Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Good morning All. Coffees on.


KymmieL

Recommended Posts

  • Forum Moderator

Hi ladies,

 

i have stayed away for about three weeks.  I don’t plan on going back to read all your wonderful posts.  I’ll just restart here.

 

My wife and I  went to our daughters house for a few days.  While there my son and his wife came to visit too.  That made it even more special.  Since we were all going our separate ways on Friday, the kids decided to talk to me about my being transgender.  Since my relationship with my wife is rather precarious I don’t force things on her like they did.  I didn’t  mind talking to them but to do so at the expense of their mother was difficult at best.  Our daughter in law wound up leading the questions. It went reasonably well. 
 

Willow

Link to comment
  • Replies 23.1k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • Willow

    2014

  • KymmieL

    1637

  • Mmindy

    1358

  • Ivy

    1174

Top Posters In This Topic

Posted Images

Morning @Willow,

 

Missed you while you gone. I'm happy to hear things went good. Sometimes reasonably well is the best we can hope for.

 

I stared using my preferred name at work last week. It's nice to finally see, hear and use it.  I also outed myself and changed my name on facebook. So far it's been well received.

 

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

@Willow sounds like the most effective way to handle the scenario you were in and let it flow organically.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Willow, you missed all the fun. We were all transformed into who we wanted to be. with everyone accepting who we where.

 

Then I woke up. LOL

 

Glad you had a good visit with your kids. I have my two grandsons here right now. it is great.

 

Hugs to all

Kymmie

Link to comment

Good Morning all. So I got a response from my Mom and she says she is going to support me unconditionally. I did hand my dad a note, but he couldn't read it right then and there and haven't heard back from him yet. I am hoping he just hasn't read it yet or that he is doing some reading like I suggested for them to do. That was an emotionally exhausting day, so today a friend and I are going to the Zoo this afternoon to walk around some and take some pictures, hopefully not worrying about the outstanding response.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Thanks for all your kind thoughts.  Glad to know I was missed.  Just goes to show what good friends most of us are to each other.

 

Since October 11th is coming out day, I am strongly leaning towards doing that.  Since it’s a Sunday my thought was To go to church .  Any thoughts or suggestions?

 

Willow

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

@QuestioningAmber wonder in regard to your mom... Great you asked them to read about it.... Super you are spending the day doing something fun 

Link to comment

Good morning,

 

It's cold and rainy but got a big-o-cup of coffee helping me wake up.

 

Today marks the start of the first full week of fully being myself and going by Elizabeth at work. If I haven't mentioned it 42 times already, it feels surreal. Honestly I never though I would live long enough to experience life as myself. It feels so good to finally be out. I lied to myself for so long it was driving me mad and pushing me over the edge. I look back at all the inconsequential things I spent days worrying about. Now it's the important things like what am I going to wear today.

 

Thing at home have been changing for the better. A year ago we would fight over me painting nails. last month I was expected to, but didn't try very hard, dress like a man when we were out in public. Yesterday I wore flare jeans, semi-tight t-shirt, Helm's flag painted nails and heard nothing about it. Although my wife he and him-ed me the whole time, the realtor we met with knew what was up.

 

I think being out together and seeing that people don't have a negative reaction and engage me more in conversation is helping a lot.

 

Again, good morning everyone. Have a great day.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

@ElizabethStar being able to go out even just to the mall, didn’t matter, was something that has helped me get through an ugly patch.  I’m happy for you that your wife is coming around even if she still uses the wrong pronouns.  The question you have to ask yourself is does she do it out of habit or is it intended as disrespect?  Hopefully it is just a habit which will be hard to break.

 

hugs

 

Willow

Link to comment
3 hours ago, ElizabethStar said:

 

 

Today marks the start of the first full week of fully being myself and going by Elizabeth at work. If I haven't mentioned it 42 times already, it feels surreal. Honestly I never though I would live long enough to experience life as myself. It feels so good to finally be out. I lied to myself for so long it was driving me mad and pushing me over the edge. I look back at all the inconsequential things I spent days worrying about. Now it's the important things like what am I going to wear today.

 

 

Have a great week! I hope it all goes well for you!

Link to comment

Good Morning all! 
 

