Good morning All. Coffees on.

[SaraAW]

One step closer to officially changing my name.  Finally got my wife to sign off on the Notice of Name Change Request form that is a requirement for folks in Ontario to do when married and wish to change their legal name. It was a struggle to get her to sign it. She's still in denial and grieving over the loss of her husband. She was hoping by not signing, she could delay things more.  After explaining several times, I don't need her permission, I am allowed to send the via registered mail and provide that as proof that I notified her, without needing her to sign it, she finally signed it. Saved me the cost of sending it registered mail, but at the cost of some more strain on our marriage.

 

Now I just need a guarantor to sign off that I have lived in province for at least a year. Hoping my doc will do it without charging me too much. After that $137 and some postage and it should be done. Then changing over everything else in my name. Getting really tired of being referred to my birth name, really looking forward to hearing my name.

 

Still healing from my sinus/nasal surgery. It's progressing slowly, but noticing major improvement from pre-surgery. Lots of thunderstorms and not a single migraine, let alone even a regular headache.

 

Hope everyone has a wonderful day today! Hugs!

[KymmieL]

1 hour ago, Jani said:

  Money is important but without happiness where is the value...

 

Jani you are right.

it would be good for me that I would be able to be with my wife more. As she works days and when I am working closings and weekend we have no time for us.

Maybe I'll talk to the manager and see just what pay cut I will have.

 

Kymmie

[Heather Shay]

wise words - do what you can to nurture relationship but remember there is only one person you have any power to change - you can only plant good seeds.

 

[Susan R]

@SaraAW

Congratulations on this required next step for your name change. It’s going to feel so good when it finally becomes official.? I know it must be difficult not getting the backing of your wife. However, It may help her see in a few weeks or a month that you’re still the same person you’ve always been. Life will continue and your love for her will not waiver due to this legal name change.

 

Susan R? 

[SaraAW]

Thanks @Susan R. That's the goal, help her come to acceptance and continue loving each other. Have a great day! Hugs!

[KayC]

Its a bit quiet here .... where is everybody?   ☕

[Elizabeth Star]

Yesterday was the big day for my wife. She had surgery the for her wrist. Due to some of health issues they ended up only doing a nerve block instead of putting her under general. By the time they finally started she had been in bed for 4 hours and her back as killing her. Most doctors don't understand Arachnoiditis and how much pain she is constantly in. Needless to say, she got nothing help with the back pain. The surgery went well. She now has plates and screws holding her wrist together.

 

For myself the day took a different path, an affirming path. When we checked her her in I got a "Ma'am, please have a seat in the waiting area." Within an hour I found myself having to use the restroom. Although it feels really awkward I used the men's room.  My ID still says male on it and I didn't want to start any fights by using the woman's. After awhile I was in need of food. I got ma'am-ed again. The next time I had to use the restroom, thank you Spiro for making me have to go pee....again....already, I though to myself I got ma'am-ed twice already why not. It felt so normalizing to use the woman's restroom. Hours later I got the call that the surgery was done. The woman on the phone introduced herself then asked if I was Ms. (dead name). Wife was in recovery and I made my back to the waiting area. When I arrived I got ma'am-ed yet again.

 

Inevitably I had to use the restroom again. I tried to time things but ended up at the sink washing my hands with another woman standing next to me. She didn't say a word or give me a second look. My state does have strong anti-discrimination laws to protect trans-people, rest rooms and all, but they won't stop someone from making a scene if I get clocked.

 

I'm taking the day as a win for passing and easing my dysphoria. 

 

?Liz

[Kylie]

Awe @ElizabethStar. Good news about your wife. Glad you had those affirming moments ❤️

[Charlize]

I hope your wife heals quickly and well and you continue to enjoy your journey.   

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[Heather Shay]

Ditto...it must feel wonderful to be called ma'am and I am so happy about your wife.

[KathyLauren]

@ElizabethStar, I am glad to hear that you wife is on the mend.  And very glad to hear about your positive experiences of being gendered correctly.  Using the correct washroom will soon become second nature for you. 

 

Especially in a state where there are legal protections in place, you'd be surprised at how few people will bother to make a scene.  I have been using women's washrooms exclusively for over three years, and have never had anyone make a fuss or say anything gender-related.  I have even had conversations over the stall walls with other women!  Even before I had my ID in order, there is nothing that would have gotten me into a men's room.

