snide remarks, the only reaction we got of note was a few women smiling (sweetly) at us. Even going to use the restroom, was no biggie! Not only did we not get any looks or comments from anyone, nobody cared!  Angela, SL's ex, was with us and was so supportive. She said that if anyone said anything to us to tell her and she'd deal with it, as I'm sure SL would have as well. (And I would not want to be the one on the receiving end of SL and Angela's wrath!) 

 

When we came home, my daughter and her BF came over for dinner last night, and he was totally fine with my trans situation. My daughter remarked that she'd never seen me so happy. Both just loved SL! And both had various stories about other friends and distant family members who had transitioned or were transitioning. Nobody thinks anything about it. I just learned that my oldest son and daughter are coming in for the weekend after the 4th of July. My younger daughter, the 20 yo, said that she'd make it a point to be in town and we'd have a sort of family talk for me to come out to them, and she thinks that they'll both be fine with it. 

 

So, all in all, things are going much smoother than I ever would have dreamed! The big task at present is to formulate a plan to come out professionally! That will call for some strategic planning, which I'm going to involve my gender therapist and SL in. Since I'm confident that SL will be there for me for support, it seems like it's doable. 

 

Jeez! Just one year ago who'd a thought....?

Patti Anne had moments of sheer bravery and relapses into fear of what others may say or do. All perfectly natural for someone just going out into the world presenting female.  She did very good imho. 
I will say my Ex was very supportive of her and us.  It was just weird.  Most ex-wives are not this way.  They are not suppose to be so nice cool and supportive.  Lol

Yes the trip was fun over all and I drove the entire time.  I needed the distraction of driving to get past my heart ache and I also wanted to say I drove across country.   The trailer tire thing could of been way worse as I could of blown in the desert.  Luckily I saw it at the end of one of out 10 hour drives and Had them both rrplaced early the next morning.  
 

Our new home is beautiful and much nicer then I’m use too.  Though during the last 3 years Patti Anne lived alone as Pat the bachelor so let’s just say it’s a tid bit messy.  

Have no worries.  I’m a neat freak so I will have it in good shape before to long.  Lol

Thank you all for your well wishes and kind words.  We both appreciate the support we have gotten in our relationship here on TP.  
 

[KymmieL]

56 minutes ago, ShawnaLeigh said:

I wasn’t THAT stressed out. 
 

 

I beg your pardon. Ah, From what Patti Says, yeah. you where.

58 minutes ago, ShawnaLeigh said:

Our new home is beautiful and much nicer then I’m use too.  Though during the last 3 years Patti Anne lived alone as Pat the bachelor so let’s just say it’s a tid bit messy.  

Have no worries.  I’m a neat freak so I will have it in good shape before to long.  Lol

 

Well I said it before. Shawna the homemaker. Has a certain ring to it I think. Maybe I need to talk to Patti Ann about it.

 

Kymmie

[Emily michelle]

7 hours ago, KymmieL said:

Well having my weekend earlier than normal. the other asst. manager is going on vacation. Looking forward to having my younger grandsons visit for the 4th weekend. Eli (4) and Izzy (4mo). My wife and youngest are going to my sons Friday to pick them up.

 

Life is seemingly back to normal. I have put in for a position at the home office in Springfield, MO. If I get it. I am going to leave. and be who I need to be for the rest of my life. I intend on going completely living as my true self female. I haven't decided if I will tell my wife before I leave. If I do I will be up front about what I am doing ,and why. I will give her the option to come with me. On one condition, I am going to live as a female.

She can take or leave it. I just hope love trumps everything and she decides to join me.

 

Hugs. Kymmie

You deserve to be happy and get what you want! I hope you get that position then you can start over as the woman you are. Hopefully your wife will come and respect your wishes. Best of luck kymmie 

 

[Willow]

@Jackie C. you are correct that Medicare and Medicaid are a form of socialized medicine.  That’s why I said if they would have patterned something after that...

 

I also admit I should have stopped after explaining HMO and  PPO.  I wasn’t looking to start any sort of political discourse.

 

That said some countries have a very excellent medical system and it works better than we could ever imagine, others, well not so much.  
 

again, I apologize for opening up a can of worms here.  I should have stopped sooner.

 

Have a great day.

 

hugs

 

Willow

[Willow]

@Patti Anne

 

good morning. You are up early.  
 

I really enjoy reading the back and forth between you, SL and Kymmie.  I love your relationship.

 

have a great day

 

Willow

[Cyndee]

Good Morning, 54 here and overcast as the sun climbs higher, coffee tastes great this morning. I'll just say I am grateful for my health and well being today, it's not taken for granted. My mental health is important too, so I tune out the politicians, and all this grim "news". So much beauty and love to be found in the world if you go looking for it, keeping my mind in a better place.

 

Have a lovely day all

 

Cyndee

[KayC]

18 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

We have the capability and the resources to take care of everyone.

I wholeheartedly agree, Jackie!!!   I hope we can finally get there someday.  Imagine!   ??

[Sally Stone]

Just checking in before I have to start work (working from home these days).  Hope everyone is doing well. Oh, and earlier I posted a new personal blog if you care to take a look.