@ElizabethStar That is wonderful news! It takes those around us a little sometimes to get things correct, be patient. I have had that same issue with pronouns so I just steer clear of them because I try and be mindful of others and what I don’t know. 
 

I am up this Monday morning with dread as I had to schedule a last minute visit with my GYN today because of bleeding issues from the granulation tissue. So back to her to have another silver nitrate treatment. Hoping for a better outcome this time, the pain I experienced after last time was intense! 
 

Hope everyone has a wonderful Monday!

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Happy Sunday morning everyone. Well my Sunday. a brisk 22degrees on the back fence. Don't have much planned today. may do another purge of things I don't want or fit into. keep cutting down the collection. SO I don't have a much to move when the time comes. Of course there is way too much as it is. I keep seeing things that I say I need to take. It will depend on whens and whys of when I finally leave. What I take Etc.

 

Kylie, I hope that your gyn can give you some relief from your problem. Worse pain I have ever had was when I broke my ribs. asked what was my pain level from 0-10. I was saying 15.

 

Have a great day.

 

Kymmie

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

@Kylie - I do understand some pain - I remember having a painful tooth and finding an evening service at Sears. Went in - the dentist said I had 2 options - pull the tooth or a root canal. I said there was a third option. He said what was it? I asked if he had a gun. Now I know it might sound gruesome but it is meant to be a pressure release and not meant to make you feel bad - smile things will be alright soon.

Link to comment

Good Morning,

 

Elizabeth - I am sure that is so affirming to start your first week as Elizabeth. I am so happy for you to be at that point.

 

Kylie - I am sorry that you are having such problems, hopefully GYN can help solve the problems shortly.

 

Kymmie - Cleaning up and organizing is never a bad thing. I know your circumstances are less than ideal, however, I think the purging things that don't fit will just mean you can eventually add to your collection more easily.

 

I am just starting my work week and am starting to feel some depression kicking in. I think it might have to do with waiting for a response with my dad still on coming out. It also might be related to the work that I am doing just isn't motivating right now. I am planning on doing a road trip with the wife on Friday to go to a place that is supposed to be open and accepting called Yellow Springs, OH. So that is something that is kind of getting me through the week.

Link to comment

Thanks ladies. 8 weeks post-op today, many things have improved other than this excessive bleeding. Guess we will see how it goes this evening. I’ll follow up here. 
 

Kymmie, 22 degrees, sounds nice! I love cold weather. Have a good time purging, I’ll be doing the same once I recover. I’ve lost a lot of weight during my recovery. So new clothes soon!

 

Shay, I have a pretty high pain tolerance, but the hours after silver nitrate were so painful. She used over 20 sticks of SN so I was cooked, talk about nerve pain where she burned some areas. 
 

Amber, that is wonderful you have weekend plans. That’ll help you get through the week at least! ?

Link to comment

Liz isn't it great to fully out there?  It's still very fresh for me after 2 months. It's gotten to the point where I'm just getting ready for the day like it's a normal day of picking out clothes, doing the makeup (what little I do) and going to work. I don't even think of myself as "trans" presenting as female, it's just normal o'l me.  I'm loving the posts you are making about this time because it's both special for you and makes me remember it wasn't that long ago that I was right there with you. 

This weekend was fun because in preparation for the upcoming wedding I'm attending I went to Sephora to get a "makeup consult". As soon I went in I asked the person checking people in at the door who I should talk to and she pointed me to "Seth". (I should have asked about pronouns since they were wearing full makeup ) Anyways, Seth was so happy and enthusiastic to be guiding me through it made for such a wonderful experience.  You can tell how trans friendly they are there because everyone popped by to get in on the action. lol.  We were all having so much fun.  The only challenge for me now is was on day 2 of my 5 days where I can't really wear makeup due to my electrolysis schedule so I have to wait a few more days to try everything out.

Even with my 3+days of beard growth I'm feeling pretty good about myself today.  Picked out a black and white flower print wrap dress and my 2" pumps for the day and I'm having a great hair day so.....  

Kylie I hope your OB/GYN visit is pain free :(

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator
On 9/27/2020 at 7:18 AM, Willow said:

Since my relationship with my wife is rather precarious I don’t force things on her like they did.  I didn’t  mind talking to them but to do so at the expense of their mother was difficult at best.  Our daughter in law wound up leading the questions. It went reasonably well. 