[Elizabeth Star]

Thank you @Kylie. And thank you for your GCS thread. I've learned more in the last couple of weeks from you and the other lady's than years of Google searches.

[Lee H]

3 hours ago, KayC said:

ts a bit quiet here .... where is everybody?  

Hi Kay, m'amie. Good morning and wishing you a good, safe, day. 

I've been looking for the button to send you a PM, if you tell me you'd like to receive one from me. ... But I'm old and seriously maladroit with lining up all the digits involved with doing anything digital ... well, almost anything....

If you want a PM from me, know how to do it, and can tell me; and if you are interested in the slightest, I'll send you a little more info about myself and hope you send something back. 

I feel like a giddy teenaged girl. Wow. Feels ... strange? ... good?

 

[Bri2020]

5 hours ago, ElizabethStar said:

When we checked her her in I got a "Ma'am, please have a seat in the waiting area." 

 

I'm taking the day as a win for passing and easing my dysphoria. 

 

?Liz

Congrats on all levels of your day Liz.  I had a great day in that regard as well, went shoe shopping with my wife (scored 5 pairs) and was totally treated as a female from the sales and cahiers people. Double win. Looking forward to more days like that.  

Hope your wife heals quickly and the back gets back to a reasonable( if there is such a thing) level of pain. 

Hugs

Bri 

[KymmieL]

Being Ma'am ed is one of the greatest thing to ever happen to us ladies. be it in person or letter or on the phone. it is a great feeling.

 

Kymmie

[Flux3on]

Well I'm just gonna say what I have planned for tomorrow since it is 10:51 PM for me currently

 

I have an appointment to hopefully get a prescription for hormones ? ?

So super excited about that ❤️

[Willow]

Good luck. I know how much it means to all of us

[Jani]

Best of luck today.  I hope your appointment goes well. 

 

Jani

[Heather Shay]

@Flux3on Best wishes and be prepared to wait a little unless you've already had your baseline numbers from blood tests taken. I havd to wait for my HRT supplier to get all my medical records but even though I was anxious to start - it is well worth the wait to make sure all medical angles are covered.

 

 

[KymmieL]

My Thursday. Tomorrow is TGIF. Thankfully.  I am on my 6th day straight.  My brain is turning into tapioca.  Got all my parts for my stage 1 upgrade on the bike. So Thursday should be putting them on.

 

Seens awful quiet in here.  Maybe the heat is keeping everyone from drinking their  coffee.  LOL.  

 

Kymmie 

[Ellora]

Goof morning and afternoon! It is freakin hot over here in San Diego. It was 106 in Lakeside, where I was earlier, and now Im at my apt closer to the coastline. It is still warm and humid, with no a/c, but I have the fans on full blast. I will be heading back to Lakeside later, but my friend has a/c so no worries there. 

[Willow]

Good afternoon 

 

yes I agree it’s been quiet but I believe if you don’t have anything to say, don’t try to force it.  Works for me anyway.  I still enjoy reading every one else’s posts.  
 

yes, it’s hot ? or at least it’s humid making it feel hot.  I have pre positioned my sailboat so I can get an early start tomorrow.  We plan on going out on the ocean and based on the predicted conditions we should have a decent sail. 10 to 15 knot wind and waves of 1 meter or less.  And anytime it gets too hot, drop the anchor and jump in.  
 

bought food and snacks for the trip. Might need a bottle of wine.    
 

I’ll let y’all know how it goes tomorrow night.

 

hugs

 

Willow

[Willow]

PS, I wore my mask when writing this so I wouldn’t spread anything or catch anything either.

[Bri2020]

Thankfully here in VA we have good weather for once, just low 80s and sun. Rain finally moved out.  Looking forward to mushroom foraging tomorrow!  I'm just hoping I don't get eaten alive by all the mosquitos.  I'm getting to the point that I'm getting PTSD over all the bug bites I've had.  I react horribly to them and they stick around for more than a week.  Gotta take the bad with the good though. All this rain has made it a great year to mushroom hunt.  I've found at least 50 lbs if you include the spring morel season!  If the restaurants were open I would consider selling them and making a few $$ to go toward electrolysis  

 

[Jani]

That's an interesting hobby / diversion Bri.  I know what you mean about mosquitos!!