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Coming out is inevitable.


Ashlee

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Hi all. Well, I've been planning a timeline for my transition and its definitely not going as planned. I had planned on coming out in about a year but people already suspect. I live in a very redneck town and they noticed anything put of the ordinary and not in camouflage. I've only been on hrt for a around 10 weeks but apparently its noticeable. I have also started laser  hair removal and that is also noticeable i guess. At first people commented on my weight loss, now its smart remarks like "your eyebrows need waxing" or "are your legs shaved too" or "I wish I had your figure". I don't know. I like me and am happy the way I'm starting to look,finally. One "friend" saw me, laughed, shook his head and just walked away. I wear jeans and long sleeve tees most of the time and only no makeup so as not to get murdered in this town so I present as a boy, kinda. I'm only about 63" tall and pretty petite now so I would be an easy target. I'm was planning on moving to Miami or Ft Lauderdale anyways, just not so soon. Not sure where I'm going with this, maybe I am just venting because there is no one else to talk to. 

 

Also I'll attach a picture of me at the 2 week of my first laser treatment. My shadow is very minimal now. Its crazy how much that makes a difference. The picture is after all day with no makeup in as boyish mode as I get.

:)

 

20181021_173855.jpg

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  • Forum Moderator

Ashlee, I'm about 6 weeks behind you on HRT but I ask myself questions regarding my timeline periodically.  I'm much older so I doubt I'll have as much change as you have experienced.  As some have mentioned to me, the changes sometimes dictate the speed of one's transition and their "coming out" timeline.  I was really hoping I wouldn't have to make any big decisions til 2019 as to coming out to family.  I'm not sure if that'll be possible or not..if things start to change as rapidly as they did in your case.  I'm sort of playing it by ear but right now only my wife knows anything at this point.  I hope I have a little more time before I'm forced to share with my family and friends..but who knows?

 

SusanMtF

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Hi Ashlee.  You might look into the Tampa area as I know there is an active TG community and the area is fairly tolerant.  

 

You look great for having just started!   Please be safe.

 

Jani 

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2 hours ago, SusanMtF said:

Ashlee, I'm about 6 weeks behind you on HRT but I ask myself questions regarding my timeline periodically.  I'm much older so I doubt I'll have as much change as you have experienced.  As some have mentioned to me, the changes sometimes dictate the speed of one's transition and their "coming out" timeline.  I was really hoping I wouldn't have to make any big decisions til 2019 as to coming out to family.  I'm not sure if that'll be possible or not..if things start to change as rapidly as they did in your case.  I'm sort of playing it by ear but right now only my wife knows anything at this point.  I hope I have a little more time before I'm forced to share with my family and friends..but who knows?

 

SusanMtF

Hi, I was planning on waiting a lot longer than a few months for sure. I go In to see my dr and get blood work for  my 3 month checkup in about about 2 weeks. I'm hoping all goes well with that and I will figure it out from there I suppose. I guess everyones timeline is so much different. Definitely can't go by someone else's experiences. Don't be surprised if things start going fast for you. Im 45 and holy smokes, the changes are just crazy. My emotions are way way different, my boobs hurt so bad, my skinny jeans aren't so skinny in the butt area anymore but still lost weight, skin is so soft and man muscle is melting away. Things are heavier too me. These are all things coming up for you, and its awesome! Sounds like im complaining but no. Its so great. I wouldn't trade what going on with my mind and body for anything. Just keep on keeping on I suppose :)

 

Ashlee 

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2 hours ago, Jani said:

Hi Ashlee.  You might look into the Tampa area as I know there is an active TG community and the area is fairly tolerant.  

 

You look great for having just started!   Please be safe.

 

Jani 

Hi, that funny. I was actually looking at Tampa/Sarasota as well. I've lived there before and loved it. My Dr is also based out of Sarasota so that would be nice. I use to frequent a club called the castle a lot the first time I started to transition. I think the costs of Florida are pretty much safe but the inner parts are very very intolerant. I don't make a very good country girl at all. I don't hunt, fish go mudding or anything like that. I hate sports ball games. Whats scary is im caring less and less about what people think. Im not sure why but I it doesn't really bother me if people know I'm  trans. A couple girls have guessed it and are cool with it and hang out. They ask moisturizer advice and hair growing advice. The guys though, thats another story. None of them hang anymore and I don't care but I'm so scared of ending up in a sugar cane field dead. Im saving as much as possible, which is hard while transitioning without insurance, to relocate as quickly as possible. I go to Lauderdale a lot, walk around downtown taking pictures and whatever else and nobody notices me. No wispers or weird looks. I love it. Thank you for the compliment btw. Im actually starting like the person looking at me from the mirror. I'm starting to feel like me. :)

 

Ashlee

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Yes I think the coasts are fine.  I don't do the activities you list either, never have.  It's OK to not be concerned with others thoughts but still take care because you may become a target as some people see us as a threat to their being. Odd, I know.  

 

You should like the person in the mirror, she's good looking!  Accepting who we see is important. 

 

Cheers, Jani

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On 10/22/2018 at 9:45 AM, Jani said:

Yes I think the coasts are fine.  I don't do the activities you list either, never have.  It's OK to not be concerned with others thoughts but still take care because you may become a target as some people see us as a threat to their being. Odd, I know.  

 

You should like the person in the mirror, she's good looking!  Accepting who we see is important. 

 

Cheers, Jani

 

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I am definitely looking forward to getting back to the coast. I do fear safty here. I am always trying to be aware of everything around me and never really go anywhere in the community. I wonder around downtown Miami or Lauderdale and no one takes a second look. I just blend in. So nice. Thanks for the confidence boost :)

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