Good to see you back Willow,

My Suzie isn't comfortable about my transition either. I hope your wife knows that you appreciate and respect her discomfort with the subject of transition. The fact that you think it went reasonably well is a good thing, and if she didn't react negatively when you two were alone is another bonus.

 

My Suzie and I spent the day shopping for better fitting clothes with an androgynous/nonbinary look for me.

 

Weight loss good.

New clothes good.

 

Suzie helping with my sliding scale from Weld Shop Wear to a stylish colorful blend softening my lifestyle? #Winning and #Loved.

 

Oh by the way, my coffee is still hot, black, and strong.:coffee:

 

Monday HUGS for everyone,

 

Mindy???

Link to comment

Top o' the . . . ah . . . mid-afternoon, everyone!

 

@ElizabethStar, I'm glad to hear that things are going well for you at work and better at home!

 

On 9/27/2020 at 6:45 AM, ElizabethStar said:

I stared using my preferred name at work last week. It's nice to finally see, hear and use it.  I also outed myself and changed my name on facebook. So far it's been well received.

 

What's in a name, right?  A lot, it seems, as I'm finding out.  After a false start and a lucky break, I'm finally seeing a gender therapist I think will be very good for me (note that I am way far back from you and most folks here on the 'self-acceptance curve').  During our second session, she asked me if I had a name for myself.  I told her "Jacqueline", or "Jacqui" for short, and she asked me if I wanted her to call me Jacqui.  That caught me unawares -- it's one thing to present yourself as a new identity in cyberspace, but quite another to take it on in the real world (even if only one other person is involved).  She saw my hesitation, went and got the fact sheet I completed when we first met, and told me I could cross out my legal name and put down any name I liked, which she would then use until I told her to stop.  Putting the question in the context of the fact sheet 'helped me through the door', and I crossed out my name and wrote "Jacqui".  It was kind of a 'wow' moment; it felt like I had set something free.  I had another 'wow' moment a couple hours later when she called me Jacqui on the receipt and appointment reminder that she emailed me.

 

I don't foresee asking her to stop. ☺️

 

Anyway, Liz, if you'll forgive the belated nature of this comment, I really love your current profile pic -- that sweet little Mona Lisa smile makes all the difference.  Lovely!

 

Hugs,

Jacqui

 

 

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi 

 

@Jacqui I think that’s great.  I sorta have two groups of doctors, those that live near me and know that I am transgender but have never seen Willow and those who who practice in Charleston at MUSC who know and do get to see Willow.  When they see Willow they get the name and pronouns right.  If they see my dying self, they use my legal name and pronouns.  
 

You see I wish I could make the break through you have made.  I haven’t because I am afraid of backlash.  You made up your mind and did it.  For that you are a better girl than I.  I salute you.

 

hugs 

 

Willow 

Link to comment

All I got to say, this evening, 25 minutes with the gynecologist and the pain. Thank goodness she gave me a prescription for Oxycodone, hopefully it will start helping!

 

Hope you all have a good evening!

Link to comment

Getting good news at work today,getting the president of human resources job at my workplace in a couple weeks.Current president of human resources is retiring next month and applied for it,she put out a big recommendation for me.Going to love it

Link to comment

@Jacqui I more recently put in a request at a LGBTQ+ Health Clinic locally, and used my chosen name in the contact form. A name does have some power and it is amazing when someone in the real world uses that name with me. I might actually start using Amber more often with my therapist to kind of get used to it.

Link to comment

@Kylie. I forgot that I'm going to need to see a gynecologist after I get my bottom surgery.. lol. Oh the joy of womanhood. I'm going to need a gynecological exam, a mammogram, a prostate exam, and a colonoscopy.  Is there anything else that a doctor will have to do to either my bottom or my chest. lol

Link to comment

Its Tuesday morning here in Sydney, and I've just put on the second pot of coffee for the day. @KymmieL, its also 22 degrees here today ... but 22C ... so 74F? Absolutely glorious morning. If I wasn't recovering from surgery I would be out on by bike turning over the pedals and enjoying the morning sunshine.

 

Tuesday is, and has been fro the past 18 months, electrolysis day!  I both love and hate Tuesdays. Hate because I cant shave today and the tiniest hair on my face is dysphoric for me. But love it because, despite the pain, ever little pin prick is one less hair I will have to ever shave again. We (the technician and I) have branched out over the last few weeks to work on my eyebrows. This week I have left mine to grow unchecked for 5 days! Its looking really wild up there this morning. Can't wait until this afternoon when they have all been zapped and I can shave the stragglers and put on some makeup.

 

Kylie, Im sorry to hear about your pain and I hope the oxycodone does the trick for you. I had a little pain last week, but found panedeine forte did the trick ... but I realise my pain was nothing like the pain you must be feeling. So ... hugs.

 

@ElizabethStar, Im so looking forward to hearing how your first day as Elizabeth went - I hope everyone at work was lovely to you. So exciting!

 

@Jacqui congratulations on using your preferred name! I had a similar experience at the hospital last week. I told the nurse I was on HRT for gender dysphoria and she then immediately asked me what my preferred pronouns were. I panicked! No one had ever asked me that before! I mumbled something like "I don't care..." but she began calling me "she" and "her" from then on and so did all of the other staff. It was wonderful!

 

@KendraML congratulations on the new job! I hope it turns out to be everything you hoped for.

 

@Bri2020 A Sephora makeup consult would be a dream come true for me. I don't yet have the courage to try ... maybe next year after the HRT faeries have done some more work ...

 

@Mmindy glad you enjoyed the shopping. Is the a sub on here where we show off clothes and styles? Id really like some fresh ideas. Maybe you can post some pics?

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   6 Members, 0 Anonymous, 136 Guests (See full list)

    • Sally Stone
    • SamC
    • Abigail Genevieve
    • April Marie
    • Betty K
    • MirandaB
  • Recently Browsing   2 members

    • MirandaB
    • Abigail Genevieve

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.7k
    • Total Posts
      768.4k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,024
    • Most Online
      8,356

    JamesyGreen
    Newest Member
    JamesyGreen
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Alscully
      Alscully
      (35 years old)
    2. floruisse
      floruisse
      (40 years old)
    3. Jasmine25
      Jasmine25
      (22 years old)
    4. Trev0rK
      Trev0rK
      (26 years old)
  • Posts

    • Sally Stone
      I did Ashley.  Non-rev travel was one of the major factors for taking the job.  At the time, US Airways had the best non-rev policy in the industry.  It cost $10 to fly coach and $25 to fly first class.  We flew first class whenever there were seats available.  
    • Abigail Genevieve
      You should have a moderator fix what you meant to write as "birth certificate".  Ooops.   I've gone over that verse and am wholly and completely dissatisfied with the SBC exegesis of it, so much so that it was one of the things that helped me break out of a mindset of guit.  Sometime I may strut by stuff as a Hebraist and show what it really means.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I found this   — 450 — Mandate for Leadership: The Conservative Promise Goal #1: Protecting Life, Conscience, and Bodily Integrity. The Secretary should pursue a robust agenda to protect the fundamental right to life, protect con- science rights, and uphold bodily integrity rooted in biological realities, not ideology. From the moment of conception, every human being possesses inherent dignity and worth, and our humanity does not depend on our age, stage of development, race, or abilities. The Secretary must ensure that all HHS programs and activities are rooted in a deep respect for innocent human life from day one until natural death: Abortion and euthanasia are not health care. A robust respect for the sacred rights of conscience, both at HHS and among gov- ernments and institutions funded by it, increases choices for patients and program beneficiaries and furthers pluralism and tolerance. The Secretary must protect Americans’ civil rights by ensuring that HHS programs and activities follow the letter and spirit of religious freedom and conscience-protection laws. Radical actors inside and outside government are promoting harmful identity politics that replaces biological sex with subjective notions of “gender identity” and bases a person’s worth on his or her race, sex, or other identities. This destructive dogma, under the guise of “equity,” threatens American’s fundamental liberties as well as the health and well-being of children and adults alike. The next Secretary must ensure that HHS programs protect children’s minds and bodies and that HHS programs respect parents’ basic right to direct the upbringing, education, and care of their children.   https://static.project2025.org/2025_MandateForLeadership_CHAPTER-14.pdf   First, that is not much, if that is all that is of concern.  Secondly, I have seen all sorts of anti-Trump slander, including the Steele dossier and the lawfare he is now undergoing, to be cynical of any criticism against him, and indirectly this document.    He deserves some of what he is getting, but not all.  Thirdly, I bolded one statement of concern.   I don't think gender identity is subjective.  "Radical actors" is name calling, and there is a lot of that going around.  Maybe I am not seeing everything of concern or reading this right, but i would discuss with the author of this document concerning this.
    • Willow
      Good evening   well I finally finished reading my textbook.  Yeah.  But I still have a lot more to go for the class.     My endocrinologist always asks me about lactation.  And yes I have had some very small amounts of leakage but not on any regular basis.  I figure I blocked the discharge Duce when I pierced my nipples with scare tissue.  But who knows.  I also get asked about mammograms.  I e had my first or baseline and this fall I will need to schedule my second.   As someone in the midst of studying the Old Testament, I can say that I haven’t found any mention of pending damnation for being transgender or intersex.  The closest it comes is a verse that says men should not wear women’s clothing.  Now I don’t know each and everyone’s particulars, but I know I meet the medical definition of female gender, and even in Ohio, a State that until recently refused to allow bitch certificates to be changed, I meet the criteria.  Therefore I can only conclude I am not a man wearing women’s clothing.  But there is a somewhat different scholarly explanation of that law that it should not be taken as literally as the haters want.  Mostly men should not pretend to be women to ex ape from their enemies. Or tried to hide from God.     willow
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Well, the left wing has been doing that.    I read a few things while trying to find out what the problem is and liked what I read.  But I am a conservative.    Is there something specific in there that is of concern?  Does it promise somewhere to erase trans folk? That would be problematic.
    • Ivy
      It's a plan to basically completely take over the government by the right wing.
    • Ivy
      I'm actually in Asheville tonight.  Some of the people in the support group invited me for dinner after the meeting.  We're going to get together again tomorrow again. It's been nice, 4 trans women and 1 trans man, together ar a restaurant.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I found https://www.project2025.org/policy/   I will have to read it.  I have not.  What is of concern?   The link provided earlier goes back to this forum.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      My parents were life long Democrats. 
    • Ivy
      'Nuff said. Yeah I'm not thrilled with Biden either. There are some conservative ideas I'm good with.  And I do feel that the current Democratic party is too cozy with the bankers and wealthy.  But despite all their talk, when it comes down to it, so are the Republicans.  And it's not the Dems calling for our eradication. Unfortunately, I see this election as existential for trans folks.  
    • Mmindy
      Good evening everyone,   @Birdie your CNA Is ill informed about breast and proper bra fitting.   My wife and I are checking out a campground up in Michigan just a little North of Saginaw, MI. We had a great meal at a local tavern serving delicious perch fillet dinner.   We’re going to check out the Saginaw,MI Bay area for summer time activities for when we come back on occasion. We belong to a camping club call Adventure Outdoors and have free camping at their resorts around Michigan and Ohio.   Hugs,   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋    
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I agree.   Biden has been known to switch positions without notice, whether on abortion, Gaza or gay marriage.  Most of what he has done has been via executive order and decision, so it does not carry the force of lasting law and can be easily reversed.  I really do not trust him at all.   Trump says a lot of things.  He switches his position all the time.  Most of what he wants to do will require legislation to accomplish, some of which will simply never become law.  I do not trust him at all.   I'm not sure which is worse for trans people specifically because of this, and the fact that the other issues that surround trans folk which I attempted to isolate this question from, but here I go :) also affect trans people along with everyone else.   In either case trans folk need to be prepared. 
    • Carolyn Marie
      I'm certain that there are some, if not many, but you would be hard pressed to find them willing to speak up on this forum.  There are many trans folk who are conservative, and believe that Biden's non-trans related policies are terrible.  Those include his economic, foreign policy, border security, and environmental policies.  I'm a lifelong Democrat, and even I don't like all of Biden's policies.  It comes down to who would do the most damage to the most people, and the most damage to America as a going democratic nation which has respect for the rule of law.   Carolyn Marie
    • MaeBe
      Thank you for continuing to share your story, Sally!   Willa sounded like a grand friend, I'm sorry for your loss. :(
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Not all conservatives are for Trump.  I am far from thrilled he is running.  Just wanted to make that clear.
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...